Post: #1

A month ago on a Saturday I went on a Tinder date with a porn star (it's LA, these things happen.) We'd been chatting for about a month, which was going well, finally met up for dinner. Which lasted 3 HOURS, including me making her snarf twice and her complimenting my dimples. It was amazing--I thought we really connected. And, I know she was walking in excited because I checked her twitter feed.
I walked her home, went in for a good night kiss, she gave me cheek, I made a joke about it, she asked if we'd see each other again, we set up tentative lunch for Monday, went in for kiss again, she gave cheek. Upon leaving, while walking on air but nervous, I sent her text apologizing if I was too forward, made a joke of it. She waited 5 hours to reply "I had a fun time, thank you."
She didn't respond to phone call to set up second date, and then later that week after I texted if she wanted to get together that weekend she said, "I'm sorry, I'm actually really busy with work."
So, 1. I have no idea what exactly went wrong. options are:
a. kiss?
b. not making clear that i didn't care about her being in porn
c. not previous touching before kiss
d. too many jokes?
e. we were talking about a job interview she'd had and I mentioned you want to win that and negotiate from a position of strength. was that off-putting?
f. I can't decide if I was too beta or too aggressive.

2. What do I do now? It's been over three weeks since my last text. I want to give it one more shot, one that'll work. Yeah yeah, she's probably insane cuz she's in porn, I've heard it. I thought we really connected, so I don't care.

Thanks

Post: #2

You didn't push hard enough, she lost interest. Move on. She's a porn star, literal jizz on the face and ass fucking, but a kiss on the cheek is too forward? Nah.

Post: #3

That's a fucking porn star. if she didnt give it up first night then you're game wasn't strong enough to begin with. You might have connected with her but she didnt connect with you. She's a hoe for a living so don't let a porn star act all lady like with you and then believe it. You took an L bro.

Post: #4

I agree with the previous posters.

Quote:And, I know she was walking in excited because I checked her twitter feed.

Your frame was one-itis toast before you even walked in the door. Checking her twitter feed before the date screams insecurity, and I'm sure she could smell it on you.

Quote: I sent her text apologizing if I was too forward

I rest my case. You apologized to a woman who fucks men on film for a living because you were too aggressive trying to kiss her?

She friend-zoned you because you weren't aggressive enough during the interaction. Elliot Hulse isn't a player, but he characterizes this perfectly. I watch this regularly, because he's right on with this:






Here's another one that covers the same material, but waxes philosophical about balancing tenderness and aggression:





Great videos that speak directly to your interaction here. If you watch them, you'll understand EXACTLY why she's telling you she's busy with work.

If I were in your situation, I'd send her this as a reopening text (h/t Roosh):

"Hey, don't forget to wear those red heels... look forward to seeing you soon"

If that provokes a response (something along the lines of "what?"), then wait until the end of that night and respond "hey, I must have sent that to the wrong person. How have you been?" (notice you don't apologize for sending it to the wrong person, you just acknowledge it and move on), re-establish a better frame and dive in. If it doesn't, let it go and chalk it up to experience. Don't sacrifice your dignity or self-respect for some ass. There's plenty more out there, and you need to have that abundance frame in your interactions with women.

Post: #5

Never apologizing for being too forward. If anything, you weren't forward enough.

Post: #6

I go back and forth on it, whether I was too aggressive or not aggressive enough. She was oddly shy about talking about sex, and we discussed how she gets embarrassed when her friends do. Plus, I'd talked to a female porn director who stressed treating her with respect. I thought that angle would work.
Oh, and I checked her twitter feed AFTER the date when I was in high neuroticism.

Post: #7

My real goal is how to get her back.

Post: #8

(04-14-2014 12:05 AM)TooManySecrets Wrote:  I go back and forth on it, whether I was too aggressive or not aggressive enough. She was oddly shy about talking about sex, and we discussed how she gets embarrassed when her friends do. Plus, I'd talked to a female porn director who stressed treating her with respect. I thought that angle would work.
Oh, and I checked her twitter feed AFTER the date when I was in high neuroticism.

There is your problem right there.

Post: #9

Forget this whore. And I mean exactly that. She's a whore. Literally.

Get your Game together.

I say this not to discourage you, but to be blunt and honest (which is why this forum exists: to provide truth to men) You're not ready to handle a chick like that. I don't mean in bed, I mean game wise.

Post: #10

The same kind of game goes for pornstars, attractive strippers as well as high-level escorts:

You need a lot of Super-Alpha-Game - sometimes strong asshole game, sometimes a combination of the best out there. It has to be top-notch, since they are so jaded, fucked up and get screwed on all levels. The only exception is if you meet her as a newbie in their career, then they may not have gone through that many dicks to leave them mentally wounded.

The only other chance you have if you are extremely attractive to her from the onset! In that case you would have banged within 3 hours and she would have been all over you very soon.

Post: #11

Looks like you were looking for a wife in a whore. She was banged in every hole within minutes of meeting someone and she knows that she's a cumslut so treating her like a lady will be interpreted by her hamster as "disconnection in chemistry", "lack of that one spark" and "he didn't whip out his dick after a handshake".

Post: #12

It's done, she lost interest, and you lost.

You can try hitting her up again. But I'd bet she'd give you the run around aka "hey im really busy blah blah blah"

Don't ever apologize, NEVER get advice from women, especially about women.

You didn't bring your A game, BUT you can learn by reading the responses to your posts and by reading all the material provided by this forum, roosh's blog, and ROK.

Quote: My real goal is how to get her back.

Dude this screams oneitis, she's a whore man, damaged good as well.

Post: #13

(04-14-2014 12:27 AM)Christian McQueen Wrote:  Forget this whore. And I mean exactly that. She's a whore. Literally.

Get your Game together.

I say this not to discourage you, but to be blunt and honest (which is why this forum exists: to provide truth to men) You're not ready to handle a chick like that. I don't mean in bed, I mean game wise.

this!

Post: #14

(04-13-2014 08:55 PM)TooManySecrets Wrote:  So, 1. I have no idea what exactly went wrong. options are:
a. Troll kiss?
b. not making clear that I'm a troll and didn't care about her being in porn
c. not previous touching before trolling
d. too many trolls?
e. we were talking about a job interview she'd had and I mentioned you want to win that and negotiate from a position of strength. was that troll-tastic?
f. I can't decide if I was too trollish or too trolladoll.

I fixed all the above for you guys.

Post: #15

I see your points, but given that she was 1. shy about talking about sex and 2. not looking just to get laid, since she fucks for a living, I thought treating her well was the way to go.

But, at this point, what can I say as my final attempt? I'm guessing that suggesting some daytime outing in greater LA is not it?

(04-14-2014 12:09 PM)kaotic Wrote:  It's done, she lost interest, and you lost.

You can try hitting her up again. But I'd bet she'd give you the run around aka "hey im really busy blah blah blah"

Don't ever apologize, NEVER get advice from women, especially about women.

You didn't bring your A game, BUT you can learn by reading the responses to your posts and by reading all the material provided by this forum, roosh's blog, and ROK.

Quote: My real goal is how to get her back.

Dude this screams oneitis, she's a whore man, damaged good as well.

Post: #16

(04-15-2014 01:14 AM)TooManySecrets Wrote:  I see your points, but given that she was 1. shy about talking about sex and 2. not looking just to get laid, since she fucks for a living, I thought treating her well was the way to go.

But, at this point, what can I say as my final attempt? I'm guessing that suggesting some daytime outing in greater LA is not it?

No, you're not seeing people's points if you're asking questions like this.

I'll bite, though.

1. Shy about talking about sex. If she's not comfortable talking about sex with you, she's either not sexually attracted to you, or you haven't made her comfortable enough to talk about it. Both reflect poorly on your chances and arguably, you.

2. What makes you think that a woman not looking "just for sex" wants to be treated as an asexual being? Wrong attempt. All women (not just ones looking for things OTHER than sex) are looking for sex. It's a primary part of their nature. Now, she's not just any woman, she's a woman that is HIGHLY sexual (no woman working in porn isn't highly sexual). What makes you think a HIGHLY sexual woman wants to be treated asexually?

Post: #17

You're seeing our points but you aren't GETTING our point....she's not into you. Sounds harsh, but all the signs are there.

Your final attempt could be reaching out to her again, IMHO that is useless.

Quote: I thought treating her well was the way to go.

SHE'S A PORNSTAR man ! Remember, you got that advice from a woman.

Quote: But, at this point, what can I say as my final attempt? I'm guessing that suggesting some daytime outing in greater LA is not it?

I really doubt she's going to even respond back, if she already gave you the run around with this I'm busy excuse.

(04-14-2014 12:09 PM)kaotic Wrote:  It's done, she lost interest, and you lost.

You can try hitting her up again. But I'd bet she'd give you the run around aka "hey im really busy blah blah blah"

Don't ever apologize, NEVER get advice from women, especially about women.

You didn't bring your A game, BUT you can learn by reading the responses to your posts and by reading all the material provided by this forum, roosh's blog, and ROK.

Quote: My real goal is how to get her back.

Dude this screams oneitis, she's a whore man, damaged good as well.

[/quote]

Post: #18

From reading this and other sites, I seem to have been guilty of succumbing to oneitis. I'm getting old, and she seemed awesome. Now, that aside and taken into account for future ladies, what is my final attempt text? Yes, I know, I'm not getting the point, but give me this one last try and then I'll man up.

Post: #19

^^^Roosh's red heel text. If that doesn't work, just next her.

Post: #20

And when it doesn't work out just remember,

Post: #21

seems like a troll post.

Post: #22

Yep if it doesnt work, lets see who she is

Post: #23

Why did you take a porn star out for dinner? You should of made it clear that you only wanted her as a cumrag which is what she is.

How can you get one-it is over a porn star unless you're really into that cuckoldry fantasy.

What was the next step introducing her to the family, and tell them not to google her name/stage name.

Anyway this is a brilliant idea for a reality tv show. Call it something like Mummy I'm in love with a porn star. MTV will buy the rights.

Post: #24

I'm b

Post: #25

I'm not a troll and I know it's both sad and ridiculous. I'm not proud of any aspect of this, except that I didn't go full Lloyd Dobler and blast "In Your Eyes" from a boom box outsid her apartment. I'm just looking for advice for the last gasp text. The red heels text won't be too insulting?