Post: #1376

(01-16-2016 08:56 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  ^ I appreciate the advice, but I honestly don't struggle to not drink whatsoever. So at least for me, I don't really vibe with AA's perspective on that matter and agree with Allen Carr's paradigm much more. He talks about that specific issue with AA a lot in the book.

I mean, I couldn't imagine waking up everyday to tell myself I couldn't do something - these guys are putting theirselves through slow torture, and it seems like a horrible way to frame it in your mind. Willpower is known to be finite, and if you read psycho-cybernetics, it becomes instantly clear why building the idea of "I am an alcoholic" or "I am one drink away from rock bottom" is a dangerous thing to do with your self image. Possibly the worst thing a man could do with something this destructive.

In fact, psycho-cybernetics offers a lot of insight into why Carr's methods have proven so effective over the years.

Anyhow, as long as I've made the decision to not drink already, as I've done again today, I have zero problem not doing it. Can even go out and be around other partiers and have a good time - doesn't bother me in the slightest. In fact, I would say that the reason I started drinking again is because I set a one year goal instead of just committing to kicking it for good, but I also accept not everyone is the same in this regard, so I'm not going to knock on the methedology of the group.

The reason I mentioned a possible long-termer thread is because I know a few guys from the forum who are well past the year mark, and the ride of a guy past the year stage is definitely different than that of guys who are just now starting or on the fence. My friendships with the guys who've been there and done it, and the extra layer of accountability that creates, have proven to be especially valuable in my own journey. Possibly overkill to have another thread, though - was just throwing it out there.

I agree. There are different routes to sobriety for different people. I think the no drink today mantra works best for people who have a fairly constant compulsion. I met people in rehab and AA who had gone as far down the rabbit hole as you can without dying (liver failure, multiple seizures, bad car crashes, 3 or more DUIs, vodka for breakfast, waking up at 3am to have a few drinks and ward off the DTs before "proper" drinking at 7am etc etc).
For some people the next drink means their last bender means death.
They need the daily reminder, because nothing else will work at that point.
And for the rest of us, we are probably closer to getting to that stage then we choose to believe.

After 20 months sober from alcohol, I don't have any magic pearls of wisdom. What's worked for me has been exercise, eating very high quality food that I cook myself with the best possible ingredients bought at local farmer's markets, and taking antabuse in the mornings. The last one is especially important, because prior to starting antabuse, I had multiple near misses, where I was telling myself I could have a couple glasses of wine, and very nearly started drinking again. Now I know that I can't have "a glass" or "a beer." I hardly ever think about alcohol anymore, it just isn't part of my life. I don't wake up and think about it, I just live my life.

My sobriety isn't 100% perfect. Sometimes I will drink four or five expressos, and then have a cigarette, so I get a buzz of manic energy. Of course I feel like crap afterwards. I've also smoked pot 3 or 4 times, but haven't taken that too far, as I hate the lifestyle that I used to lead as a lazy stoner. It sucked the initiative and impulsiveness out of me, and life was less interesting.

Post: #1377

(01-16-2016 06:55 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  For those of you who are thinking you may eventually do the same and are curious how that went, I wrote a blog post about it here: http://notesfrombeyond.com/self-developm...-from-here

Excellent blog post...thank you so much for that. It mirrors my experience almost exactly.

I finished my year wagon and felt like I'd really accomplished something, given how heavily I relied on booze for the last decade or so. And at first I thought I could handle it. The first few times I only got a little drunk. Beers only. None of the hard stuff.

And it was probably just a matter of days before I was right back to pounding the hard stuff and slipping into that glorious mindless void that I'd missed so much.

I was right back to where I started. The blackouts. The hangovers. The wallet with no money and ATM withdrawals at 3AM that I didn't remember making. And then it culminated in my first ever broken bone. At the age of 36. Yeah...."I can handle it."

And several months of stone cold "scared straight" sobriety followed. And inevitably, the cycle started again by being offered a beer at someone's house and I didn't want to be a rude guest and on it went.

But for some reason, this time, it only went on for a few weeks when I had another "what the fuck am I doing?" moment.

Got back on the wagon, and after getting a few solid weeks under my belt, it felt different this time. It feels like this is the one that's gonna stick. Cause I've been through the cycle so many times I know now without a doubt how it's gonna go EVERY SINGLE TIME I say "maybe I can handle it this time." Nah. I know better.

So this coming week will be 9 months for me on THIS wagon. But as I've said before, I really don't see myself hoisting a glass to celebrate when it's over. I really think this is it. And no, I'm not gonna lie...it's boring and I miss getting wasted as shit. I LOVE being wasted. But that's life. I'm done with all that. I'll just learn to deal with the boredom like an adult.

Post: #1378

(01-16-2016 06:55 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  I never made an update on my challenge, but I did complete the entire year with no drinking.

I went back to partying afterwards, as some of you may have noticed already. For those of you who are thinking you may eventually do the same and are curious how that went, I wrote a blog post about it here: http://notesfrombeyond.com/self-developm...-from-here

The tl;dr version is that the outlook for pacing myself was not good. It was quickly sending me back where I started and obviously a move in the wrong direction; I miss the sober life and the pride of being a man in full control of my health and my wits.

So as of now, I just wrapped up the latest bender and am correcting course and hopping back in for another year.

By the way, do we have a thread for guys who've made it past the one year and have decided to become teetotalers as a longer-term lifestyle choice? I think that would be a good idea to discuss some of the related issues without interrupting the momentum of the challenge here. Perhaps unnecessary given that it gets easier over time but just a thought.

BB, thank you for this post. I've been hoping you would post an update on your 1 year wagon. I'm very happy to hear that you completed it, and this also allows me to give you a grossly overdue rep point. Don't ask me why it couldn't be done before -- I have a solemn relation to declared wagons and feel that my hands are tied until their announced successful completion. I hope I am permitted this one weakness.

I am also happy to hear about your decision to restart the wagon, and I feel that you will see even greater and longer-lasting benefits this time around. Is today (January 16) your new start date?

Post: #1379

^ Yessir - January 16th it is.

Thank you for the rep point, and no explanation necessary.

I admire the commitment you've made to supporting this challenge.

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Rudyard Kipling

Post: #1380

(01-16-2016 11:44 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  ^ Yessir - January 16th it is.

Thank you for the rep point, and no explanation necessary.

I admire the commitment you've made to supporting this challenge.

Thanks BB. Welcome back aboard as of January 16, 2016 and hope to hear more from you here as time goes on.

Post: #1381

@Beyond Borders: Very nice blog post, I can definitely identify with a lot of the things you mention. When I was at the one year mark a couple of weeks ago I was a bit torn whether to continue the wagon. And I had some very similar thoughts to your experiences. Actually when I fell of my first wagon in 2014 after a couple of months and started drinking again I noticed the same thing. At first it was a few beers and everything was going great but fast forward a few months and I'm blackout drunk in some after hour place in the morning wondering why it has gotten out of control this fast.
So thanks for your honest post!

Post: #1382

Beyond Borders,

I read your update post with great interest, and I want to thank you for writing it. It was bracing to see you note how a mere few months back on the sauce have begun to give you a noticeably older and more tired look after the period of youthful health vouchsafed by the wagon; hard drinking and a dissipated life really are brutal on the body past a young age, and the effects can be rapid. I'm very happy that you are taking early and decisive action to counteract this. As you say, you will see the physical gains made on the wagon swiftly restored -- and that is something you should take real pleasure in as it happens. Waking up every morning feeling rested, refreshed and ready for the day is something that we take for granted until it's taken away by either bad luck or our own abuses; but it should be fully relished for the immeasurable boon that it is, if we are fortunate enough to be able to recapture it.

I'd like to address two other points raised in your post. The first is what you write about "procrastination" and how the wagon did not, by itself, help you to solve this problem; and the second is the irritability and impatience with others that you noted in yourself towards the end of the wagon. Both of these are interesting observations and they deserve some attention.

First: I don't believe it is either useful or accurate to think of something like procrastination as a "demon" that you need to confront, or the sign of some inner "emptiness" or a "gap in your life", etc. I feel that people too often think in this way, and it leads them in a direction of psychological introspection and rumination that is not necessarily helpful to solving their perceived, and actual, problems; it leads them to believe that they need to transform their entire person at some hidden depth. Whereas in reality the problems that need to be treated are both of a simpler nature, and often less dire, than is usually imagined.

As far as this issue of procrastination goes. It is something that I often hear men, in particular, talk about and beat themselves up over. Yet these men, almost without exception, are able to support themselves, have a roof over their heads and a reasonable income, and manage to perform a decent amount of work. If they really are "procrastinators", I ask myself: how bad is the problem, really? It certainly does not seem to be fatal. I feel that a great deal -- not all, but a great deal -- of the ubiquitous anxiety about procrastination comes from men holding themselves, their brains and their bodies to an unreasonable standard, and from an excessive fear of "mediocrity" -- that bugaboo of all earnest male minds.

Everywhere we are told, with the utmost solemnity, to flee from "mediocrity" at all costs. But the result, in almost all cases, in not really more work or greater accomplishment; it is usually just more stress and self-flagellation. Most of us live well enough, and work more or less hard enough; but instead of enjoying the fruits of our labors and relishing those labors in the occasional periods when we are inspired to do so, we live in fear that it's never enough, and we constantly punish ourselves for the supposed vice of laziness -- even as we make only the most sporadic and unsustainable efforts to rectify this ostensible failing.

Paradoxically, I think the first step towards solving this problem of procrastination is to relax about it, as much as you can. Realize that, by definition, since you have managed to do enough to support yourself without relying on the mercies of others or on charity, you've really done enough and therefore whatever problem you think you have is not dire, not a catastrophe or a "demon" that you need to battle. Doing more work than is necessary to support oneself is not something that any rational or sensible person does willingly; and the failure to do it is a sign of recognition of the most basic realities of life, not of some fatal flaw in our spirits. The one thing that is really dumb and that can make an otherwise enjoyable life into a hellish one if allowed to get out of hand is the tendency to beat up and berate ourselves just because we are normal human beings. Let go of it, and suddenly there is more time in the day for other things -- including even the occasional extra efforts and labors when one is so disposed!

A great deal of work -- even the so-called "creative" work of the writer -- is a chore, rather than a delight; and a great deal of it is also wasted. Most books that get written would have been best left unwritten. And conversely, a great deal of what passes for mere idle distraction, things like randomly browsing the web, watching a movie, sitting around and talking to other people -- are things very much worth doing and sources of beauty, interest, and insight. To blame oneself for preferring the latter over the former is not only useless -- it can also be a misunderstanding of what is of value. It is no accident that many of our best and ultimately most productive ideas come from the times that would be conventionally considered wasteful or mere distractions, but are in fact times when our mind is relatively free to roam and to apprehend the world (unless, of course, it is poisoned and paralyzed by the guilt and anxiety that is the only true waste).

Finally, to the extent that it really may be useful for a man to do more work than is absolutely necessary -- to build up a greater measure of financial security, or to achieve other goals -- the best way to address this is simply by the formation of modest but persistent habits. Don't beat yourself up, don't battle inner demons, and don't be excessively and uselessly ambitious; but introduce, gradually and over time, a few not excessively onerous habits that go some way towards achieving your goal. If you need to discipline yourself to do freelance work, make sure you do this for, say, an hour every day of the week but one (always good to give oneself one full day off). Of course some days it may be much more than an hour, but you can always do an hour; so just do it, always at the same time, and be happy when it's done, no matter how much or how little was accomplished. Little habits like that build on themselves; the key is to adopt them gradually, in a way that is not overwhelming. Over time, that will always do the trick -- to the extent, again, that this is even necessary.

I would also refer anyone interested in this to Nemencine's fantastic post on habit formation. I highly recommend it.

This post turned out to be long enough that I will continue to address the second point I wanted to make in a follow-up post.

Post: #1383

In this post I'd like to address another point brought up in BB's wagon update. I'll quote the relevant passage:

Quote:Another interesting dynamic I noticed with my year of sobriety was that near the end I was becoming more cynical and impatient with people – online moreso than anywhere else. It became increasingly difficult for me to post on the RVF, for example, without losing my patience. I’m not really sure why that is, so I guess it’s something I’ll need to evaluate moving forward.

First, I should say that I have found BB to be one of the most unfailingly polite and civilized posters here, so I'll have to take him at his word when he speaks about this irritability and impatience. And I think there are periods when this forum -- like any other community, or the city where one has made one's home -- can test anyone's patience, so the feeling may well have been amply justified. Nevertheless, and with these caveats, I think it brings up a point that is worth discussing.

One of the things that drinkers love best about alcohol -- and that it really does provide when it's going right -- is the soft focus that it brings to our relations to other people and to our view of them. It is something that I believe to be unique to alcohol and is part of what makes it such a beloved drug. This soft focus is not the same as the distortion and derangement introduced by certain other drugs; it is not like the blissful indifference of the opiates, or the cold energies of cocaine, the amiable goofiness of pot, or the indiscriminate puppy love of something like ecstasy. It does not prevent us from seeing the flaws and shortcomings of others, but it casts them in a rich and warm light that also seems to bring other people close to us. This soft focus and this rich warmth are often evident in the written and spoken expressions of serious drinkers when they are at their height; and I believe it is one of the great secret loves and pleasures of men who love the sauce, and one of the things that keeps them coming back to it again and again.

This soft focus and this warmth and richness can appear to be lost on the wagon. I've often referred in this thread to the long wagon periods that can be characterized by dryness and a kind of fallowness; these can seem like mere words, but they reflect a reality that is not pleasant when it is actually experienced. One looks out of the wagon and it seems as if there is nothing but desert as far as the eye can see; there is no relieving moisture or haze in any of the outlines, all objects and passersby are featured too starkly, their profiles are jarring. One feels heat in the day or cold at night, but there is never a warmth that one can repose in. That is the time when one experiences near-constant irritability and impatience; and it can last for a long while -- and then recur.

There are good posts earlier in this thread about physical steps that can be taken to relieve this kind of wagon irritability; massage, in particular, is an excellent modality and should not be overlooked. But beyond that, the only counsel is patience; that and the trust that life will come to you in the fulness of time if you let it -- if you are strong enough and patient enough to just keep going.

Even that sensation of rich warmth and soft focus in relation to the world that so characterizes drinking at its best -- even that can come back and be restored; but only as an occasional experience, not as one's default mode of perception. And that is really as it should be. It is right to see other people, with their flaws and virtues, in the steady light of day that should really be the eye's constant companion; superior, as such, to both the overly caustic desert light of certain wagon passages, and the slightly washed-out haze of drunkenness. It is right for that to be one's default mode; and it is right for the other mode, for the slight haze of the soft focus lens, to be the kind of passing and intermittent experience that it naturally is.

That special warmth and richness in the relation to others should occur in the occasional transports of feeling and sensibility where it belongs; it is one of the ultimate vulgarities of the drinker that he wishes to extend these occasions and make them into something that can be brought forth a little too mechanically and reliably. And for this he has to pay with a period of extended drought; but it is what allows the balance to be achieved as the journey goes on. One's dues, unfortunately, have to be paid and it's not always a pleasant process -- but the wagon must go through the desert if it is ever to reach the waters of the Pacific. There is no way around it.

Post: #1384

Wonderful words of wisdom as always LoZ.

Post: #1385

BB, I am glad to hear you are renewing your wagon. Also, excellent write up on the perspective you had regarding sobriety for a year and subsequently continuing drinking again. I figured if I did resume alcohol again I would find myself reaching the same conclusions you had in your article.

I wanted to address something that BB wrote in his ability to not have any problems staying sober while he was on the wagon. As someone who has hung out with BB, I think I can understand one reason this is not an issue for him and how it may help others.

BB is very modest in his writing about his social skills as his exceptional ability to talk up a stranger and to win people over in a few words is something I have only witnessed in maybe one or two other people in my life. He has shared some tips for others in this article. But for guys on the wagon, even if you have good social skills, it is a real advantage to think about any ways you can improve in that area. In social interactions involving alcohol few people will ever suspect you are sober if you are the first one to start up a conversation, sing karaoke, or pull a girl from her friends to dance with you. By putting yourself out there with strangers and not being reserved from doing fun things you might have only done drunk before, a wagoner will find his sober social gatherings much more comfortable.


@ LOZ as always you have a way of challenging the way I think of things. I sometimes find that I am being hard on myself for spending a day just reading the web or vegging out on a TV series. I guess its important to look at my life in perspective. and when I do that those days of "laziness" are more than justified.

Post: #1386

(01-17-2016 01:40 AM)bacon Wrote:  BB is very modest in his writing about his social skills as his exceptional ability to talk up a stranger and to win people over in a few words is something I have only witnessed in maybe one or two other people in my life. He has shared some tips for others in this article.

bacon, that post by Beyond Borders is extraordinary. It's one of the finest things I've ever read on how to be social and how to relate to other people. It's a beautiful and truthful text from the first word to the last, and it deserves to be widely read. Thank you for linking to it.

Post: #1387

Nine months today. In the time since I had my last drink, a human baby could have been conceived and born.

Feeling fine. Interesting to think I'm 3/4 of the way through a year, but I don't plan on starting up again this time, so I'm not really "counting down" to the one year mark. Well, not in a "I can't wait to drink again" way, but I AM looking forward to it being spring.

Good god I hate the winter.

Post: #1388

Been clean for 2 months now and I can say that gym exercise has helped a lot. I'm following a workout guide put out from 50 Cent where it's 2-3 cardio days + 2-3 lifting days a week. It's helped me lose a bit of weight since I gained about 30lbs last yr. Since there's a bottleshop right next to gym, I used to go there in the past. With all the gym work, I dont even bother with going there now.

Started seeing better sleep patterns now, and spending a lot less money now than a few months ago. I still remember drinking those 350ml bottles of cheap rum and vodka 3 nights a week for 8 months and eating Mcdonalds or KFC first thing in the morning to suppress the hangover. I felt so awful doing it but could never understand why I couldn't stop until I stumbled across this thread.

Feeling a lot better now

Post: #1389

(01-20-2016 08:21 PM)Kizman Wrote:  Been clean for 2 months now and I can say that gym exercise has helped a lot. I'm following a workout guide put out from 50 Cent where it's 2-3 cardio days + 2-3 lifting days a week. It's helped me lose a bit of weight since I gained about 30lbs last yr. Since there's a bottleshop right next to gym, I used to go there in the past. With all the gym work, I dont even bother with going there now.

Started seeing better sleep patterns now, and spending a lot less money now than a few months ago. I still remember drinking those 350ml bottles of cheap rum and vodka 3 nights a week for 8 months and eating Mcdonalds or KFC first thing in the morning to suppress the hangover. I felt so awful doing it but could never understand why I couldn't stop until I stumbled across this thread.

Feeling a lot better now

Kizman, that's really great to hear. I loved this post. Keep it up brother.

Post: #1390

(01-20-2016 08:27 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  Kizman, that's really great to hear. I loved this post. Keep it up brother.

Thanks for the support man. I appreciate it.

Post: #1391

About six weeks into the wagon. I've lost 12 lbs so far and have been sleeping great. The cutting group is a big part of my success. I've been lifting heavy 4 days a week and had consistent motivation through the group messaging. It helps that a handful of the guys are on the wagon too.

The wagon has been super easy until the past few days or so. I've seen my beer belly melt away and I've made consistent gains in the gym. My energy and attitude has been great as well. But in the past few days, the cravings have started hitting me pretty hard. I hadn't craved alcohol at all until recently. I think it's taken this long for my brain to forget the negatives and focus solely on the positive(alleged) aspects of drinking. I've been noticing beer billboards, commercials, etc. a lot more lately.

I think the novelty of the wagon has wore off and reality is starting to hit me. I had a friend say, "You've taken a long enough break, let's grab a beer after work and shoot some pool." I politely declined but I can't say that I 100% disagreed with his statement. The thought of celebrating my success thus far with some booze has crossed my mind a handful of times. I'm telling myself things like, "You've taken a long enough break to prove that you can do it. Drinking will only become an occasional thing now due to the cutting group and calorie tracking." These thoughts don't persist but they have come and gone more than once.

I'm not going to fold. The cravings aren't severe. But they are worth acknowledging. Today I went on a long walk instead of thinking about them and felt much better afterward. I think being cooped up for the winter is a big part of them appearing. Previous winters I would stay in and drink because there was nothing else to do and the lack of sunlight is depressing as fuck. The sun is finally starting to set after 5 pm so hopefully spring will be right around the corner.

Post: #1392

wi30, I've been having the same cravings too. Just as you described. The little devil starts whispering, "It's ok to have some, you've done such a great job. You deserve it. Just tonight, it's no big deal, and you don't have to tell anyone. No one has to know"

And it's a very smooth talking devil. But I know it wouldn't stop with just one night, and now after 4 months I'm starting to see things. Just a couple days ago I've had the sense my head has been covered with Saran-wrap. If you look through Saran-wrap it's very blurry and suffocating. I still have it, but I've finally noticed it's there and been there for a long time. I'm hoping with more days of sobriety the Saran-wrap will start to dissolve and I'll be able to see even more clearly, breath more clearly, and live more clearly.

Every morning I wake up, I remark to myself, "Mmmmm....Now that was a great night's sleep. I feel so good. So much more alive."

But the devil is still here with me, and I don't think he'll ever go away. I just need to live him, but not give in to him.

Post: #1393

I'm starting a mini-wagon of my own. It's a matter of weeks for me, not years. I haven't consumed any alcohol since Monday and plan to not have any until 2 weeks from now. I'm noticing my head is much clearer now. Eating right and exercising are so much easier. I have more willpower, in general.

I could not go more than a month without alcohol, however.

(01-30-2016 06:56 PM)wi30 Wrote:  I think the novelty of the wagon has wore off and reality is starting to hit me. I had a friend say, "You've taken a long enough break, let's grab a beer after work and shoot some pool." I politely declined but I can't say that I 100% disagreed with his statement. The thought of celebrating my success thus far with some booze has crossed my mind a handful of times. I'm telling myself things like, "You've taken a long enough break to prove that you can do it. Drinking will only become an occasional thing now due to the cutting group and calorie tracking." These thoughts don't persist but they have come and gone more than once..

So you wouldn't join your friend at a bar and drink apple juice or something? I'm contemplating trying something like that some day.

Post: #1394

(01-30-2016 10:43 PM)Thoughtcrime Wrote:  I could not go more than a month without alcohol, however.

Couldn't or wouldn't?

If you really don't think you can, all the more reason to do it...

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Rudyard Kipling

Post: #1395

(01-30-2016 11:07 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

(01-30-2016 10:43 PM)Thoughtcrime Wrote:  I could not go more than a month without alcohol, however.

Couldn't or wouldn't?

If you really don't think you can, all the more reason to do it...

So true.

'I can't talk to that girl at the bar, she's with her boyfriend' - Answer: approach the girl and see what happens
'I can't gain muscle I have bad genetics' - Answer: eat properly and lift for a year and see what happens
'I can't go more than a month without alcohol' - Answer: don't drink for a day, don't drink for a week... and see what happens

If you tell yourself you can't do something you owe it to yourself to at least try.

Post: #1396

(01-30-2016 10:43 PM)Thoughtcrime Wrote:  So you wouldn't join your friend at a bar and drink apple juice or something? I'm contemplating trying something like that some day.

I already had other plans that evening. I've gone out and drove multiple times since joining the wagon. Going out is actually really cheap when you aren't buying overpriced drinks.

Post: #1397

(01-31-2016 09:48 AM)wi30 Wrote:  

(01-30-2016 10:43 PM)Thoughtcrime Wrote:  So you wouldn't join your friend at a bar and drink apple juice or something? I'm contemplating trying something like that some day.

I already had other plans that evening. I've gone out and drove multiple times since joining the wagon. Going out is actually really cheap when you aren't buying overpriced drinks.

I went out a few times for some night gaming without drinking: wow are bars lame without a few gin and tonics. I sometimes go a few months without a drink and don't think about it much, I don't have a very strong addiction tendency to anything like drugs, smoking, booze, but when I go out and not drink its so damn boring. For anyone who can do it, much respect!

Do you have any tips for how to have more fun at bars sober? Should I bring some card games or juggle or something like Mystery?

Post: #1398

I always had to be shitfaced to cope with going to most bars or clubs. I hate loud pop music and dancing so I would have to almost blackout to enjoy myself.

If you are the designated driver, no one is going to push drinks on you and you can mingle with others who aren't drinking or drinking much. I was surprised at how many people weren't fucked up because drunk me always assumed everyone else was on my level.

I enjoy playing darts, pool, or hanging out at taverns or pubs instead of big bars and clubs. I've spent much less time in them since I go to bed early now.

But standing in a circle with a group of friends yelling over music wasn't fun drunk or sober. Playing something or watching a game with buddies is fun both drunk and sober.

Post: #1399

(01-30-2016 10:43 PM)Thoughtcrime Wrote:  I'm starting a mini-wagon of my own. It's a matter of weeks for me, not years. I haven't consumed any alcohol since Monday and plan to not have any until 2 weeks from now. I'm noticing my head is much clearer now. Eating right and exercising are so much easier. I have more willpower, in general.

I could not go more than a month without alcohol, however.

Good for you. One step at a time. You don't run a marathon 26 miles at a time, you do it bit by bit.

Stay focused on your two weeks.

At the end of it, see how you feel. Consider extending your mini wagon for another two weeks, or maybe even take the plunge for a month long wagon.

Once you get there, evaluate, and see what your next step is.

Easy does it.

Post: #1400

I've just completed a 2 week money tracking spreadsheet to see where all my money goes. I spent $504 and $250 of it has gone to alcohol. That's definitely an eye sore.