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Giving up your seat for women
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Phoenix Offline
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Post: #26
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 03:32 AM)Pride male Wrote:  Are you telling me if a boner fide 10 was standing next to you you wouldnt offer her a seat? Yeah right. I know I would.

Why? You give a girl concessions equals she fucks you? I didn't know men still think like this.
08-01-2015 07:50 AM
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robreke Offline
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Post: #27
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 02:20 AM)JonJon Wrote:  I want to discuss the chivalrous act of giving up one's seat for a woman. Living in NYC and using the subway everyday, I see men give their seats up all the time. And I wonder about this gesture.

Today I was put in an awkward situation. Three women and two children got on the PATH train. They were a family: a young middle aged grandmother, her two daughters, and two school age children. I was sitting in the single corner seat, and somehow they all gravitated towards me and the pole that was near my seat. My space was a bit crowded but I didn't fret too much because the commute was only 20 mins.

Then the awkwardness came. One of the women started to make a joke about how the young boy, when he was even younger, would get on the train, complain about not having a seat, and eventually someone would give up their seat for him. They talked and reminisced and laughed about it as if it was the cutest thing ever. During this time I could feel their eyes on me, watching to see if I would crack under the pressure of the conversation and offer up my seat. I didn't. Then the grandmother started talking about how nice it is when people give up their seats for small children, and how her favorite seat, especially on a hot summer day like today, is the corner seat (where I was sitting). Again, a direct reference to me and my seat, I did nothing. I continued to stare at the wall and gather my thoughts.

The train was crowded, and I was not about to give up my seat so I could stand in discomfort for some strange woman/child whom I've never met, and who all appeared to be able-bodied enough to make it through the 20 min train ride.

I understand giving up one's seat to the obviously injured/disabled. I've done it before and I would do it again. But I don't believe in giving up my seat because an entitled woman feels entitled to it. In fact, this made me even more resolved in my effort to not give up my seat. I was not going to reinforce the already grand sense of entitlement that women walk around with each day.

I mean, it gets so pathetic sometimes, when I see grown men jumping, literally tripping over themselves, physically and verbally, to give up their seats to healthy young women. It actually makes me cringe. So I stayed on the train, and stayed in my seat until it was time to get off.

Now, we could argue the other side of the fence and say, well, what if it was my grandmother, mother, sister, etc? And to that I would say then she is no different in thinking she deserves someone's seat. Aside from suffering from some obvious injury, any female family member of mine who thinks they deserve a man's seat just because they are a woman is a part of that same female entitlement that does not deserve to be rewarded.

I don't give up my seat unless in my mind I assess the situation to be absolutely necessary. The very old and weak, or pregnant women about to pop soon, etc. I was curious as to what you other players think about the matter.

Would you give up your seat, and if so, under what circumstances?

^ These women were dropping shit tests or , more aptly, running passive aggressive comments within earshot of you.

A passive aggressive attack is a classic of women. They can't be overtly aggressive so they say things like these women were saying, to be covertly suggestive or "aggressive" to get their point across and hopefully, achieve their goals.

"oh I remember the good ole days when young men would give up their seats...blah blah" not saying it directly to you , but trying to guilt you.

Way to hold frame. In those situations, I just like to play dumb like I don't even hear or notice them there. I'm in my own world.

So these women, yeah, I wouldn't have given my seat. Now when is 'appropriate' ? Whenever you feel like it. Many of the others here have already stated ideal situations.

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08-01-2015 09:35 AM
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Post: #28
RE: Giving up your seat for women
I do give up my seat for elderly men and women, and sometimes women with kids. I don't make a big deal of it. It's just the polite thing to do. I don't bother with women who are physically able to stand for long periods of time.

I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
08-01-2015 09:36 AM
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elcidcampeador Offline
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Post: #29
RE: Giving up your seat for women
I always stand on the subway if it's crowded and sit if its empty.

I just recently got in a pretty heated verbal argument with an overweight African-American 35 year old 2 on the Amtrak after she refused to move her purse from the window seat and let me sit next to her.

She wouldn't budge, so I politely asked her if I could see the ticket she purchased for both of her seats to verify that she was entitled to both. It got pretty messy and all the other passengers were laughing at her. The conductor eventually told her to move her shit and I had a nice awkward 45 minute ride next to her. Naturally, she got off the train in Bridgeport, CT.

Note: This was a sold out train, so I wasn't purposely trying to be a huge douche. I'd obviously take another seat if there was one available.
08-01-2015 10:34 AM
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RIslander Offline
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Post: #30
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 03:24 AM)Suits Wrote:  As for pregnant women, it's not so cut and dry. If she's pregnant, thin and is wearing a wedding ring, she gets my seat.

However, if she's not staying thin for her husband, I'll keep my seat and provide her with every opportunity to burn some calories standing. It's the least I can do.

I agree with this. Thin women with either internal or external children get the seat. Also, any elderly or injured person gets the seat.

Pretty, slender and feminine Thai women riding the BTS in heels also get the seat. Then I game them while they look up at me.
(This post was last modified: 08-01-2015 12:16 PM by RIslander.)
08-01-2015 12:15 PM
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Suits Offline
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Post: #31
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 12:15 PM)RIslander Wrote:  
(08-01-2015 03:24 AM)Suits Wrote:  As for pregnant women, it's not so cut and dry. If she's pregnant, thin and is wearing a wedding ring, she gets my seat.

However, if she's not staying thin for her husband, I'll keep my seat and provide her with every opportunity to burn some calories standing. It's the least I can do.

I agree with this. Thin women with either internal or external children get the seat. Also, any elderly or injured person gets the seat.

Pretty, slender and feminine Thai women riding the BTS in heels also get the seat. Then I game them while they look up at me.

The alpha move would be to have them sit on your lap while you game them.

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08-01-2015 12:26 PM
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amusedmastery Offline
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Post: #32
RE: Giving up your seat for women
Opening a door is a great opener (no pun intended) for some quick game/witty banter with a hot woman. Plus, as WIA states, you can check out the ass and all else as it wiggles past you.

I would hesitate to give up my seat though unless some of the exigent circumstances stated above were in effect. Feral Cats can stand. Run game on them while you're kicked back in your seat by asking with a smirk, "how are things up there at altitude?"
(This post was last modified: 08-01-2015 12:47 PM by amusedmastery.)
08-01-2015 12:45 PM
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mpr Offline
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Post: #33
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 03:32 AM)Pride male Wrote:  Are you telling me if a boner fide 10 was standing next to you you wouldnt offer her a seat? Yeah right. I know I would.

Offering your seat as an opener to a hot chick, or because you know it's a prerequisite to getting her phone number is totally different then offering your seat to a fat/post-wall entitled woman who won't give you anything in return.
08-01-2015 01:24 PM
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therealpoder Offline
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Post: #34
RE: Giving up your seat for women
Only if she pregnant, elderly or handicapped. Otherwise, I don't see the point.
08-01-2015 03:02 PM
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Tuthmosis Offline
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Post: #35
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 01:24 PM)mpr Wrote:  Offering your seat as an opener to a hot chick, or because you know it's a prerequisite to getting her phone number

Can you elaborate on this? I'm interested in learning this type of game.

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08-01-2015 03:03 PM
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The Beast1 Offline
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Post: #36
RE: Giving up your seat for women
Eh, i've lowered the amount of common courtesies I give out. I hold the door less and less for women. Though, I'll extend courtesies to other men most of the time. I don't see women deserving of it. Elderly women maybe. It's a gut thing.

As for the subway, I only give my seat up for the handicap and pregnant women (includes small babies). If they're old enough to stand, they're old enough to not need a seat.

Finally, being elderly isn't a handicap.
08-01-2015 05:45 PM
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Merenguero Offline
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Post: #37
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 07:15 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  call me old school, but I hold doors to look at ass.

Getting out of my seat for a broad? no blanket rule.

Aeroplane?

You knew that you couldn't lift your carry on above your head when you left the house.

WIA

This is a bit off-topic, but I think bringing a carry on on a plane is one of the dumbest moves ever. I realize that some guys travel with testosterone, which needs to be stored at room temperature. That is the only legitimate excuse I have ever heard for bringing a carry on or the like.
08-01-2015 06:13 PM
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Ruga Offline
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Post: #38
RE: Giving up your seat for women
I've given my seat to pregnant women but I won't lie, I will wait to see if anyone else in the cart makes the move first.

How about when you're on a crowded train and a seat opens up. Do you guys typically wait a second or two to see if anyone wants it or do take it as soon as you can?
(This post was last modified: 08-01-2015 06:21 PM by Ruga.)
08-01-2015 06:19 PM
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Suits Offline
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Post: #39
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 01:24 PM)mpr Wrote:  
(08-01-2015 03:32 AM)Pride male Wrote:  Are you telling me if a boner fide 10 was standing next to you you wouldnt offer her a seat? Yeah right. I know I would.

Offering your seat as an opener to a hot chick, or because you know it's a prerequisite to getting her phone number is totally different then offering your seat to a fat/post-wall entitled woman who won't give you anything in return.

Ya, I get what you are saying. I routinely lick the boots of women, because it's simply a prerequisite to getting their number. Just charge it to the game.

I'm the King of Beijing!
(This post was last modified: 08-01-2015 08:17 PM by Suits.)
08-01-2015 08:08 PM
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Fortis Away
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Post: #40
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 06:13 PM)Merenguero Wrote:  
(08-01-2015 07:15 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  call me old school, but I hold doors to look at ass.

Getting out of my seat for a broad? no blanket rule.

Aeroplane?

You knew that you couldn't lift your carry on above your head when you left the house.

WIA

This is a bit off-topic, but I think bringing a carry on on a plane is one of the dumbest moves ever. I realize that some guys travel with testosterone, which needs to be stored at room temperature. That is the only legitimate excuse I have ever heard for bringing a carry on or the like.

what about laptops? I'm always paranoid it'll get crushed by some dickhead mishandling it.

I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
08-01-2015 08:25 PM
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Beyond Borders Away
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Post: #41
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 06:13 PM)Merenguero Wrote:  
(08-01-2015 07:15 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  call me old school, but I hold doors to look at ass.

Getting out of my seat for a broad? no blanket rule.

Aeroplane?

You knew that you couldn't lift your carry on above your head when you left the house.

WIA

This is a bit off-topic, but I think bringing a carry on on a plane is one of the dumbest moves ever. I realize that some guys travel with testosterone, which needs to be stored at room temperature. That is the only legitimate excuse I have ever heard for bringing a carry on or the like.

lol One of the dumbest moves ever? Huh

What really bogges my mind is the spectrum of things some people allow to bother them about what other people do. What is it to you whether someone takes a carry on bag on a plane or not? Never mind the reason behind it: If you're so judgmental about such a trivial thing, I seriously shudder to imagine the fluctuations in your mood on a daily basis.

I'm not trying to offend you, but when I see people complain about something like this I envision a bitter and opinionated running dialogue going on in their head all the time. Would you say that is in any way an accurate description of your day-to-day experience of life? Does this not strike you as insignificant thing to have such a strong opinion about at all?

You've been a lot of places. As a world traveler, you're hammered with a mind-blowing array of different beliefs, philosophies, habits, and practices that ought to make you question every tiny thing you do, know, and believe. Do you not realize the people around you, in your work, on this forum, and walking on to the plane, represent just as diverse an array of mini-universes in the human experience?

If you ask me, life is really too short and complicated to worry yourself doing anything more but observing and taking it in.
(This post was last modified: 08-02-2015 03:17 AM by Beyond Borders.)
08-02-2015 03:05 AM
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Hardy Daytona Offline
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Post: #42
RE: Giving up your seat for women
I'll give up my seat for the elderly but not the pregnant.
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08-02-2015 08:31 AM
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Post: #43
RE: Giving up your seat for women
For only pregnant women, moms with kids, for kids, of course you give your seat.
08-02-2015 08:34 AM
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vinman Offline
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Post: #44
RE: Giving up your seat for women
I still do things for OLDER people or pregnant women. I will give up a seat, or hold a door, or even give them a hand with packages. I've even changed a few tires for older people. Younger women can fuck a cactus for all I care.

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08-02-2015 12:11 PM
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worldwidetraveler Offline
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Post: #45
RE: Giving up your seat for women
I think too many guys are overthinking this stuff. Maybe worried about being beta?

Anyway, I enjoy helping others. I have been known to help people push their broken down cars out of traffic. I have no problem holding open doors for both men or women. I will gladly give up a seat for someone weaker including a pregnant woman.

I do these things because I want too. If you don't want, don't do it. I get satisfaction out of helping people. Always have. I also like to think someone would do that for my family if they needed help.

There is nothing wrong with helping a fellow human being if you are doing it for the right reasons.
(This post was last modified: 08-02-2015 12:38 PM by worldwidetraveler.)
08-02-2015 12:25 PM
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Saweeep Offline
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Post: #46
RE: Giving up your seat for women
I would always give up a seat for a woman a generation older than me or above. The same is true for pensionable age men, women with small children, pregnant women and the disabled or infirm of any age. I would even give up my seat for an obese person. I may well disapprove of the lifestyle choices of many, if not all, of these people; however a momentary act of kindness has little to zero cost to myself. If that can alleviate another's discomfort, if even for a 5 minute train journey, then it is worth it.

I also stand up when women get up from or sit down at a table. I take my hat off when inside. I hold doors for pretty much everybody. I try not to swear in the company of women or elders. I apologise if someone else bumps into me.

Why do I do these things? Because I try my best to be a gentleman whenever circumstances allow. It is how I was brought up and what separates gentlemen from the rest of the hoi polloi that wander this green and pleasant land. It is as ingrained in me as not wearing brown shoes with a black belt or helping my opponent to his feet after a bout in the boxing ring.

It has absolutely nothing to do with being alpha/beta; people get way too caught up on these things. Partaking in ever dwindling traditional social customs is personally satisfying on a deep level.


I am an Englishman and no amount of deterioration of females or society is going to change my behaviour. I will not bend in the face of their societal destruction.
(This post was last modified: 08-02-2015 12:49 PM by Saweeep.)
08-02-2015 12:47 PM
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polar Offline
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Post: #47
RE: Giving up your seat for women
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08-02-2015 01:02 PM
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Post: #48
RE: Giving up your seat for women
(08-01-2015 03:32 AM)Pride male Wrote:  Are you telling me if a boner fide 10 was standing next to you you wouldnt offer her a seat? Yeah right. I know I would.

Of course I would offer her a seat.... on my face



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08-02-2015 01:51 PM
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Post: #49
RE: Giving up your seat for women
   
08-02-2015 03:04 PM
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Post: #50
RE: Giving up your seat for women
If she was bangable I might do it bacause I would prefer to be stood up while shes sat down, its a dominance thing I suppose. I would esnure she was aware of that by body language/tone/eye contact. Would feel like a dick sat at her feet like some kid.
(This post was last modified: 08-02-2015 03:15 PM by lush1.)
08-02-2015 03:10 PM
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