(09-04-2017 02:33 PM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  Day 2 again after a relapse. I'm finding that there are several instances of what causes a relapse in my particular case. I'm posting them below so that hopefully others can be aware of what might cause you to relapse as well.

1. Facebook. Too many attractive female friends who post pics of their skimpy outfits. Huge temptation to download and fap to those images, given that you know these girls in real life.

Solution: I deleted all images of them that are skimpy from my phone, and spend a lot less time on facebook these days. Most of the time it is just nonsense.

2. Not having a regular sleep/work schedule increases the chance of relapse.

I set my own hours, which is a bad thing at times when you go to bed late. The later I stay awake, the more likely I am tempted to watch porn. Sometimes you just want a release before you go to bed, but watching electronic screens with simulated sex isn't what our bodies were designed for.

Solution: I set alarms that repeat on my phone each evening to get off the computer by an earlier time, several hours before bedtime. I increase my reading time or other quiet activities to settle the mind down.

3. I workout regularly and feel less temptation to watch porn because exercise pumps you up, and fapping takes your mental and physical strength away.

Solution: Make exercise a priority, set a schedule and stick to it.

4. Keep a daily journal. Document your number of days of nofap, as it can be encouraging to see that number grow instead of just posting in this thread when you've relapsed.

If you have any other ideas for longevity of nofap, I'm all ears.

Good stuff. The only thing I would add is just don't touch. One thing leds to another.

Listened to a podcast today that I think those in this thread might find interesting and useful. It talks about the effects of porn on the body from a scientific perspective. For myself, I have found that reading about the health benefits of eating healthy food and doing IF has helped me stay the course at times when I would have cheated in the past and so think maybe something like this may provide a similar result for those looking to do the same in this area.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhqx7yctQVk

Sooo I relapsed a bunch.

Tomorrow morning will mark....1 successful day of no-fap and no-porn.

This road is long and hard. Intermittently.

G

I'm back on the wagon. Day 5 now.

I've decided to take up smoking again. Anytime I feel the urge, I go out for a smoke. Obviously not the healthiest replacement hobby, but it is quick and offers instant gratification.

It's been quite effective, though granted it's only been a few days.

Perhaps a year from now I will be beating off anytime I feel like smoking, in order to quit. We'll see what happens

Day 6!

I've found this "panic button" on reddit to help people who are about to relapse:

Quote:1. Take your fucking hand out of your pants right now. Touch yourself again before reading all of this and you're a fucking failure.
2. Get rid of that big mofo down below. Hold your breath, flex your quads, whatever its takes.
3. Play your favourite song.
4. Take 10 deep breaths and relax, then repeat after me 10 times:
"I do not edge, I do not masturbate, I do not watch porn. I am stronger than this. I WILL ABSTAIN FROM PMO."

Now that you're thinking clearly, keep the following in mind. You can stop whenever you think you're ready.
Your brain will try to rationalise anything to get what it wants. ANYTHING. This isn't you, your brain wants dopamine. You are more than that though, you are more than chemicals and hormones, you are mind over matter. Prove you have the self control, prove your better than this.
If you give up, you're giving up everything. The ADHD, procrastination, depression and social anxiety will return.
You're giving up your chances with that girl you like, your increased energy levels, your deeper voice, your confidence, your work ethic, your habits, your willpower, your clear skin, your self respect, your appreciation of life, your happiness.

If you fap you're just becoming numb, non-existent. Why on earth would you waste another second PMOing when you could be out experiencing life, connecting with the ones you love, learning, travelling, bettering yourself, building something meaningful, living your life.

Now close this, go out there and experience life.
Still reading? Start again from the start.
Still want to fap?

Take a good look at yourself in the mirror. If you truly want to throw away your life for a quick dopamine rush and a lifetime of regret, be my guest. You're pathetic.
Prove to me otherwise.

It's a little extreme. But appears to be written for those who are having real sexual issues rather than doing this for side benefit or challenge. Useful, nonetheless.

I don't know if anyone here feels this way, but I currently can not see any real benefit for myself, for not fapping.

When I have ED I think its nervousness, and my own natural protection mechanism against women I shouldn't mess with anyway. There are some women I struggle at first with to get it up with, and others that I am practically busting a nut on before I get it out of my pants.

I'm naturally a high energy, aggressive guy, and have been my whole life. I workout a lot with intense exercise(HIIT, Crossfit, etc). I keep it under control with meditation and a strong self-oriented approach to people in general, I just generally withdraw from people if I need to. I physically remove myself from situations of randomness with other people, like clubs and random bar bullshit that always pops up.

I tend to over think, over react, over emote, etc. Fapping calms me down, and helps me go to sleep. I got to 5 days in a row once of no fapp, and its like my body completely shut down. I didnt feel right.

I suffer from ADD. Maybe not fapping could help with that? I dont know. I do however think that fapping too much is bad(more than 2x p day), and that excessive porn use is as well. I dont mind dropping porn, and get more excited with a plate sends nudes, than when I find one online.

Just random thoughts.

The sleeping wake state of the morn and combined morning wood, it's like I half consciously am thinking about sex no matter what; that's the toughest part. Especially when it's been weeks.

(09-11-2017 04:19 PM)Kid Twist Wrote:  The sleeping wake state of the morn and combined morning wood, it's like I half consciously am thinking about sex no matter what; that's the toughest part. Especially when it's been weeks.

Yes, those half conscious moments are really tempting, thats when I usually jerk off lol. Its crazy tho since it feels like a dream since im not 100% conscious.

Id like to contribute to this thread as I am currently on my 7th Day of noFap unplanned but now I plan to continue.

I have been Red Stag hunting for the last week with some men and sleeping in the same room so it was not appropriate to fap.

After the hunt I have been around some women that seemed to be eyeballing me and I just felt like I was abnormally attractive to them...completely subjective .

My voice seems deeper.

I think clearer and more motivated.

When I fall asleep I sleep more deeply.

I plan to continue abstaining for the balance of september and will report back on my findings

7 days in for me after probably the 100th reset in the last year. Passed a big test yesterday in that I had some time alone on the computer and I can't remember how ended up looking at porn. Normally this would be a one way street to fapping. However, I was able to realise what was going on stop, shut down the browser and turn the machine off. That's progress.

Day 35. I feel great, especially considering the place in life I am currently in (finishing college and working on it 120%).

Vaun, you are on to something. I'm not add or hyper at all, but I think there is a level of either attraction, comfort, or all of the above when dealing with any random girl. That's why random is bad for a healthy person, there's no lead up or comfort to link your brain and body in a harmonious way to the pursued (girl). I know a lot of people can do it, but that doesn't mean it's the natural way to go at it or practice at. The rest of the details are just an aside, and clearly singular routines (web surfing in general, dating apps, porn etc) that one associates with sexual things just make it all worse --- but they are still just details. I think it's that the natural life of social interaction and normal courting is a thing of the past and this is all a symptom of that being lost, in many ways. If you like the person, your body will respond. If you are just looking at it from a purely, boner get to gettin! aspect, she has to basically be an 7-8 or its ... maybe not, dude. More later.

Day 10. Having some difficulty sleeping over the past couple of days-- usually I beat off right before bed. I'm reading Orwell's 1984 to replace that habit. Hopefully there are no pornographic scenes in the book

(09-14-2017 07:10 AM)Lucky Wrote:  Day 10. Having some difficulty sleeping over the past couple of days-- usually I beat off right before bed. I'm reading Orwell's 1984 to replace that habit. Hopefully there are no pornographic scenes in the book

There are erotic and sex scenes in that story.
Pick another book.
Want to fall asleep ?...use a religious book.

Excluding sex with women, I stayed on the bandwagon for 6 months. What helped for me was a cluster of factors, all of which were greater than the sum of the parts:

1) exercise & diet - built discipline by cutting out 80% of sugar from my diet and eating healthily, while doing crossfit 4 times a week.

2) date actively - because of the diet & exercise my testosterone went up and i was even hornier than normal. Used the extra energy to do game and date/fuck women.

3) device avoidance - since it's no longer the 90s and no one beats off to smut rags, it makes sense that the less time you spend on your laptop/desktop/phone/tablet the less temptation to beat off. If you need to use your devices, use them in a public place.

4) space avoidance - if you're the type who will rub one out while in private, then avoid being in your room/study unless absolutely necessary. Same point as 3, but with whackoff locations.

5) stay fully clothed - the more articles of clothing you have, the more barriers to beating off.

(09-14-2017 07:15 AM)Mercenary Wrote:  

(09-14-2017 07:10 AM)Lucky Wrote:  Day 10. Having some difficulty sleeping over the past couple of days-- usually I beat off right before bed. I'm reading Orwell's 1984 to replace that habit. Hopefully there are no pornographic scenes in the book

There are erotic and sex scenes in that story.
Pick another book.
Want to fall asleep ?...use a religious book.

Here's some ways to sleep better:

1. Go bed earlier. Like 10pm early. Wake up at 6am. Do this for about a month and you'll get better sleep and be more productive. Set an alarm to wake up early, but also set an alarm TO GO TO BED EARLY SO YOU STAY ON TRACK. Always try to go to bed and wake up at the same time to put your body in a proper cycle, even on off days from work.
2. Take a little bit of magnesium before bedtime. You can buy capsules online, or there's even a magnesium oil that you can spray on your skin to absorb transdermally. Works great as a sleep aid.
3. Avoid eating big meals at night, especially anything that has simple sugars that make you hyper.
4. Turn off the TV, cell phone and any electronic screens a full two hours before bed.
5. Read and pray before bedtime if you're religious. Best to focus the mind on something more meditative than exciting like videogames/porn/tv ust before bedtime.

(09-16-2017 12:58 PM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  

(09-14-2017 07:15 AM)Mercenary Wrote:  

(09-14-2017 07:10 AM)Lucky Wrote:  Day 10. Having some difficulty sleeping over the past couple of days-- usually I beat off right before bed. I'm reading Orwell's 1984 to replace that habit. Hopefully there are no pornographic scenes in the book

There are erotic and sex scenes in that story.
Pick another book.
Want to fall asleep ?...use a religious book.

Here's some ways to sleep better:

1. Go bed earlier. Like 10pm early. Wake up at 6am. Do this for about a month and you'll get better sleep and be more productive. Set an alarm to wake up early, but also set an alarm TO GO TO BED EARLY SO YOU STAY ON TRACK. Always try to go to bed and wake up at the same time to put your body in a proper cycle, even on off days from work.
2. Take a little bit of magnesium before bedtime. You can buy capsules online, or there's even a magnesium oil that you can spray on your skin to absorb transdermally. Works great as a sleep aid.
3. Avoid eating big meals at night, especially anything that has simple sugars that make you hyper.
4. Turn off the TV, cell phone and any electronic screens a full two hours before bed.
5. Read and pray before bedtime if you're religious. Best to focus the mind on something more meditative than exciting like videogames/porn/tv ust before bedtime.

Don't forget Bright Light Therapy for Regularizing Sleep and Reducing Depression and Anxiety

(09-04-2017 04:14 PM)Ringo Wrote:  

(09-04-2017 03:54 PM)redbeard Wrote:  Bingo.

You could also try this new thing called "telling the fucking truth."

"Yeah I don't jack off, so I come really fast if I haven't had sex in a while. We can keep going though."

Fix a drink
Keep your clothes off
Rub her back
Eat her pussy
and wait for your cock to bounce back.

Sex doesn't end when you cum.

Personally I don't like telling them I don't jack off.

I've straight up told a girl about it once but it brought up a subject I didn't want to discuss with her: "So if you don't masturbate, when was the last time you came?", which quickly lead to "Who did you have sex with? When was it?".

It's not like I'm lying about it - if they ask, I'll tell them. I just don't volunteer the information.

If you insist on answering...

"About a month ago."

"I had a girlfriend in xyz town."

No problems there.

(09-10-2017 09:59 AM)Vaun Wrote:  I don't know if anyone here feels this way, but I currently can not see any real benefit for myself, for not fapping.

When I have ED I think its nervousness, and my own natural protection mechanism against women I shouldn't mess with anyway. There are some women I struggle at first with to get it up with, and others that I am practically busting a nut on before I get it out of my pants.

I'm naturally a high energy, aggressive guy, and have been my whole life. I workout a lot with intense exercise(HIIT, Crossfit, etc). I keep it under control with meditation and a strong self-oriented approach to people in general, I just generally withdraw from people if I need to. I physically remove myself from situations of randomness with other people, like clubs and random bar bullshit that always pops up.

I tend to over think, over react, over emote, etc. Fapping calms me down, and helps me go to sleep. I got to 5 days in a row once of no fapp, and its like my body completely shut down. I didnt feel right.

I suffer from ADD. Maybe not fapping could help with that? I dont know. I do however think that fapping too much is bad(more than 2x p day), and that excessive porn use is as well. I dont mind dropping porn, and get more excited with a plate sends nudes, than when I find one online.

Just random thoughts.

Have you gone more than 5 days?

Are you still fucking girls?

(09-17-2017 12:05 AM)redbeard Wrote:  Have you gone more than 5 days?

Are you still fucking girls?

I can't remember when I have gone more than five days, in my entire life. I regularly have sex with my current plates.

(09-17-2017 10:28 AM)Vaun Wrote:  

(09-17-2017 12:05 AM)redbeard Wrote:  Have you gone more than 5 days?

Are you still fucking girls?

I can't remember when I have gone more than five days, in my entire life. I regularly have sex with my current plates.

You're hitting flatline. I suggest a 30 day reboot.

Coming up on 2 weeks now. Did edge a little bit this morning but stopped. No real desire to watch porn anymore. Didn't install a blocker or anything. I don't really think of it. That might be the best strategy since I tried counting the days before and it just made me think of it more.

^
Very similar to myself. I still read some erotic fiction from time to time but I do not have the desire to act upon the urges. Just something to do while you're bored. Be warned however, it can be a slippery slope.

Thanks to all you guys who post your successes and failures. I have good days and bad days and have seen some improvement. I start to really feel desire on the third day and have a lot of game improvement to do before I can start to meet my desire without this. Seeing your stories and tips helps a lot, even though I know this journey will be tough.

One thing that has helped is simply not being in a place where I'm tempted. Knowing my weaknesses helps.

Repping many of you who post.

I've been on NoFap for about a year and a half now and it's honestly been one of the most transformative periods of my life.

I had always been afraid of rawdogging girls because of the amount of precum I produced, so I rarely did it with girls unless we were in an LTR and I knew for a fact that she was on birth control (it is possible to impregnate a chick with precum, contrary to popular belief, and with the amount I produced I wasn't risking it). A year ago I read a post on another forum about a guy who reduced his amount of precum by abstaining from masturbation (his theory was that excessive masturbation leads to weaker PC muscles) so I decided to try it. I did that for about 10 months while doing reverse kegels sporadically.

A few weeks ago I noticed while making out with a girl that I produced very little precum, which was a big step up from my previous state (in which my boxers would have been soaked). I'm not sure if it can be attributed to the reverse kegels, not masturbating, or both, but I doubt it's from the reverse kegels because I only did it every other month. Whatever the cause, I love the results.

I think of NoFap akin to Pascal's wager: much to gain, very little to lose.