Post: #1726

(01-17-2017 07:32 PM)questor70 Wrote:  

(01-17-2017 07:25 PM)Vaun Wrote:  I really hate that song, and the guy singing it.

Read back in the thread for evidence that you still aren't 100% over this girl, rebound bangs or no rebound bangs. Until you get there, you still have more in common with that song and its whiny singer than you'd like to admit. So at the very least, use your distate for it as a motivator to get over the hump.

I think the difference with what happened to you is very different. She never cut me off, she just broke up with me. She would pick up my calls and answered my texts, until I walked away. I could very well still be entangled with her if I didnt. I made the choice to cut myself off. No woman has ever "blocked me", like this whiny song says. Of which I can't identify with in the slightest.

Post: #1727

(01-14-2017 10:12 AM)TheMaleBrain Wrote:  Totally agree.
When we were young, everything would get me hard.
Also I share a similar experience. I currently spin 2 regular plates (LTR status) and #2 girl usually "passes out" during sex and needs recovery time. #1 girl is usually in better shape but occasionally also needs rest.
I eat healthy and lots of proteins. I noticed a lot of people eating mostly carbs and how they lack energy. That is also a factor.
Also. if you are doing it regularly (4-5 times a week) your body get accustomed to it. If you are not getting any, you probably need to get use to it first.

Hmm.. I guess, need to regularize this to my 5/6 am 7 habits life.
[/quote]

I wake up every morning at either 5 AM (to go to the gym and swim) or 6 AM (when my kids are with me and I send them to school).
My preference is mLTR, or in "dry spells" a pLTR and side plates.
This will not be an overnight thing. Getting there took me a few month from when I started (you can read it in my introduction).
I understand you get frustrated sometimes, but you can do it.

Post: #1728

Sorry Vaun, I don't mean to be rude.

You are killing this thread about this ex girl.

It is over, now move on.

We have ALL been there.

Post: #1729

(01-18-2017 01:05 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  Sorry Vaun, I don't mean to be rude.

You are killing this thread about this ex girl.

It is over, now move on.

We have ALL been there.

I'm done posting, thinking and talking about this. Obviously there are many here who want to talk about this and its an aspect of game no one really discusses. The advice was very helpful and I appreciate it. I could care less if its taboo here, game advice these days is stale anyway. Why not mix it up a little. Dealing with all aspects of game is even more unique for the older player, its not discussed anywhere.

Except no more lame ass breakup videos. That we can agree on.

Post: #1730

(01-17-2017 11:52 AM)Vaun Wrote:  I need advice from the Older Guys.

I outlined in this thread how my ltr plate was treating me. It was unanimous, I had to dump her. When it came time to happen a few days after I made that thread, she dumped me. I wrote about it a little, but held back writing about it too much here.

tl;dr - help, Im still thinking about my ex 5 months later.

I met this girl doing my usual approaching. we fell in love fast. She wanted to dump me after continuing to spin other plates, after 4 months in. I begged her to stay. The relationship eroded from there(she got REALLY bitchy). I made a few other mistakes like forgetting my passport was expired(by two months) before we went on a trip, and accidentally losing her wallet when she stashed it in my bag on another trip. She was distant, bitchy, narcissistic, etc. Earlier in the relationship it looked like we were headed for marriage, she proclaimed her love for me, way before I mentioned it, etc. She was over her head with me for three months, it was like the early LTR's I had as a young man, blissful, exciting. Then it went totally downhill after all of this stuff happened, etc. I became the worst beta version of myself I have ever been, ever, to try and save it. It ended after almost a year.

So... I am still thinking about her after 5 months of no contact that I initiated. We broke up, I asked her to come back, she did, and I couldn't hold back and told her my intentions were to marry her. I think this freaked her out and she left for good. I blocked her from every social media platform, and moved on, total no contact for 5 months and blocked social, I totally dropped out of her life. I have been with several girls since and I am seeing someone, for the last 5 months. Its been a good experience, my new girl is nice. No drama, just sweet times. But I didnt fall for her, like my last.

Still thinking about this last girl. 5 months on. I thought I should unblock her at least. She hasnt reached out to me. I thought I might in the future. At this age, early 40's, she was the only other woman I considered marrying, other than my ex wife. Things like approaching, etc, dont really even interest me anymore, even though I regularly have women in my life. The last six months have lead me to a much deeper level of self discovery. I have read and reconnected with friends and family, traveled, and now I know myself. I am a much more well rounded person now. I am 90% sure now I want to remarry and have more children. When I met her I was 100% apposed to remarriage, etc.

Have any of you older guys been through something similar? My plan is to stay no contact indefinitely unless she contacts me.

You want this girl back, even though the relationship was short.

You wanted marriage early in the relationship.

How long were you with her?

I still think about girls from a decade ago, I let sleeping dogs lie.

I find what you wrote tough to read, I see a lot of flags in what you had written.

Sometimes we have to look in the mirror and be truthful with ourselves.

Get back on the horse.

Post: #1731

(01-18-2017 03:44 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  I still think about girls from a decade ago, I let sleeping dogs lie.

The best ever cure for this is to actually see those women in person years later.

Nine times out of ten they will have let themselves go, physically. Even if they didn't pork out or neglect their hair and clothes, Father Time will hand you a set of reality glasses that should eliminate whatever reminiscing is still going on inside your head. I'm not suggesting that you should plan this, but if it ever happens unexpectedly, chances are you'll feel a thousand times better about what you didn't commit to years earlier.

Post: #1732

^ I said I think about them and that's all.

I think about them in the same way I think about high school, good times but I would never want to be back there again.

Post: #1733

@Vaun
Sit down and ask yourself what do you love about this woman? You can ask a guy "why do you love (fill in the blank)", and they can go on forever. You ask them why they love a woman and they either give you a blank stare, or some horse shit. But it's never as passionate as their favorite thing.

Post: #1734

(01-21-2017 08:52 PM)vinman Wrote:  @Vaun
Sit down and ask yourself what do you love about this woman? You can ask a guy "why do you love (fill in the blank)", and they can go on forever. You ask them why they love a woman and they either give you a blank stare, or some horse shit. But it's never as passionate as their favorite thing.

I realize now I might have blown up this thread, and I have to apologize, that wasn't my intention. Since making my original posts, I have found other threads like the No Contact thread, where these posts would have been more appropriate.

After blowing out this thread, and the responses, its less and less important since I made these posts. She represented making more babies, it was base level stuff. Plus I went raw with her for almost a year, and blew inside of her 100s of times. That may have stirred up more Oxytocin. I'm moving past it now.

Aside from the girl, I have had serious work drama, which intensified this whole experience. Basically it was my entire 2016.

I have two plates now, late 20's, over 10 years younger, who I can't give enough sex. One is coming over now. One was over last night. Girls sending nude pics, girls texting me out of the blue again(Dantes knows...). I have nothing to complain about.

I was looking through my pics of girls from 2013-15, when I was gaming supreme, and it was such a fun time. I had so many hot girls(10-20 yrs younger) I dated and banged, many of which I am still friends with that still hit me up out of the blue. That was a wild ride, and I want to get back to that. But be smarter about it, with more intent, and keep the good ones around longer.

One story, I saw this amazing local college hottie on Tinder, she had her IG, so I followed her there. Probably the cutest latina with the most insane body you will ever see, in a 5'3 110lb body. I hit her up on IG, and a year later.. got with her. Even though my approaching, day/night game was really strong, I saw that as my pinnacle. I literally said I am going to get with this girl, and got it, a year later.

Now I just want to get my body back, and lower my body fat and get lean. I started exercising again. Once work settles in, I get my fitness/body back, I am going back into game.

Post: #1735

(01-15-2017 10:35 PM)Kaizen Wrote:  As for as gaming younger women is concerned, the most important determinant is your LOCATION. Hard truth, but that is reality.

I'm here in asia. A 21 year old is in my apartment. Is that happening back in the anglosphere...hell no.

Was out last night with another forum guy who is late 30s. We approached two 19 year olds, hung out and got their #s. They didn't even ask our age.

Feminized women are sensitive to even the smallest age gaps. Elsewhere, not so much.

Location is only partially true...I think if was Courage Reborn who said back in a epic older post about how much economic prosperity and Westernisation plays a larger part in the different look out over age in the different regions.

For instance most people I know I have better luck in the age disparity in Ukraine over Poland due to these same reasons.

If your in Asia now ... I'm willing to bet age was less a issue in Vietnam then South Korea which similar to the Ukraine / Poland analogy.

Post: #1736

So, based on some discussion on the physique thread.. /thread-13091-page-11.html

I am wondering about this..

If you are 30+ mid 30s like me, and have a lean build/ frame (with little bit of love handles/ mid section to burn) and are a Hard Gainer..
.. And switch betweeen.. V neck T with Jeans to Vneck/ Fitted Shirt + Jeans/ Slacks with a Linen Suit Jacket..
..
.. How does your physique pop out of a suit, if you are not Jacked/ Swole?

PS: From face/ skin/ genetics and yoga.. I can look 29/30.. (few silver hair popped in 2016 due to stress)..

PPS:
I do not wish pump risky artificial chemicals into the body (all natural medicine and food) and its an age where it would be harder for a Hard Gainer to jack up/ get swole.. ?

Thoughts?

Post: #1737

The question is, do you really need people to know you work out when wearing a suit / jacket? Why not just let it be something you have underneath?

Post: #1738

If you work out properly, people will be able to tell.

Even when wearing a suit, a guy that works out will wear the suit differently.

There are shortcuts you can do, like building up your traps and shoulders.

Personally, I think the number one concern should be your stomach. The core should be tight, this is what makes or breaks a good physique.

Plenty of guys are big, how many have a nice stomach with visible abs.

This is my focus, I have a four pack. The bottom ab doesn't want to make an appearance.

Diet is key, even more important when you are over 40.

Post: #1739

(01-23-2017 04:47 AM)xmlenigma Wrote:  .. How does your physique pop out of a suit, if you are not Jacked/ Swole?

Thoughts?

Very good question. I have one well fitted suit that I can wear when I'm more jacked and shirts that are very fitted. Right now I'm about 15lbs above what I need to be for that suit/shirt combo. So, I think girls can see it in your face when you are cut and if your suits and shirts are well fitted they can see and you show a lot of value.

However, if I switch to a V-neck fitted T-shirt then yeah, that is what shows it off.

G

Post: #1740

(01-23-2017 11:02 AM)rudebwoy Wrote:  If you work out properly, people will be able to tell.

Even when wearing a suit, a guy that works out will wear the suit differently.

There are shortcuts you can do, like building up your traps and shoulders.

Personally, I think the number one concern should be your stomach. The core should be tight, this is what makes or breaks a good physique.

Plenty of guys are big, how many have a nice stomach with visible abs.

This is my focus, I have a four pack. The bottom ab doesn't want to make an appearance.

Diet is key, even more important when you are over 40.

My Bottom ab went away due to a shit diet at 31. With severe diet and relentless workout it returned from 32-39, and I was forced to take a year off so it left again. I went hard in the gym from 40 till now but it will not return. Considering fat burners, strict water only liquids, no drinking alchohol, and two a days until it comes back.

Post: #1741

[/quote]
My Bottom ab went away due to a shit diet at 31. With severe diet and relentless workout it returned from 32-39, and I was forced to take a year off so it left again. I went hard in the gym from 40 till now but it will not return. Considering fat burners, strict water only liquids, no drinking alchohol, and two a days until it comes back.
[/quote]


It all comes down to caloric restriction and losing weight. If # on scale isn't moving down, belly will remain the same.

Food scale and counting calories may be needed. Depends how badly you want it. Quite an effort.

Post: #1742

You don't have to be swole to look good in a suit. I'm not a big guy, but when I used to swim, it showed in my broad shoulders and chest with a narrow waist. Swimming is probably the best exercise for looking good in a suit, giving you that v shaped body. Too bad my current gym doesn't have a pool.

Post: #1743

(01-23-2017 01:52 PM)Atlanta Man Wrote:  

(01-23-2017 11:02 AM)rudebwoy Wrote:  If you work out properly, people will be able to tell.

Even when wearing a suit, a guy that works out will wear the suit differently.

This is my focus, I have a four pack. The bottom ab doesn't want to make an appearance.

Diet is key, even more important when you are over 40.

My Bottom ab went away due to a shit diet at 31. With severe diet and relentless workout it returned from 32-39,

Agreed diet becomes absolutely central. I loved long intense workouts, but as I got to my late 50s you just can't do them. You'll get so exhausted you'll get sick, depressed, get in a car accident, alienate people as your mood declines....

So basal calorie burning goes down ( I assume) and ability to up activity to burn extra calories goes down too.

I remember hearing Lance Armstrong had trouble getting to the super low body fat needed even when now we know he was taking drugs.

They wrote that he was weighing every single thing he ate.

Post: #1744

(01-23-2017 10:48 PM)dallasguy Wrote:  You don't have to be swole to look good in a suit. I'm not a big guy, but when I used to swim, it showed in my broad shoulders and chest with a narrow waist. Swimming is probably the best exercise for looking good in a suit, giving you that v shaped body. Too bad my current gym doesn't have a pool.

Not an objective. But when I was on physique thread, that's that experience I was sharing.. that unless one is Larger, it wont become obvious..

Let me rephrase this.. For a mature guy who works out (bodyweight/ calisthencis etc) is lean and is not Swole.. and wears fitted custom shirts & suits.. a lot of that will not become OBVIOUS under a suit.. Though, I think a full sleeve & fitted knitted V neck could replace a shirt at times..

To add another related question:

I dont see the sense in getting to a shape that cant be SUSTAINED/ MAINTAINED as part of normal lifestyle.. So 5% BF may be unrealistic to MAINTAIN..

I eat clean most of the times.. allow myself 1 or 2 meals out in a 1/2 weeks, where Pizza/ Pasta may sneak in.. Mostly even when out I prefer a Thai Veg curry etc.

What BF do you think / you are able to manage and maintain for long term.. what do you recommend? Thoughts?

Post: #1745

A guy that works out can be spotted a mile away.

For starters, most guys that work out cannot buy suits of the rack. The usual 40 jacket and 34 pant will not work for most serious gym guys.

A guy that works out will generally have better posture, I use to slouch badly before I started training.

Not sure why this is such a big debate.

Do you feel comfortable at a beach in your swim trunks?

Would you feel comfortable taking your top off at a Vegas pool party or at Ibiza?

It all boils down to feeling comfortable in your own skin.

I want to stay in the game as long as possible, so I will do everything I can within my power to do so. That includes working out properly, eating right and keeping my core tight.

I have to get a camera up my willy next month, so that is enough motivation for me to stay healthy.

Post: #1746

I dont see the sense in getting to a shape that cant be SUSTAINED/ MAINTAINED as part of normal lifestyle.. So 5% BF may be unrealistic to MAINTAIN..

I agree. In Miami at Equniox Brickell working out is a lifestyle for most members that I see regularly and we all agree that "walking around" of around 10-12 percent body fat is damn impressive for a normal person. For me to get "fighting weight" of less than/equal to ten percent and maintain it takes serious lifestyle modification- watching calories, 2 hours of gym 6 times a week minimum, a lot of Stairmaster time, plates with 1/4 meat 3/4 veggies, eating 6 times a day, and a lot of water drinking. I can maintain "fighting weight" for 3 months, but it takes 4 months to get there-Bernard Hopkins has done it for almost 20 years, so it is possible.....

Post: #1747

(01-24-2017 02:49 PM)Atlanta Man Wrote:  I dont see the sense in getting to a shape that cant be SUSTAINED/ MAINTAINED as part of normal lifestyle.. So 5% BF may be unrealistic to MAINTAIN..

I agree. In Miami at Equniox Brickell working out is a lifestyle for most members that I see regularly and we all agree that "walking around" of around 10-12 percent body fat is damn impressive for a normal person. For me to get "fighting weight" of less than/equal to ten percent and maintain it takes serious lifestyle modification- watching calories, 2 hours of gym 6 times a week minimum, a lot of Stairmaster time, plates with 1/4 meat 3/4 veggies, eating 6 times a day, and a lot of water drinking. I can maintain "fighting weight" for 3 months, but it takes 4 months to get there-Bernard Hopkins has done it for almost 20 years, so it is possible.....

Thanks for that bit of insight.. I think I'll try to get to and stick with that 10-12% and maintain..

I do not have an issue eating clean.. But, if NO ONE's body stays at those LOW BFs naturally then no point pushing it.. (unless some other motivation).

Although I did see/ read about some natural / Veg folks who say they are able to maintain.. It's something I'll have to see once I get to those numbers..

PS: I mostly do body weight training as "serious gym" time used bring in a lot of dependencies and due to my travel life, I chose to become free from the "i dont feel like going to the gym today" excuse.

Get out of bed, no change of clothes, start moving.. no matter how lazy.. or tired.. Get "some" exercise in.. be it a workout, or light yoga..

Post: #1748

You can maintain 8-9% without problems, strength and muscle gains will be harder though. Below that and it starts to affect sex drive etc in my experience.

Post: #1749

quote
I do not have an issue eating clean.. But, if NO ONE's body stays at those LOW BFs naturally then no point pushing it.. (unless some other motivation).



I am going to be honest here, I am fucking vain and narsassistic. When I was in Atlanta I was in the top 99 percentile in terms of my body compared to the top teir "people on the scene"-When women saw me they would stop and stare, comment on my height and body, and outright tell me how attractive I was. Then I moved to Miami, the most body concious place I have ever been(and I have been to LA and Brazil)-Everybody here looks amazing, I am nothing special. Everyone has low body fat, everyone is in shape, everyone has visible abs in their late 30's early 40's. When you go to the pool parties in Miami <12 body fat is the norm - That is my motivation to go so hard in the gym and maintian my weight, also I like making chicks tap out in the bedroom.

One more thing I will admit is I fucking love pull ups. When my body fat is low I can crank out more pullups at a higher rate. Pull ups,heavy chest bench press, deep squats, and deadlifts really bring the man in me out. Weighted pull ups and weighted tricept dips bring out the BEAST MAN in me.

Post: #1750

(01-25-2017 11:51 AM)Atlanta Man Wrote:  quote
I do not have an issue eating clean.. But, if NO ONE's body stays at those LOW BFs naturally then no point pushing it.. (unless some other motivation).



I am going to be honest here, I am fucking vain and narsassistic. When I was in Atlanta I was in the top 99 percentile in terms of my body compared to the top teir "people on the scene"-When women saw me they would stop and stare, comment on my height and body, and outright tell me how attractive I was. Then I moved to Miami, the most body concious place I have ever been(and I have been to LA and Brazil)-Everybody here looks amazing, I am nothing special. Everyone has low body fat, everyone is in shape, everyone has visible abs in their late 30's early 40's. When you go to the pool parties in Miami <12 body fat is the norm - That is my motivation to go so hard in the gym and maintian my weight, also I like making chicks tap out in the bedroom.

One more thing I will admit is I fucking love pull ups. When my body fat is low I can crank out more pullups at a higher rate. Pull ups,heavy chest bench press, deep squats, and deadlifts really bring the man in me out. Weighted pull ups and weighted tricept dips bring out the BEAST MAN in me.

THIS IS WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT!

Miami is an intimidating place to say the least, it is like swimming in the deep end of the ocean.

I also love pull-ups and the pissed of look of younger guys in the gym, when I crank out 100.