Post: #9451

(02-16-2017 08:39 PM)CJ_W Wrote:  

(02-15-2017 08:01 PM)ksbms Wrote:  [quote='ksbms' pid='1510602' dateline='1487163774']
Met with a J-girl studying in Scotland from this

Thanks for the message, I rarely look at this lounge thread.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure your logistics were fucked. You didn't even need to kiss her, much less multiple times, you needed to bring her to your place, If you didn't think she was warm enough you should have taken her to a coffee shop or a fun place for like 15-20 minutes, THEN to the bar, THEN to your house, THEN start kissing. Kino is good but yeah, J-girls may kiss you in public but it adds to the slut alarm thing.

I think that's where you fked up. You can try inviting her to your place and cooking food and having wine or something next time, if she responds back. I wouldn't expect it though, besides you should have multiple women waiting in the wings so that you wont be obsessing over one girl, so what if she's Japanese? Her pussy aint better than anyone else's that is just as attractive as she is.

This bring me to another point. A few guys here may disagree but, I've started to soft next quickly a LOT, I dont really have time to deal with LMR nowadays, so if there are signs that a chick is going to make me have to go through the motions to fuck her, I usually end it before getting to that point, and maybe use her as a point of contact for other women or other things I do, as in activities where I'll invite multiple women to hang out with me, nothing sexual, but to increase my smv. That's a different subject/potential data sheet altogether though.

Basically, the controversial point is this: when she said she "had a boyfriend," that's usually when I know she's going to have some LMR, sure you can fuck her, but USUALLY it's a pain in the ass to do this, and I don't feel like dealing with that. . .I used to not give a shit when I was younger but, back then I didn't really know what I wanted to do. Basically after getting your logistics on lock, feel her out to see if she's going to be a problem when you go back to your place. If she mentions a boyfriend, or keeps asking "where are we going" while you go to your venues, she's most likely going to give LMR, and I usually cut the date short and put her on the back burner.

Thanks for bringing more light to my question, CJ_W.

It appears to me there are significant cultural differences the way Japanese girls perceive the courtship ritual. Didn't realise public display of affection is a big no-no, e.g., kissing (though the date was in the UK so it makes things a tad different) and that, e.g., a girl will go home with you quite easily prior any physical escalation anyway. I found the Sex with Japanese Girls post by Sinapse illuminating into J-girls' mindset - too bad haven't had a chance to read before the date. As he explains:

Failure to escalate things to sex, and you’ll end up on the outside looking in, and many girls won’t even meet you again. [...] If you do not escalate the interaction, the girl is very often not going to see you again, especially if you have met her through cold approach. [...] If a girl is out on a date with you in Japan, most of the time, sex is on the table. And much of the time, if you don’t provide it, she won’t see you again anyway.

Now it looks to be exactly the case, since 48h passed since my messaging her about meeting up again, and guess what, no reply.

Live and learn.

Post: #9452

I've come up with a quick and easy way of shutting girls down when they ask you to do something for them.

Just say "No, thanks."

Can you come here and pick me up instead?

"No, thanks."

Can you buy me that dress?

"No, thanks."

Girls normally laugh at the fact I'm saying thanks, while they are annoyed I'm not going to do what they say. However it's a subtle way of making them realise I get NOTHING out of what they are asking me to do, while they get something. It normally takes something like that to get through to their narcissistic minds. They normally then shutup.

Post: #9453

Thanks for all this Jgirls talk, it will be useful to me in the future. I think this might be one of the reasons I failed to kiss-close her, since I went for it on the street. Anyhow, I invited her over to cook something, she declined and didn't counter-offer so I now it's time to search some other japanese girl on my town's beautiful streets.
The 19 year old's mutual friend is not here this week, but I already made plans for next week. We'll see if they don't flake though.
The girl that ended my dry-spell is, very very probably, going to become a plate, since sex has been very good (thanks NoFap!), and she asks a lot of questions and makes plans to see me again. All good.

So I had 3 options, one I converted into a bang, one fell, and the other one is on stand-by. Not bad. Now it's time to go out and get some more leads!

Post: #9454

(02-18-2017 03:47 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  Getting a first date bang with amazing sexual chemistry will probably never get old.

The thrill of new talent- it's my addiction. Not only the bang itself/ the mystery of her nude body- but her quirks/mannerisms in bed, if she's any good/an active participant, and any weird shit she might be into.

Post: #9455

(02-19-2017 06:53 PM)Player_1337 Wrote:  

(02-18-2017 03:47 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  Getting a first date bang with amazing sexual chemistry will probably never get old.

The thrill of new talent- it's my addiction. Not only the bang itself/ the mystery of her nude body- but her quirks/mannerisms in bed, if she's any good/an active participant, and any weird shit she might be into.

I can't wait to get to your levels. Where I get enough lays that I can actually start worrying about bed life.

Post: #9456

Around junior year of college I noticed a trend. Hot girls were moving away from the university bubble and were actively interested in dating older men. Not any old guys, but young professionals. 24-32 year olds out of college with careers, “YoPros."

Not only did they open up their tinder age range, these girls would go out for the sole purpose to meet older guys. They would dress nice, do their hair, slap on the heels, and go to happy hours high value men went to. What was the appeal? Glad you asked

-After two years of college they had run through and broken up with most of the alpha college guys. It'd be slutty to hook up with a guy who knew her sexual history second hand.
-These same guys were either locked up or continued to chase impressionable freshmen
-Likewise, older girls did not want to date younger guys. Once girls turn 21, they’d much rather drink bubbly with an older man than sneak Natty Light into the dorms with a freshman.
-Girls got bored of the same shitty college bars. You can only take an IG picture in the same bar so many times before it loses appeal.
-Dating older provided STATUS. For a while being in college was a status symbol, but it wore off. They realized they're in a bigger tank..there's nothing exclusive about going to a tailgate
-New excitement. Older guys know cool bars, events, restuarants, parties, etc that a young chick would never even hear of.
-The benefits of "daddy game." Any problem she's going through? Guys have seen the movie and the sequel.
-No negatives of daddy game. Still young enough to party, keep up with pop culture, meet her girlfriends, befriend their boyfriends.

I saw all of this happening and I was jealous. It seemed so easy for these guys. They were so honed into their career, money, lifestyle, everything that picking up college chicks was easy. They showed up in a nice shirt and said “hey what’s up?” and the panties started falling off.

This weekend it clicked that I’m finally that guy. I’ve always chased college girls…but now that I’m 25, I’m old enough for there to be an actual age gap. I have enough life experience and money to set the frame from more of a daddy angle.

The funny thing is now that I’m here, there’s still barriers to success. I was out with this gorgeous little 19 year old Saturday, and my friends tried to shame me for being with such a young girl. I laughed it off and owned up to it, but it’s just another example of how social conditioning is always standing in our way. They don’t want us to be successful. They don’t want us to date college girls. They don’t want us to have social freedom to do whatever the fuck we want. So what do we do? Whatever the fuck we want!

Post: #9457

(02-19-2017 06:53 PM)Player_1337 Wrote:  

(02-18-2017 03:47 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  Getting a first date bang with amazing sexual chemistry will probably never get old.

The thrill of new talent- it's my addiction. Not only the bang itself/ the mystery of her nude body- but her quirks/mannerisms in bed, if she's any good/an active participant, and any weird shit she might be into.

Yeah I've been with more of the guilty conscious types lately, from a religious background, and they couldn't let themselves go. Afraid or unwilling to explore. Afraid to be seen nude without sheets over them. Not as comfortable.

This one had all the slavic mannerisms I enjoy, with the skills, willingness, and enthusiasm that is very rare amongst the American girls.

I love the feeling of a girl forcibly deepthroating herself on me. And then giving me massages/rubs in my refractory period. Especially when it's her idea without needing any instruction.

Yet I then will go back and remember the girls that were very inexperienced and were shaking in nervousness on the first bang (also a first date bang...) and had to be lead through everything.

They're just all so different in their own delightful ways.

Post: #9458

I got too defensive tonight. I came into the place ready and willing to talk to people. I ended up drinking and talking to no one. Danced a little, but got like little to no connections. A lot of girls were with someone else, and I didn't get easy ways to approach. I can't tell whether I was just being too afraid or just didn't want to bother anyone. It was a place that usually gets a lot of people on Sundays, so it was technically a saturday club. And I screwed up. I talked to no girls.

Post: #9459

(02-19-2017 08:46 PM)redbeard Wrote:  I’ve always chased college girls…but now that I’m 25, I’m old enough for there to be an actual age gap...

Woah... you are only 25! The vibe from the postings of yours that I have seen portrays a much more mature vibe. I thought you were early-30's.

You have another 5 years until you hit 30 and even then, if you take care of yourself, you may be able to pull off the under-30 look for several years after that.

Why is this great?

In addition to being a great time for enjoying your health and freedom, a Western man's late 20's generally represents the best combination of (a) high desire and (b) peak opportunity to pickup and bang young premium babes aged 20-25 in my experience. (This excludes some men in their 30's who have built considerably more riches and status, and/or who are selected for long-term investment.)

So, Redbeard, I see a great future ahead of you.

Further reading:

- John Michael Kane - RE: "Fucking around" til mid/late 30s
- What’s The Average Age Difference In A Couple?

Post: #9460

Not a player and I feel like I don't deserve to post in here. Posted this in the approach thread to keep basically a journal going but would like to get some responses from you experts. It's really long:

So I ended up on a date with one of the approaches I did last weekend - the irish chick. This will be an honest reflection of the night's events. She had an 8 face, 6 body. The date went well and I am very good and conversing, making chicks laugh, mixing with some more "serious" topics but not too serious and good with kino. I can read when to escalate slowly. I may have made some missteps at the end though. Not 100% sure though.

Texts kind of went like this:

Me: gave her some nickname, then asked her how adventurous she is

She said she's very adventurous.

Me: I told her that we should do something fun and go on an adventure.

She didn't reply until basically a day later. Said she's terrible at texting people back and she was hung over (). Asked me to do Thurs. I said she seemed like trouble but I'm intrigued because of the accent. Thurs didn't work and she offered another day on the weekend.

- I did not text her throughout the week.

Takeaway

- if a girl wants to see you, even though replies may be slow for whatever reason, she WILL offer you days. Must remember this for next time.

The date

I wasn't enthusiastic about this at all. I've mentioned before that even though I'm on a stupid long dry spell and am bursting at the seams, I do want something more long-term with a solid girl. A girl who travels a lot, gets super hung over, works in the restaurant business is not congruent with my life goals. I was hoping she'd cancel but I sent out a feeler text in the afternoon saying to push it back 15 min because I had something else to attend. She replied. Date was on.

I saw her and she looked and smelled really damn good. Although she wasn't dressed very sexy probably because of the weather, she had the prettiest eyes on a girl I've been on a date with.

I'm not going to go over every single detail but only the general points and some highlights.

First location:

Beer place. Had a beer. Convo was flowing but wasn't anything great. There weren't any pauses or awkward silences. I'd say the convo at this point was more a getting to know each other stage that was superficial and maybe a bit boring. I always sit side by side at bar and her legs were angled towards mine slightly touching them. I made sure to learn in my legs just a tad but not too much. Turns out she gets approached in this city by pick up guys at least 2x a month. I had to play it off and pretend I didn't know it existed. She said she gives them fake numbers but gave me a real one because I made her laugh. I'm guessing it probably helps that I'm dressed well.

Second location

Cocktails. She sat even more towards me but I sat back relaxed. Had my arm on her chair but this time added some low back touching, leg touching. Convo was better. She qualified herself to me. I asked her what type of guys she goes for and then she asked me if what kind of girls I go for and described herself. Good that she's qualifying herself. She was also surprised by my age. And qualified herself saying that age doesn't matter to her because it depends on the connection and asked me if I care about her being so much younger (LOL).

Locations 3 and 4

Live music was location 3. Vibing well. More kino. I told her that we're going to be adventurous and took her hand to the dance floor for a slow song.

When we went to location 4 for the last cockails, I held her hand while walking there.

Final Location and possible missteps

So after the final location, I took her to an area that overlooks the water. Throughout the night, I felt that she was into me because of her body language and how she described me to her friends over text (check in texts saying it's going great and that I'm nice). I was going over in my head whether or not I should push the envelope. Based on my crappy logistics, how she was warm towards me, I didn't feel like I needed to go over board and wasn't going to suggest a hotel... however, I ended up doing something that was the worst of both worlds:

When we walked to the water, I pulled her in and we started making out pretty heavily. I ended up pulling away each time first but she seemed kind of nervous after it but I don't think it was a bad nervous. I asked her how adventurous she was and I think this may have made her take a step back because that obviously implied fucking. I stopped the making out for a bit and we just sat on the benches over looking the water and holding hands. Then SHE started kissing me and we went at it pretty hard. We stopped (or maybe she stopped for a bit).

Then we started walking and she said she should start walking home. I said cool. She said if I was thinking about going home with her tonight, it's not happening. I don't think I handled this great but I laughed and said "going home with me? Not sure what your'e talking about. I live in the burbs!"

We then stood over this bridge type area overlooking the streets and started talking a bit. I may have over-done it a bit and joked around saying how innocent I am (I teased her all night on her being "trouble"). This is where I may be over thinking things but she said something super weird: "ya whatever happens, we'll at least be friends." LOL wtf? I didn't respond to this. When I said that was the first time I've ever done that before (kissing like that), she said "no way, you're too handsome to have never kissed a girl"

I asked her what impression she has of me and she said I'm a guy that knows what he wants. She asked me the same about herself. I said some sort of lame platitude "I can tell that you're at a point where you have a few different life paths and you're not sure which one to go towards." She said "OMG! How'd you know this!!!"

She walked me half way to the train station and said her street was up this way and it's a few blocks up. I offered to drop her off and she said it was okay. I said I may text her again because I had fun and she said she may text me back. We kissed. I told her to text me when she got home safely.

Here's where I may have messed up AGAIN although it's difficult to say. She never texted me back within 20 min so I texted her asking if she's safe. She replied immediately and said "Ya I'm in bed now! are you on the train? "

I replied and said "Yes. I had fun and there's something about you so I'm going to text you again. Going to take a chance here."

No response.

Main Takeaways

- Even though I've been in a slump and my confidence with chicks can fluctuate, I've built my life and my self up enough that I'm comfortable with who I am and the value I bring. My convo skills are really damn good and I have enough experience to know how to escalate.
- Keep it fun but interject some more "serious" stuff like family, and career goals. But always bring it back to fun.
- Kino when she is ready
- Teasing. I teased her and kept it light. I typically will also say something along the lines of "you look innocent but THAT look right there says you may be trouble"
- Laser eye contact. Shows confidence.
- The make outs. This is where I need to figure out what the hell I'm doing. My read was that I wasn't going to get a lay last night. I should have played it this way. In the past, I've blown it by making out too desperately. I was especially desperate last night for affection because I haven't had any action in a long time. Based on my read, I probably should have made out just a little and kept her wanting more. The way I did it, it might have been a bit desperate.

Difficult to say though. I've had intense constant making out where sex and relationships happen. But I think overall, even in those situations where it worked out, less is more. Leave them wanting more.

It's definitely a fine balance though. I'm not going to try to do the lame "nice guy" approach and pretend that I don't want sex. But, depending on the girl, you can't be so overt about it. It's a balance that depends on the girl and requires experience to know how far to push it.

- I worry about giving too much of a "player" vibe especially when I was joking about doing that for the first time. If anything, it might stem from insecurity hoping to elicit a response of "omg you're so good at kissing and you're so smooth!" I'll need to watch this going forward. But I was a little shook when she said she's not going home with me and the innocent stuff was kind of a way to backtrack. I think I over-did it.

- Not sure where I go from here when she didn't reply. I clearly can't double text. I dont think my text last night at the end was a terrible play. I can rationalize it as more "comfort building" after she called me out on the sex thing. But who knows what these chicks are thinking. Since she said she's not going home with me, maybe it was on HER mind. It's always a case by case situation. Only get better reads with more reference experience.

- If this doesn't turn out, I know I will feel a little "down" because of the "rejection" but I know this has no future. She travels a ton, is in the service industry and has a ton of beta orbiters. One of her best friends is a guy. I've been there and done that. Never again. I will never have anything serious with a girl that has close guy friends. Makes it worse with the lifestyle she lives. She's a nice girl but based on her lifestyle, it's not conducive to what I want to build. Let's say she does text me back and we go on another date, do I really want to be with someone who lives such a "free" lifestyle and then get stuck in something for a year and waste my time?

Post: #9461

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  Not a player and I feel like I don't deserve to post in here. Posted this in the approach thread to keep basically a journal going but would like to get some responses from you experts. It's really long:

So I ended up on a date with one of the approaches I did last weekend - the irish chick. This will be an honest reflection of the night's events. She had an 8 face, 6 body. The date went well and I am very good and conversing, making chicks laugh, mixing with some more "serious" topics but not too serious and good with kino. I can read when to escalate slowly. I may have made some missteps at the end though. Not 100% sure though.

Texts kind of went like this:

Me: gave her some nickname, then asked her how adventurous she is

She said she's very adventurous.

Me: I told her that we should do something fun and go on an adventure.

She didn't reply until basically a day later. Said she's terrible at texting people back and she was hung over (). Asked me to do Thurs. I said she seemed like trouble but I'm intrigued because of the accent. Thurs didn't work and she offered another day on the weekend.

- I did not text her throughout the week.

Takeaway

- if a girl wants to see you, even though replies may be slow for whatever reason, she WILL offer you days. Must remember this for next time.

The date

I wasn't enthusiastic about this at all. I've mentioned before that even though I'm on a stupid long dry spell and am bursting at the seams, I do want something more long-term with a solid girl. A girl who travels a lot, gets super hung over, works in the restaurant business is not congruent with my life goals. I was hoping she'd cancel

Come one, don't sell us bullshit.

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  but I sent out a feeler text in the afternoon saying to push it back 15 min because I had something else to attend. She replied. Date was on.

I saw her and she looked and smelled really damn good. Although she wasn't dressed very sexy probably because of the weather, she had the prettiest eyes on a girl I've been on a date with.

How did you greet her? Was she wearing trousers of dress/skirt?

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  I'm not going to go over every single detail but only the general points and some highlights.

First location:

Beer place. Had a beer. Convo was flowing but wasn't anything great. There weren't any pauses or awkward silences. I'd say the convo at this point was more a getting to know each other stage that was superficial and maybe a bit boring. I always sit side by side at bar and her legs were angled towards mine slightly touching them. I made sure to learn in my legs just a tad but not too much. Turns out she gets approached in this city by pick up guys at least 2x a month. I had to play it off and pretend I didn't know it existed.

Bad move. No need to lie - if you do cold approach girls, own it. No need to go into details and have a conversation about but true player is unapologetic about what he does be it a girl likes it or not. You probably became afraid of her reaction - weak frame.

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  She said she gives them fake numbers but gave me a real one because I made her laugh. I'm guessing it probably helps that I'm dressed well.

Second location

Cocktails. She sat even more towards me but I sat back relaxed. Had my arm on her chair but this time added some low back touching, leg touching. Convo was better. She qualified herself to me. I asked her what type of guys she goes for and then she asked me if what kind of girls I go for and described herself. Good that she's qualifying herself. She was also surprised by my age. And qualified herself saying that age doesn't matter to her because it depends on the connection and asked me if I care about her being so much younger (LOL).

It was a time to go for a kiss, thus overtly confirm mutual attraction. Best way is probe with gradual escalation. If you weren't certain if the kiss was on the table, you could've start touching her hands (many pretexts can be found for that - my girls are usually on the slim side so usually have pretty hands. I just say 'let me have a look at your hands, and take their hands. That's all), and if they'd stay soft and floppy in yours, move on to touching her hair or even grabbing it behind and pulling. It's a power move and sexual but displays lots of confidence. Had she accepted all of it without demurring, kiss was ON.

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  Locations 3 and 4

Live music was location 3. Vibing well. More kino. I told her that we're going to be adventurous and took her hand to the dance floor for a slow song.

When we went to location 4 for the last cocktails, I held her hand while walking there.
[\quote]

Why fourth location?! you should've kissed her at the third location at the latest and suggest to go to yours under any pretext. She wasn't objecting with a boyfriend, fiancee, husband, weren't giving you time constraints, such as "I need to be home by X because of ABC". Sex was quite possibly on the table at that stage.[\b]

[quote='BetaNoMore' pid='1513921' dateline='1487616573']

Final Location and possible missteps

So after the final location, I took her to an area that overlooks the water. Throughout the night, I felt that she was into me because of her body language and how she described me to her friends over text (check in texts saying it's going great and that I'm nice). I was going over in my head whether or not I should push the envelope. Based on my crappy logistics, how she was warm towards me, I didn't feel like I needed to go over board and wasn't going to suggest a hotel... however, I ended up doing something that was the worst of both worlds:

When we walked to the water, I pulled her in and we started making out pretty heavily. I ended up pulling away each time first but she seemed kind of nervous after it but I don't think it was a bad nervous. I asked her how adventurous she was and I think this may have made her take a step back because that obviously implied fucking. I stopped the making out for a bit and we just sat on the benches over looking the water and holding hands. Then SHE started kissing me and we went at it pretty hard. We stopped (or maybe she stopped for a bit).

Then we started walking and she said she should start walking home. I said cool. She said if I was thinking about going home with her tonight, it's not happening. I don't think I handled this great but I laughed and said "going home with me? Not sure what your'e talking about. I live in the burbs!"

[\quote]
[b]
Lead, lead, lead. Don't seem hesitant, don't ask questions, command her. You could've found a bench (probably) or somewhere to sit, and try to fuck here right there or at least make her suck your dick. Entitlement, conviction and not giving a fuck would in the worst case scenario get you, if not sex, at least more than kissing, hand holding and blue balls.[\b]

[quote='BetaNoMore' pid='1513921' dateline='1487616573']

We then stood over this bridge type area overlooking the streets and started talking a bit. I may have over-done it a bit and joked around saying how innocent I am (I teased her all night on her being "trouble"). This is where I may be over thinking things but she said something super weird: "ya whatever happens, we'll at least be friends." LOL wtf? I didn't respond to this.

It's good you ignored but it's no good she had thoughts like this and verbalised it. Not sure why she said that but I would bet £5 it had something to do with you being way too nice. Nice guys finish last?

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  When I said that was the first time I've ever done that before (kissing like that), she said "no way, you're too handsome to have never kissed a girl"

I asked her what impression she has of me and she said I'm a guy that knows what he wants. She asked me the same about herself. I said some sort of lame platitude "I can tell that you're at a point where you have a few different life paths and you're not sure which one to go towards." She said "OMG! How'd you know this!!!"

She walked me half way to the train station and said her street was up this way and it's a few blocks up. I offered to drop her off and she said it was okay. I said I may text her again because I had fun and she said she may text me back. We kissed. I told her to text me when she got home safely.

Here's where I may have messed up AGAIN although it's difficult to say. She never texted me back within 20 min so I texted her asking if she's safe. She replied immediately and said "Ya I'm in bed now! are you on the train? "

I replied and said "Yes. I had fun and there's something about you so I'm going to text you again. Going to take a chance here."

No response.

Live and learn.

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  [b]Main Takeaways

- Even though I've been in a slump and my confidence with chicks can fluctuate, I've built my life and my self up enough that I'm comfortable with who I am and the value I bring. My convo skills are really damn good and I have enough experience to know how to escalate.
- Keep it fun but interject some more "serious" stuff like family, and career goals. But always bring it back to fun.
- Kino when she is ready
- Teasing. I teased her and kept it light. I typically will also say something along the lines of "you look innocent but THAT look right there says you may be trouble"
- Laser eye contact. Shows confidence.
- The make outs. This is where I need to figure out what the hell I'm doing. My read was that I wasn't going to get a lay last night. I should have played it this way. In the past, I've blown it by making out too desperately. I was especially desperate last night for affection because I haven't had any action in a long time. Based on my read, I probably should have made out just a little and kept her wanting more. The way I did it, it might have been a bit desperate.

Difficult to say though. I've had intense constant making out where sex and relationships happen. But I think overall, even in those situations where it worked out, less is more. Leave them wanting more.

It's definitely a fine balance though. I'm not going to try to do the lame "nice guy" approach and pretend that I don't want sex. But, depending on the girl, you can't be so overt about it. It's a balance that depends on the girl and requires experience to know how far to push it.

- I worry about giving too much of a "player" vibe especially when I was joking about doing that for the first time. If anything, it might stem from insecurity hoping to elicit a response of "omg you're so good at kissing and you're so smooth!" I'll need to watch this going forward. But I was a little shook when she said she's not going home with me and the innocent stuff was kind of a way to backtrack. I think I over-did it.

- Not sure where I go from here when she didn't reply. I clearly can't double text. I dont think my text last night at the end was a terrible play. I can rationalize it as more "comfort building" after she called me out on the sex thing. But who knows what these chicks are thinking. Since she said she's not going home with me, maybe it was on HER mind. It's always a case by case situation. Only get better reads with more reference experience.

- If this doesn't turn out, I know I will feel a little "down" because of the "rejection" but I know this has no future. She travels a ton, is in the service industry and has a ton of beta orbiters. One of her best friends is a guy. I've been there and done that. Never again. I will never have anything serious with a girl that has close guy friends. Makes it worse with the lifestyle she lives. She's a nice girl but based on her lifestyle, it's not conducive to what I want to build. Let's say she does text me back and we go on another date, do I really want to be with someone who lives such a "free" lifestyle and then get stuck in something for a year and waste my time?

Don't beat yourself about it. You've done what most men will never do - met a random girl, got her on a date, and kissed. That's a great referential experience. Next time will be better, faster, and further than kissing. Keep up the good job, man!

Post: #9462

Used the red heels restart text on a few girls today. It works pretty damn well I must say. All of them instantly replied "Who's this". I said "wrong person, similar name. It's Eugenics but don't worry about it lol". Didn't bang any old flings but got some quality entertainment out of it watching their hamsters spin and spin.

Post: #9463

(02-20-2017 11:58 AM)Dream Medicine Wrote:  

(02-19-2017 08:46 PM)redbeard Wrote:  I’ve always chased college girls…but now that I’m 25, I’m old enough for there to be an actual age gap...

Woah... you are only 25! The vibe from the postings of yours that I have seen portrays a much more mature vibe. I thought you were early-30's.

You have another 5 years until you hit 30 and even then, if you take care of yourself, you may be able to pull off the under-30 look for several years after that.

Why is this great?

In addition to being a great time for enjoying your health and freedom, a Western man's late 20's generally represents the best combination of (a) high desire and (b) peak opportunity to pickup and bang young premium babes aged 20-25 in my experience. (This excludes some men in their 30's who have built considerably more riches and status, and/or who are selected for long-term investment.)

So, Redbeard, I see a great future ahead of you.

Further reading:

- John Michael Kane - RE: "Fucking around" til mid/late 30s
- What’s The Average Age Difference In A Couple?

Thanks for the kind words, Dream Medicine.

With good framing techniques, you can always feel like you're in your peak, even though next year you'll climb to new heights.

Freshman year of college? I thought I was at my peak because I could go out 3-4 times a week and meet tons of little chicks. I didn't bang many, but was thankful for the experience.

Junior/senior year of college? I had a supportive girlfriend, strong friend circle, and bright future. This must've been my peak right? After this it was just career and soul sucking 9-5.

Right out of college? It was so easy to blend in with college chicks and pound fireball, but I had money and freedom to do whatever the fuck I wanted. This might've been my peak.

Now? Could be my peak, for reasons discussed above. Spoiler alert it's not, I'm just cracking into online business and know the next few years will be exciting.

In five years? I'll think I'm in my peak for different reasons. There's always room to expand and grow. Do you think DJT laments his 30's because he was able to bang a ton of models? No! Because we're always pushing and building. As men, that's what we do. There will be downfalls but we should always be climbing.

Post: #9464

(02-20-2017 05:44 PM)Eugenics Wrote:  Used the red heels restart text on a few girls today. It works pretty damn well I must say. All of them instantly replied "Who's this". I said "wrong person, similar name. It's Eugenics but don't worry about it lol". Didn't bang any old flings but got some quality entertainment out of it watching their hamsters spin and spin.

I know this girl, fwb'd with her for about a month. Did some pretty disgusting things to do her and her shit testy attitude was like heroin to me for some reason. For some reason I tried to lock her down. Single mom with mixed kid, yikes, I thank a god i don't even believe in every day that i am too broke/not good looking enough for her to want to agree to locking me down, or worse, try to steal my DNA.

She says she has a man now, girl doesn't know how to keep one. Even if he's beta-beta-prime he still wouldn't stick around for this bitches shit. Anyone with a hint of adonis blood wouldn't do more than plate this girl.

I have a feeling about 1 week after she breaks up with her dude (any fuckin day now) she'll be hittin up yours truely. I won't try to do more than plate her this time. I left her on seen with the last text and plan to indefinitely; until she hits me up.

This is my first try with agressive restart texts like red heels though, i've been wrong before.

Post: #9465

Finally alive after a bender of a weekend.

Friday night I kept things very mellow, Saturday was my friends dirty 30, got super drunk super fast.

My friend decided he wanted to hit a beach city and bailed on a party to pick up some blow.

That turned into an absolute bender that lasted until 9AM Sunday. My buddies had some deep conversations, I kind of stayed quiet, thinking about alot of things.

My buddy drove us home, I ended up puking my brains out when I got home, super bad heart burn from all the Vodka Redbulls.

Slept on and off all day Sunday, worked a bit, decided to go home, I was feeling like shit, I missed out on our company dinner, I helped achieving some big goals for our quarter, just didn't have it in me.

Slept on and off yesterday also, I just felt outright bummed, had some weird fucking dreams also.


I really need to lay off the benders, I've been doing well not drinking much booze.

I think subconsciously I'm a bit hung up on being ghosted by biker girl and not knowing why. I know closure isn't for dudes.

Still hitting up girls to game and meet up with, after last weeks mediocre dates, I was a bit discouraged.


It's been over 10 days since I've banged, to me it feels like a fucking forever. I don't watch porn or fap, strictly sex with women.

I know I have it in me to go out and fuck, but something just isn't right with me, somethings bothering me.


(I also think it has to do with me drinking that much booze on saturday, followed by the blow comedown, usually you get depressed and restless on the comedown)


The new workout program Steelex gave me is working out great so far, logging my workouts has been so helpful as well to see progress.


Stalin suggested I take a break, but I definitely feel like I need a slump buster.

This weekend definitely sucked the life out of me.

Post: #9466

(02-20-2017 01:49 PM)BetaNoMore Wrote:  Not a player and I feel like I don't deserve to post in here. Posted this in the approach thread to keep basically a journal going but would like to get some responses from you experts. It's really long:

So I ended up on a date with one of the approaches I did last weekend - the irish chick. This will be an honest reflection of the night's events. She had an 8 face, 6 body. The date went well and I am very good and conversing, making chicks laugh, mixing with some more "serious" topics but not too serious and good with kino. I can read when to escalate slowly. I may have made some missteps at the end though. Not 100% sure though.

Texts kind of went like this:

Me: gave her some nickname, then asked her how adventurous she is

She said she's very adventurous.

Me: I told her that we should do something fun and go on an adventure.

She didn't reply until basically a day later. Said she's terrible at texting people back and she was hung over (). Asked me to do Thurs. I said she seemed like trouble but I'm intrigued because of the accent. Thurs didn't work and she offered another day on the weekend.

- I did not text her throughout the week.

Takeaway

- if a girl wants to see you, even though replies may be slow for whatever reason, she WILL offer you days. Must remember this for next time.

The date

I wasn't enthusiastic about this at all. I've mentioned before that even though I'm on a stupid long dry spell and am bursting at the seams, I do want something more long-term with a solid girl. A girl who travels a lot, gets super hung over, works in the restaurant business is not congruent with my life goals. I was hoping she'd cancel but I sent out a feeler text in the afternoon saying to push it back 15 min because I had something else to attend. She replied. Date was on.

I saw her and she looked and smelled really damn good. Although she wasn't dressed very sexy probably because of the weather, she had the prettiest eyes on a girl I've been on a date with.

I'm not going to go over every single detail but only the general points and some highlights.

First location:

Beer place. Had a beer. Convo was flowing but wasn't anything great. There weren't any pauses or awkward silences. I'd say the convo at this point was more a getting to know each other stage that was superficial and maybe a bit boring. I always sit side by side at bar and her legs were angled towards mine slightly touching them. I made sure to learn in my legs just a tad but not too much. Turns out she gets approached in this city by pick up guys at least 2x a month. I had to play it off and pretend I didn't know it existed. She said she gives them fake numbers but gave me a real one because I made her laugh. I'm guessing it probably helps that I'm dressed well.

Second location

Cocktails. She sat even more towards me but I sat back relaxed. Had my arm on her chair but this time added some low back touching, leg touching. Convo was better. She qualified herself to me. I asked her what type of guys she goes for and then she asked me if what kind of girls I go for and described herself. Good that she's qualifying herself. She was also surprised by my age. And qualified herself saying that age doesn't matter to her because it depends on the connection and asked me if I care about her being so much younger (LOL).

Locations 3 and 4

Live music was location 3. Vibing well. More kino. I told her that we're going to be adventurous and took her hand to the dance floor for a slow song.

When we went to location 4 for the last cockails, I held her hand while walking there.

Final Location and possible missteps

So after the final location, I took her to an area that overlooks the water. Throughout the night, I felt that she was into me because of her body language and how she described me to her friends over text (check in texts saying it's going great and that I'm nice). I was going over in my head whether or not I should push the envelope. Based on my crappy logistics, how she was warm towards me, I didn't feel like I needed to go over board and wasn't going to suggest a hotel... however, I ended up doing something that was the worst of both worlds:

When we walked to the water, I pulled her in and we started making out pretty heavily. I ended up pulling away each time first but she seemed kind of nervous after it but I don't think it was a bad nervous. I asked her how adventurous she was and I think this may have made her take a step back because that obviously implied fucking. I stopped the making out for a bit and we just sat on the benches over looking the water and holding hands. Then SHE started kissing me and we went at it pretty hard. We stopped (or maybe she stopped for a bit).

Then we started walking and she said she should start walking home. I said cool. She said if I was thinking about going home with her tonight, it's not happening. I don't think I handled this great but I laughed and said "going home with me? Not sure what your'e talking about. I live in the burbs!"

We then stood over this bridge type area overlooking the streets and started talking a bit. I may have over-done it a bit and joked around saying how innocent I am (I teased her all night on her being "trouble"). This is where I may be over thinking things but she said something super weird: "ya whatever happens, we'll at least be friends." LOL wtf? I didn't respond to this. When I said that was the first time I've ever done that before (kissing like that), she said "no way, you're too handsome to have never kissed a girl"

I asked her what impression she has of me and she said I'm a guy that knows what he wants. She asked me the same about herself. I said some sort of lame platitude "I can tell that you're at a point where you have a few different life paths and you're not sure which one to go towards." She said "OMG! How'd you know this!!!"

She walked me half way to the train station and said her street was up this way and it's a few blocks up. I offered to drop her off and she said it was okay. I said I may text her again because I had fun and she said she may text me back. We kissed. I told her to text me when she got home safely.

Here's where I may have messed up AGAIN although it's difficult to say. She never texted me back within 20 min so I texted her asking if she's safe. She replied immediately and said "Ya I'm in bed now! are you on the train? "

I replied and said "Yes. I had fun and there's something about you so I'm going to text you again. Going to take a chance here."

No response.

Main Takeaways

- Even though I've been in a slump and my confidence with chicks can fluctuate, I've built my life and my self up enough that I'm comfortable with who I am and the value I bring. My convo skills are really damn good and I have enough experience to know how to escalate.
- Keep it fun but interject some more "serious" stuff like family, and career goals. But always bring it back to fun.
- Kino when she is ready
- Teasing. I teased her and kept it light. I typically will also say something along the lines of "you look innocent but THAT look right there says you may be trouble"
- Laser eye contact. Shows confidence.
- The make outs. This is where I need to figure out what the hell I'm doing. My read was that I wasn't going to get a lay last night. I should have played it this way. In the past, I've blown it by making out too desperately. I was especially desperate last night for affection because I haven't had any action in a long time. Based on my read, I probably should have made out just a little and kept her wanting more. The way I did it, it might have been a bit desperate.

Difficult to say though. I've had intense constant making out where sex and relationships happen. But I think overall, even in those situations where it worked out, less is more. Leave them wanting more.

It's definitely a fine balance though. I'm not going to try to do the lame "nice guy" approach and pretend that I don't want sex. But, depending on the girl, you can't be so overt about it. It's a balance that depends on the girl and requires experience to know how far to push it.

- I worry about giving too much of a "player" vibe especially when I was joking about doing that for the first time. If anything, it might stem from insecurity hoping to elicit a response of "omg you're so good at kissing and you're so smooth!" I'll need to watch this going forward. But I was a little shook when she said she's not going home with me and the innocent stuff was kind of a way to backtrack. I think I over-did it.

- Not sure where I go from here when she didn't reply. I clearly can't double text. I dont think my text last night at the end was a terrible play. I can rationalize it as more "comfort building" after she called me out on the sex thing. But who knows what these chicks are thinking. Since she said she's not going home with me, maybe it was on HER mind. It's always a case by case situation. Only get better reads with more reference experience.

- If this doesn't turn out, I know I will feel a little "down" because of the "rejection" but I know this has no future. She travels a ton, is in the service industry and has a ton of beta orbiters. One of her best friends is a guy. I've been there and done that. Never again. I will never have anything serious with a girl that has close guy friends. Makes it worse with the lifestyle she lives. She's a nice girl but based on her lifestyle, it's not conducive to what I want to build. Let's say she does text me back and we go on another date, do I really want to be with someone who lives such a "free" lifestyle and then get stuck in something for a year and waste my time?

Don't get hung up on the "minutiae" From what I can see overall you did fine. (Here's a little tip though: Sometimes a girl says "Dont think about taking me home tonight" is a shit test that means she's thinking about it.)

From a macro view I have a couple of suggestions:

-Shitty logistics. You said it yourself but this is huge. Fix that and everything will get a lot easier

-Oneitis. Not in the classic sense of being hung up on a particular girl but rather looking for "the one" or even "something more serious". Don't "decide on" LTRs in advance (you can't anyway) but rather let one develop organically if it does. This is for several reasons not the least of which is that the "I'm looking for a GF" mentality out of the gate is going to reek of neediness to most girls

Good job on the cold approach. Play on

Post: #9467

(02-21-2017 04:54 AM)Eugenics Wrote:  I have a feeling about 1 week after she breaks up with her dude (any fuckin day now) she'll be hittin up yours truely. I won't try to do more than plate her this time. I left her on seen with the last text and plan to indefinitely; until she hits me up.

This girl hit me up today. She totally got to me though. got her all horny talking about what we used to do and how her new man wasn't fucking her right and dropped a little beta bait on her. She actually called me and got me to drop the game for just 5 minutes and she fucked right off. One day i'll be that good.

I was also trying so fucking hard to get this girl i banged last night over with her half gallon of Jameson, fucked that up somhow. I'll review my actions tonight and try to improve.Ah it might still happen!

Not game but also flunked a job interview. I'm just going to charge it to the game I guess.

Post: #9468

(02-21-2017 02:49 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  Don't get hung up on the "minutiae" From what I can see overall you did fine. (Here's a little tip though: Sometimes a girl says "Dont think about taking me home tonight" is a shit test that means she's thinking about it.)

From a macro view I have a couple of suggestions:

-Shitty logistics. You said it yourself but this is huge. Fix that and everything will get a lot easier

-Oneitis. Not in the classic sense of being hung up on a particular girl but rather looking for "the one" or even "something more serious". Don't "decide on" LTRs in advance (you can't anyway) but rather let one develop organically if it does. This is for several reasons not the least of which is that the "I'm looking for a GF" mentality out of the gate is going to reek of neediness to most girls

Good job on the cold approach. Play on

Thanks for the reply.

Logistics I need to fix. It may have been a different story if I could have tried to transitioned back to my place if I had one but unfortunately, that won't be in the cards for at least another year.

I also need to somehow change my mindset to not "look" for LTRs as you mentioned so I don't come off as desperate. As I mentioned in a previous thread, I've been in the longest rut since my early 20s. On most days, the thirst and deprivation of sex/affection is getting to me mentally and physically. The aforementioned date was the first time I even kissed a girl in 8 months. Fortunately, I can honestly say I didn't give off any desperate vibes on the date which is why it went so smoothly... that is until the make out stuff. It wasn't like I was grabbing onto her for dear life (she initiated the 2nd one) but I let it go on longer than it should and that likely killed some suspense and gave off some desperate vibes.

I would have been fine to go for a hotel (she has roommates) but my initial assessment was that she wouldn't have been up for that suggestion and as such, I shouldn't have gone so crazy with the making out.

It's useless speculating but I do wonder what the heck happened when she didn't reply to my last message. I'll probably shoot her a message tomorrow trying to set something up for the end of the week because I need to break this cold streak but I'm thinking she won't reply.

I'm definitely not in the best spot. The dry spell is likely giving off desperation vibes which makes the dry spell last longer. I'm also hitting 33 this year and even though I look better than ever, have grown as a person and my career is squared away, I'm getting less interest than in my late 20s. I'm also feeling like time is "running out" because I fear that all the women worth keeping around are already tied up and I'm left with a pool of undesirables.

Post: #9469

I uninstalled Bumble and Tinder last night and deactivated my OKC account. They are just becoming too much of a distraction and at this point I'm not as focused on trying to meet new woman.

I have a main girl that takes up the majority of the time I would spend with other women, and I have side chicks here and there (that admittedly are fading away). Between the 3 apps I find myself with my face in my phone too often during the day-to-day and I don't like it, and if you aren't on there often swiping and messaging girls then the leads you get go cold so it defeats the purpose of even using them.

Things are going girl with my main girl and I am feeling a little player guilt when with other women anyway. It's also starting to become a hassle getting free nights to see other women between seeing my girl and other social and personal activities I'm into.

It's okay to hang the hat up once in a while. The women will always be there even when you are not.

Post: #9470

I changed my venue and found a real nice place in downtown Dallas. The bars here were a lot more friendly to me and I got a lot more game than I previously got at more uptight places. The girls here flow like wine and they know exactly why they are there. It helps that I got a good look going, and have girls often say I'm different from the other guys. They think I'm some kind of celebrity or musician, which melds well with the downtown music scene. I just play up the angle and have been getting some success. No lays yet, but got some numbers. I'm not playing too offensive of a game yet, which I'm sure cost me a few laid moments, but I'm reading the atmosphere before I start going ham for night stands.

Post: #9471

Rough week fellas. I have probably 6 potential chicks who I'd get a chance at 2-3 of them...got no responses yesterday (my best lead I didn't text).

I think it's a mid-week thing. I have to remind myself how fickle chicks are as well. I was down about it for like 2 hours yesterday, then had a great night at BJJ, then went and did squats followed by a good steam room.

Any rejection feeling I had briefly yesterday has manifested as motivation today. I don't mean just chicks (although I will approach/escalate more), but even in just my personal life.

Just goes to show how much gym / lifting / combat sports are to the psyche.

Post: #9472

(02-23-2017 09:55 AM)heavy Wrote:  Just goes to show how much gym / lifting / combat sports are to the psyche.

Absolutely. Going to the gym and lifting is so therapeutic. In fact, that is probably the main reason on why I go...because of the mental clarity I get from a good workout session.

I try to tell my buddies who don't lift that yeah, building a nice body is great but it's the overall feeling of being....well, a man...that is the most addictive part of lifting weights. It's literally a drug.

Post: #9473

(02-22-2017 10:30 AM)General Stalin Wrote:  I uninstalled Bumble and Tinder last night and deactivated my OKC account. They are just becoming too much of a distraction and at this point I'm not as focused on trying to meet new woman.

I have a main girl that takes up the majority of the time I would spend with other women, and I have side chicks here and there (that admittedly are fading away). Between the 3 apps I find myself with my face in my phone too often during the day-to-day and I don't like it, and if you aren't on there often swiping and messaging girls then the leads you get go cold so it defeats the purpose of even using them.

That's the same reason I uninstalled those apps. At a certain point any downtime I got I would spend swiping and /or messaging back and forth with chicks and lots of those conversations would go nowhere and I'd get sick of it. Also had a main at the time which sated my need for pussy, so I know where you're coming from.

I'm in the opposite position now, lol. I'm gonna start up Bumble / Tinder / maybe OKC (more and more trannies and fatties on there every time I make a profile) and give it a go. Bumble worked best for me before.

In other news, last night was the first time I went out in awhile. I didn't pull but had a few decent interactions. Finally getting over the saltiness of losing my main and it's time to get back on that whorse. Just gotta force yourself out there no matter what the results may be....and eventually things fall into place. It's interesting how that works.

Post: #9474

It's amazing how one day things will look so dark abnd he next Jameson girl comes over and an old fwb wants to start fucking again. The power of keeping it moving is so fucking strong. If someone doesn't do what you want go next and come back to it later. Rooshv forum has taken me out of the game stone age. Still have alot to learn

And tinder date friday with a thick 7, assuming no flake or course. I'm gonna build comfort today over text.

Tinder convo went like this
[Multiple choice open]

??? a nice date or intelligent conversation is at the top of the list lol

Yikes, it's kind of a package deal
Tinder girls usually go for D) all of the above

I'm sure???

What [girls name], you're not like all the other girls?

I can honestly say no, that I'm not lol

Hmm. Alright. Let me figure that out for myself. Cofee tomorrow?

I can't tomorrow but I'm free on friday!

Let's do it. Leave your number and we'll line it up

Alright [number]


I wish these girls could know how cliche they sound. It's so bad that even if I just effortlessly spoute cliches at them they do it right back completely unconsciously.

When I get my money right and get into the right head space I really want to start day gaming more. I get way better results than online andactually enjoy it so much more

Post: #9475

@Eugenics

Don't worry about getting your funds right necessarily, doesn't cost anything to talk to people

For warm-ups start being social with more people throughout the day, so when you do get the urge to approach your target you come across as natural