Ok here's a good one. Messaging a girl online. Dresses like a goth/emo with a profile full of bubbly shit about how she likes cats and anime.

Me: Aren't you a little bubbly for a goth?

Her: Probably.


Wow, don't blow me away too quick with your conversational skills. Maybe that's what I should reply with?

I think the better question is, why are you wasting your time messaging a girl like that?

Practice makes perfect. Plus WB.

Hey, I need some feedback on this one guys, would appreciate it.

Backdrop: Met her once(tuesday), successful date in the sense of lots of making out in a sexual way. Texted here a couple of days(thursday) later, agreed to have her over to watch some Animal Planet (inside joke) together on sunday. I followed up on sunday and proposed an exact time, she flaked with being sick. Tried to call her on the bs, but nothing too harsh.

Reopened yesterday, (almost two weeks since first meeting). Texting a bit back and forth, suggested a new meet and got this one:

"Haha sure, why not I´m kinda seeing someone, but as long as you don´t expect any kissing we should be fine "

Really not sure here, my take on it is that why else would she want to meet me to be just friends. I think she´s just justifying to herself that she let´s me know, and in "worst case" scenario if anything happens. It will be my fault, and not hers. What do you guys think? What to text and what do you think she wants/expect?

Appreciate any comments

Guys this is my first bit of online messaging after 10 year marriage separation, so just finding my feet.
Gauging escalation (text and physical) is where I see myself being a bit unsure.

Anyway, crushed with a girl on Happn that had 5 pics of herself and one random one of a stalagtite type cave.

Me opening: And you looked like such a normal girl until that last pic of your scary bedroom!

Her: You didnt like it?
Her: Its a cave in penshurst Hill.

Me: You live in a cave?!
Me: Iv had bad experiences with cavewomen before.

Her: Yea I do! Haha

Me: Great on the physical stuff but when things don't go their way...

Me: Anyway, you have a nice name, where's it from?




It's only been half hour but reading it back think I started Ok but took the cave thing too far and then went boring/niceguy at the end.

Any suggestions/improvements/alternatives appreciated.

Edit - She just came back with: I went to this place one month ago, it's a nice cave. Thanks - I'm brazilian but my name origin is spanish. How are you?

Lately, I have not had any trouble asking for and getting phone numbers. But, half the time, they don't respond to my initial "great to meet you" text. What's a normal response rate? If I get a response half the time, am I above average?

(10-05-2015 10:32 AM)UroboricForms Wrote:  Me: So you want to hang out soon?

Her: Will you be nice?


What's the appropriate response here? I'm not sure whether to go "actually I was planning on being a jerk" or some variation thereof, or something more "innocent". Already been sexual in the messaging so far.

Her: Will you be nice?

You; Definitely not

If you've already sexualized the exchange, and she's still engaged why back off? You've got her attention now you need to ratchet up the tingles...else she'll get bored and you know what happens then....

(10-07-2015 02:00 PM)SuperBock Wrote:  Guys this is my first bit of online messaging after 10 year marriage separation, so just finding my feet.
Gauging escalation (text and physical) is where I see myself being a bit unsure.

Anyway, crushed with a girl on Happn that had 5 pics of herself and one random one of a stalagtite type cave.

Me opening: And you looked like such a normal girl until that last pic of your scary bedroom!

Her: You didnt like it?
Her: Its a cave in penshurst Hill.

Me: You live in a cave?!
Me: Iv had bad experiences with cavewomen before.

Her: Yea I do! Haha

Me: Great on the physical stuff but when things don't go their way...

Me: Anyway, you have a nice name, where's it from?

It's only been half hour but reading it back think I started Ok but took the cave thing too far and then went boring/niceguy at the end.

Any suggestions/improvements/alternatives appreciated.

Edit - She just came back with: I went to this place one month ago, it's a nice cave. Thanks - I'm brazilian but my name origin is spanish. How are you?

Yeah, the cavewomen thing went way too far. You also DLV'ed by mentioning physical stuff as you come off tryhard and maybe you meant to insinuate that women pursued you physically, but I don't think it comes off that way. However, she's still talking to you.

You: Muito obrigado. I'm great [insert a short description of something cool you're doing/just did, but only if you can make it sound interesting in a short phrase]. What was the last costume you wore?

You could also just say, "ready for halloween?" instead of asking about the last costume she wore and segue way from that.

I'm not really in your situation and I imagine this lady is a bit older than I date, so I'm looking to sexualize without being too aggressive and keeping with that theme. Saying Muito obrigado is maybe a chance (whether she knows Portuguese or not) but I think it could work well for you.

The biggest thing is that you want to either flirt/joke around and ultimately sexualize without seeming tryhard. Moving quickly towards getting together and getting a number to sort the logistics is your objective.

(10-07-2015 01:06 PM)Andre Wrote:  Hey, I need some feedback on this one guys, would appreciate it.

Backdrop: Met her once(tuesday), successful date in the sense of lots of making out in a sexual way. Texted here a couple of days(thursday) later, agreed to have her over to watch some Animal Planet (inside joke) together on sunday. I followed up on sunday and proposed an exact time, she flaked with being sick. Tried to call her on the bs, but nothing too harsh.

Reopened yesterday, (almost two weeks since first meeting). Texting a bit back and forth, suggested a new meet and got this one:

"Haha sure, why not I´m kinda seeing someone, but as long as you don´t expect any kissing we should be fine "

Really not sure here, my take on it is that why else would she want to meet me to be just friends. I think she´s just justifying to herself that she let´s me know, and in "worst case" scenario if anything happens. It will be my fault, and not hers. What do you guys think? What to text and what do you think she wants/expect?

Appreciate any comments

"Haha sure, why not I´m kinda seeing someone, but as long as you don´t expect any kissing we should be fine "
"Yep. Im more of a biter, tbh"

Quote:Me: So you want to hang out soon?

Her: Will you be nice?

You: Birthday Cat emoji.

(10-07-2015 08:30 PM)AneroidOcean Wrote:  

(10-07-2015 02:00 PM)SuperBock Wrote:  Guys this is my first bit of online messaging after 10 year marriage separation, so just finding my feet.
Gauging escalation (text and physical) is where I see myself being a bit unsure.

Anyway, crushed with a girl on Happn that had 5 pics of herself and one random one of a stalagtite type cave.

Me opening: And you looked like such a normal girl until that last pic of your scary bedroom!

Her: You didnt like it?
Her: Its a cave in penshurst Hill.

Me: You live in a cave?!
Me: Iv had bad experiences with cavewomen before.

Her: Yea I do! Haha

Me: Great on the physical stuff but when things don't go their way...

Me: Anyway, you have a nice name, where's it from?

It's only been half hour but reading it back think I started Ok but took the cave thing too far and then went boring/niceguy at the end.

Any suggestions/improvements/alternatives appreciated.

Edit - She just came back with: I went to this place one month ago, it's a nice cave. Thanks - I'm brazilian but my name origin is spanish. How are you?

Yeah, the cavewomen thing went way too far. You also DLV'ed by mentioning physical stuff as you come off tryhard and maybe you meant to insinuate that women pursued you physically, but I don't think it comes off that way. However, she's still talking to you.

You: Muito obrigado. I'm great [insert a short description of something cool you're doing/just did, but only if you can make it sound interesting in a short phrase]. What was the last costume you wore?

You could also just say, "ready for halloween?" instead of asking about the last costume she wore and segue way from that.

I'm not really in your situation and I imagine this lady is a bit older than I date, so I'm looking to sexualize without being too aggressive and keeping with that theme. Saying Muito obrigado is maybe a chance (whether she knows Portuguese or not) but I think it could work well for you.

The biggest thing is that you want to either flirt/joke around and ultimately sexualize without seeming tryhard. Moving quickly towards getting together and getting a number to sort the logistics is your objective.

Thanks for the feedback.
I'm 35, this girl is 30 so not too old.

So it continued..

Her:I;m brazillian blah blah....How are you?

Me: I'm good thanks,How long you been in England? (Boring, I know!)

(2 Hours later)

Her: 8 years

Me: So, Eep Crood, Messging gets slow for both of us after a while huh! You fancy meeting up for a drink next week?

Her: What means Eep Crood?
Me: Google it
Her: Yes sure! Maybe we can chat a bit more?

Her: Funny!!!

Me: Goodnight

Her: If you think I look like Eep Crood why you want to meet up? ha ha

Me: ha ha, Relax, its the cave thing I never said you look like her...but now you mention it...

Her: I was joking with you, ha ha

Her: My hair looks like her hair ha ha

I went to sleep after this.
She still seems interested, at first I thought her "yes sure!" meant she was going to google it but this morning I think she meant yes to the drinks. Will soon find out.
I also spotted where I fell into her frame and appeased her slightly when she feigned offence over the Eep crood thing.

I'm not really bothered what happens at this stage but am enjoying the banter.

cheers

(10-07-2015 02:00 PM)SuperBock Wrote:  Thanks for the feedback.
I'm 35, this girl is 30 so not too old.

So it continued..

Her:I;m brazillian blah blah....How are you?

Me: I'm good thanks,How long you been in England? (Boring, I know!)

(2 Hours later)

Her: 8 years

Me: So, Eep Crood, Messging gets slow for both of us after a while huh! You fancy meeting up for a drink next week?

I don´t think you should go for the meetup after such a short response. I would build more comfort with continuing banter and chat. I like to just ask random questions if I feel the chat is dying down. For instance:
1. If you were stranded on an desert island and could bring any three things with you, what would you bring and why?

Usually she will have the approach of being a survivor with knife, tent and shit, then you can play on all kinds of stuff from robinson, castaway, survivor by destinys child, etc. Or she will say some personal items that she likes, then you just have to go with the flow. Typically she will also ask, what about you? Then I like to say "an infinite amount of wine, bongo drums, and you ". Never had a bad reaction from that one, but you have to feel how the conversation is going.

2. The two truths one lie game.

Anyways, I think you shouldn´t go for the meet based on her reply. Also, when you first go for the meet, there´s no problem in just saying we should grab a drink/let´s grab a drink sometime next week. Instead of asking her, just say that you should, take control of the conversation.

Her: What means Eep Crood?
Me: Google it
Her: Yes sure! Maybe we can chat a bit more?

Her: Funny!!!

Me: Goodnight

Her: If you think I look like Eep Crood why you want to meet up? ha ha

Me: ha ha, Relax, its the cave thing I never said you look like her...but now you mention it...

Her: I was joking with you, ha ha

Her: My hair looks like her hair ha ha

I went to sleep after this.
She still seems interested, at first I thought her "yes sure!" meant she was going to google it but this morning I think she meant yes to the drinks. Will soon find out.
I also spotted where I fell into her frame and appeased her slightly when she feigned offence over the Eep crood thing.

Just continue the banter in a flirty way, don´t fall into her frame, say sorry, or relax, calm down or anything like that. You could´ve just replied with your last part "I never said...."

I'm not really bothered what happens at this stage but am enjoying the banter.


cheers

That´s just my take on it though.

(10-08-2015 12:41 AM)SuperBock Wrote:  

(10-07-2015 08:30 PM)AneroidOcean Wrote:  

(10-07-2015 02:00 PM)SuperBock Wrote:  Guys this is my first bit of online messaging after 10 year marriage separation, so just finding my feet.
Gauging escalation (text and physical) is where I see myself being a bit unsure.

Anyway, crushed with a girl on Happn that had 5 pics of herself and one random one of a stalagtite type cave.

Me opening: And you looked like such a normal girl until that last pic of your scary bedroom!

Her: You didnt like it?
Her: Its a cave in penshurst Hill.

Me: You live in a cave?!
Me: Iv had bad experiences with cavewomen before.

Her: Yea I do! Haha

Me: Great on the physical stuff but when things don't go their way...

Me: Anyway, you have a nice name, where's it from?

It's only been half hour but reading it back think I started Ok but took the cave thing too far and then went boring/niceguy at the end.

Any suggestions/improvements/alternatives appreciated.

Edit - She just came back with: I went to this place one month ago, it's a nice cave. Thanks - I'm brazilian but my name origin is spanish. How are you?

Yeah, the cavewomen thing went way too far. You also DLV'ed by mentioning physical stuff as you come off tryhard and maybe you meant to insinuate that women pursued you physically, but I don't think it comes off that way. However, she's still talking to you.

You: Muito obrigado. I'm great [insert a short description of something cool you're doing/just did, but only if you can make it sound interesting in a short phrase]. What was the last costume you wore?

You could also just say, "ready for halloween?" instead of asking about the last costume she wore and segue way from that.

I'm not really in your situation and I imagine this lady is a bit older than I date, so I'm looking to sexualize without being too aggressive and keeping with that theme. Saying Muito obrigado is maybe a chance (whether she knows Portuguese or not) but I think it could work well for you.

The biggest thing is that you want to either flirt/joke around and ultimately sexualize without seeming tryhard. Moving quickly towards getting together and getting a number to sort the logistics is your objective.

Thanks for the feedback.
I'm 35, this girl is 30 so not too old.

So it continued..

Her:I;m brazillian blah blah....How are you?

Me: I'm good thanks,How long you been in England? (Boring, I know!)

(2 Hours later)

Her: 8 years

Me: So, Eep Crood, Messging gets slow for both of us after a while huh! You fancy meeting up for a drink next week?

Her: What means Eep Crood?
Me: Google it
Her: Yes sure! Maybe we can chat a bit more?

Her: Funny!!!

Me: Goodnight

Her: If you think I look like Eep Crood why you want to meet up? ha ha

Me: ha ha, Relax, its the cave thing I never said you look like her...but now you mention it...

Her: I was joking with you, ha ha

Her: My hair looks like her hair ha ha

I went to sleep after this.
She still seems interested, at first I thought her "yes sure!" meant she was going to google it but this morning I think she meant yes to the drinks. Will soon find out.
I also spotted where I fell into her frame and appeased her slightly when she feigned offence over the Eep crood thing.

I'm not really bothered what happens at this stage but am enjoying the banter.

cheers

I actually think you did better, eep crood was a great transition away from the cavewoman thing because it keeps it playful. Set up the meet, get the digits, and get in person. Be mindful of the length of your texts and consider getting her on the phone.

(10-08-2015 12:41 AM)SuperBock Wrote:  Thanks for the feedback.
I'm 35, this girl is 30 so not too old.

So it continued..

Her:I;m brazillian blah blah....How are you?

Me: I'm good thanks,How long you been in England? (Boring, I know!)

(2 Hours later)

Her: 8 years

Me: So, Eep Crood, Messging gets slow for both of us after a while huh! You fancy meeting up for a drink next week?

Her: What means Eep Crood?
Me: Google it
Her: Yes sure! Maybe we can chat a bit more?

Her: Funny!!!

Me: Goodnight

Her: If you think I look like Eep Crood why you want to meet up? ha ha

Me: ha ha, Relax, its the cave thing I never said you look like her...but now you mention it...

Her: I was joking with you, ha ha

Her: My hair looks like her hair ha ha

I went to sleep after this.
She still seems interested, at first I thought her "yes sure!" meant she was going to google it but this morning I think she meant yes to the drinks. Will soon find out.
I also spotted where I fell into her frame and appeased her slightly when she feigned offence over the Eep crood thing.

I'm not really bothered what happens at this stage but am enjoying the banter.

cheers

I actually think you did better, eep crood was a great transition away from the cavewoman thing because it keeps it playful. Set up the meet, get the digits, and get in person. Be mindful of the length of your texts and consider getting her on the phone.

Also, you should work your way down to mid 20s.

(10-08-2015 12:41 AM)SuperBock Wrote:  Thanks for the feedback.
I'm 35, this girl is 30 so not too old.

EDIT^^^^AO beat me to it

30 in chick years is like 50 in guy years. Not for nothing bro but at 35 you should be hitting up the 20-27 yo's. With proper game even the 18-20's are well within your reach. You are at peak versatility age for guys. Hitting the young stuff only gets harder (still doable...but harder)

Got a date with a chick a few years older than me (but an 8)
I reschedule and this is her response
"Sorry Mr Finish. I'm flattered...Your such a good looking man. I'm thinking the age difference might be a bit extreme? I truly am flattered, your are very handsome."

(10-08-2015 04:11 PM)Mr Finish Wrote:  Got a date with a chick a few years older than me (but an 8)
I reschedule and this is her response
"Sorry Mr Finish. I'm flattered...Your such a good looking man. I'm thinking the age difference might be a bit extreme? I truly am flattered, your are very handsome."

^ "LOL the last girl I dated was older than you. I know an amazing place...do you like sushi ( or if just drinks "do you like white wine?") "

(10-08-2015 04:21 PM)robreke Wrote:  

(10-08-2015 04:11 PM)Mr Finish Wrote:  Got a date with a chick a few years older than me (but an 8)
I reschedule and this is her response
"Sorry Mr Finish. I'm flattered...Your such a good looking man. I'm thinking the age difference might be a bit extreme? I truly am flattered, your are very handsome."

^ "LOL the last girl I dated was older than you. I know an amazing place...do you like sushi ( or if just drinks "do you like white wine?") "

I wouldn't do the "lol" part, assuming Mr Finish is over 30.

I also would say the last girl you dated was younger, not older.

Finally, I'd ask her if she's ever had a particular white wine or a particular type of food. It subtly implies that you're experienced/wordly in a way she can enjoy.

I ended up saying

" hah the last woman I was seeing was your age. Do you like red wine?"

She's coming over this weekemd, thanks guys.

I'm 22

Thanks for the feedback guys, much appreciated.
Here is my next one from tonight on tinder. I thought I did well to recover interest from a shaky start but adversarial tone then made it difficult to escalate sexually.

That conversation looked so boring and there was no call to action(getting her phone number). You basically just fed the attention whore taking about noticing she only takes selfies with her left sides. You didn't make yourself standout from the hundreds of other guys chasing her everyday.

Girl acting awkward for no reason?

Me: hey

Her: hey xx

Me: your school have any parties yet

Her: na xx

Me: same, *yawn* isn't it boring? -.-

Her: uh xx

Wtf. I just don't get it. What was wrong with what I said. What should I answer?

This girl flaked on me around a month ago when we were supposed to meet, she is a really low prospect and I contact her when I send restart messages out once a month or so. When she flaked she was quite apologetic and offered another day, I ignored her message at the time, anyway after some small talk today:

Me: Do you have plans for this week?

Her: I don't have any plans but unfortunately I cannot meet with you

Me: You think I want to meet with you?

Her: I think so, earlier you wanted but if not then that's even better.

Me: You must have a high opinion of yourself (I think this was a bad thing to say but her attitude kind of surprised me a bit)

Her: Yes I do. Well, I'm just really curious as to why you're writing to me?

Me: You gave me your contact so I can talk to you if I want to, I don't have to explain myself to you. You don't seem the pleasant girl as I earlier thought. (Again I think this was bad)

Her: No you don't have to right and what you think is not really my concern.

Basically, I know this is completely dead and I'll probably delete her contact tomorrow because I think there is no chance to get this girl out. But for future reference if someone can help me with what I should of said and where I possibly went wrong, would be appreciated. Also the texts were in a foreign language (her native) which I have translated to English, I don't really talk to girls so formally.

(10-10-2015 02:33 AM)LA Savage Wrote:  That conversation looked so boring and there was no call to action(getting her phone number). You basically just fed the attention whore taking about noticing she only takes selfies with her left sides. You didn't make yourself standout from the hundreds of other guys chasing her everyday.

Ding dong.

Links to any solid text game guide/overviews?

I met an 8 at an event the previous weekend. We developed solid rapport, so I got her number. After texting her, we decided to meet this coming Sunday evening. Yesterday evening though, she added me on fb. Now I don't want to add her. I reserve that for people I've known for a while plus for the obvious reason that I want to bang her.

Is it good idea to leave the friend request alone or text her upfront about me only adding/accepting people who I know well. I don't want to affect our meeting on Sunday, so I'm just taking a bit of precaution.