(05-20-2016 10:19 AM)DjembaDjemba Wrote: When searching for, or in an LTR, do you guys discriminate based on her income? Are you guys getting into LTRs with hot dime pieces, career women, or a combination of both?
When it comes to building a long term legacy in terms of financial security and long term stability, can minority men afford to be wifing up women who don't bring some type of (non sexual) asset to the bargaining table?
Is the trophy wife worth it or is it just another unnecessary expense that can be done away with and replaced with something more practical?
That's a complicated question.
1) She makes too little money, she's a burden while you're dating. That will only increase if you LTR her, and knock her up.
2) She makes too much money
- at first it's fine...but then it's not
- if she sets her hooks into you, she can manipulate you with words, sex, and money.
- if she's competitive, or not observant - she is gonna always want the best of the best.
3) You make the same amount roughly - She's less interested in you if money is a concern of hers.
4) She starts out poor and then gets rich (student becomes a doctor) - balance changes.
5) You start rich (relative) and go through a rough patch - suddenly the love ain't there no more.
6) Same level, She is fine with you making nothing now, but expects you to make a lot more.
These are the ones I can think of in 2 minutes.
Money is the #1 thing married couples fight about and break up over.
- spending too little
- spending too much
- not saving/investing
- her monetary expectations not being met.
- economy changes
Wherever you start with a chick in terms of her money expectations, recognize that they change - but usually you need more than her for her to be happy.
So she might make low 6 figures, but you need to make high 6 figures at the start and continue to make more.
And a lawyer that takes home 4,000 a week is not the same as a stripper who takes home 4,000 a week. And the lawyer isn't the same as the doctor.
How she makes her money, the hours she spends, who she spends it with....
Say you're some mid level executive and you're dating a real estate agent. Your money is steadily going up over time, but her money is feast or famine. She'll make a grip one month, more than you...then nothing else. And if you know people in that industry, a lot of RE agents like to show off/have to show off. They have to look successful before they even are successful sometimes.
So she's getting that Benz lease when she's making used Toyota Camry money. That 500 bucks for the note, 200 for the insurance, 200 for the gas... that means whatever resources she has to spend on the two of you (groceries/meals out...) are less.
Her money is her money
Your money is "our" money.
You might think you want to date rich, or better yet rich and educated..ideally from a "good" family, and with good credit.....But those chicks have a tendency to get involved in making your financial decisions. Making you think about the sedan instead of the coupe. Real subtle stuff.
...........
So when it comes to screening, when she's trying to work her way up the roster you have to take note of
- how selfish she is
- how careful or careless she is
- education and educational path
- job/career path
Say you meet a nice chick, but she works for an actual newspaper. The writing is on the wall when it comes to that. If you pick her long term, she's going to be jobless at some point. Her not having work not only takes away from the household finances - but can wreck her emotionally - and now you have to pick up the pieces.
I don't have a good answer here about what to look for, but definitely what to avoid.
WIA