Post: #176

(04-15-2014 02:49 AM)Skotch Wrote:  They say they don't, but they do. If you're walking with them or standing on the train, they'll often check your bicep.

I just read your "100 approaches" thread. A common theme in that thread is the flakiness of Japanese women. That's something I rarely experienced before I got married because I mostly met women through social circles and dating sites and none of those ever flaked. Once I had a stable of about six or seven girls, I didn't bother trying to pick any more up unless someone basically fell into my lap. At that time I was not game aware and I knew I had some major weaknesses in approach ability, so I lazily stuck to social circle and classifieds.

Anyway, I've been trying to figure out why Japanese women are so flakey if picked up from cold approaches. There are probably several reasons, but I think one reason is that you aren't yet in any of their social circles. If you don't belong to one of their social groups, then you are basically irrelevant, no matter how good of an initial conversation you had. If true, is there a way to give a J-girl the perception that you and her move in the same social circle?

Post: #177

(04-15-2014 03:10 AM)Carlos100 Wrote:  

(04-15-2014 02:49 AM)Skotch Wrote:  They say they don't, but they do. If you're walking with them or standing on the train, they'll often check your bicep.

I just read your "100 approaches" thread. A common theme in that thread is the flakiness of Japanese women. That's something I rarely experienced before I got married because I mostly met women through social circles and dating sites and none of those ever flaked. Once I had a stable of about six or seven girls, I didn't bother trying to pick any more up unless someone basically fell into my lap. At that time I was not game aware and I knew I had some major weaknesses in approach ability, so I lazily stuck to social circle and classifieds.

Anyway, I've been trying to figure out why Japanese women are so flakey if picked up from cold approaches. There are probably several reasons, but I think one reason is that you aren't yet in any of their social circles. If you don't belong to one of their social groups, then you are basically irrelevant, no matter how good of an initial conversation you had. If true, is there a way to give a J-girl the perception that you and her move in the same social circle?

One way to get around the flakiness is to escalate to a same day lay. Honestly, I haven't done it from a day approach in Japan, but I know guys with excellent game and Japanese language who make this their bread and butter. There are plenty of zoned-out girls wandering the streets ready to follow a strong lead and get some more stimulation than their shopping and smartphones will give them.

Post: #178

(04-15-2014 03:10 AM)Carlos100 Wrote:  Anyway, I've been trying to figure out why Japanese women are so flakey if picked up from cold approaches.

Guys generally hate to admit this but girls are not flakey if their interest level is high. The majority of girls who "flake" were never interested anyway - they just like the validation of being chased. Unfortunately these girls tend to be the hot ones.

The problem is that even many Japan veterans mistake friendliness/attention whoring from J-girls for actual interest. Still happens to me occasionally.

Then there are the girls who were interested but get a "boyfriend" the day after you meet them. Or the girls who talk to a friend about you only to be warned off from meeting you. Japanese girls are dumb like that.

I've even had girls make me "promise" to meet them again only to never contact me ever again. These days I just chuckle when this kind of shit happens.

Some guys insist on chasing these dead leads in the hope of banging them but I have no time for these girls. One flake and they are gone. I just hit the gym and forget she ever existed.

My take on it is that it doesn't matter why they flake. Focus on establishing a good connection but expect nothing. Open lots of girls. Some will reject you. Some will flake. Some will turn up and put out. You rarely know which ones are which in advance.

Sometimes it is the girl who acts the coldest in set who you think you have no chance with who ends up messaging you first. Then she comes over to suck your dick with no hassle. Game in Japan is a little bit Zen-like in that way.

Post: #179

^^I no longer make a big deal out of J-girls being so flakey. That's just how it is, I'm not going to change it, and there's no point in thinking about it. I don't bother thinking thoughts like "Is she going to flake?", "Was she interested?" "blahblahblah". I just assume she's going to flake. The solution to this, like you said, is to try to get them in the sack the same day/night you meet them. Also, just realise you there's just a small percentage of women who don't flake, but with enough approaches, women belonging to that small number start to add up.

I've lost count of the times I've exchanged numbers with a girl, recieved a text from her the next morning in which she said she had a great time and would love to meet up again, only to encounter absolute radiosilence afterwards. You just have to understand that friendliness, enthusiasm, light touching on her part, even her making the suggestion to meet up, along with other supposed signs of "interest" mean nothing.

Don't even bother thinking about whether or not she'll flake. Message them and arrange dates close to your place with the small fraction of those that respond. If she flakes last minute you've at least wasted no time or money on travel.

It should also be mentioned that flaking is typical of Japanese people in general. I've got male students who flake on lessons constantly, too. Based on what others have told me, it sounds like flaking is a combination of two things, namely (1) they can't tell you upfront that they're not interested, so they put on this show of false interest, not because they're afraid of hurting your feelings, as they like to say, but because it saves them the discomfort of havin to say no to someone's face. (2) young Japanese have no sense of social obligation when it comes to meetings. Again, this does not seem to be a particularly female thing, either. The idea that making an appointment for 17:00 has any other meaning than "MAYBE 17:00 if I still feel like it at 16:55" is just foreign to most Japanese in their 20s. You might have (3) meaning they were originally interested in you, but after bringing you up in front of their friends, they were told "Eeeewww, a foreigner? KIMOI!" (which is why I get enraged whenever some ignoramus jumps out of the woods saying "Oh, the Japaneese LOVE foreigners!")

Post: #180

Are your biceps closer to a toned Brad Pitt or Arnold from "Predator"? My boy is from Japan and he always told me big muscles and facial hair were turnoffs.

Post: #181

(04-15-2014 09:25 AM)Sargon of Akkad Wrote:  It should also be mentioned that flaking is typical of Japanese people in general. I've got male students who flake on lessons constantly, too. Based on what others have told me, it sounds like flaking is a combination of two things, namely (1) they can't tell you upfront that they're not interested, so they put on this show of false interest, not because they're afraid of hurting your feelings, as they like to say, but because it saves them the discomfort of havin to say no to someone's face. (2) young Japanese have no sense of social obligation when it comes to meetings. Again, this does not seem to be a particularly female thing, either. The idea that making an appointment for 17:00 has any other meaning than "MAYBE 17:00 if I still feel like it at 16:55" is just foreign to most Japanese in their 20s. You might have (3) meaning they were originally interested in you, but after bringing you up in front of their friends, they were told "Eeeewww, a foreigner? KIMOI!" (which is why I get enraged whenever some ignoramus jumps out of the woods saying "Oh, the Japaneese LOVE foreigners!")

I haven't experienced flakiness with Japanese male friends, so I'm surprised to find that you guys are experiencing it. Perhaps it may be that my friends are older, or are more solid members of my social circles so for them to flake would give them a bad reputation in the group. I understand why bartenders and bars in Japan often invite their customers to "friend" or "like" them on Facebook, because they are trying to form a social group of their customers because they understand that that is a powerful way to attract loyalty with Japanese people.

Anyway, I remember reading once that going on a date in Japan has a much stronger implication of sex and LTR for the woman than it does in other countries. If so, that might be another reason why the women flake so much. It could mean they are having cold feet about what the date might entail in terms of seriousness.

An ex-roommate of mine who did more nanpa than I did would try to get around this by inviting the girl and her girlfriend both out. That way, it would seem more like a group activity which would lessen the pressure of it being a date and also make it more like a social group activity. The girls he met seemed to flake less when he used that approach, but he still had to try and isolate the girl he liked from her friend which wasn't always easy, of course. He would often invite one of his guy friends to occupy the other girl, but if none were available he would entertain them both himself. None of those dates ever led to threesomes for him, although I think if he had been more game aware they possibly could have.

Post: #182

(04-15-2014 05:09 PM)rhodey Wrote:  Are your biceps closer to a toned Brad Pitt or Arnold from "Predator"? My boy is from Japan and he always told me big muscles and facial hair were turnoffs.

This is what people will tell you but muscles are definitely an advantage.

Japanese guys don't generally work out so you don't even need to be huge to stand out. It's ridiculous how feminized Japanese guys are becoming here but it's just more easy pussy for me.

Post: #183

(04-14-2014 12:16 AM)RawGod Wrote:  

(04-08-2014 11:08 AM)iknowexactly Wrote:  there's a teaser... what's the fucked up things below the surface?

One thing I noticed in my single day there was how ugly girls working in stores looked utterly miserable. Still smiling, but I could see right through it.

Oh man, where to start. Japan is just an incredibly lonely and atomized place for many people. Tokyo or Osaka, millions and millions of people filed away in their little apartments, often alone, in sexless marriages, salarymen with absolutely no autonomy getting fucked in the ass at work and by their wives.

There is a lot of interpersonal cruelty, sadism you might say, under the surface, and the thing is, compared to Western countries, there is almost no escape. Due to language and cultural conditioning, they feel locked in to their nation and their way of life in a way that we English speakers don't. We have this expansive sense of self-improvement, fuck the man, start a business, travel the world and have sex with women from different countries, be a maverick and you'll be OK. It may be partly a myth but it gives us hope. They just don't have that over there.

When I lived there it was great to give a good time to some of those unhappy shopgirls. They may have been 5s and 6s, honestly, but it was nice to be a bit of larger than life fun in their very boring and regimented lives.

This.

Most people just take it and shut up about it. So many stories of working 11 hour days for years and for what? No wonder dudes here develop all kinds of complexes and paraphilias.

Even those who have been to the west most often just fall right into the system. Its perverse. Dehumanizing. For all its good things work culture is bullshit here. A lot of is is looking busy and paper shuffling. Id be very surprised if productivity is actually higher here than in Latin America, on a per worker /hourly basis.

So there is no real 'out' for most dudes, few for girls. One of them marrying a foreigner. the other is to drop out and hope for the best. It doesnt help that being an entrepreneur is seen as a dirty way of making money.

Ive been chatting with more people of my generation (35ish) and they all say that they would leave if they could. For most women if they are not married they are considered left behind, and for guys they are starting to make decent coin so no incentive to leave. Just take it up the ass and wait for that promotion. They know it but are powerless about it. Or so they think.

In other news, I think I might bail out of here. Much as I love J girls, Singapore is much better for business. Hell, even KL is cheaper and the locals way friendlier than asshole Kyotoites.

Post: #184

Well, Japan have been a good fun, I've experienced some crazy shit when I'm here. For all the stuffs I love about Japan, I always hate the idea of working for Japanese companies in Japan and their tatemae bullshit. And the negative energy is just overwhelming some times.

Post: #185

Last night I went out to an otsukiai dinner for a visiting dignitary from the US. Afterwards, on my own I went to a cocktail bar in the area I hadn't been to before. When I first walked in, I got the usual, "Who is this foreigner coming in here?" looks from the staff. After I sat down, however, and rapped in Japanese for awhile with the bartenders it was all good. In fact, after a couple of hours they brought the girl who worked there over to introduce her to me (unprompted) and started introducing me to the regular customers. I ended up going home way too late.

I know that we've been talking about in this thread that the Great White God is now dead in Tokyo or Kansai. That's not quite true. If you know how to get along in this country the people here will be fascinated by you because you have a different and fresh perspective on things. The problem is that young chicks won't appreciate it. The people who appreciate it are the older women and men. So, it doesn't really help the PUAs who focus on young women. It will help you if you're trying to live here and be a part of this society at large.

Post: #186

Yeah, young women are not terribly interested. I hate teaching English, but I've been doing lessons at an econ school (the pay is insanely good), and the boys are always more excited to see me than the girls. The girls often ask to take pictures with me, but I refuse. They're curious, but they're far too worried about their social standing to be romantically involved with a dirty foreigner.

They're much more receptive if you catch them slipping and there's no chance their friends will see. I caught a cute 19-year-old coming home from cherry blossom viewing in Gion a little while back and banged her within a couple hours. She put up very little resistance. She told me she wanted to go on a date the next week, but she never messaged me back. Saw her on campus and she turned chalk white. Dumb biatch.

I banged her as Benjamin. I wonder how it would have went with Skotch...

Post: #187

I did notice that about the lder people with some interactions, however, why not with the young? Is it the childish kawaii factor, something of the kind?

(04-16-2014 05:48 PM)Carlos100 Wrote:  Last night I went out to an otsukiai dinner for a visiting dignitary from the US. Afterwards, on my own I went to a cocktail bar in the area I hadn't been to before. When I first walked in, I got the usual, "Who is this foreigner coming in here?" looks from the staff. After I sat down, however, and rapped in Japanese for awhile with the bartenders it was all good. In fact, after a couple of hours they brought the girl who worked there over to introduce her to me (unprompted) and started introducing me to the regular customers. I ended up going home way too late.

I know that we've been talking about in this thread that the Great White God is now dead in Tokyo or Kansai. That's not quite true. If you know how to get along in this country the people here will be fascinated by you because you have a different and fresh perspective on things. The problem is that young chicks won't appreciate it. The people who appreciate it are the older women and men. So, it doesn't really help the PUAs who focus on young women. It will help you if you're trying to live here and be a part of this society at large.

Post: #188

(04-17-2014 09:49 AM)LEMONed IScream Wrote:  I did notice that about the lder people with some interactions, however, why not with the young? Is it the childish kawaii factor, something of the kind?

(04-16-2014 05:48 PM)Carlos100 Wrote:  Last night I went out to an otsukiai dinner for a visiting dignitary from the US. Afterwards, on my own I went to a cocktail bar in the area I hadn't been to before. When I first walked in, I got the usual, "Who is this foreigner coming in here?" looks from the staff. After I sat down, however, and rapped in Japanese for awhile with the bartenders it was all good. In fact, after a couple of hours they brought the girl who worked there over to introduce her to me (unprompted) and started introducing me to the regular customers. I ended up going home way too late.

I know that we've been talking about in this thread that the Great White God is now dead in Tokyo or Kansai. That's not quite true. If you know how to get along in this country the people here will be fascinated by you because you have a different and fresh perspective on things. The problem is that young chicks won't appreciate it. The people who appreciate it are the older women and men. So, it doesn't really help the PUAs who focus on young women. It will help you if you're trying to live here and be a part of this society at large.

I guess young peoples' priorities are different. I've never had a Japanese guy over the age of 25 ask me if I think he would look good with orange hair. I have gotten plenty of questions like that from younger men and women. If it ever comes into style again for a Japanese girl to have a foreigner on her arm, they will all be racing each other to the American military base gates and English schools to grab themselves one.

Post: #189

I'm going to be taking a couple semesters of Japanese next year to qualify for a study abroad trip in the fall of 2015. Could you guys possibly elaborate on Japanese Universities and what life may be as an exchange student?

Post: #190

does anyone know where I can find last minute monthly apartment rentals in Tokyo? (no contract). I want to go back to Tokyo in May and stay for 2 months. Trying to find a place close to either Shibuya or Shinjuku station.

Post: #191

Sakura House is pretty well known. The short term rentals tend to be much worse value though so bear this in mind.

Maybe check out AirBnB too.

Post: #192

(04-20-2014 12:48 PM)xpatplayer Wrote:  I'm going to be taking a couple semesters of Japanese next year to qualify for a study abroad trip in the fall of 2015. Could you guys possibly elaborate on Japanese Universities and what life may be as an exchange student?

It's still quite a ways off, but I think you're gonna have a blast, man. Japanese university is so easy its a joke. It's so fucking stupid that it's actually hard to wrap your head around at first. Japanese university students don't do anything. At all. They just show up around lunch time, hang out with their friends, maybe attend a class or two, and then go to their intramural sport or club activity. It's basically a summer camp where they can play and learn to be good little Japanese robot-people until they're old enough for a big corporation to scoop them up like a claw machine and dump them into a soul-raping, low paying job that they'll neglect their kids for.



As for picking up hoez, I think you could clear 10+ notches in a semester if you put in work. However... I'd recommend playing the long game and going for quality instead of quantity (you can always supplement your numbers with girls from outside of school). Social circle is king here, and I think the top-shelf girls at uni need to be sat on for a bit and warmed up. If you take your time and work your way in, you can gain access to quality product you'd have to fight 400 thirsty betas for in America.

For this, I think you should join a school club or two. Foreign students typically start classes well before the Japanese kids, but when the bright-eyed 1st years finally do show up, the whole school will fucking explode into a club recruiting fair. The event typically lasts a few days with shitty hand-painted signs, shitty food and drink, and shitty parties in the evening. Use this as an opportunity to meet people and find a social circle you can tolerate. I personally think this is one of the better ways to find J-friends who aren't foreigner-loving fags (though a lot of regular clubs will turn you away or try to make you really uncomfortable...I've had a few bad experiences with basketball kids).



For learning Japanese, studying the Kanji first is absolutely the best thing you can do. Hand to God, Kanji is the shit. If you don't believe me, watch the Chinese kids smash the higher level classes without even trying. I pounded out 3000-something Kanji in 6 weeks, and then started reading books and watching movies. In the States it can be hard to come by good stuff to watch, but here you can get a membership to a video store and get any movie you like in Japanese. I wouldn't advise watching Japanese movies or TV shows, though... Jesus they fucking suck.

Your Japanese language classes will likely come in handy for grammar, but most of the vocab and set phrases you learn will be virtually unusable.



If you have some more specific questions, I'm sure any of us would be happy to answer.

Post: #193

Thanks for the tip on Sakura house. I actually just had my friend book a place for me through a Japanese website. Japan is so difficult for foreigners.. This apartment would have been impossible without an inside connection, and getting a visitor SIM card is a pain in the ass. I'll be staying by Shinjuku station until the end of May. The plan is to day game like a machine. I'm extremely pumped. Time to start brushing up on my Japanese...

Post: #194

(04-23-2014 07:04 AM)Skotch Wrote:  For learning Japanese, studying the Kanji first is absolutely the best thing you can do. Hand to God, Kanji is the shit. If you don't believe me, watch the Chinese kids smash the higher level classes without even trying. I pounded out 3000-something Kanji in 6 weeks, and then started reading books and watching movies.

Maybe if you aren't in Japan yet.

The best advice I have heard for Asian languages is to make speaking your hare and reading your turtle.

Kanji are just a tool for reading Japanese. A means to an end. There are way too many kanji otaku out there who can barely hold a conversation. Really, most guys would be better off watching trashy Japanese TV and trying to get the gist of it before attempting to "learn" all 3000 kanji.

You don't know a kanji until you can understand the vocabulary that goes with it and its context. Even then, there are a ridiculous number of irregular readings that you just have to pick up. The grammar, endless inflections and contextual vocabulary of Japanese are much harder in my experience. Kanji are overrated.

Yes, kanji can help you learn vocabulary to an extent, but you'd be better off learning the vocab for each kanji as you come across them. This can only come from input and experience.

Maybe it worked for you, but I did the Heisig method on several occasions, as did some of my friends, and we all concluded that our time would have been better spent actually learning Japanese.

To learn Japanese, I recommend learning vocabulary and grammar above all else. Pick up the "Bible" http://www.amazon.com/Dictionary-Basic-J...4789004546 and get stuck in.

Just my two cents.

Post: #195

(04-24-2014 07:54 PM)dreambig Wrote:  

(04-23-2014 07:04 AM)Skotch Wrote:  For learning Japanese, studying the Kanji first is absolutely the best thing you can do. Hand to God, Kanji is the shit. If you don't believe me, watch the Chinese kids smash the higher level classes without even trying. I pounded out 3000-something Kanji in 6 weeks, and then started reading books and watching movies.

Maybe if you aren't in Japan yet.

The best advice I have heard for Asian languages is to make speaking your hare and reading your turtle.

Kanji are just a tool for reading Japanese. A means to an end. There are way too many kanji otaku out there who can barely hold a conversation. Really, most guys would be better off watching trashy Japanese TV and trying to get the gist of it before attempting to "learn" all 3000 kanji.

You don't know a kanji until you can understand the vocabulary that goes with it and its context. Even then, there are a ridiculous number of irregular readings that you just have to pick up. The grammar, endless inflections and contextual vocabulary of Japanese are much harder in my experience. Kanji are overrated.

Yes, kanji can help you learn vocabulary to an extent, but you'd be better off learning the vocab for each kanji as you come across them. This can only come from input and experience.

Maybe it worked for you, but I did the Heisig method on several occasions, as did some of my friends, and we all concluded that our time would have been better spent actually learning Japanese.

To learn Japanese, I recommend learning vocabulary and grammar above all else. Pick up the "Bible" http://www.amazon.com/Dictionary-Basic-J...4789004546 and get stuck in.

Just my two cents.

I've gotten the same contradictory pieces of advice from non-Japanese who have learned Japanese well. Some of have told me to start out with kanji, others have told me that it's better to learn how to speak it first. I think it depends on your personality and situation.

For me, I've found it better to go with what dreambig suggests. I have been working on conversational skills and I'm improving faster than I was when I was trying to focus on kanji. I do recommend that anyone coming to Japan memorize the Katakana and Hiragana as that shouldn't take too long. If you want to learn Japanese really well, however, you will eventually need to tackle the Kanji beast.

Post: #196

The way I did it, and how I got decent at Japanese was to:
1) pick up girls using all Japanese
2) study books
3) study nanpa blogs (there's a ton of them, google ナンパブログ)

The benefit of studying nanpa blogs is that you will come off as more natural sounding and not "textbook." You'll learn some funny stuff and some useful slang that will get you more points when talking and carrying a conversation in Japanese.

Kanji and all that shit is good, trust me you will get lots of practice once your LINE app starts filling up with kanji messages from j-girls.
It becomes a feedback-loop of never ending Japanese, but its good for you.
It's a figure-it-out-as-you-go approach.

Soon you'll have at least one girl hanging off you - who doesn't speak any English, thus increasing your Japanese and pussy getting skills even more.

Post: #197

The Kanji first method won't pay immediate dividends like the conversation first method will, but you'll reach an advanced level far faster with the former.

Japanese is built up of Chinese(ish) words and purely Japanese words. The Chinese words (obviously) derive their meaning and pronunciation from the Kanji, but the vast majority of purely Japanese words also have a Kanji assigned to them. When you know the Kanji, you understand the meaning and nuance of words better. If we were to look to one of my famously terrible analogies, the conversation first method in Japanese is like going into the kitchen and trying to master French pastries before learning the basics of baking.

I guess it boils down to your goals. You're spending a year getting ready for this program, so I imagine you're rather invested in living in Japan. If so, hit those Kanji books now and get that shit out of the way.


Edit: Although... memcpy's not wrong. I think I learned more Japanese from messaging and Facebook chatting with hoez (I hate fucking LINE) than I did from any other source. Nanpa blogs are fun, but that's a monster undertaking for even an intermediate speaker.

Post: #198

I went to R2 in Roppongi last night (Review). Since Heartland at Roppongi Hills closed, R2 has apparently taken its place as the main meat market for affluent yuppies in Roppongi. I went with a Nisei-Japanese, game aware friend who resides in Roppongi and goes to R2 often. He said he has often pulled from R2 and the club Feria, located across the alley from R2.

Based on my observations, R2 is definitely a meat market. Everyone there seemed to understand that. The large crowd was mostly non-Japanese. Even the Japanese present responded in English even if we greeted them in Japanese. All the girls we approached responded in a friendly manner, but kept checking their I-phones and usually rushed off before giving their number. The ratio was about 70/30 men/women, although it improved after midnight when more women came in. For some reason, however, many of the men weren't actively trying to approach women. Instead, they stood around in groups talking to their friends. There was no line when I entered about 11 p.m., but there was a long line when I left about 1:30 a.m. The staff and many of the customers did seem to have a little of a poncey attitude.

The music was a little too loud to have a comfortable conversation. And, it was a little too dark to be able to easily tell how attractive the people present actually were. The girls seemed to be mostly 7s and 8s. One conversation in particular I remember was with a tall, leggy Taiwanese model. The drinks and food were overpriced, but good. The cocktails were large and strong. Having a wingmen did seem to help make approaches easier. Standing near the bathroom entrances was a good place to talk to women when they came by to go to the bathroom. The music was a little quieter in that area and it was a little less crowded.

Based on what my friend said, and what I observed, R2 appears to be a good place for game aware visitors to find some fairly high quality women from all over the world.

Post: #199

(04-27-2014 07:30 AM)Carlos100 Wrote:  R2 appears to be a good place for game aware visitors to find some fairly high quality gold diggers and semi-pros from all over the world.

Corrected for you.

Post: #200

(04-27-2014 08:02 PM)dreambig Wrote:  

(04-27-2014 07:30 AM)Carlos100 Wrote:  R2 appears to be a good place for game aware visitors to find some fairly high quality gold diggers and semi-pros from all over the world.

Corrected for you.

. One thing I forgot to mention is that there was no cover and the staff was so busy that they didn't appear to notice if you bought a drink or not. So, it looks like you can go in there and mingle around as long as you want to on a Friday or Saturday night without spending a dime if you don't feel like paying the inflated prices.