Sexual intro... (more of a romantic to be honest). I just skip the who "hi, what's up" part. Most of them like it, some don't. It just filters the time wasters and those not interested.

I like David Shade's and mode one's stuff on dirty talk. It has helped me a lot in bed and also with my text game. Making a girl wet or coming while reading my text is so powerful!

The standard how are you doing, etc. questions are good for after the 10th interaction when I also want to appear "normal"

Two weeks ago my favorite girl dropped out of rotation. She said she felt guilty cheating on her boyfriend all the time and wanted to go back to being friends with me. I just told her I wasn't interested and goodbye. Her LINE statuses have all been things related to me for the last two weeks. Then she texts me at 3 in the morning this morning saying, "I can't stop thinking about you... I want to kiss you..." I'm leaning toward ignore, but if any of you good texters out there have a good idea, I'm all ears.

(08-26-2014 09:43 PM)robreke Wrote:  a girl I had been seeing a few months called it off this week. So...I walked away and told her she could call me if she changes her mind.

Her birthday is next weekend and she had been telling me about it. Should I text her just a quick "happy birthday" as kind of a brief good faith deal? I'm dating other women but wouldn't mind getting this girl back eventually. I don't know if texting her would help or hurt getting her back one day.

I don't plan on calling her..but think she may call me back one day in the next few weeks/months.

If you text her Happy Birthday she will have contempt for you. She will be feeling, "I broke up with him and he's still pining over me, waiting for an excuse to talk with me. He thinks I'm amazing, but I know I'm not, in fact I'm really nothing special at all, and if he thinks I'm this amazing thing, them he's an idiot and even lower than I am!"

This dialog is what unconsciously goes on in the back of every person's mind when they think the other sees them as the One because they know they are not the One, they are much lower than that, and anyone who sees them as the One must be even lower than they are.

In general, this is the rub that comes with the desire in having someone see us as the One. As they say, careful what you wish for.

Added a random hot girl on Facebook. One that doesn't seem to be attention whote. ~400 friends, ~20 likes on the sexy photos.

Our convo:
- Do we know each other?
- oop haha, usually I don't add random people. My crazy head probably found you for interesting and charming.
- This means?

She is still replying even when she knows it's random and pushing for very logical answers. Saying something along "wanted to get to know you" or "we can chat" is simply creepy and screams stalking.
I was thinking of something along "we can pretend we met at a club last night and had a really nice conversation so I added you"

What do you guys think?

(09-01-2014 03:27 AM)sailor_09 Wrote:  Added a random hot girl on Facebook. One that doesn't seem to be attention whote. ~400 friends, ~20 likes on the sexy photos.

Our convo:
- Do we know each other?
- oop haha, usually I don't add random people. My crazy head probably found you for interesting and charming.
- This means?

She is still replying even when she knows it's random and pushing for very logical answers. Saying something along "wanted to get to know you" or "we can chat" is simply creepy and screams stalking.
I was thinking of something along "we can pretend we met at a club last night and had a really nice conversation so I added you"

What do you guys think?

The way I see it, she's either up for meeting a random dude or she's not. Outside of referring to a mutual acquaintance or friend to put her at ease, you can't really sugar coat the situation to make it seem other than what it is.

So I think you just have to go straight for the kill: "I don't normally do this, but you seem interesting--how about we meet for coffee sometime"

So I went out on a date with this chick during the weekend. It hit off really well until the last 45min of the date when I just got too drunk and my self-love got a bit too far to the point where all I did was talking about myself(not bragging but just being an abnoxious prick) and I was acting a bit desperate trying to kiss her even tho she refused.

She's obviously a little interested if she spent 3h 30min of her life with me. But what should I text next to set up a new date?

I'm thinking like:

"Lets see each other thursday. a more sober hang out this time"

Would appreciate if someone could help me with a more cocky/funny way to set up a date here which also makes a point that I'm aware that I was a bit on top during the end of our last date.

(09-01-2014 05:48 PM)asdfas Wrote:  So I went out on a date with this chick during the weekend. It hit off really well until the last 45min of the date when I just got too drunk and my self-love got a bit too far to the point where all I did was talking about myself(not bragging but just being an abnoxious prick) and I was acting a bit desperate trying to kiss her even tho she refused.

She's obviously a little interested if she spent 3h 30min of her life with me. But what should I text next to set up a new date?

I'm thinking like:

"Lets see each other thursday. a more sober hang out this time"

Would appreciate if someone could help me with a more cocky/funny way to set up a date here which also makes a point that I'm aware that I was a bit on top during the end of our last date.

You only get one first impression. If you blew it, you blew it. There are other girls.

The line you suggested sounds too much like an apology; it puts you in a weak, supplicating position. It's probably better not to mention it at all.

If you insist on alluding to your previous slip-up, it's better to sarcastically agree & amplify your fault: "lets see each other thur. I didn't get to talk/drink enough last time."

(09-01-2014 03:27 AM)sailor_09 Wrote:  Added a random hot girl on Facebook. One that doesn't seem to be attention whote. ~400 friends, ~20 likes on the sexy photos.

Our convo:
- Do we know each other?
- oop haha, usually I don't add random people. My crazy head probably found you for interesting and charming.
- This means?

She is still replying even when she knows it's random and pushing for very logical answers. Saying something along "wanted to get to know you" or "we can chat" is simply creepy and screams stalking.
I was thinking of something along "we can pretend we met at a club last night and had a really nice conversation so I added you"

What do you guys think?

do not get sucked into a facebook chat with them. try to switch to phone and text and meet up. if they balk, then they are not that interested and just move on.

I texted this girl

" Hey what's up?"
"In lab"

What's a good way to reach her later and set up a meet up?

(09-02-2014 04:09 PM)simondice Wrote:  I texted this girl

" Hey what's up?"
"In lab"

What's a good way to reach her later and set up a meet up?

Dumb question, ignore

I had a flake, the girl responded

" sorry I was definitely passed out "

How to go about it?

(09-03-2014 09:58 PM)simondice Wrote:  I had a flake, the girl responded

" sorry I was definitely passed out "

How to go about it?

Two options:

1) Ignore. Radio silence for at least several days, then re-engage with a feeler text.

2) Assume the sale for another meetup. Start by teasing her for passing out--e.g. call her "grandma," "old lady" or "lightweight". Then say "You'll have to make it up to me" and tell her she has to buy the first round or cook you dinner or something. Shows that she has to work and frames her as chasing you.

(09-04-2014 11:42 AM)Donkey_Riding Wrote:  

(09-03-2014 09:58 PM)simondice Wrote:  I had a flake, the girl responded

" sorry I was definitely passed out "

How to go about it?

Two options:

1) Ignore. Radio silence for at least several days, then re-engage with a feeler text.

2) Assume the sale for another meetup. Start by teasing her for passing out--e.g. call her "grandma," "old lady" or "lightweight". Then say "You'll have to make it up to me" and tell her she has to buy the first round or cook you dinner or something. Shows that she has to work and frames her as chasing you.

I'm already thinking this one is beyond irreparable

RVF please give me the unfiltered version of how I fucked up, do not be gentle.

(09-04-2014 12:31 PM)simondice Wrote:  

(09-04-2014 11:42 AM)Donkey_Riding Wrote:  

(09-03-2014 09:58 PM)simondice Wrote:  I had a flake, the girl responded

" sorry I was definitely passed out "

How to go about it?

Two options:

1) Ignore. Radio silence for at least several days, then re-engage with a feeler text.

2) Assume the sale for another meetup. Start by teasing her for passing out--e.g. call her "grandma," "old lady" or "lightweight". Then say "You'll have to make it up to me" and tell her she has to buy the first round or cook you dinner or something. Shows that she has to work and frames her as chasing you.

I'm already thinking this one is beyond irreparable

RVF please give me the unfiltered version of how I fucked up, do not be gentle.

You sort of followed the advice you received, but it was poorly implemented. I'm going to break down what I see, but I'm sure others who have better text game can clarify further:

"It's fine" - Boom, your first two words excuse her from her forgetful/lazy to outright poor behaviour.

"I had fun anyway" - This is not a DHV. At best it comes off as neutral, but at worst it comes off as defensive/fake. It doesn't challenge her at all and worse it doesn't intrigue her.

"You can make it up with a free drink or a massage." - This is worse with how you started off the line, but I wouldn't ever call out how she can make it up to you until she asks or it comes up. Otherwise it just comes off as tryhard.

ALSO, the line was way too long. Look at the length of her replies and yours.

"This isn't a negotiation. Being sassy is not cute at all." - Too serious, will only add fuel to the fire instead of letting it die out or moving forward. I would've gone with silence, silence followed with "gay" or "unsubscribe," a wrong person text, or a neg-type thing that is somewhat vague such as "real cute."

"Demanding is more fun than it looks" - I actually initially thought this was poor but I think it was a rather good save. You actually gained a little frame since she then started on the defensive with "Yes but also not cute." You probably could've gone into logistics from there or started flirting. Your response was not horrible, but you definitely needed to get the conversation moving towards a more fun/exciting/interesting direction.

Remember, girls just want to have fun.

@simondice:

First of all, it's probably over as soon as she flakes on you. It is very rare for a girl who flakes to ever meet you.

So what you text at this point probably doesn't matter anyway. But as far as the texting goes:

simondice Wrote:This isn't a negotiation. Being sassy is not cute at all.

Not bad, because you're laying things down and challenging her. But it seems like you're putting too much effort into this text. You've used two periods compared to her breezy lack of punctuation. I think it might have been better to go more nuclear here: "ur loss" (note the textspeak with no period). This lays it down and shows her you don't give a shit because you're higher value. She will either respond to re-engage you, or you've culled her out. Another possible response: "pfft"--unimpressed and dismissive; this also puts the ball in her court. Your reply here should communicate that because she's rejected your proposal, she has to be the one to put in the effort to continue the conversation. You want to put her in the situation where it's clear that she can take it or leave it.

As far as the rest of the exchange goes, I think you're caving to her frame too much by responding to her assertions directly. By going off of her comments about "demanding" and "cute," you're letting her lead the conversation. Your replies are too logical. It would be better to challenge her in a more playful/DGAF fashion. E.g. "little spoon doesn't make the rules" (credit to Roissy).

getting shit tested left and right by this very conservative girl. saw a pic of me with some girl and she flips. got her naked last date. starts shit testing me asking if we're "dating" or not i pass all her tests. i ask her for a third date and she shit tests me saying she's too busy for me and she sends this wall of text. she likes me but thinks im some crazy badboy player, really i'm after her because she's ltr material.


how do I address this? I want another date. Currently I'm going radio silent.





I can sense the dread.

(09-05-2014 01:32 AM)Valhalla Wrote:  getting shit tested left and right by this very conservative girl. saw a pic of me with some girl and she flips. got her naked last date. starts shit testing me asking if we're "dating" or not i pass all her tests. i ask her for a third date and she shit tests me saying she's too busy for me and she sends this wall of text. she likes me but thinks im some crazy badboy player, really i'm after her because she's ltr material.


how do I address this? I want another date. Currently I'm going radio silent.





I can sense the dread. :laugh:

I'm not sure I completely got you. You got her naked on the last date and that's it, no further?
if I got it right, the girl freak out becuase of that. it feel weird for her afterwards. what exactly happened?

If I got it right, radio silent is not going to help you, it just make it feel more weird for her.
I would send something like
"[Her name], I understand where you are coming from. I understand that you got hurt in the past. But being on the defensive don't going to help any of us. it's impossible to get to know people in SMS and also it feels weird to talk over here. so, let's meet like normal people, and tell me everything that bother you. are you available tommorow?"

it's less effective the more time that passes..

Damn, hamster is going crazy on this one. ^^^he's right, the more radio silence the more she's ready to eject.

He's also right on meeting up, fuck the texting and phone, meet face to face, eye to eye. Women tend to tone it down when being in an actual conversation. Make sure you're dominant but address her concerns, just don't put her on the pedestal since you want an LTR.

@hu that sounds beta and plays into her frame too hard. Her hamstering isn't even true. She's saying it because seeing me with the other girl let her know im playing the field the messing around is irrelevant.

I'd rather say something like

Pressure flip and drama game

"I'd take you more seriously if you'd make time for me" (pressure flip it on her and create funny drama, i asked her out last week so i went out with a different girl)

One liner reframe

"Good thing I'm a nice guy"

A&A

"That's why me and you and are getting married on the third date so we'll be together...FOREVER an EVER"

Vulnerability and drama game...

"i am looking for something real but I've been hurt in the past and it's hard to let someone in. give it time. it's really complicated I'll tell you when we meet"

(09-05-2014 12:39 PM)Valhalla Wrote:  @hu that sounds beta and plays into her frame too hard. Her hamstering isn't even true. She's saying it because seeing me with the other girl let her know im playing the field the messing around is irrelevant.

I'd rather say something like

Pressure flip and drama game

"I'd take you more seriously if you'd make time for me" (pressure flip it on her and create funny drama, i asked her out last week so i went out with a different girl)

One liner reframe

"Good thing I'm a nice guy"

A&A

"That's why me and you and are getting married on the third date so we'll be together...FOREVER an EVER"

Vulnerability and drama game...

"i am looking for something real but I've been hurt in the past and it's hard to let someone in. give it time. it's really complicated I'll tell you when we meet"

You know that's actually a great point of view, looks like I've got some reading to do.

(09-05-2014 12:39 PM)Valhalla Wrote:  @hu that sounds beta and plays into her frame too hard. Her hamstering isn't even true. She's saying it because seeing me with the other girl let her know im playing the field the messing around is irrelevant.

You're wrong in my opinion. If you're actually interested in her for LTR, you would do well to listen to the advice given. Even a simple, "I'm really busy but let's get together and we can chat about it" would likely work fine.

You need to have her play into your frame while knowing you'll address her concerns. She needs the comfort before she opens up her legs to you.

@Valhalla - She just wrote you almost an A4 size of SMS, almost anything you going to say will not be "beta".
just don't answer to her statements directly - which I didn't did.

It looks like she really into you but at the same time really have some concerns, so:

"I'd take you more seriously if you'd make time for me"
"Good thing I'm a nice guy"
"That's why me and you and are getting married on the third date so we'll be together...FOREVER an EVER"

All of those are too much of Player-flirty approach (what raise her red flags at the first place) doing it will just strengthen her fear. You even don't try to set a date directly and even if she answer you going to beat around the bush without a point.
I think there is a time you need to stop (or at least reduce) playing games - and that time is now, with her.

"i am looking for something real but I've been hurt in the past and it's hard to let someone in. give it time. it's really complicated I'll tell you when we meet"
it's OK becuase she probably hurt in the past and thats why she cautious, but thats ok as long as she believe it. (some girls may take it as bullshit - she already think you are too much of a player)

@AneroidOcean - Sound good too. I just added what I added to show her that I understand why she acts like this, and will understand even better when we meet.

Banged a girl last Thursday first date from online.

I want this girl as a mini-LTR.

My only open slot this last weekend was Saturday night so I said lets hang out then. She responds she is busy. I throw out this last Wednesday she agrees.

Fastforward to last Wednesday she cancels 4 hours before because she got called into work. I text back "k" a few hours later and she responds with a pic of her at her work desk with the message "Booooooooo"

The next day (yesterday) I respond with "whats your schedule this weekend". (Her work schedule is all over the place).

She takes over 24 hours to respond (today) with a short text with her weekend schedule.

Since she was busy last Saturday, then cancelled on me for work Wednesday, then took over a day to respond to me...

I feel like it would be weak to respond soon aka this weekend..

How long do you guys think I should wait to hit her up? Her schedule leaves her open Saturday and Sunday night. I strike now for a 2nd date or let her wait in silence over the weekend. If I don't strike I have to go through throwing out days and guessing her schedule again.

@Travesty444 To build a relationship with a girl you have to first build a strong emotional bond and connection. Use to be that by the time you had sex with a girl that would usually be there but now girls are having sex just like guys. It doesn't mean anything to them. So having sex with girl doesn't mean you have built the foundation for a relationship. For a relationship you have to get a girl to emotionally invested in you. Ironically it is actually easier to do this if you withhold sex. If a girl wants sex and you withhold it, you create sexual tension which triggers emotions. This also makes you stand apart from other guys and gets her thinking about you. The more you can get a girl thinking about you the more emotionally invested in you she will become. Some guys advocate having sex as quickly as possible. I personally don't do this if I am looking for a relationship which I usually am. I focus on building an emotional bond and a connection rather than getting sex from her. Once you have that, the sex is easy, and a relationship becomes possible because you have the foundation for one. There is a good chance if you have sex on the first date that the girl may feel that you will never view her as relationship material. This has happened to me a number of times. In another post I explicitly warn guys about this:

http://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-38993.html

This should maybe belong on the thread "How to get laid on okc" but I'm stuck. Anyhow , I noticed this perfect 8 on okc and decided to send her a message. I did not come with a unique opener and decided to go straightforward.
Me: Hey Sarah , how r u ?
Her: Fine and u ?
Me: Pretty good . How was your day ?
Her: (she actually never answered since august 31st)

Her profile states that she's interested in LTR which is not my case. "Am'hit that pussy & I'm gone" . I believe that this was the major turnoff for her maybe . Help me out guys.