How much do you stay in contact with a girl you're seeing if she's on vacation?

Been seeing this girl since early June (written about her in this thread before). I've been trying to distance myself a bit from her as I've fallen for her quite fast. She went with her sister to visit family in Malta for a week and comes back tomorrow. I know she's out having a good time. We spent the weekend prior to that together.

I've always been burned after a girl comes back from vacation, so I went into this going firm no contact unless she initiates. She wrote a long text 2 days into her trip, slightly drunk I gather, basically saying how much she missed me and wished I was there. I replied half a day later, reciprocating and sent a follow up text asking how her vacation's going so far. She sent a long reply saying all is well which I didn't reply to. Since then, no contact on either part.

Should I send her a text? My gut actually tells me I'm overgaming right now and being too aloof. We normally go a few days without texting but 4 texts in a week is scarce even for us.

I'm follow the advice of you guys and gaming other girls, albeit half-heartedly since my mind's stuck on this one. This cute little fitness-freak from work that I always tease keeps hinting that she wants to go rock-climbing...

I don't think there's anything wrong with pinging a girl sparingly when she's on vacation. Just keep your texts short and limited to statements and not needy questions. Or share something cool you're doing at the moment and tease her that it's better than whatever she's doing on her vacation.

(08-05-2015 10:42 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  My gut actually tells me I'm overgaming right now and being too aloof.

Sometimes your subconscious picks up on subtleties that aren't otherwise obvious. So go with your gut.

That said, vacations can be a great time to take stock of the relationship and see things for how they are:

If the feelings were real, they'll still be there when she gets back. But if the relationship was built on game, then one or both of you will want move on after the time apart.

(08-05-2015 11:20 AM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

(08-05-2015 10:42 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  My gut actually tells me I'm overgaming right now and being too aloof.

Sometimes your subconscious picks up on subtleties that aren't otherwise obvious. So go with your gut.

That said, vacations can be a great time to take stock of the relationship and see things for how they are:

If the feelings were real, they'll still be there when she gets back. But if the relationship was built on game, then one or both of you will want move on after the time apart.

I see what you're saying. I miss her, and I think she misses me. Maybe I should send her a ping. We made plans before she went away for me to spend the next weekend in her city anyway.

If she's in her 20s then she probably has snapchat. I've used snapchat as a means to ping her and just stay on her mind. I'll send a picture of myself staring off into space with the caption "game: what am I looking at" or something like that.

(08-05-2015 11:26 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  I miss her, and I think she misses me. Maybe I should send her a ping. We made plans before she went away for me to spend the next weekend in her city anyway.

Yeah man I don't see anything wrong here. Sounds like she is more than just a fling to you.

Just don't use the words "I miss you" or anything cheesy like that. The act of your message will be enough to let her know.

(08-05-2015 11:31 AM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

(08-05-2015 11:26 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  I miss her, and I think she misses me. Maybe I should send her a ping. We made plans before she went away for me to spend the next weekend in her city anyway.

Yeah man I don't see anything wrong here. Sounds like she is more than just a fling to you.

Just don't use the words "I miss you" or anything cheesey like that. The act of your message will be enough to let her know.

Of course not. Pinging her with a pic of me and a cute puppy I'm watching right now. "Puppy, say hey to *girl* - she's a fly bitch". Thanks for the insights guys.

(08-05-2015 11:38 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  "Puppy, say hey to *girl* - she's a fly bitch". Thanks for the insights guys.

Don't do that...

(08-05-2015 11:55 AM)OregonToSoCal Wrote:  

(08-05-2015 11:38 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  "Puppy, say hey to *girl* - she's a fly bitch". Thanks for the insights guys.

Don't do that...

Hah, shiiii-eeet.

(08-05-2015 11:55 AM)OregonToSoCal Wrote:  

(08-05-2015 11:38 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  "Puppy, say hey to *girl* - she's a fly bitch". Thanks for the insights guys.

Don't do that...

Haha I actually thought it was a pretty funny line.

It would have to be the right type of girl though. I can see how it would not be so good on a lot of chicks.

(08-05-2015 12:15 PM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

(08-05-2015 11:55 AM)OregonToSoCal Wrote:  

(08-05-2015 11:38 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  "Puppy, say hey to *girl* - she's a fly bitch". Thanks for the insights guys.

Don't do that...

Haha I actually thought it was a pretty funny line.

It would have to be the right type of girl though. I can see how it would not be so good on a lot of chicks.

You're right, you have to calibrate it to your own personal style and the girl you're sending it to. It's definitely not my style but that's not important at this time

It's funny when guys bring their girls to the gym and kiss their girls at the gym.

I was in a cable rope triceps set and this Persian/Arab dude gets shot down not once but 3 times trying to kiss his white girlfriend.

I literally had to stop my workout and turnaround to stifle my laughter.

She has this semi pissed off look on her face, then he does some kneeling cable crunches, and she looks straight at me (I'm ignoring her). Then they leave.

It's pretty clear who controls that relationship, when a dude is begging for affection in public. I'll never get PDA like that it's semi-needy.

(08-05-2015 12:51 PM)kaotic Wrote:  It's funny when guys bring their girls to the gym and kiss their girls at the gym.

I was in a cable rope triceps set and this Persian/Arab dude gets shot down not once but 3 times trying to kiss his white girlfriend.

I literally had to stop my workout and turnaround to stifle my laughter.

She has this semi pissed off look on her face, then he does some kneeling cable crunches, and she looks straight at me (I'm ignoring her). Then they leave.

It's pretty clear who controls that relationship, when a dude is begging for affection in public. I'll never get PDA like that it's semi-needy.

There's a really odd German bodybuilder at my gym who only seems to have chinese friends and a chinese girlfriend. (I once overheard him telling his friends that he could be "the greatest bodybuilder in the world"...no he couldn't).

Anyway, often I'll come in first thing in the morning to find her sitting on his lap on a bench in the middle of the weights area whispering sweet nothings into his ear.

It's pitiful. I laugh at him openly (he needs a slap to be honest).

one forum motto is "leave her better than when you met her", but are we just creating alpha widows (for plates/mini-LTRs/LTR)?

That ain't this forum's motto.
That's from the relatively blue pill "pua" era.

Times have changed

WIA

Makes sense. I have seen this thrown around a few times but could never reconcile it.

I need to tattoo the 'always be closing' mantra on the back of my eyebrows.

Went on an okc date last weekend. Things were going well, good vibes both ways. I invite her back to my pad but resists 'have to get up early for work', so I settle for a quick make out in a park near our date venue, thinking it'll be a lay up a couple days later when I'm back in town.

Tonight I get the text saying she's been dating another guy and doesn't 'feel right' seeing other people anymore. This girl was NOT giving off slut vibes, and seemed more into me than several other girls that I did end up banging.

Lesson learned: 1) Always keep escalating, its better to get come on too strong then too soft.

2) I was too passive. I let her 'nice girl' vibe keep me from pushing as hard as I should have.

3) It burns to know it was in your grasp and let it slip away, and let another dude beat you to the punch.

(08-05-2015 12:51 PM)kaotic Wrote:  It's funny when guys bring their girls to the gym and kiss their girls at the gym.

I was in a cable rope triceps set and this Persian/Arab dude gets shot down not once but 3 times trying to kiss his white girlfriend.

I literally had to stop my workout and turnaround to stifle my laughter.

She has this semi pissed off look on her face, then he does some kneeling cable crunches, and she looks straight at me (I'm ignoring her). Then they leave.

It's pretty clear who controls that relationship, when a dude is begging for affection in public. I'll never get PDA like that it's semi-needy.

Gooooood! Let the hater run through you!



Lifter's lounge guys will know I'm a heavy hater when it comes to guys with their girls at the gym.

I think the WORST is when you see a bodybuilder, good looking guy, solid tan, nice hair, big muscles, with a frumpy looking girl who doesn't lift. It cracks me up! So whenever I see bodybuilders with hot girlfriends, I respect the game.

That being said the best PDA is smacking girls' asses in public. For no reason. Works great at the gym, because you can play it off as a "good set, sport." Guys will have no doubt that you are banging her. Girls will have no doubt that you lay solid pipe.

(08-05-2015 09:18 PM)redbeard Wrote:  That being said the best PDA is smacking girls' asses in public. For no reason. Works great at the gym, because you can play it off as a "good set, sport." Guys will have no doubt that you are banging her. Girls will have no doubt that you lay solid pipe.

BIG fan of this, hell my main will do it to me from time to time also.

I make it a point to smack any girls ass I'm with on a date, to prove a point.

Does anybody else ever get the feeling that the fuck gods don't want you to lay pipe on a specific girl?

I was set to smash a girl about a week ago. As she is on her way she sends me a pic of her car smoking with the hood open saying she needs to reschedule.

Last night at about 1130pm. She drunk texts me calling me papi, saying she needs to get dicked down. I was asleep about 1115pm and didn't wake up until 6am. She was asleep by that time.

I've been really wanting to hit her too...DAMN YOU FUCK GODS!!!!!

Why didn't I dress up today.

Train malfunction, took a new route.
Chilling, gathering my thoughts for the day.

Dc Smoke show gets on the train. She's got the tasteful yet tight black dress, fashionable heels, skinny, mini tattoo on the inside of her wrist. Best way to describe her, Pretty and dressed up version of Cassidy Klein.

For whatever reason, probably them heels, she sits next to me and is generally pleasant.

Little weirded out by her not affording me my black male privilege of always having the seat to myself, but it's not uncommon for a pretty girl to sit next to me.

This is DC, so some tourists get on. Mom and two boys.

The boys were absolutely captivated by this chick, staring hard. And as the situational opener appears, it's time to get off the train.

WIA

(08-06-2015 12:55 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  Why didn't I dress up today.

Train malfunction, took a new route.
Chilling, gathering my thoughts for the day.

Dc Smoke show gets on the train. She's got the tasteful yet tight black dress, fashionable heels, skinny, mini tattoo on the inside of her wrist. Best way to describe her, Pretty and dressed up version of Cassidy Klein.

For whatever reason, probably them heels, she sits next to me and is generally pleasant.

Little weirded out by her not affording me my black male privilege of always having the seat to myself, but it's not uncommon for a pretty girl to sit next to me.

This is DC, so some tourists get on. Mom and two boys.

The boys were absolutely captivated by this chick, staring hard. And as the situational opener appears, it's time to get off the train.

WIA

Were you in DC last November? I was taking the train to McPherson...or maybe int was DuPont. And I was eyeing this chick standing close to the door. She was super sexy. Short business skirt and professional attire with heels, blonde hair. Seemed to be the bitchy type. I spotted a casual looking black guy open her. Really dark too. Can't really remember his style.

He was extremely smooth. In a few seconds, he disarmed her and she stopped looking at her phone and was giggling, high-fiving him, and doing all this other shit. I didn't hear the conversation, but her face was lit up like a jack-o-lantern. Some passengers got on the train as I approached my destination, and a lot of them looked ultra peeved at the interaction. But it's DC, so...

He got her number fairly quickly and they disappeared during the next stop. Is was so smooth. The train got crowded fast, so the person I was with was getting groped and they didn't get to see any of it go down.

It's doable. I've opened on the train in nyc before.
I just don't do them enough to be totally comfortable.

If advanced game is being an all around player, that's a big gap for my urban game.

Taking a bird's eye view, there's nothing special about street, transit, bookstore, coffee shop, or mall game. It's just see, step, spit..

But there's a mental block. An attractive woman gets approached all day and everywhere, but individual guys only really come into their own of everything is just right.

My countrymen never had this problem

WIA

You can definitely get #s on the subway in NYC, you just gotta have game. And be willing to deal with flakes.

(08-06-2015 03:09 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  But there's a mental block. An attractive woman gets approached all day and everywhere

*snip*

Gotta agree with you that there's a mental block, but attractive women sometimes DON'T get approached if they're attractive enough or if they do it's with a lot of weak game. Your solid game is like a breath of fresh air to them.