We fucked about 5-6 times randomly throughout the last 2 years. We talk a lot just for fun but haven't been talking lately and she's been cold to me.

So I made a mistake. Asked a girl to meet on Sunday night, and she said she was busy but she's available in the weekdays after that. I replied "Ok, see you next week then" or something like that, I didn't choose a specific date which I believe is a mistake. It's suppose to be our second meeting.

Wait for her or re-initiate? If yes, how do I do it?

(09-27-2016 03:09 PM)RustyShackleford Wrote:  

(09-27-2016 09:15 AM)papaiela Wrote:  Her: Sends me her work schedule. Oups wrong person my bad

Me: So this is the crazy Romanian girl

Her: Hey boo! Yes it's me... Mariana... We should hangout bb you're pretty cute Sorry I sent you my schedule because I have a colleague with the same name as you... I thought it was him

Me: No worries

Me: Sunday night is good for u?

Her: I can't tonight babe because I have a family dinner but I will text you later so that we can see each other one day this week (Kiss emoticon)

Her: Texting is better than whatsapp because I don't have a data plan on my phone (Kiss emoticon)

I haven't replied yet because I don't know what I am dealing with.

What do you guys think?

She's sending emoticons and gave lots of signs of interest. Why are you worried? Get her out and see what happens.

She didn't answer my last text on Wednesday. I re-initiated today:

Me: Hey u! Tomorrow is my cat's birthday down for a drink

Her: I don't like drinking but I'd love to pet your cat though
I work 12-9:30 pm

I don't have a cat and I will probably make up something and have her laugh.

During our interaction she mentioned that she had a boyfriend but I didn't really believe it. Now it seems to me that she doesn't really want to go out with me because of it.

I want to answer that I can pick her up from work and then we'll celebrate with the cat. What do you guys think?

Tl;dr- Met online and she wants to meet for lunch on a weekday on the first date. Naturally I said no to a situation where we sit across from each other. On a dinner table. With no alcohol. In broad daylight. Plus saying yes meant me handing the ropes over to her so I said nah.

This morning she texted me again saying she'd deleted the app we met on and that I'd be the only guy she met from there. So how do I proceed?

put your foot down. Pick a time that works for you Saturday and stick with it, " I'm going to check out y place around x time, join me"

If she can't commit to a simple public meet and doesn't rebuttle with a time that works for her…she is wasting your time

^^Thanks for a great response, I agree but since I firmly believe that positive reinforcement trumps negative, I'll need something warm and faggoty sounding to lead into that.

(10-05-2016 08:45 AM)the Thing Wrote:  ^^Thanks for a great response, I agree but since I firmly believe that positive reinforcement trumps negative, I'll need something warm and faggoty sounding to lead into that.

Here's some positive reinforcement. You can improve a LOT in your texts:

HER: 12 words in 1 message.
YOU: 39 words in 3 messages. You counter her joke weakly and fall into her frame instead of giving her any kind of jab back or ignoring it. What is "great" about meeting her? You are already putting her on a pedestal. You could've said what you said with a simple, "Busy all week, day trip Friday, drinks Saturday?" I advise AGAINST telling a girl your complete schedule, better to leave some mystery in it unless you're just doing incredibly amazing things that she would be jealous of and want to pursue you to be a part of.

HER: 16 words in 3 messages, no punctuation, no excitement.
YOU: 10 words in 2 messages. You express disappointment in her not liking drinks (not sure what that's supposed to gain you). You then qualify coffee to her to find out if she's a fan. Instead, assume the sale. Say, "Coffee/tea then"

HER: 13 words in 1 message
YOU: 15 words in 2 messages. She responds to the ONLY good texting from you (which is the joke lightly making fun of her).

HER: 12 words in 1 message, but 8 of them are a positive response to your joke. She may still be interested, but you need to switch your tactic. The "And yes, I will" part isn't that positive as the whole thing gives me a let's just be friends vibe, but it's a good sign she didn't meet anyone from the site and you got her texting you still.

I think the safest play is to go radio silent on her until you have something cool to take a picture of and send to her (perhaps while on your trip) with no commentary. Wait for her response unless you have something really witty to add to the picture.

Make her interested in your life and draw her in. She needs to be chasing you, not the other way around. Your desire to make things "positive reinforcement" is disingenuous. You should punish bad behavior and reward good behavior. That is life.

The ONE good outcome you got from the exchange was when you punished her bad behavior by making fun of her without being over the top mean.

She loved it.

Don't buy in to the way society says you should treat women.

I asked this girl out once, for the same day date,and she declined. I got back to her last night with "Are you still alive"
   

I'm thinking of joking we'll have to go volunteering afterwards. But should I insist on an evening date or go for a morning hike. Morning coffee, no way.

(10-05-2016 08:42 PM)duedue Wrote:  I'm thinking of joking we'll have to go volunteering afterwards. But should I insist on an evening date or go for a morning hike. Morning coffee, no way.

I don't get the volunteering joke, maybe I was missing an image.

I'd go for the morning coffee. Worst case you waste a few minutes of time meeting up with her and can go about your day. Morning hike as a first date is too much investment, but you do have the benefit that even if you don't like her you can just do your hike and enjoy nature. Hike isn't much of a screen other than she will have to wear exercise clothing which can be somewhat revealing.

EDIT: Actually it sounds like maybe you went out for an early night date? If that's the case, the morning hike isn't too bad if the first date went real well and you are both into being active. Morning coffee would be weird as a second date.

Yeah, we went on an instant date first, although not much a result of my game but that I had two free tickets to a concert.

Don't do this often, but girl has been really tough. Met her from online, looks very hot, 31, Ukrainian, we have some mutual high end friends, she looks legit(education/career, etc). Im 42. She looks pretty high quality. I have been pursuing her over Happn and text for like 4 weeks. She hardly responds back to my texts, but eventually does. My last text a week ago she didnt respond.

Today I said "happy friday", she said who is this, I sent a pic. Then no reply. Four hours later I say "when you wake up after fainting, give me a ring" she texts back, "humble huh? lol" I ask what shes up to, she says something dumb. Still very blasé. It annoyed me.

So I wrote;

"Getting the vibe you are not that interested"
"You have a good one"

And with that I ask; was this a bitch move? Part of me things so. I could have played the game, but with no investment from her it just got really annoying to keep trying to chase her over text, with little or no interest from her. Given our mutuals and the type of people they roll with, this could be a screening move by her, if she has money and/or is hot.

(10-07-2016 08:25 PM)Vaun Wrote:  Don't do this often, but girl has been really tough. Met her from online, looks very hot, 31, Ukrainian, we have some mutual high end friends, she looks legit(education/career, etc). Im 42. She looks pretty high quality. I have been pursuing her over Happn and text for like 4 weeks. She hardly responds back to my texts, but eventually does. My last text a week ago she didnt respond.

Today I said "happy friday", she said who is this, I sent a pic. Then no reply. Four hours later I say "when you wake up after fainting, give me a ring" she texts back, "humble huh? lol" I ask what shes up to, she says something dumb. Still very blasé. It annoyed me.

So I wrote;

"Getting the vibe you are not that interested"
"You have a good one"

And with that I ask; was this a bitch move? Part of me things so. I could have played the game, but with no investment from her it just got really annoying to keep trying to chase her over text, with little or no interest from her. Given our mutuals and the type of people they roll with, this could be a screening move by her, if she has money and/or is hot.

Just hit NEXT.

As a Russian who gets to deal with Russian (I mean post USSR, Ukrainian, Russian, Kazakh, Moldovan etc.) women I can tell you that most of them want a man to "chase" them to prove that he's worthy of her time and attention.
I'm actually dealing with one Russian chick who takes her sweet fucking time to reply to texts which annoys me and makes wanna just next her.

(10-07-2016 08:25 PM)Vaun Wrote:  Don't do this often, but girl has been really tough. Met her from online, looks very hot, 31, Ukrainian, we have some mutual high end friends, she looks legit(education/career, etc). Im 42. She looks pretty high quality. I have been pursuing her over Happn and text for like 4 weeks. She hardly responds back to my texts, but eventually does. My last text a week ago she didnt respond.

Today I said "happy friday", she said who is this, I sent a pic. Then no reply. Four hours later I say "when you wake up after fainting, give me a ring" she texts back, "humble huh? lol" I ask what shes up to, she says something dumb. Still very blasé. It annoyed me.

So I wrote;

"Getting the vibe you are not that interested"
"You have a good one"

And with that I ask; was this a bitch move? Part of me things so. I could have played the game, but with no investment from her it just got really annoying to keep trying to chase her over text, with little or no interest from her. Given our mutuals and the type of people they roll with, this could be a screening move by her, if she has money and/or is hot.

Need a little help here. I just met this chick a few days ago and she's only in my city for about a week.




Not sure if I should invite her to another event on Sunday or if I should start busting her chops?

I was thinking of writing something along the lines of "your plans could be so much better"

Okay I texted her: "Ur plans could be so much better" and her response was

"And so could your pick up lines. Lmao"

WTF is she reading this forum?

She's dodging the fuck out of you. Too busy. You're chasing her and she's just batting away your offers like flies. Eject.

So no response then?

(10-14-2016 06:32 PM)Borealis Wrote:  So no response then?

Probably.

Although there's always the nuclear option:

"c u next tuesday"

Yep delete her number. The only thing she gave you was asking for your snapchat, which really just means she wanted to add another person to her list to mass send her annoying ass snaps to.

Haha that's gold. Will give it a shot.

Quote:Probably.

Although there's always the nuclear option:

"c u next tuesday"

Just used that. Her response:

"No sense of humor. You should've joined us!"

Met a chick at a coffee shop. I had actually seen her there before and we work in the same type of field so we hit it off. She sits at my table and initiates conversation with me once again. We talk for a bit, I say "I am taking off but we should hang out sometime." She responds, "I have a boyfriend but we could do something like study together." I say nothing to that and just give her my phone. She types her number in but before I can save it, I get a call and the number disappears (though I do not realize it). She then finds me on facebook (I did not give her my last name so she must have looked me up due to my place of employment). I do not accept friend requests from females as I see multiple girls and do not want any drama on my page. How should I proceed...

1. Message her on facebook implying she is stalking me initially, then stating that her number did not save so she should give me it again.
2. Send a quick, very brief message asking for her number again bc I lost it.
3. Telling her I lost it, so give her mine and say text me yours.
4. Not use facebook at all, hope I run into her again and then get her number again in person.

I have some hope that I can pull off the lay, though obviously the boyfriend thing makes things less certain. She could just be attention whoring. Thoughts?

Do you guys think I should shoot her a restart text? Figured I have nothing to lose since she's leaving soon.

I'm currently using a variation on Vlad's "Serbian Notch" profile. Mine is tailored to my being an older man (early 40's).

Pretty direct:



Matched on Tinder on Tuesday, 27, full body pics, I'd put her at a 7-7.5.

Some Tinder banter back and forth, she's "the broken", not the heartbreaker.

Me:"Glad you're not a heartbreaker"
Me: "Or so you say"
Her: Well, I'm not, so.."
Me: "Sounds like you're here for the fun like I am"
Her: "Eh, well, I'm not a slut"
Me: "Neither am I. I don't put out on the first date"
Her: "Yeah I don't on the second either"
Her: "Or the third"
Me: "I don't put out. I put in"
Her: "OMG"

Some banter about the height difference (makes an interesting mental image), then I tell her I might be in her area for work this week, and I see drinks in her future.

Her: "You do !"

Gave her my number to text me. She followed through. And she's down for meeting for a drink.

Didn't text again until Thursday, responded to a text of hers from Tuesday. More chatter, and I was supposed to be in her area yesterday (I travel for work). Work sent me in the alternate direction instead, so I wasn't able to be in her town yesterday. Work told me yesterday I might be that way today, but I was sent in the other direction again today.

Home for the moment, and I'm not feeling like driving an hour (to see her) right now. If the text exchanges were more defining (unless I'm not seeing it), I might make the ride, but I'm not up for spending two hours round trip in my car for 'a drink'.

I'd like to keep her on the hook until I can get in her area, which could be sometime in the next couple of weeks.

Any ideas for a 'back burner' type text would be appreciated.

(10-14-2016 05:18 PM)Borealis Wrote:  Need a little help here. I just met this chick a few days ago and she's only in my city for about a week.




Not sure if I should invite her to another event on Sunday or if I should start busting her chops?

I was thinking of writing something along the lines of "your plans could be so much better"

(10-14-2016 06:34 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  Yep delete her number. The only thing she gave you was asking for your snapchat, which really just means she wanted to add another person to her list to mass send her annoying ass snaps to.

Okay I just sent a restart text today with

Me: So how was your "lol night life tour"

Her: Roses are red, violets are blue. I have five fingers, and only the middle one likes you. C U Next Tuesday

Not sure how to interpret that. Is this some clever way of blowing me off or is she being sarcastic?

Should I try and go for logistics?

Thinking of responding with : "Was just cleaning the bathroom and though about you"

or "My middle finger can beat up your middle finger" (sounds cheesy)

or sending her an image of a giant middle finger and a rose.

or ignore everything she said and go straight in for logistics

Edit: Just texted her
Me: "Well see...grabing some drinks with friends in ues. See you there at 7."
Me: "Only your middle finger can come tho"