Annnnd here comes the trade off. I ended up staying in bed pretty much all day, didnt leave the apartment. Now I am sitting here feeling depressed and questioning life.... while at this time last night while I was drinking and having fun at the hostel I was thinking to myself "Life is good, its times like this I will never forget!"

(01-06-2015 08:57 PM)Cr33pin Wrote:  Annnnd here comes the trade off. I ended up staying in bed pretty much all day, didnt leave the apartment. Now I am sitting here feeling depressed and questioning life.... while at this time last night while I was drinking and having fun at the hostel I was thinking to myself "Life is good, its times like this I will never forget!"

I remember that. Drinking and getting stoned stopped being a part of my life when I realized that moments like "life is good!!!11!!!" were getting shorter and shorter relative to the oh crap I'm depressed and low on motivation and energy life sucks moments, which got longer and longer and worse and worse.

(01-06-2015 08:57 PM)Cr33pin Wrote:  Annnnd here comes the trade off. I ended up staying in bed pretty much all day, didnt leave the apartment. Now I am sitting here feeling depressed and questioning life.... while at this time last night while I was drinking and having fun at the hostel I was thinking to myself "Life is good, its times like this I will never forget!"

At least you're having good times while you're out partying and hooking up with girls.

Many guys say that they would kill to be in your position.

But a lot of times, many of us trick ourselves into the "grass is greener" mindset.

If you're working on your own business - you're also questioning if you should be partying and socializing more often. If you're getting wasted all the time, you're also resenting people who wake up early in the morning and kick ass.

Sometimes having so many options in life isn't the greatest. It isn't necessarily what makes us happiest.

But just focusing in on particular goals and accomplishing them can do wonders for your psyche. Maybe you can start writing out particular things that you want to accomplish - and then take action. You'll feel better about yourself.

I haven't drank in 3 months, specifically to save my skin.

I just turned 28, I realized if I want to look young and date 18-24yr olds for many years ahead, I need to stop destroying my body. I dont want my face to look shitty due to drinking.
Im doing the full year, then after that only in party situations with hot tail around.

I used to drink alone all the time, almost every night before going to bed to get a little buzz, it's very relaxing but a hard habit to kick. I fucking love drinking and listening to music, it's so enjoyable but I need to quit for a while.

I've started as of the 1st. The moment I realised I had a problem was when I feel down a flight of stairs at a strip club and broke my thumb. I had to play a gig the next day so went immediately home, but didnt realised I played bass with a broken thumb until an xray 3 weeks later.

I've noticed a dramatic productivity increase when it comes to my personal business and been I've able to utilise down time at my day job to work on it which I've put to good use while everyone else in the office is trying to fill their time with browsing facebook and Imgur.

In the last 2 days I have noticed I'm getting really tired. Not sure whether it is a detox thing, which usually results in me getting really sick. It's as if once i stop poisoning my body my body finally has a chance to fuck up on me.

Got a gig coming up this weekend where I will be performing stone cold sober for the first time I can remember. Will see how it goes.

(01-07-2015 01:06 AM)Disco_Volante Wrote:  I haven't drank in 3 months, specifically to save my skin.

I just turned 28, I realized if I want to look young and date 18-24yr olds for many years ahead, I need to stop destroying my body. I dont want my face to look shitty due to drinking.
Im doing the full year, then after that only in party situations with hot tail around.

I used to drink alone all the time, almost every night before going to bed to get a little buzz, it's very relaxing but a hard habit to kick. I fucking love drinking and listening to music, it's so enjoyable but I need to quit for a while.

Good thing you stopped when you did. I went the whole route of tapering down and withdrawals and let me tell everyone that it was absolute misery. It was three months before i could even begin trying to put myself together post alcohol and over a year later i'm coping with PAWS and am just beginning to build up a new life for myself.

Coming up on 2 months. There was downtime recently due to frigid weather, post-Christmastime and the day after New Years falling on a Friday. Came so close to stepping out to get fucking loaded and perv-out subpar tail/watch the college football playoffs, but chose to stay in, get sleep, and workout the next day. More than just that, like Disco_Volante, the temptation to booze and listen to music at home was powerful as well. First big test passed...

More than 8 months on the wagon, I haven't jerking off or looking at porn for 5 days now, for discipline reason.

This virility is something, I must say

I went out that night the girl invited me to the club. I didn't drink but I bought my buddy a drink and told him to give me he bottle when he was done so I could just hold a beer bottle. I feel less like some kind of outsider when I'm at least holding a beer. Then we bounced to another club and it sucked so we went back and I garbed this dudes half full beer of his table while he was dancing and just held it jaja.

It sucked though... the loud club packed with hot bitches just sucked not drinking. I feel maybe I am getting to old for clubs but on the other hand the last two times I went to the clubs and was drinking I had blast and ended up owning the place.

It just comes down to figuring out whats more important and whats a better fit for me. I think I will just swear off alcholol but then I think about having some wine on the beach with a cool girl on mini vacation or something... and that doesnt sound so bad. But its a slippery slope....

Really I think beer is the most toxic... I always feel worse when drinking a lot of beer as compared to some mixed drinks or shots

i went out last Thursday and didn't drink a lot, max like 4 drinks, felt a slight buzz. Had an awesome night getting numbers and stuff. But the reason I didn't drink a lot was cause I had work the next day so I didnt. Fucking Friday night comes around and I'm shit faced with 0 results and 200 dollars blown. The only girl I approached was one just after my first drink. I'm lost and don't know what to do. I like drinking it's fun at the club, when I'm totally sober I just feel like a loser out of place and I don't wanna do anything. But I don't wanna drink anymore for obvious reasons.

(01-11-2015 09:58 AM)-eWf Wrote:  i went out last Thursday and didn't drink a lot, max like 4 drinks, felt a slight buzz. Had an awesome night getting numbers and stuff. But the reason I didn't drink a lot was cause I had work the next day so I didnt. Fucking Friday night comes around and I'm shit faced with 0 results and 200 dollars blown. The only girl I approached was one just after my first drink. I'm lost and don't know what to do. I like drinking it's fun at the club, when I'm totally sober I just feel like a loser out of place and I don't wanna do anything. But I don't wanna drink anymore for obvious reasons.

You already have the answer.

When you are out looking for girls, keep it to four drinks. If you are just out to drink, go for it.

(01-11-2015 09:58 AM)-eWf Wrote:  i went out last Thursday and didn't drink a lot, max like 4 drinks, felt a slight buzz. Had an awesome night getting numbers and stuff. But the reason I didn't drink a lot was cause I had work the next day so I didnt. Fucking Friday night comes around and I'm shit faced with 0 results and 200 dollars blown. The only girl I approached was one just after my first drink. I'm lost and don't know what to do. I like drinking it's fun at the club, when I'm totally sober I just feel like a loser out of place and I don't wanna do anything. But I don't wanna drink anymore for obvious reasons.

I had the same problem. Two solutions:

-Don't go out, focus on online and/or daygame.

-If you do go out and can't stay sober, alter between Bud Light and water. Bud Light is fucking piss, not something I would call beer, but that's what's good about it in this sutuation. You can't get drunk unless you drink a shit ton of it, especially if you also order water. It's also much cheaper than cocktails.

(01-09-2015 07:27 PM)Cr33pin Wrote:  It just comes down to figuring out whats more important and whats a better fit for me. I think I will just swear off alcholol but then I think about having some wine on the beach with a cool girl on mini vacation or something... and that doesnt sound so bad. But its a slippery slope....

Really I think beer is the most toxic... I always feel worse when drinking a lot of beer as compared to some mixed drinks or shots

This sounds familiar to what I'm going through right now. I need to stop drinking because it causes problems in my life. Feel less energy the next day, desire to eat impulsively and bad when buzzed, don't work out the next day, etc.

I'm now drinking red wine only because it's supposed to be the lesser of all evils. There are even articles praising the health benefits of having a glass or two a day. I drink a bottle though (5 glasses) a day in the evening after work.

I rationalize it as, "Well, at least I'm not drinking a pint of bourbon", which would be easy, but the end effects are the same. Binge eating, feel like shit the next day and all the rest.

I tell myself I'm just in transition right now. New job, new apt, starting over again in life I guess. A lot of stress. It's like re-potting a plant, a shock to the system occurs, and I'm using alcohol as medication, but like any pain killer it's a double edged sword that will cut against you when you abuse it. When you use it to fill the void, the abyss and emptiness that occurs when we are by ourselves whether alone in our apt or alone in a club.

Alcohol is the precious and it's very hard to let it go. To stand tall and strong on our own two feet while the waves of life's negativity and emptiness crash against you with little rest in between. So tempting to go running for the shelter of a Mother's little helper. Isn't daily, routine drinking just that? A flight to the boosom of the Mother to give us that feeling of warmth, happiness and love.

That's not a very masculine act. In fact it reaks of femininity. Perhaps that's why wives always get angry with their husband drinking, like in the old comic strip "Andy Capp". They know on some level alcohol is their husbands mistress.

God, I really want to quit all together, but doing so will mean having to quit aspects of my life that revolve around alcohol. My Father was an alcoholic and drug dealer/addict. He was very successful at it, both the dealing and the using.

After he got busted and did his time he went into AA, got clean and was so till the end of his days. Instead of dealing drugs he became a dealer in estate sales. Was again very successful at both.

Neil Young said, "Every junkie is like a setting sun". I like to think what he meant was the addict is a person of fearless passion, but it's misdirected and as such wasted, so they become the setting sun (darkness) instead of the rising sun (awareness).

I wonder what I could do, how my life could be if I could give up drinking.

(01-11-2015 05:15 PM)Onto Wrote:  I wonder what I could do, how my life could be if I could give up drinking.

I imagine a lot better then you think, but theres a transition period that really is hard and makes you wonder why you cut out drinking or thinking to yourself "Oh a few drinks wont hurt".... then you just end up back where you started.

ITs tough man, everyone is different.

I have a friend who with the help of Antabuse medication has quit drinking. He has been a hard drinker for 20 years and almost died in a motorcycle accident last year. Even with that close call with death and swearing off drinking he still had difficulty quitting drinking on his own.

But with the Antabuse medication he is staying on the wagon. This medication works by making you very ill if you drink even a little bit. You have it in your system for 2 weeks and even if you stop taking it you can't resume drinking over the next week or so without getting ill. Its really helped him maintain sobriety and is something to consider for people who don't have the ability to quit drinking on your own. However its recommended that anyone interested in taking the medication see a doctor before taking it to make sure you are in good enough health for it.

Cr33pin,

Reading your posts on this thread, my feeling is that you should either commit to the wagon for this year -- and then stop resenting it and musing about all the great drinks you could have -- or just let go of the idea for now and revisit it when you're ready.

The way to go into a 1 year drinking wagon is to make a serious commitment that you stake your pride on and which is not something that is revisited day by day. Of course there will be times, both early and late, when this makes you unhappy, or bored, or dejected -- and these are, in fact, the times that make you and that allow the true benefits of the wagon to start ripening. But it cannot be a matter of day-to-day doubt or indecision about the course you've chosen.

My sense is that you still want to get more drinks in, and that you would resent the wagon if you jumped on right now. So perhaps it is best to let go of the idea for now, and revisit it when the time is right -- and I do think you will revisit it again when it's all said and done; once the idea of the wagon takes root in a man's mind, it is not so easily dislodged and its (seemingly less than seductive) appeal tends to grow stronger over time. But it's important to get enough of those drinks in that you don't go on the wagon with resentment; regret or unhappiness, maybe, but no resentment -- that is key.

But if you do choose to commit to it now, then commit absolutely. Name a start date, and after that date it can no longer be a matter of going back and forth. You stake your pride on it, and you take whatever punishment is meted out, no matter how forced, unnatural, or depressing it may all feel at times. You just endure those times, and trust that it is both necessary and rewarding to do so. But in any case, once you've made the decision, how you feel at any given moment no longer really matters.

(01-07-2015 10:31 PM)pialo Wrote:  I've started as of the 1st. The moment I realised I had a problem was when I feel down a flight of stairs at a strip club and broke my thumb. I had to play a gig the next day so went immediately home, but didnt realised I played bass with a broken thumb until an xray 3 weeks later.

I've noticed a dramatic productivity increase when it comes to my personal business and been I've able to utilise down time at my day job to work on it which I've put to good use while everyone else in the office is trying to fill their time with browsing facebook and Imgur.

In the last 2 days I have noticed I'm getting really tired. Not sure whether it is a detox thing, which usually results in me getting really sick. It's as if once i stop poisoning my body my body finally has a chance to fuck up on me.

Got a gig coming up this weekend where I will be performing stone cold sober for the first time I can remember. Will see how it goes.

pialo, are you in for the full year?

(01-12-2015 02:20 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  Cr33pin,

Reading your posts on this thread, my feeling is that you should either commit to the wagon for this year -- and then stop resenting it and musing about all the great drinks you could have -- or just let go of the idea for now and revisit it when you're ready.

The way to go into a 1 year drinking wagon is to make a serious commitment that you stake your pride on and which is not something that is revisited day by day. Of course there will be times, both early and late, when this makes you unhappy, or bored, or dejected -- and these are, in fact, the times that make you and that allow the true benefits of the wagon to start ripening. But it cannot be a matter of day-to-day doubt or indecision about the course you've chosen.

My sense is that you still want to get more drinks in, and that you would resent the wagon if you jumped on right now. So perhaps it is best to let go of the idea for now, and revisit it when the time is right -- and I do think you will revisit it again when it's all said and done; once the idea of the wagon takes root in a man's mind, it is not so easily dislodged and its (seemingly less than seductive) appeal tends to grow stronger over time. But it's important to get enough of those drinks in that you don't go on the wagon with resentment; regret or unhappiness, maybe, but no resentment -- that is key.

But if you do choose to commit to it now, then commit absolutely. Name a start date, and after that date it can no longer be a matter of going back and forth. You stake your pride on it, and you take whatever punishment is meted out, no matter how forced, unnatural, or depressing it may all feel at times. You just endure those times, and trust that it is both necessary and rewarding to do so. But in any case, once you've made the decision, how you feel at any given moment no longer really matters.

(01-11-2015 05:15 PM)Onto Wrote:  I wonder what I could do, how my life could be if I could give up drinking.

Onto,

The only way to find out is to commit to it -- for a year, to give your brain a clear and concrete sense of how far away the earliest possible drink is -- and then do it. There is nothing you can really understand by wondering; it has to be gone through.

Take a year and see where you are after that year. It might surprise you -- but the changes take time, so you have to give them time.

I've said it before, but I'll say it again: You are an inspiration Lizard of Oz.

Strong post as usual.

I'm still here. 6 days away from 5 months on the wagon. This entire month has sucked big time for me. I work, sleep, repeat, am injured, sick, pissed off at the world and lonely. Its dark and cold outside and I have nothing to look forward to the entire day.

The surprising thing about all of it is that despite all of this I don't feel the need to drink. It's so clear in my mind that drinking would only make everything worse that I don't even consider the option.

I suffer silently (well, apart from this post I guess), count the days, and trust in the glory of the coming spring. Both figuratively and literally.

Come end of April I will take two months off and relax someplace in Ukraine. It's gonna be fantastic.

3 months in today (90 days)

Feeling pretty good. However, my tolerance for being around people drinking is at an all time low.

Just dropping a message to tell I joined to the challenge two weeks ago. It will be interesting to see how I feel after a month or two. Keep up the good work guys!

(01-13-2015 06:55 PM)Monxp Wrote:  Just dropping a message to tell I joined to the challenge two weeks ago. It will be interesting to see how I feel after a month or two. Keep up the good work guys!

Monxp, I assume you are in for the full year? If so please post your official start date.

I've decided I might just do my own challenge.

Pretty much everytime I go on a date with a new girl I always drink with them before I try to bang. Its just standard routine for me, go to a bar next door to my place, easy pull back to mine. Definitely not gonna cut that out, that's only like 2 drinks anyway, and I always keep a bottle of vodka green apple in my room for when they come back to my place, easy drink.


But I've decided to see how I go in the clubs/nightlife when I'm on the hunt for new girls to stop the drink and remain sober. My raw confidence has significantly decreased ever since I started drinking heavy and relied on the alcohol to push me - decreasing my natural confidence to 0. It's funny how back when I first started drinking my confidence boosted to crazy levels and I was doing crazy shit, these days alki doesn't give me that effect because my natural state of sober is so bad. Quit it and try to build the natural sober state back up again. This even relates to my confidence during the day.

I'm starting the challenge for 2015. Been going strong for about a week.

I don't drink very often, but when I do drink way too much.

It fucks up my whole next day. I get moody, eat way too much, and mostly don't enjoy life anymore.

I don't really think I enjoy drinking that much either, it's mostly out of social pressure and a desire to let go.

Will be interesting to see how it goes.