Post: #1426

Dusty, nice report!

Is it normal for pinays to put out a lot of LMR? Given what I read so far, it's a little surprising that there is LMR.

Post: #1427

(04-05-2015 01:48 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  Dusty, nice report!

Is it normal for pinays to put out a lot of LMR? Given what I read so far, it's a little surprising that there is LMR.

I have only two data points, but they both put up LMR but it was obvious to me that they wanted me to bust through it.

The first one didn't want to feel like a slut banging a foreigner. Edit: I forgot also too, Jessica knew about Daphne and my date the next day. She said she didn't want to sleep with me because it would be a bad thing to do to Daphne and she felt like she was interfering. I told her it was ok because I hadn't even kissed Daphne yet (true at that point) and I don't know yet if things will work out with her. That reassurance helped.

The second one was sexually inexperienced and a bit scared. I escalated over a couple nights until the bang came. The second bang worked better because she was wetter from being more comfortable having done it the night before.

Another thing about filipina girls (and SEA girls in general), is they have impeccable hygiene. They both showered before sex and asked me to shower (the first one said "you should shower before bed" so I knew she was considering sex). I like good hygiene.

They were both bashful about their bodies. At the pool in their bikinis, both of them wouldn't let me look at their bodies. They wrapped a towel around themselves and put their feet in first, told me to look away, then ripped the towel off before going all the way into the pool. I had to keep the lights off during sex, and they both felt uncomfortable if I stared at their bodies too much with whatever light was in the room.

Post: #1428

That's interesting and good to know, Dusty. I'll have to mentally prepare to break through LMR (something I'm not very good at). And I like the idea of showering before sex, because the heat and humidity are boner killers for me. Like to go at it fresh!

Post: #1429

They'll put up more LMR than your average American woman, certainly. But at the end of the day and speaking very broadly here, women evolved to be the same anywhere in the world in that they will get the tingles in their 'gina if you are applying proper game. I suspect that their LMR to Dusty is largely due to the age gap. Comparatively, you'd get much more LMR in the US if you had a similar age gap with your target. Shit, you'd get a whole lot more FMR here for that, *First* Minute Resistance... Western Society has horribly skewed it and made it socially taboo to follow the natural evolutionary psychology instinct of males to want to mate with younger, more physically fit females. And this disturbing trend is seeping in to other, previously untouched, corners of the world. I find it very alarming. For you CleanSlate, just apply what you've learned. When they put up LMR, agree with them, pull back and after a few minutes persist again. Rinse, repeat. Dusty could probably give you more specific game tips. *tips hat*

If you are in your late 30s and 40s, etc. when you are dating these 18 year olds, just remember that in Asia, "Too Young" is just a name.

(Disclaimer: Be aware that 18 is the minimum legal age in the Philippines. I am not recommending knowingly breaking the law.)

Post: #1430

(04-05-2015 02:07 PM)Dusty Wrote:  Another thing about filipina girls (and SEA girls in general), is they have impeccable hygiene. They both showered before sex and asked me to shower (the first one said "you should shower before bed" so I knew she was considering sex). I like good hygiene.

They were both bashful about their bodies. At the pool in their bikinis, both of them wouldn't let me look at their bodies. They wrapped a towel around themselves and put their feet in first, told me to look away, then ripped the towel off before going all the way into the pool. I had to keep the lights off during sex, and they both felt uncomfortable if I stared at their bodies too much with whatever light was in the room.

(04-05-2015 02:16 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  That's interesting and good to know, Dusty. I'll have to mentally prepare to break through LMR (something I'm not very good at). And I like the idea of showering before sex, because the heat and humidity are boner killers for me. Like to go at it fresh!

Speaking of this, here's what I normally do. If you already know that the bang is guaranteed to happen (Second or third bang, you two are already comfortable with each other, etc.) and you want to be able to see and appreciate her body, ask her to take a shower with you. I then take the soap and ceremoniously lather her body. Usually the first time she will be shy and keep her back to me, but she enjoys the slippery hands caressing her much more as I do. She then turns around and takes the cue to return the gesture and lathers me up. Doing this little ceremony allows me to see that body in all its glory as I get down to soap her round ass and legs. It allows both of us to see we're cleaned up. And it makes for awesome foreplay and shower sex which doesn't happen for her as often and is a pleasantly unexpected welcome experience.

Personally, I get a kick out of having her undress me, shoes and socks, shirt, pants and all as we prepare to shower together. Her femininity in this way arouses me and gets us both into it.

My dick enjoys it too and often tells me "SF, you are the fucking MAN! Can you stick me in her now?"

I say back to him "Patience old friend. We will destroy that poosy soon and the victory will be more exquisite as I make her slowly brings us to the edge. Savor it."

To which he invariably responds "That sounds fucking AWESOME man! Can you stick me in her now?"

Post: #1431

(04-05-2015 01:48 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  Dusty, nice report!

Is it normal for pinays to put out a lot of LMR? Given what I read so far, it's a little surprising that there is LMR.

Reminds me when I was with a girl I knew was a total slut (and later experience confirmed it) who gave me like 40 minutes LMR treatment.

Like "I'm not that kinda girl", "you bring other girls here", "how come you have so many condoms if you drawer", bla-bla, yada-yada...

Post: #1432

(04-05-2015 02:18 PM)Scott Free Wrote:  (Disclaimer: Be aware that 18 is the minimum legal age in the Philippines. I am not recommending knowingly breaking the law.)

And unknowingly too.

Believe me, you don't want to end up on a wrong side of a law in Philippines.

As a minimum, it'll cost you some pesos...

Post: #1433

Just back from a 10 day trip to Philipines, stayed on Makati avenue in Manila. I'm based in Thailand and Philipines is way easier as reported, much more interest and eye contact from girls in clubs and in conversations girls bringing up girlfriend scenarios.

Tinder worked pretty well not just for Filipinos I met up with a Thai and Vietnamese girl also via tinder with legit jobs etc. I stuck to bars and clubs, went around greenbelt mall one day and just saw families walking about shopping and no eye contact from any girls. My friend took me to club Havana and la cafe just for a quick look but it was obviously all pros so avoided those places and mainly hung out with some friends I knew working there and some hookups from tinder.

Overall hooked up with 3 girls during my stay all Filipinos very sweet but quality in general lower than thailand, rating probably two 6s and a 7. Went out to Exclusive club not sure if that's a pro hangout I got w lot of eye contact but I was with a large group that all worked in a call center so mainly just stuck with them. Hottest girls I saw in clubs were viet and Chinese, the Chinese girls were very aloof and I didn't talk to any of them but had fun with some of the viet girls who liked to get drunk and have fun.

Hit up some clubs during the weekdays and they were all closed (the clubs in city of dreams and a few others) which was a bit annoying, seems like the nightlife is best in weekends.

My aim for the trip was just to scout out Manila and to have fun not really to collect notches, imo in SEA the effort is about finding quality and a good connection notches are almost irrelevant here. The last few days I hung out with the last girls I hooked up with and just relaxed with her, she called in sick for work to hang out with me and then was suspended from work which kinda sucks. Two of the girls I paid for everything when out and one paid her own way.

Some funny differences from Thailand, none of the girls played with their phones while we were hanging out, although I was constantly on my phone using tinder when I was with them, also I told one girl I was going to have a shower one night before bed and she said 'what for?'. Disclaimer - one girl asked for help for a taxi the next day, I felt sorry for her as she was obviously broke and gave her 500 pesos so that one may well be judged as me paying for it, depending on perspective, feel free to flame me for that or give any advice on what I should have done.

I'll be back for a longer trip this was just a quick scout next time will focus more on the upscale clubs as I saw good quality there but it's a shame they are not open all week as I like to go out most nights.

Post: #1434

(04-05-2015 04:16 AM)cmrectro Wrote:  

(04-04-2015 04:02 AM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

(03-20-2015 03:48 AM)cmrectro Wrote:  Something here is really pissing me off. Anyone ever notice FC changing your city on you? you can have your city as Nw York cuz that is where you are from and want that. You are going about your business when you randomly notice there it s now set as Manila, Manila! wtf? who is fucking around with my profile? lol I don't want my location to be tinkered with and don't understand why it keeps changing without me wanting or even knowing until a chatmate mentions it to me!

Wild guess, could it be keying off your listed phone number ( former database programmer here)

No I have no listed phone number and either way I know it is not that because it just happens to be that today it did the same stupid thing again! only this time it randomly changed my profile to Cebu! So it really is just random. I wondered why people started making Cebu-related comments to me and I wondered why all of this now. Then one happened to specifically mention my profile was set to Cebu. if they don't go and tell me I don't even realize. This is sooo annoying. I had some users complain I was lying. All because this site keeps randomly changing my city. Every 3 times I edit my profile, it changes my city to a random one in the Philippines. I want to keep my profile set to Texas where I am from, even when I am in the Philippines.

I'm pretty sure it changes the location based on your IP address. Happened to me as well except it was changing it back to Manila when I was actually there. Are you using mobile data? Maybe that ends up messing with the system and they think you're somewhere that you're not.

On the topic of FC - do you guys ever pay attention to their user ID? It appears to increase with time. I have noticed a lot of girls who are down to basically just come straight over to my place are usually really low user ID's (like most people are 7xxxxxx and they are 4xxxxxx) so I guess this means they have been on there for years. It makes me kind of suspicious and I wonder if they are wanting money or something. I had one girl who wanted to come over and then I added her on skype and her age was 17 - on FC she was 19, she said she just had a fake age on skype but that along with her low user ID was enough to make me think that something wasn't right so I didn't end up meeting her.

Post: #1435

(04-06-2015 04:29 AM)Munch Wrote:  My aim for the trip was just to scout out Manila and to have fun not really to collect notches, imo in SEA the effort is about finding quality and a good connection notches are almost irrelevant here. The last few days I hung out with the last girls I hooked up with and just relaxed with her, she called in sick for work to hang out with me and then was suspended from work which kinda sucks. Two of the girls I paid for everything when out and one paid her own way.

Some funny differences from Thailand, none of the girls played with their phones while we were hanging out, although I was constantly on my phone using tinder when I was with them, also I told one girl I was going to have a shower one night before bed and she said 'what for?'. Disclaimer - one girl asked for help for a taxi the next day, I felt sorry for her as she was obviously broke and gave her 500 pesos so that one may well be judged as me paying for it, depending on perspective, feel free to flame me for that or give any advice on what I should have done.

Flame you? Nonsense! My opinion is this: I can help a girl out. I can pay for her cab. I can buy her drinks all night. Shit, I can pay for a whole vacation for the two of us. I can do all that and more, as long as it keeps true to two of my rules:

1. It is something that I genuinely want to do and;
2. I maintain my frame.

I will not allow a woman (or anyone else) to guilt me into ever doing something I do not want to do. I reward good behavior and I punish bad behavior. A lot of Filipinas will bring up a hard luck case and it isn't always them trying to scam you. The Philippines is a Third World country and these girls usually don't make much. A dad gets sick, a brother goes to jail, a mom has cancer, shit happens... But to her it will be more significant since she likely doesn't have the same means that I do to deal with it. It's to be expected.

If she asks me for a trivial amount of cash and is blatant or frequent about it or if she asks for what I think is a significant amount of cash within a short period of meeting me, I'll call her out on it so that she won't do it to another guy and then I cut her off. She has to learn more subtlety than that and she has invest in me first. My brother was telling me the last time I was there that he gamed this hot ass quite well and hit it off with her. The following day, he got a text message from his chick's girlfriend who was with them at the bar that night. She was asking him for money and he couldn't believe she had the gall. He quickly pumped and dumped knowing that the flood gates would open soon after.

Now, if it happens after some time of meeting me, I judge whether she's taking me for a ride or not. Something that I've gotten to be good at (At least when it comes to Pinays). Chances are she is insincere and I punish her by withdrawing my attention and making my displeasure known in (not always) subtle ways that she is sure to pick up. If I enjoy her company and she seems sincere, then I'll give what I can comfortably spare. I make decent money over here and a few hundred pesos is nothing for me over there. If it helps alleviate some human suffering then I feel better for it. But in the end, I think more than I feel. I see it as her reward for following my lead and doing things my way. And with that frame firmly maintained, she learns it quickly.

Rewarding good behavior doesn't have to be monetary. It could be a comment, it could be a gesture, whatever. The point is, you are constantly training these girls and people around you to treat you better. I am around during happy times and scarce during sad times. I am soon associated with their feeling of happiness so that at some point, the reverse happens: my mere presence brings them joy. Some guys may not agree with paying out even a penny to a girl. I don't really care. I'm a man and I will live by my own code.

Edit: grammar

Post: #1436

(04-05-2015 01:09 PM)Scott Free Wrote:  Let me put this in your terms, his insight allows greater understanding of Pinays which lead to better interactions with them which opens up more/better bangs.

No way, dude, I don't condone banging chicks. I spend all of my time reading history books and building Habitats for Humanity. It's much more rewarding.

Then, if I have a little free time, I blow off some steam by running around barefoot eating fried bananas with street children. I got tetanus once, but it was completely worth it.

Sure, there are high-end malls, cafes, and bars all around the country packed with well-dressed, educated girls from the middle to upper class, but that stuff is not really authentic so I suggest everyone avoid it as much as possible. You might be tempted to have pre-marital sex, which is really frowned upon here.

"Culture" doesn't include dating, drinking, music, sex, or any of that boring stuff, contrary to what the actual definition of the word might lead you to believe.

Post: #1437

Quite willing to lose the smarts debate, I was wrong, Enigma is totally right, how could I be so narrow minded, and so on. No need to beat the dead horse.

TL;DR: True sweet and submissive Filipinos do exist and can be worth the effort of treating them well.

Chauvinist male rant follows.

Much more important to me than general smarts is agreeability. I really want someone willing to do ALL the housework, and not argue because they accept the basic premise that the man is the boss. May women are fairly close to this here, but real compliance is not as common as you might think.

What I've seen a lot is the girls state they want equality etc but in actuality they are quite willing to wash dishes do laundry etc. However, they don't take as a fundamental value that they should not argue with the man. When they think they're right they'll take you on.

Since I am 35 years older, have worked with different people for 25 years and I am PAYING FOR EVERYTHING I am almost always right, so I don't want to hear it-- especially when I am planning on bringing her back to the USA so SHE is going to need to understand how to operate there-- I am not trying to stay in the Philippines indefinitely. She is trying to get into MY world, not vice versa. I've been an adult about 10 times longer than she has, what can she tell me except the 1 in 50 times when I am just missing something due to a personality weakness?

SHE needs to be focusing on carefully listening to and learning from ME-- the guy that will be making her whole life possible in terms of food, shelter, environment and opportunity for her an all her descendants. I know one girl here with a nursing degree, making a dollar an hour giving out drug info at a call center. If she was in the US she could be a drug rep going to doctor's offices with the same knowledge and better clothes making at least $20 per hour. 2000% per cent better salary!!!

The golden rule: Those who have the gold make the rules. In reality I constantly monitor her mood and try to keep her feeling safe and comfortable. But a lot of time spent debating life decisions is not in the cards-- that time is better spent with me INSTRUCTING her on how to live in a society where things move fast and people get things done.
She needs to follow my lead and try to help me in execution, not argue with my plans.

One red flag debate is "Why don't you own a house? You should buy a house." it's framed in terms of benefit to me, but it's essentially challenging my authority and trying to coerce me to buy something which in the West would take over my fucking life for 10 years in California with the housing costs there. No deal. Next subject.

I mean don't beat girls up and keep them from going outside or learning, improving themselves like some Saudi troglodyte ( uh-oh.. any Saudis here..)

What I've realized is the most valuable type is one that accepts the basic premise that you are the boss as long as you are not some horrible ogre.
Some girls actually explicitly state this as a form of marketing.. "The man is the head of the family".

One girl actively looks around for things to clean up whenever she is in my apartment , and actively seeks to find out what I want her to cook. Also playfully willing to do practically anything in bed.

I am QUITE interested in her. I'm not seeing the 7+ girls displaying any kind of cooperative attitude like that, so they get to stay here or ship out for a few years returning at a worn-out 27. It's not a great choice here for any of them except the very top elite.

Many Filipinas are very happy with their attentive guys, they make very romantic and cute couples. The country has treated me well so far and I am grateful. I am very lucky there is a refuge from sardonic, overconfident American women.

And also women who are delighted to try to fulfill their basic biological function, which is to have children.

Post: #1438

(04-07-2015 02:41 AM)Enigma Wrote:  No way, dude, I don't condone banging chicks. I spend all of my time reading history books and building Habitats for Humanity. It's much more rewarding.

Then, if I have a little free time, I blow off some steam by running around barefoot eating fried bananas with street children. I got tetanus once, but it was completely worth it.

Sure, there are high-end malls, cafes, and bars all around the country packed with well-dressed, educated girls from the middle to upper class, but that stuff is not really authentic so I suggest everyone avoid it as much as possible. You might be tempted to have pre-marital sex, which is really frowned upon here.

"Culture" doesn't include dating, drinking, music, sex, or any of that boring stuff, contrary to what the actual definition of the word might lead you to believe.

(04-07-2015 04:12 AM)iknowexactly Wrote:  Quite willing to lose the smarts debate, I was wrong, Enigma is totally right, how could I be so narrow minded, and so on. No need to beat the dead horse.

Hey man, I have a lot of respect for you and I think it was a classy move what you posted after Enigma's explanation. I hope you don't think I was getting on your case. It was simply to refute this (I believe, misguided) impression that others were airing regarding the Pinays I knew so well. I can be sentimental at times and I grew up a Romantic (as in I was really into Roman History not as in I watched tele-novellas all day with boxes of Kleenex) and it kicks in when I hear something untrue about what I know otherwise.

(04-07-2015 04:12 AM)iknowexactly Wrote:  Much more important to me than general smarts is agreeability. I really want someone willing to do ALL the housework, and not argue because they accept the basic premise that the man is the boss. May women are fairly close to this here, but real compliance is not as common as you might think.

What I've seen a lot is the girls state they want equality etc but in actuality they are quite willing to wash dishes do laundry etc. However, they don't take as a fundamental value that they should not argue with the man. When they think they're right they'll take you on.

Since I am 35 years older, have worked with different people for 25 years and I am PAYING FOR EVERYTHING I am almost always right, so I don't want to hear it-- especially when I am planning on bringing her back to the USA so SHE is going to need to understand how to operate there-- I am not trying to stay in the Philippines indefinitely. She is trying to get into MY world, not vice versa. I've been an adult about 10 times longer than she has, what can she tell me except the 1 in 50 times when I am just missing something due to a personality weakness?

SHE needs to be focusing on carefully listening to and learning from ME-- the guy that will be making her whole life possible in terms of food, shelter, environment and opportunity for her an all her descendants. I know one girl here with a nursing degree, making a dollar an hour giving out drug info at a call center. If she was in the US she could be a drug rep going to doctor's offices with the same knowledge and better clothes making at least $20 per hour. 2000% per cent better salary!!!

The golden rule: Those who have the gold make the rules. In reality I constantly monitor her mood and try to keep her feeling safe and comfortable. But a lot of time spent debating life decisions is not in the cards-- that time is better spent with me INSTRUCTING her on how to live in a society where things move fast and people get things done.
She needs to follow my lead and try to help me in execution, not argue with my plans.

One red flag debate is "Why don't you own a house? You should buy a house." it's framed in terms of benefit to me, but it's essentially challenging my authority and trying to coerce me to buy something which in the West would take over my fucking life for 10 years in California with the housing costs there. No deal. Next subject.

I mean don't beat girls up and keep them from going outside or learning, improving themselves like some Saudi troglodyte ( uh-oh.. any Saudis here..)

What I've realized is the most valuable type is one that accepts the basic premise that you are the boss as long as you are not some horrible ogre.
Some girls actually explicitly state this as a form of marketing.. "The man is the head of the family".

One girl actively looks around for things to clean up whenever she is in my apartment , and actively seeks to find out what I want her to cook. Also playfully willing to do practically anything in bed.

I am QUITE interested in her. I'm not seeing the 7+ girls displaying any kind of cooperative attitude like that, so they get to stay here or ship out for a few years returning at a worn-out 27. It's not a great choice here for any of them except the very top elite.

Many Filipinas are very happy with their attentive guys, they make very romantic and cute couples. The country has treated me well so far and I am grateful. I am very lucky there is a refuge from sardonic, overconfident American women.

And also women who are delighted to try to fulfill their basic biological function, which is to have children.

These are golden nuggets of wisdom from a well experienced man. Ignore these words at your own peril.

IKE, very much in-line with my personal beliefs, only more eloquently said and structured.

Post: #1439

I know that this is praised as the easiest country and all, but I have noticed people have had many complaints and I have shared some of mine. Another one I have is about how they react to what you said. They seem to take it the wrong way Every single time I tell the something like "sorry I was busy at work" so they understand that I am not ignoring them on purpose, but just did not get to talk. Every single pinays responds with "sorry for disturbing you". You don't want all the pinays thinking they are a disturbance becuase that makes things negative. This annoying thing is so repetitive I have saved a statement I copy and paste every time a pinay says that annoying phrase. "You did not disturb me. I was just telling you what I was doing so you knew why I have not been able to talk."

If I don't reply for 5 minutes a get a message from her saying:
"busy?" or "still there?"
implying annoyance that I am not replying fast enough. All these things get on my nerves!

Anyone else notice the above things happen too frequently?

Post: #1440

(04-07-2015 08:47 PM)cmrectro Wrote:  I know that this is praised as the easiest country and all, but I have noticed people have had many complaints and I have shared some of mine. Another one I have is about how they react to what you said. They seem to take it the wrong way Every single time I tell the something like "sorry I was busy at work" so they understand that I am not ignoring them on purpose, but just did not get to talk. Every single pinays responds with "sorry for disturbing you". You don't want all the pinays thinking they are a disturbance becuase that makes things negative. This annoying thing is so repetitive I have saved a statement I copy and paste every time a pinay says that annoying phrase. "You did not disturb me. I was just telling you what I was doing so you knew why I have not been able to talk."

If I don't reply for 5 minutes a get a message from her saying:
"busy?" or "still there?"
implying annoyance that I am not replying fast enough. All these things get on my nerves!

Anyone else notice the above things happen too frequently?

Yes, it's just like that for me too.

Post: #1441

I was kind of retarded on phone/internet logistics for my short scouting trip . I offer up lessons learned as a sort of data sheet, but no pride here - if you have better ideas please offer them.

Staying in touch at home - this I did right. My carrier is AT&T and I ordered a 30 day "passport" plan for I think $30 that allowed me to text back home and to get Internet hotspot connections in the Phils. It would also allow me to take phone calls back to the states, but I didn't make any calls.

Texting There - this is where I fucked up. I went without a philippine phone number, so the locals couldn't text me. I downloaded Viber (like whatsap, but more common in the Phils - it allows you to text over the internet with no charge). The problem with Viber is the other person has to have it, and not everyone has it. You need a Philippine phone. I bought a cheap burner phone with one month of texting, but the texting was so impossible I largely gave up on it. Lesson Learned . I'm due to upgrade my iPhone and I will keep my old device. I'll bring both devices and get a Phils SIM card for the old iPhone and use that for texting locally. They sell SIM cards at the Manila airport.

Internet. The Internet is really slow in the Phils. The WiFi in my condo was essentially useless. It seemed like the best Internet was when I was in Starbucks and bought a Globe one hour "load". I used the "load" user name and password on both my phone and laptop and got solid Internet connections. So Globe seems to be the best. I stopped by a Globe store in the mall and they said I could get 30 days unlimited (I think) Globe load. They also said I could buy some type of device for 1,500 pesos to use Globe internet with my laptop (some type of router I guess??). I didn't do it because I only had a couple more days left. Had I known I would have got the whole set up on day 1.

There is free Internet in a lot of places (like Greenbelt mall) but it is slow and logs you out pretty fast if you are not constantly using it. You might want to check your emails after 10 minutes of inactivity and you have to log in again.

Post: #1442

(04-07-2015 08:47 PM)cmrectro Wrote:  I know that this is praised as the easiest country and all, but I have noticed people have had many complaints and I have shared some of mine. Another one I have is about how they react to what you said. They seem to take it the wrong way Every single time I tell the something like "sorry I was busy at work" so they understand that I am not ignoring them on purpose, but just did not get to talk. Every single pinays responds with "sorry for disturbing you". You don't want all the pinays thinking they are a disturbance becuase that makes things negative. This annoying thing is so repetitive I have saved a statement I copy and paste every time a pinay says that annoying phrase. "You did not disturb me. I was just telling you what I was doing so you knew why I have not been able to talk."

If I don't reply for 5 minutes a get a message from her saying:
"busy?" or "still there?"
implying annoyance that I am not replying fast enough. All these things get on my nerves!

Anyone else notice the above things happen too frequently?

(04-07-2015 08:53 PM)Onto Wrote:  Yes, it's just like that for me too.

I'm not surprised, fellas. I made a word-vomit post on cultural communications difference between the West and the East and it basically boils down to Westerners being more direct in their manner and in their words and Easterners being more socially sensitive and placing more emphasis on non-verbal language.

Without you being in front of her when you tell them "Sorry, I was busy at work," they are not able to draw the vast information they normally are able to from your non-verbals. They hear your words and that is the only thing they can go on and to them it sounds harsher. The Westerner says exactly what he means, no more and no less, that he was busy and the Easterner tries to compensate for lack of non-verbals by placing too much meaning in the words. This is worse when the communication is being read because there is no easy way to identify its tone. An Eastern Female, especially, looks at the short and curt response and presumes your impatience or coldness. To avoid this, include a longer reply.

Something along the lines of "Hey babe, sorry. It was a crazy day at work and my boss wouldn't even let me look at my phone. I need to retire sooner! Are you good at giving back rubs? My back is killing me right now." To a Western woman, this is a rather weak response and makes you look like a pushover/beta especially when used with proper grammar (Something that kills me when I have to write like a grade schooler.) It is too wordy and they don't have the attention span for it. To an Eastern woman, it compensates for the lack of non-verbals and is appreciated by them more. It deflects their annoyance and puts them in the more feminine and caring role. I will also relax my rules of never saying sorry or using smileys around them and I find that it helps. Try it and let me know how it goes.

Also, bear in mind that you two will have a difference in the perspective of time. Filipinos are more laid back, time-wise and are able to find the time to do a lot of things even during work. Manila hardly ever sleeps and we are never stringent or strict when it comes to time. You'll want to paint a cultural picture to your girls on how this is different in the West so that they can learn not to be so invasive. Do this with a lot of subtlety and indirectness so that they don't think you are trying to say something else to them.

Post: #1443

^ Good post Scott Free. Also a good tip about not being curt or short.

I use A LOT more smilies and longer sentences than I usually use, and it makes me worry that I'm being too beta. It seems to go over well for them, at least for now. I use a little self-deprecating humor, and just today I have been coming down with a cold (had to leave work early)... had been telling them that I'm not feeling well, and their caring side comes out in full force. Advising me to gargle with salt water, take medicine, get rest, the list goes on. This is just a tiny example, but it really contrasts with my ex-wife who did not care if I got sick - and even went so far to suggest that I was faking it. Really.

Post: #1444

Is it possible to be too beta in the Philippines? That's basically what these girls are looking for in a man.

Post: #1445

(04-07-2015 08:47 PM)cmrectro Wrote:  I know that this is praised as the easiest country and all, but I have noticed people have had many complaints and I have shared some of mine. Another one I have is about how they react to what you said. They seem to take it the wrong way Every single time I tell the something like "sorry I was busy at work" so they understand that I am not ignoring them on purpose, but just did not get to talk. Every single pinays responds with "sorry for disturbing you". You don't want all the pinays thinking they are a disturbance becuase that makes things negative. This annoying thing is so repetitive I have saved a statement I copy and paste every time a pinay says that annoying phrase. "You did not disturb me. I was just telling you what I was doing so you knew why I have not been able to talk."

If I don't reply for 5 minutes a get a message from her saying:
"busy?" or "still there?"
implying annoyance that I am not replying fast enough. All these things get on my nerves!

Anyone else notice the above things happen too frequently?

Oh wow. This would happen to me all the time. Another one along the same lines was "am I interrupting something?". I guess I should stop getting annoyed by this if they are all like that.

(04-07-2015 09:14 PM)Dusty Wrote:   Internet. The Internet is really slow in the Phils. The WiFi in my condo was essentially useless. It seemed like the best Internet was when I was in Starbucks and bought a Globe one hour "load". I used the "load" user name and password on both my phone and laptop and got solid Internet connections. So Globe seems to be the best. I stopped by a Globe store in the mall and they said I could get 30 days unlimited (I think) Globe load. They also said I could buy some type of device for 1,500 pesos to use Globe internet with my laptop (some type of router I guess??). I didn't do it because I only had a couple more days left. Had I known I would have got the whole set up on day 1.

There is free Internet in a lot of places (like Greenbelt mall) but it is slow and logs you out pretty fast if you are not constantly using it. You might want to check your emails after 10 minutes of inactivity and you have to log in again.

I would definitely recommend globe over smart, I had a terrible experience with Smart and basically wasted 1000 peso on a 1 month plan as it turned out the sim card I got was faulty, and their customer service was really bad. Be prepared to spend hours on hold or waiting in the shop, only to have the issue still not fixed.

The device you can buy is a portable wifi hotspot, both globe and smart have this. It's pretty much the same thing some phones can do where you make a portable wifi hotspot, it can be good if you're away from a power source as that can chew through your phone battery really quick. Another reason I would recommend globe is one girl had the smart wifi but half the time it would barely work and she would go and purchase a 1 day internet for her phone which was globe and the internet was a lot better. I think it can depend on the reception in your area, so if you are going to be staying in one place for most of your stay it could be worth testing out both on a 1 day plan before you buy a whole month plan.

Both globe and smart seem to be really slow during peak hours, and both seem to speed up a lot after midnight. I do wonder if they have some kind of traffic limit which slows you down after you have used a certain amount of data, as the smart connection would always seem to be much better come exactly midnight.

I would be interested to hear from the guys living here permanently on the internet situation, if you get your own condo and adsl is it a lot more reliable? One airbnb place I stayed at had sky broadband which was actually slower than mobile broadband some of the time...

Post: #1446

(04-07-2015 08:47 PM)cmrectro Wrote:  Another one I have is about how they react to what you said. They seem to take it the wrong way Every single time I tell the something like "sorry I was busy at work" so they understand that I am not ignoring them on purpose, but just did not get to talk. Every single pinays responds with "sorry for disturbing you".

Scott Free above has a better explanation to prevent escalation, longer responses, but here is some ideas from me..

"Sorry for disturbing you" can be sort of code when they're fishing for the fact you like them, it's kind of when an American says to you after being rejected "Sorry to bother you!" spitefully .

My impression is they're close to writing you off when they say this because they think you don't like them.

Here's some others I've found:

1) "Sorry" seems to be more formal like saying "I apologize" in English. I still don't grasp why they seem to react so strongly to that.

2) If someone has something bad happen to them, and you say "You poor girl" they have become REALLY mad because they thought I was mocking their financial weakness. POOR is an ugly word here.

3) Flirting is also an ugly word I have found, if I ask a girl if she was flirting she got REALLY mad, it was like calling her a slut.

Post: #1447

(04-06-2015 12:02 PM)Savage Wrote:  I had one girl who wanted to come over and then I added her on skype and her age was 17 - on FC she was 19, she said she just had a fake age on skype but that along with her low user ID was enough to make me think that something wasn't right so I didn't end up meeting her.

I have had three girls contact me who were obviously DTF and somehow it got out that they were under 18 BEFORE I MET THEM lol.

They all seemed to know the law says 18 and they were apologetic, I think they know the competition is fierce-- but I met one multi-decade, connected expat who told me to watch out for entrapment- they may send their daughter to you, then blackmail you.

No way am I even meeting someone under 18.

Post: #1448

I also had better experience with Globe internet (Tattoo) than with Smart. PLDT is very patchy, and SkyCable is close to worthless.

Another thing to pay attention to: don't except 3G signal at your condo - you may have it or you may not.

Furthermore, in some condos (even at the heart of Greenbelt) you may hardly get ANY mobile signal at all. So I suggest you visit the place before you hire to see that you aren't going to end up totally disconnected.

Post: #1449

(04-08-2015 02:04 AM)dreambig Wrote:  Is it possible to be too beta in the Philippines? That's basically what these girls are looking for in a man.

Of course you can be too beta in the Phils. You need to be the man and take the lead. Nothing will happen unless you lead - make the approach, plan the date, escalate hand holding, kissing, getting her to your room, busting through LMR and bang!

Just don't be a prick to these girls. They haven't been damaged by feminism so they don't need to be "negged" or otherwise treated like shit in order to get Gina tingles.

Post: #1450

(04-08-2015 03:16 AM)iknowexactly Wrote:  I have had three girls contact me who were obviously DTF and somehow it got out that they were under 18 BEFORE I MET THEM lol.

They all seemed to know the law says 18 and they were apologetic, I think they know the competition is fierce-- but I met one multi-decade, connected expat who told me to watch out for entrapment- they may send their daughter to you, then blackmail you.

No way am I even meeting someone under 18.

What do you do? I guess checking their ID when you meet them should be required. If she has a problem with that then there are other less risky girls.