Post: #51

Last night, I found a girl on tinder who was down (see +1 thread). She was 39 and wasn't all that pretty, but had the tits and ass that barely passed the boner test, plus I was horny. Other than not fucking it up, the key to this bang was understanding "plausible deniability". I invited her back to my place and she said "your place? ok, but no sex". I said, "oh, no sex" with a dismissive wave, all nonchalant about it. 10 minutes at my place, bang, no LMR. Textbook.

I can do a lot better than this, but it's nice to give a newbie like me a jump start!

Post: #52

4 night game approaches last night, got blown out every time.

Did catch a girl giving me the eye, and I did approach but got cockblocked immediately. Bar was too crowded and there was no way I could isolate.

It was just a reminder that I hate night game and I feel out of my element there. DAY GAME or ONLINE GAME only for me, from now on.

Post: #53

What happened that led to failure? Anything you can spot with hindsight?

Post: #54

Nothing really that I can actually learn from. I just went up, smiled, and said "Hey!" to get their attention, and they turned their backs on me before I could spit out my follow up line. That's it. The one that gave me the eye, smiled back, but her fatty friend actually stepped in between us. Literal cockblock.

Post: #55

Just realized that all the places I went to & got blown out were at places that were extremely packed. Getting a drink from the bar takes 10-20 minutes.

I get claustrophobic in crowded places, I've always been this way. I'm much more comfortable in open spaces like lounges.

Post: #56

Got another day game 3 approaches in, nothing to write home about.

2 of them, opinion opened about whether a new sportscoat looked good on me. First one was 2 girls, one a mom and daughter. Daughter was giving massive IOIs, but no idea how to separate her from the mom. OH well. 2nd one was the employee of the store, good vibe, but I should have stayed and rambled more.

3rd was at coffee shop. "Excuse me, is that a good tablet?" Opened very well, and conversation lasted 2 minutes. Couldn't go further because no interest on her part.

Running total: 28 approaches, no new numbers.

Post: #57

Spammed some online game, and my week is booked already, except tomorrow night (which I'm reserving to myself only). It almost feels like cheating... now I understand those who say get out there and do day game, it forces you to improve your game and think on your feet.

I'll aim for 10 daytime approaches this week.

Post: #58

+1, 29th. Practiced my elderly chat with an ex model at in the break room (this was at work so I intentionally didn't move beyond the chit chat). It was about eating healthy, and I rambled about my cravings for crunchy and salty foods that flare up before I hit the sack. Towards the end of the conversation, she complimented me on my physique... pretty sure I could hit that if I wanted to, but I have a personal rule of not diddling where I work.

I can approach, I can open, but I am focusing on practicing elderly chat (my current weak spot) in order to bridge to getting a #/date. Then once I have a girl in front of me, drinks in hand, I'm good to go.

Post: #59

(03-07-2015 09:34 AM)CleanSlate Wrote:  It was just a reminder that I hate night game and I feel out of my element

I agree.

Like you, I feel out of my element with night game -- claustrophobia, anxiety, disinterest, etc. (I do not drink)

I gave up on night game 15 years ago when I was 25 years old.

I have no regrets. I think we can get plenty of girls and sex without having to stay up until the wee hours of the morning.

Here is a thread with more detailed info about "Healthy Gaming".

Post: #60

Did 4 more approaches tonight at the grocery store... and I sucked :/

1. This was more of a warm up, middle aged lady was looking at apples like I was. "Excuse me, do you know if these are organic?" (idk) Then I picked up an apple and rambled about how its shape was so perfect and the color was so red, unlike other apples that had some irregular shape to them. I don't think she seemed into the conversation, but she did say what kind of apples she liked. I agreed and talked about how sweeter those are as opposed to how tart the granny smiths are. Then after I ran out of gas, I ejected and rolled away.

2. I come across a nice looking chick and I stroll up to her, thinking I got this one in the bag. Once I get to her, I realize what she's looking at... baby food... and that kinda threw me off a bit. But I said, "Excuse me, do you know where the eggs are?" She said no, and I go "oh are you new around here?" (yes) "Yeah I'm also new here, I'm learning the layout and where everything is." She said "me too, I'm just looking at baby food". I didn't feel comfortable talking about baby food, so I just kept up some weak ramble about being new here for another minute, and ejected.

Only about 30 seconds after I moved off, I had an OH SNAP! moment... that would have been the perfect time to bring up my newborn niece and segue into all kinds of flavors about baby food. Damn. I got the eggs, and circled back to where she was, hoping to "bump" into her again and say "hey, i found the eggs, they were over there. by the way, what kind of baby food did you get? my niece was born a few weeks ago, and ..... " But she was at the cash register already

3. I think this one was the best one, yet. But I don't think the girl was interested. She was at one of those almond butter making machines, which I had never seen before. I rolled by her, gave a scrutinizing look at the machine, and said,

Me: "So you are making almond butter?"
Her: smiled a little and said "yes" as she was pulling down the lever and the almond butter was oozing out.
Me: "how does it do that??" with a totally confused and fascinated look.
Her: "I guess it just grinds all the nuts and pushes it all out."
Me: "fascinating how all that oil comes out when you grind the nuts. It looks dry up there, but apparently it holds so much oil that it just oozes out when you grind them, doesn't it?"
Her: nods "yes it does"
Me: "I wonder how it tastes, maybe better than the canned stuff."
Her: "I think it does, that's why I'm getting this stuff here."
Me: "Alright, I'm gonna have a taste" and I put my finger out under the dispenser, where a chunk of some almond butter was stuck on, and put it in my mouth...
She: looks at me expectedly...
Me: "Hmm, it's pretty good. A little bland at first, then the flavor really comes out slowly"
She: smiles, but doesn't turn her body towards me and does her own thing.

All this time, she was going about her own business, and never turned her body towards me... so it was really hard for me to continue the ramble.

4. As I was leaving the store, it was raining out and some people were hesitating. I walk up next to this chick and say "I wish I had my own chaffeur so he could pull up my car here." She laughs and says something that I didn't quite catch. Then she runs off into the rain, while I do the same.

So that's 33 total approaches. Only one number. 1 out of 33. *sigh* This shit ain't easy. Please tell me this gets easier with time! Or if it doesn't, just lie to me and say it does get easier so I can motivate myself more! haha. Maybe I'm expecting too much too early.

Post: #61

Awesome thread. Your ability to step outside your ego and really look at your self within reasoned mindfulness is impressive. All too often with game some men over do "fake it till you make it". Cobra and you (of the many many threads) seem to have an honesty that is; inspirational? Its awesome to hear about successes, i take value from failures. Your eject too early and lmr recounts remind me of my own mishaps and compound what i learn. Experience is the grand master teacher. Failure is not ever as such when we learn from it. Kudos. Bookmarked.

Post: #62

CleanSlate I don't know where you're located, but it will only get markedly easier than this if you can spark a girl's physical interest off the bat.

Get in better shape, dress better, look better. The physical signs off the bat give you more room to slip from indirect to more flirty.

Indirect is only a key to unlock the door. You need the looks and presence to push it to a date more often.

I am 29 and fear a day where I get old enough I feel like I need to start completely indirect with younger chicks. My plan has included living a much healthier lifestyle (little to no sun exposure on my face/neck, cigarette only if I am smoking with a new chick I am trying to bang)... exercising like my life depended on it, and constantly upping my style.

The last step is moving out of the U.S..

Post: #63

^I'm in Houston, am 35 years old but I look your age. Keeping sun exposure to a minimum and exercising almost everday helps, as does eating clean. I'm thinking my wardrobe needs a little work, though.

Post: #64

CleanSlate,

Love your effort. Getting to the point where you can elderly open and talk about whatever is in front of you is a major milestone to getting good at daygame, sales, or just being a fun, social person. You've gotten past that hurdle way faster than I ever did.

As others have responded and as you already know, you are ejecting too early and very rarely making a direct connection with the girl. I like Roosh's Day Bang model alot, but I think the book downplays the importance of making the conversation FUN. Just like at night, I think this is done best with humor and teasing - traditional flirting. This is what kicked my success up to the next level.

It has to be much more subtle and less douchey than at night, but I think its important.

-When she nearly, trips or stumbles on the sidewalk: "Whoa, careful over there!"
-When she's walking her dog and it barks/pisses/shits at a less than appropriate time, say something funny.
-Another example: at the grocery store, if she got a huge box of Lucky Charms in her carriage, I greatly prefer "Oh, your addicted to Lucky Charms too?" or "Damn, I haven't had those since 7th grade" to the textbook "Is that a good cereal? I've never had it"

Also, some semi-direct lines to show interest when you are a little deeper into the conversation:
"Oh because I figured blah blah blah because it looks like you take care of yourself/workout

I'm a silly and somewhat immature 27 year old, and I like to be funny throughout the day. This kind of stuff fits my personality. If you are comfortable with humor and teasing and are pretty confident you don't sound like a cornball, give it a shot. The semi-direct lines to show interest can be used immediately. Also, try to use situational openers when you can instead of the straight up elderly stuff - they will come off the most authentic. This will take some practice and failures.

All in all, great job.

Post: #65

Thanks for the post Eddie. I see other threads by those who have put in far more work than I have, talking about hundreds and hundreds of approaches. I think online game makes me too lazy to do day game, so I've decided to stop doing online game for a while.

As far as the elderly ramble goes, I think it is very effective at disarming their guards when they meet a random stranger... but I feel more than 1-2 minutes of ramble is too much because it feels like I'm only showing interest in the topic, not her.

Post: #66

+1: 34th

Will keep short. can barely type, I hit the weights really hard today. At apartment gym, saw a hottie doing intervals on the bike trainer. She had good form and cadence, so I got curious. Went up to her in between her reps, and asked what she's training for. Talked about biking and dropped bait about how I train for races. She smiled, and I introduced myself and got her name. I see her every now and then, so next time I see her I will say hello <her name> and shoot the shit for a bit, then get her #.

Post: #67

Rather than making one post for every single approach, I'm going to only post in this thread after I've done a nice batch of approaches and learned something new, or at the very least reinforced the past lessons I've learned.

3/21/15

35: Chilling at a bar that serves craft brews. A pair of girls sit next to me and order their beers. I ask them what beer they are drinking, and whether it is a special. She asks me what I’m drinking and we talk about stouts. Then I go into ‘What brings you here tonight?’ but the conversation stalls a bit. Few minutes later, I restart the conversation and get her name, but it doesn’t really go anywhere after that, so I eject.

3/22/15

36. “Excuse me, I was wondering which pair of sunglasses look better on me” tried them both on, said “that one”, and I just said “thanks” and ended the interaction. To keep this interaction going, I should have said “Why do you think this one looks better?” then ramble about the styles and materials of sunglasses, and segue into travel.

Saw another girl I wanted to approach at the grocery store, but wussed out completely. She was always moving, and I feel I have a harder time approaching moving targets. Maybe I’m just making excuses here?

37. Whole foods. Saw girl holding a shopping list. I go “so what’s cooking tonight? you have a list…” She smiles and goes “oh, nothing, just a list of what I need”. I start rambling about how I need to do the same because I always forget what I need to buy, and when I start cooking with my recipe, there’s always one thing I forgot. She laughs, but she steps away from me (IOD), so I eject.

38. Saw a girl with brussel sprouts in her cart, and I go “excuse me, where did you get these brussel sprouts?” After she tells me where, I start to say something further, but she turns away before I could get any words out.

39. Whole foods employee. I go “excuse me, where do I find pita chips?” She takes me to where they are, and I tell her I like the ones with sea salt. I get a bag, and I start talking about my recipes with pita chips, but she seemed preoccupied with getting back to work so I let her go.

40. Elevator in my apartment. She needed help in getting something inside the door, so I help her. “You moving in here?” “No, it’s just something new bla bla (I didn’t understand)” “Oh cool. When did you move here?” “We moved last December” Then she gets off at her floor before I could say anything. I noted she said “we” instead of “I” so she must be taken and living with her guy.

41. Coffee shop. Got my coffee, and opened a girl sitting at the bar with a nice looking tablet. I asked her if it was a good tablet, and did some elderly chat about that. Segued into what she’s working on, and what school she goes to… I told her that I tutor at her school (not true, but it will be eventually haha), but she wasn’t taking any of my bait.

Today’s takeaways:
- I’m still struggling to get past the elderly chat to more personal talk.
- I’m still talking myself out of approaching especially with moving targets.
- I feel that my lack of success as of late is starting to expose some of my limiting beliefs that I thought I had taken care of, but are more deeply rooted than I thought.
- I also think that my expectations are too high. I do remember reading Roosh’s Day Bang and he said for the first 100 approaches, you might get one number if you’re lucky. So maybe I’m really doing ok, I just have to practice and learn, and keep at it.

EDIT:
42. Got another one in before leaving the coffee shop. Got eye contact and a smile, and approached as I was leaving. Mind goes blank, and all I could muster was "hey it's a nice day!" Ughh, terrible opener. But she could not understand me, so I changed tacks and asked where she got her bag. Still could not understand me. Repeated myself, and she STILL could not understand me. So I ejected. That was probably the worst one since I started this year.

Just how it is... with my deaf accent, while many people can still understand me, and there are always some people who just cannot understand me to save their lives - not much I can really do about it. Also, next time I get eye contact and a smile, I probably should go direct and say "Hey, I saw you over here and I wanted to say hi! What's your name?" or something like that.

Post: #68

(03-22-2015 05:38 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  Rather than making one post for every single approach, I'm going to only post in this thread after I've done a nice batch of approaches and learned something new, or at the very least reinforced the past lessons I've learned.

3/21/15

35: Chilling at a bar that serves craft brews. A pair of girls sit next to me and order their beers. I ask them what beer they are drinking, and whether it is a special. She asks me what I’m drinking and we talk about stouts. Then I go into ‘What brings you here tonight?’ but the conversation stalls a bit. Few minutes later, I restart the conversation and get her name, but it doesn’t really go anywhere after that, so I eject.

3/22/15

36. “Excuse me, I was wondering which pair of sunglasses look better on me” tried them both on, said “that one”, and I just said “thanks” and ended the interaction. To keep this interaction going, I should have said “Why do you think this one looks better?” then ramble about the styles and materials of sunglasses, and segue into travel.

Saw another girl I wanted to approach at the grocery store, but wussed out completely. She was always moving, and I feel I have a harder time approaching moving targets. Maybe I’m just making excuses here?

37. Whole foods. Saw girl holding a shopping list. I go “so what’s cooking tonight? you have a list…” She smiles and goes “oh, nothing, just a list of what I need”. I start rambling about how I need to do the same because I always forget what I need to buy, and when I start cooking with my recipe, there’s always one thing I forgot. She laughs, but she steps away from me (IOD), so I eject.

38. Saw a girl with brussel sprouts in her cart, and I go “excuse me, where did you get these brussel sprouts?” After she tells me where, I start to say something further, but she turns away before I could get any words out.

39. Whole foods employee. I go “excuse me, where do I find pita chips?” She takes me to where they are, and I tell her I like the ones with sea salt. I get a bag, and I start talking about my recipes with pita chips, but she seemed preoccupied with getting back to work so I let her go.

40. Elevator in my apartment. She needed help in getting something inside the door, so I help her. “You moving in here?” “No, it’s just something new bla bla (I didn’t understand)” “Oh cool. When did you move here?” “We moved last December” Then she gets off at her floor before I could say anything. I noted she said “we” instead of “I” so she must be taken and living with her guy.

41. Coffee shop. Got my coffee, and opened a girl sitting at the bar with a nice looking tablet. I asked her if it was a good tablet, and did some elderly chat about that. Segued into what she’s working on, and what school she goes to… I told her that I tutor at her school (not true, but it will be eventually haha), but she wasn’t taking any of my bait.

Today’s takeaways:
- I’m still struggling to get past the elderly chat to more personal talk.
- I’m still talking myself out of approaching especially with moving targets.
- I feel that my lack of success as of late is starting to expose some of my limiting beliefs that I thought I had taken care of, but are more deeply rooted than I thought.
- I also think that my expectations are too high. I do remember reading Roosh’s Day Bang and he said for the first 100 approaches, you might get one number if you’re lucky. So maybe I’m really doing ok, I just have to practice and learn, and keep at it.

EDIT:
42. Got another one in before leaving the coffee shop. Got eye contact and a smile, and approached as I was leaving. Mind goes blank, and all I could muster was "hey it's a nice day!" Ughh, terrible opener. But she could not understand me, so I changed tacks and asked where she got her bag. Still could not understand me. Repeated myself, and she STILL could not understand me. So I ejected. That was probably the worst one since I started this year.

Just how it is... with my deaf accent, while many people can still understand me, and there are always some people who just cannot understand me to save their lives - not much I can really do about it. Also, next time I get eye contact and a smile, I probably should go direct and say "Hey, I saw you over here and I wanted to say hi! What's your name?" or something like that.

I've used the following with some success. It's better if you get some good eye contact first. Here it is:

You. Excuse me?
Her. Yes?
at this point, I have a way of, in a friendly way, smiling and saying "how are you?" which usually works pretty good. They'll say: Good...and usually return the friendly look but also with an inquisitive look on their face. You can either do this or just go straight to:
You: I know this sounds a little random, but I thought you looked nice today and wanted to say hello.
Her. Oh thank you.
You. I'm robreke ( extend your hand)
Her. her name
You. Nice to meet you (her name)
she'll probably say the same.
You. So, what are you up to today?
she will usually tell you and you can agree and amplify from there. The disinterested ones will of course excuse themselves, but I've found for even MARRIED women or girls with boyfriends....they'll at least engage in polite banter.