(09-03-2016 11:04 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  I'm curious where the "lifestyle" factors into the attraction, or rather how much it factors in. Men don't give a shit what a girl does. Some hot IG hoe taking pics of her at some pristine beach in dubai, out partying at some hot locale, or rubbing shoulders with celebs means absolutely nothing to men. If anything it's a bit of a turn off, but the point is that as long as she is good looking then we could give a fuck what kind of status she has, who she knows, or what she does. Women on the other hand salivate for men who look good and also have lavish/interesting lives.

We already know men are more visual than women in regards to attraction. We care a lot more about her physical assets. Women care more about the package. What a man represents. How he makes her feel. Men don't love interesting women, but women love interesting men.

^ Attractive women are drawn towards access to resources and being in the presence of a man who can provide those resources. (or at least one who has the appearance to)

Generally speaking, attractive women are seekers and extractors of resources.

Whether the resources be social status, money, exotic trips, access to an exciting lifestyle, connections with the high end crowd (read social status), they are attracted to men who can provide such things.

They're even attracted to the 'resource' of being able to beef up their social media pages with pictures of them and their teddy bear boyfriend while on Christmas vacation in Aspen.

Men also care about these things to some extent, but not in the sense that it relates to the value we place on the women we want in our lives.

"This makes sense once you realize attractive women are drawn towards access to resources and being in the presence of a man who can provide those resources. (or at least one who has the appearance to)

Attractive women are seekers and extractors of resources.

Whether the resources be social status, money, exotic trips, access to an exciting lifestyle, connections with the high end crowd (read social status), they are attracted to men who can provide such things. "

Although there is certainly biological wiring at play with this, culture plays a huge role too. American women tend to be much more concerned with status than most Western European women for example. This is one reason that I actually prefer Western European women to most other women.

So the Latina from earlier in the week that put up so much resistance texted me the other night and said "I think I was a disaster on our date and you don't want a second one." When I asked her what she meant she said she was nervous, said things she shouldn't have, and that dating is very different in Mexico than here. Yesterday I had a party, it wrapped up and I was chilling at a neighbors in the evening, that started wrapping up and the Latina texted me asking if I could get away for a couple minutes because she had something for me. I met her a little bit later at my house and she immediately wrapped her arms around me and kissed me. We made out for a few minutes, I was touching and rubbing on her, she was still saying she wasn't going to sleep with me and that she had to go home for her kids. I asked who was watching them, turns out the bitch still lives with her ex-husband even though they've been divorced for a year, they do some kind of shared parenting thing. At this point I'm beyond annoyed so I tell her I'm not interested in a situation like that but we can have some fun. She says she doesn't just have fun, says goodbye and leaves. Deep sigh of relief, and proud of myself for not allowing bullshit drama situations in my life.

So I randomly told the biker girl to roll to a bar I was at - she wanted to see this band I randomly saw at a dive bar. Showed in 20 mins, watched a few songs.

Then pinned it wide open on the Harley home while she tried following, we both realize getting fast food, was a bad idea.

Went back home smashed and went to bed.

That's 3 times in 7 days, fuck man, that's a little weird, but she's fucking chill, gotta kick back and fuck other pussy.


The trainer girl showed up last night, had a few drinks, she asked about my ex, saying if I cheated on her. (creeped my IG, didn't ask about the 2 boob luges)

I told her that we tried being friends for awhile and it didn't work, satisfactory answer, I fucked her in the restaurant bathroom.

That's 5 girls I've fucked in that girls bathroom - gets the girls so wet.

Ate our food, fucked when we got home, and fucked before she left to go home.

Pulled a girl from a bar for the first time in nearly 3 years.

Some chick from out of town on a bachelorette party.. was their third night.. all the others were tired, she and her friend stayed out, we blocked a couple dudes trying to make moves and swooped them.

Was pretty nice... still feels weird but at the time felt good and natural. Did not have a single feeling or desire to ever see her again.. phone number, didn't care. Forgot her name for a while. Way more cold & calculating than I used to be.

Do any of you ever lose friends over bitches?

For example this chick started talking to me that one of my friends was feeling and all of a sudden he doesn't want to hang out anymore. He's all ass mad because broad chose up. Another example is I was dating this chick and after we broke up one of my best friends Tried to put some moves and gave her his number.

What kind of gay ass shit is that about? I quickly cut these fools out of my life but damn some even go way back to 5+ years.

Guy around the corner of this bar is on a first or second date with a tatted up peroxide blond. I hear "How do I follow you?", tune in and next thing she's showing him how to set up his instagram- first shared photo is one of them together. This will only end badly. Maybe tonight, maybe next month, maybe in 5 years.

(09-05-2016 05:41 AM)xxMarco Wrote:  Do any of you ever lose friends over bitches?

For example this chick started talking to me that one of my friends was feeling and all of a sudden he doesn't want to hang out anymore. He's all ass mad because broad chose up. Another example is I was dating this chick and after we broke up one of my best friends Tried to put some moves and gave her his number.

What kind of gay ass shit is that about? I quickly cut these fools out of my life but damn some even go way back to 5+ years.

Dude, that's a hard lesson I had to learn.

Some guys will not be able to deal with it. They pin their hopes and dreams on one girl - so by you getting the girl, it's seen (emotionally, instinctually) to be you actually damaging his hopes and dreams, and stabbing him in the back. It's seen in very much the same light as making an active choice to either let a friends business fail, or to actually encourage it to fail, for example.

It's hard to manage, and the best thing to do is cut them out. Hard as it can be when you've known them for so long. You eventually meet those guys who know that ego is less important than someone you can trust. Who know that hopes and dreams pinned on some chick is the worst decision you could ever make in your life.

A guy I met 4 years ago when I started changing my life, just last night stepped aside to let me pull the prettier girl (she was showing interest in him - once he stepped aside, I got her interest rolling), since I'd gotten out of a relationship in a bad manner. Those moves are the ones you appreciate, because it means the bond between two guys is deeper than who gets the girl or not. I haven't met many guys who are willing to do that. I can count them on one hand. But you will meet them, just the same.

I mean, really, at least ask if you can make a move on the ex. Still a bit off to do that, though, friends should respect that. I lost a lot of friends back in the day, and didn't have more than two good friends, for quite a while. As time went on I started actually meeting some guys who were more relaxed.. who, even if not people who will read or study things like this, are still aware and not going through their lives asleep.

Well nexted the girl from beach city - she came over night 1 - didn't bang. Night 2 didn't bang because we were meeting halfway.

She drove over 45 minutes to come over tonight, pushed through alot of LMR - kept saying no sex but didn't stop me. When in doubt whip it out, she started cranking it and I started rubbing her pussy.

She told me she wants it to mean something more than just sex, I played it cool, eventually just laughed it off by saying "You know what I'm just gonna wait till marriage"


No dice twice after- ended up kicking her out after the movie.

Not worth my time or the effort - plus she wants a relationship obviously and I'm not about to do that or even try with her.

Charge it to the game.

Met up with a Bumble match on Monday night, probably one of the most attractive women I've met up with. She's 6' tall (same as me), long legs, long dark hair, nurse, mid-30's. We were going back and forth about getting a drink in the evening, told her I would enjoy doing something active with her rather than sitting across a table and proposed taking a walk in the park near my house with Solo cups of wine for a walk by the river. She was enthusiastic about that, I figured another sunset walk and work on what I learned from taking the Latina out the week before.

Girl is running late and won't be at my place until dark, she keeps texting me questions "Should I get wine" and "What about solo cups", I reply "Too many questions get your ass over here". A couple minutes before she arrives she texts "Please don't be a serial killer " and I reply "At least I'm a cute one". We have some mutual friends in common so that was mostly a joke, when we talked about it later I flipped it to joking about her being the serial killer and we had a good laugh.

She arrives and she's tall, I'm cognizant of posture the entire night to stay eye to eye with her. I invite her in and chat for a couple of minutes, give her a tour of the house including a brief stop in my bedroom to show off the back yard, then fill up the solo cups with wine and head out on the walk. It's fully dark out with little moon but we can see well enough, we're chatting and sipping the wine. We get to a section of the trail where the trees come in heavy and it goes nearly pitch black, she jumps and grabs onto my arm. I know this area very well so lead the way with her hanging onto me, we go a bit further and it opens up to a bridge over the river with the moon shining through the trees. Hang out there for a bit, she's loving the scenery, I comment about how awesome it is being able to wake up to nature like this every day and ask her if she's had experience like that (Thanks WIA!). Walk a bit further and we're standing in clearing with the stars and moon shining, lots of small touches on her arm and back and shoulder, she holds onto my arm when we walk.

Back at my place we're finishing the wine and I've got chill music going. I don't know why but girls always end up leaning on my kitchen counter, it's kind of like a granite bar between the kitchen and dining/living area. The table is right there so it's almost like they are backed into a corner a bit. I don't want to be on the other side of the counter but I don't want them to feel trapped so I usually steer them to the couch or move in and away occasionally to give space. We are standing very close together, heavy eye contact and sexual tension, she has her foot on the wall behind her with her leg up and I'm tracing my fingers along her thigh while smiling at her. I've already decided I'm not going for the bang tonight, we got a late start and we both have work early in the morning and she has kids at home. As we finish the wine she steps forward to give me a hug goodbye and I turn it into a kiss, nice brief passionate makeout session, love hearing her soft moan, then pull back and send her on her way. Got a "Thanks for the great first date" text when she got home.

I feel pretty good about this, I was confident and comfortable the entire time even with a very tall and very attractive woman. There was excitement and tension and activity on the walk, then relaxing yet continued sexual tension back at my place. No guarantee it won't fizzle out, but I plan to invite her out again and go for the bang next time.

*gets a little misty eyed*

Maybe put something over in the counter area to create natural reason for you to be in her space, but not trapped.

Like how bar designers create traffic areas that encourage bumping so that guys get inadvertent connections with girls giving opportunities to buy drinks. See also dance floor and salty snacks on using the environment to create emotions.

WIA

It's a natural gravitation spot especially if I'm cooking and they are pouring wine and chatting with me, plus it's a convenient place to drop their purse and keys when they walk in. I often have my tablet there for controlling the music in the house. I don't think any girls have been uncomfortable there, I'm probably more aware of it than they are. I'll put more thought into it, it's an interesting dynamic of my home.

Another one bites the dust. You just know you're in when she does the "You're so talllll teehee "

I also only to seem to hit it off as of late with the kind of chicks that were sheltered and a bit socially awkward from years from living in the burbs. Think I need to work on my banter again. Being too approachable once I start talking might be a bit of a bad thing.

I was lined up to have a marathon fuck session last night with one of my girls. She was offering anal and all. After one round I couldn't keep it hard consistently for the rest of the night. Even the next morning.

What the fuck man. Gay.

EDIT: I guess it's worth noting I had sex earlier in the day with one of my other girls... and jerked off later on after that.

@ GS definitely a case of overuse. When I make the mistake of lining up multiple sex partners in a day I usually either keep a tiny cialis in my wallet.

On another note: My spanish has been improving(shouts to Vinny language thread) and one of my old chicas in Mexico hits me up. We finally are able to have a phone convo. Tells me essentially she has the perfect life with her boyfriend and she just graduated from university but is bored inside and wants us to be "amantes secretos." I'll take her up on that offer.

-CD

(09-05-2016 05:41 AM)xxMarco Wrote:  Do any of you ever lose friends over bitches?

For example this chick started talking to me that one of my friends was feeling and all of a sudden he doesn't want to hang out anymore. He's all ass mad because broad chose up. Another example is I was dating this chick and after we broke up one of my best friends Tried to put some moves and gave her his number.

What kind of gay ass shit is that about? I quickly cut these fools out of my life but damn some even go way back to 5+ years.

Yes, I've lost friends that were less opportunistic.

One case comes to mind where my friend invited me to a party.
Some girl he hollered at invited him.
The party is coming to a close and I tell him I'm going to bail.
He asks me to walk the girl home, the one that invited him. I come to the conclusion he wants me to bang, so I do.
The next day he asks if I banged and I said yes.
He was pissed, but I couldn't feel bad for dunking the layup he set for me

Damn that's a first on Date 1 - didn't see that coming.


Matched with this cute almost 7 white chick on Bumble.

She's a sports trainer - super sarcastic and shit talking.

I should've seen this as a red flag, we'd drop sexual lines here and there.

Finally talked on the phone twice, she was pretty funny and kept trying to keep up on my shit talking.

Anyways we meet up at my regular bar halfway from my pad.

She's cute for sure but definitely had mannerisms that were a bit manly.

She couldn't keep eye contact and she definitely had ADD.

She sits a bit far away than usual than any girls I've been on dates with.

We had some laughs, talked shit, talked ourselves up - the connection wasn't really there (could be bias after what happened) but we were having fun.

Since she's an athletic trainer she's ALL about sports - especially local pro teams.

She's also apart of a fantasy league with her "guy friends" who are all pro's in baseball - huge red flag.

She also lives with a roommate who she subtly hinted hits on her.

She was listing players she drafted and all sorts of shit.

We get another round.

We shot some pool - she's pretty aggressive almost angry looking playing pool.

Beat her at Game 1.

At one point she and I argue about what ball sunk in first and if I was stripes or solids - she literally cussed at me all angry.

Red fucking flag.

She was on her phone also, texting someone, another red flag.

That kind of pissed me off and I hesitated on bailing right then and there - I just stayed quiet as I destroyed her on Game 2.

20/20 - My gut told me something was wack about her and I should leave - I didn't listen.


We sit down for a bit and chat, once again sitting at a distance - I tell her we're bouncing.

She goes to the bathroom.

I close our tab - my mistake looking back at it - especially since she offered money as we walked out - I played it cool and said the bartender hooked me up.

We walk to the pond - sit on a bench and chat a little. Again sitting at a distance.

Talk about basic bitches - shit outside of work.

Then she says, "You know I gotta be honest, I'm getting a friend vibe."

I laugh and say, "What made you think that"

She says, "Just talking here on that bench"

I've never had a girl drop that on me during an actual date (since I started gaming).

Honestly, yeah that was a bit of a blow to my ego.

I laugh again say, "That's cool"

"Well I know it won't bug you"

"You know I don't care, I'm not tripping"

With a smirk, "Could've told me this earlier and saved me the trouble"

She laughs and says sorry.

We say a few more sentences, then this couple across the way were doing weird shit and we leave.

We say our goodbyes and I "hug close"

Walking away - it felt like my initial days getting rejected by a girl - a little stunned - a bit of a sting.

Started replaying the 2 hours we hungout - figuring out what went down:

Was I not enough of a sports jock?
Wast I not aggressive enough on the bench ?
Was she mad about losing, since she's super competitive?
Was it something I said that was nerdy ?

You start thinking of what happened, theories, strategies, what not to say ever again to a girl on a date.

In the end all you can say is fuck it, she was honest, and saved you time and money.

Sometimes life gives you a reality check when you're cocky and have had pretty good success in the dating scene.

Deleted her number and unmatched her.

Charge it to the game.

Kaotic, this reminds me of the old saying 'I'm a lover not a fighter'.

I think that distinction still exists to some extent.

The men i'v known who were the best with women, the lovers, had a certain softness about them, more in touch with their feminine side than the fighters of the world.

Could it be that spending so much time chasing and fucking the amount of women you do has softened your masculine edge?

Similar to how spending so much time with a woman in a marriage softens a man.

Sounds like she's a high T girl with a hard edge of her own.

She was testing you hard with the sarcasm, arguing, texting someone, cussing at you and you said yourself you don't bail (or call her out) you STAY QUIET and 'destroy her' on the pool table and then pay for the tab before going to sit on a park bench.

I'm not digging at you here but it sounds to me like she may have slightly intimidated you and you fell into her frame.

She no doubt picked up on that hence the friend zone.

These girls are probably not worth the trouble as you need a cast iron frame to deal with their merciless testing for weakness.

Aggro girls need even more aggro guys to keep them in line.

Maybe I'm way off but but if you have softened and want to rebalance, do more 'man' stuff, MMA, football whatever.

Iv had to do it myself before.

Iron sharpens iron.

Good points by MR. Your description reminds me a lot of a chick I was seeing semi-regularly for a few months several years ago, heavy into sports, former military (she was 27 I think), lot of guy friends. I think it would be a good idea to not even talk about sports, or anything else "masculine" which she might have more knowledge of than you. Perhaps I'm biased but I don't see sports specific knowledge (teams rosters, records etc) as demonstrating value, loss of value if anything. I know I told this chick straight up that I hate organized sports. If they ever bring up wanting to see some team play "My friends had tickets to see the Cowboys, I wish I could have gone!" my response is usually "Oh yeah? What are they, a baseball team?" with a smirk.

To get the (first date) bang with this girl I let my inner redneck out and steered the convo to masculine topics I was more familiar than she was - I know we talked about guns and 4x4 and I did take her out to do both, probably running a chainsaw, presumably work in construction, etc. I have also lost girls by being too redneck before and also at the mere mention of owning a gun, so calibration is necessary.

I had a girl last weekend telling me that guys in her city were pussies, gave her a line about running a chainsaw, was banging her within the hour. Obviously phrased in a way that was making a joke and not qualifying myself to her. End of the day though, you can't get 'em all, and doesn't sound like she was too much of a loss.

Yeah definitely High T and masculine, even her face was sort of hard.

I started thinking about it more and more on the drive to the airport this morning.

It does make sense - I don't think I have a softness about me - but I more than likely fell into her frame.

I could use more fighter in me absolutely.

I don't usually deal with jock girls that are all about sports, which is also a red flag.


You're definitely right - she definitely constantly shit tested me - I was doing pretty well till the pool table.

I didn't exactly stay quiet, just laughed at her fucking up, a sly remark here and there.

I think she was still debating on pursuing me further up until that point.


I should've just cut and run after that - I'll definitely do so next time if a girl ever does that.


Thing is I wasn't intimidated in the slightest, maybe I was a bit checked out after the roomate, cussing, pro ball player comments.

She kind of felt like she had nothing to offer outside of work and sports.


I absolutely agree, she'll need a pro jock to keep her in line, not just your run of the mill player.


I'm all about man stuff, you know what's odd is that, it could possibly be an off night.

I was exhausted at work, was tired at the gym, low energy, heavy breathing, and was tired. That definitely had something to do with it.


Sounds like I need to build a new AR or upgrade parts on the Harley

We can't be all things to all girls.

Trying, for the sake of a notch, is where you can unwittingly cede frame.

A good lesson here.

Only your ego makes you question yourself, why you 'lost' this one.

But really there's no need.

That's just life.

Gotta stay congruent to your own frame, obviously be adaptable, but not shift your frame for just one girl.

Indeed it is, I got a few decent plates right now, more leads, and a vacation coming up.

I'll forget this even happened in the coming days.

kaotic,

I don't know what MediumRare is on about softness.

This chick is a sports slut.

They are rampant in SoCal. Especially hockey, baseball, and MMA hoes. The surfer groupies seem a lot nicer to deal with and have a more laid-back artistic hippy side, although they have standards that are about as high.

The only guys the sport hoes fall for are minors, pro players, or what I have seen are ex-college football/baseball player types that are gigantic like Samoan bouncers at clubs.

I am talking guys that are 215-260 lbs 6'3"+ of raw muscle with full sleeve tatts.

They need guys that are cartoonishly hypermasculine to turn them feminine.

Witty remarks and delayed texting won't do it for these chicks. Their primal thoughts are thinking can you beat their ex-boyfriend minor league player on the field or in a fight. They are also a huge pain in the ass like that younger brother or cousin that wants to constantly compete and you want to punch in the face, yet you cannot.

I am 6'4" 200+ athletic, played a lot of different traditional sports through high school and they barely give me any daylight.

You can still bang those chicks.
It's a question of
- do you want to do the work?
- what's the fruit for your efforts?

WIA

Definitely a ball and puck slut for sure. (All her photos were at sports venues)

Yeah I think that's what MR is leading to - High T Sports slut needs hyper masculine guy.

That's why when she told me her friends in her fantasy are all pro ballers, it was a red flag and make sense.

If that's what her "friends" base consist of, you know it's even a higher level of dude for her to date or fuck.


Definitely not in that category.

And fuck your 6'4 200+ Chad Thundercock self

I kid, but yeah sports sluts are absolutely abundant - they just try so fucking hard to be one of the dudes.

(09-08-2016 01:07 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  You can still bang those chicks.
It's a question of
- do you want to do the work?
- what's the fruit for your efforts?

WIA

You'll always want the bang.

Worth the work ?

Constant shit tests, head butting, guy talk.

Probably not, when you can get a more feminine girls, a dime a dozen.


Fruits ?

Just the bang probably.

She'll be comparing you to her pro ball friends, her stand group of guys, you'll probably bang a few times before she ghosts, or think she can do better.

She's a cleat chaser looking for that pro who'll lock her down.