I'm going to start leaving my audio recorder on every time I bring a girl back home. I recently heard about 1 guy I use to hang out with getting arrested for a false rape allegation. They busted through his door, cuffed him and took him to the nearest police station. When police realised the allegation was completely false, they let him go. When I heard about this I called him and I urged him to report the bitch to the police but he wasn't bothered despite the fact that sexual assault arrests can stay on your record for some time, even if no conviction is made.

@Moma

That is a very complicated question, and if any of you reading this have that issue call a local criminal defense attorney immediately. The laws vary state to state and each jurisdiction is different.

Without getting in too deep, having evidence in your favor is better than not having it.

WIA

As a black man, it is best to avoid these cases whenever possible.

The case I was talking about earlier, the dude was married. Cops picked him up and he had to spend the night in jail, try explaining that to your wife.

I know a guy who uses a videotape for all his encounters, so no harm in having double protection. (get the pun!)

(04-05-2016 04:55 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  @Moma

That is a very complicated question, and if any of you reading this have that issue call a local criminal defense attorney immediately. The laws vary state to state and each jurisdiction is different.

Without getting in too deep, having evidence in your favor is better than not having it.

WIA

Correct, however you can figure this out on your own. I am an atty by trade and strongly advise we ALL take whatever steps necessary, under the law, to protect your best interest when encountering sketchy individuals. It appears there are eleven (11) states remaining with "two-party" consent laws still in place. Those include:

Quote:California, Connecticut, Florida, Illinois, Maryland, Massachusetts, Montana, New Hampshire, Pennsylvania and Washington. (Notes: (1) Illinois' two-party consent statute was held unconstitutional in 2014; (2) Hawai'i is in general a one-party state, but requires two-party consent if the recording device is installed in a private place; (3) Massachusetts bans "secret" recordings rather than requiring explicit consent from all parties.).

Source

I recently had a Tinder date with a mixed Dutch girl (Surinamese and Dutch background) that led to an interesting but controversial topic. She was extremely pro-black, to the extent that she thinks it is wrong for black people to date outside the race and that our goal should be to further populate the black nation. I of course disagree because I find it hard to consider any other race to be unattractive because they aren't black. I'm that weird guy that finds that a woman of any color/ethnicity can be attractive, I'm quite open minded. So I cannot contemplate limiting myself to only black women, especially living in the Netherlands where I don't come across that many. I even mentioned to her that the best looking, cream of the crop black women are not on Tinder here because they are frequently sought after regardless; they do not need online dating apps (which I think offended her since she was on Tinder).

What do you gents think about that? From what I gather on this thread and the Black American 'travel' thread, we mostly think alike in the fact that we are open to dating women of most ethnic backgrounds. Especially living in countries where black people are the minority. If I only dated black women, I would not be getting laid here. In the year and a half I've been in the Netherlands I have only been on 2 dates with black women. Not because a lack of effort, but a lack of contact with other black people.

Hey guys, my understanding is that a video can be removed from youtube if it's flagged as violating copyright laws.

Using a tune that's sold on itunes, amazon or anywhere is technically illegal in the U.S.

I use creative commons free to use music in my podcast which is shittier but legal.

I also use Audacity to blend the songs in. It's pretty simple to learn but requires some technical knowledge.

Happy to help edit music into your podcasts if you like.

Love the podcast by the way. You guys have a lot of wisdom and experience.. and it was great to hear from TK.

Fury, this is going to sound controversial and I welcome input on it but I've found that in my encounters with mixed peeps (black parent combined with white parent), the offspring are usually very adamant on certain beliefs specifically regarding 'racial purity'. Although I've had multiple experiences in friendships, conversations and sexing lizards who are either mixed or light skinned to the point that they blatantly had a white granny or grandad.

Specific example: I used to pipe a mixed lizard who had a white dad (Brit) and black mum and she used to be very stern against mixing. I found it a tad baffling since her dad was white and clearly in her life. I think that the reason for these beliefs being more purist in mixed people is that a lot of social issues involved in the West between black and white are obscured, simplified or ignored by the two 'polar opposites' who have children together. They believe that the lust/love that they share will wash over all social issues. I used to poke a white lizard in Toronto that I don't believe had ever been with a white guy. Her daughter was mixed. Despite her single minded pursuit of black love, her views on race were unbelievably childish to me and I thought rather detrimental considering the fact that she was raising a mixed child. I know these childish beliefs are detrimental because I've seen mixed friends in the UK lash out in frustration once realising that their parents sold them a kumbaya kinder egg surprise about how the world is. The frustration was from the reality that in the real world, they don't get to choose who they want to be. Western society has defined who they are. There is a silly notion that they circulate in the UK and I heard it in Toronto as well (another multicultural metropolis) that states that racism will be eliminated in the next 20 years since 'everyone will be beige'.

'We will soon be beige' is a simplification of the societal issues involving race and absolutely false since Brazil has been 'beige' for much longer than the UK yet experience blatant separatism in their society that is far worse than the UK. It is actually on par with certain parts of the U.S. This shows that biological integration (black men sexing up white lizards or white men sexing up black lizards) has no bearing on social issues involving race and understanding.

Delete

(04-07-2016 02:09 AM)h3ltrsk3ltr Wrote:  Hey guys, my understanding is that a video can be removed from youtube if it's flagged as violating copyright laws.

Using a tune that's sold on itunes, amazon or anywhere is technically illegal in the U.S.

I use creative commons free to use music in my podcast which is shittier but legal.

I also use Audacity to blend the songs in. It's pretty simple to learn but requires some technical knowledge.

Happy to help edit music into your podcasts if you like.

Love the podcast by the way. You guys have a lot of wisdom and experience.. and it was great to hear from TK.

What about using a mix by local DJs? I know some local DJs who have a few mixes that I can weave into the background of the pods. So far, I am only meeting Naija ones but I should buck up on some West Indian ones going forth to lend some variety to the sounds in the pod.

Thanks for the support, bruv.

Local music is great, I'd grab permission from the artist if you want to be legal.

I remember once you had an indie rapper on the show which is something I'd love to have on mine; adds serious dimension to your discussion.

I'm having a hard time finding red pill music and artists for my intro. If we could find a way to get a website for red pill musicians it'd be sick. That combined with the kingswiki would expand the shit out of our culture.

(04-07-2016 02:29 AM)Moma Wrote:  Fury, this is going to sound controversial and I welcome input on it but I've found that in my encounters with mixed peeps (black parent combined with white parent), the offspring are usually very adamant on certain beliefs specifically regarding 'racial purity'. Although I've had multiple experiences in friendships, conversations and sexing lizards who are either mixed or light skinned to the point that they blatantly had a white granny or grandad.

Specific example: I used to pipe a mixed lizard who had a white dad (Brit) and black mum and she used to be very stern against mixing. I found it a tad baffling since her dad was white and clearly in her life. I think that the reason for these beliefs being more purist in mixed people is that a lot of social issues involved in the West between black and white are obscured, simplified or ignored by the two 'polar opposites' who have children together. They believe that the lust/love that they share will wash over all social issues. I used to poke a white lizard in Toronto that I don't believe had ever been with a white guy. Her daughter was mixed. Despite her single minded pursuit of black love, her views on race were unbelievably childish to me and I thought rather detrimental considering the fact that she was raising a mixed child. I know these childish beliefs are detrimental because I've seen mixed friends in the UK lash out in frustration once realising that their parents sold them a kumbaya kinder egg surprise about how the world is. The frustration was from the reality that in the real world, they don't get to choose who they want to be. Western society has defined who they are. There is a silly notion that they circulate in the UK and I heard it in Toronto as well (another multicultural metropolis) that states that racism will be eliminated in the next 20 years since 'everyone will be beige'.

'We will soon be beige' is a simplification of the societal issues involving race and absolutely false since Brazil has been 'beige' for much longer than the UK yet experience blatant separatism in their society that is far worse than the UK. It is actually on par with certain parts of the U.S. This shows that biological integration (black men sexing up white lizards or white men sexing up black lizards) has no bearing on social issues involving race and understanding.

Yo Mo, what were her views?

I've been around those types my entire life.
Very few walk the walk, and they usually are not well read or well traveled. Even the ones with African American studies degrees don't often get it. They either only focus on America, or they romanticize the diaspora.

It's sad really. They build this identity around themselves and cling to it so fiercely.

I find that the black chicks that hate black guys who date out, are the first ones to be down with the swirl.

But to say they have issues would imply that the others do not.

Bougie chicks
Lauryn Hill types
Ratchets
Mixed chicks
Latinas who obviously have African genes but consider themselves French, Spanish, Italian..anything but black

Stick your dick in, and suddenly she starts to change her tune and see the light.

Same thing applies to "racist" white girls. (Asians, middle easterners, Indians)

Race matters, but dating is not really a battle ground. Plenty of black babies are being born every day. (And not enough qualified care for them)

WIA

Personally, having married and had children by someone outside my race, now divorced, I basically learned my lesson. Though everyone's experience is different, my second time around, I would choose to settle down with someone that shared similar cultural experiences as me. Of course, I find myself physically attracted to ALL varieties of women, however, when it comes to building a life together, that's another story.
I would not enjoy being surrounded by 'majorities' all day during work, then coming home to another one. In my experiences, the differences created far more problems than they solved.

^ Did you marry a white American woman?

(04-07-2016 05:12 PM)Travesty Wrote:  ^ Did you marry a white American woman?

No, she was Hispanic, but basically raised in and around white communities.

What was the conflict exactly?

Was it that other people disapproved of your marriage? Or was it that she couldn't understand your experience for cultural reasons (and vice versa)? Or was it something else?

I'm interested because I'm dating a non black non American woman. Race and cultural issues between us have not been a problem this far and no one has criticized my relationship yet. But it would be good to know what possible problems would be.

(04-08-2016 06:15 AM)therealpoder Wrote:  What was the conflict exactly?

Was it that other people disapproved of your marriage? Or was it that she couldn't understand your experience for cultural reasons (and vice versa)? Or was it something else?

I'm interested because I'm dating a non black non American woman. Race and cultural issues between us have not been a problem this far and no one has criticized my relationship yet. But it would be good to know what possible problems would be.

Just subtle differences in how we were raised and the expectations we had about raising our own children. She believed we truly lived in a colorblind society and should teach our children that, whereas I felt I needed to teach my black boys the realities of the world we live in.

If I felt I experienced racism in the workplace, or by police and tried to discuss it with her, she just couldn't see it and assumed I was wrong or overreacting. She's a good hearted woman, and we're still good friends, but we're on two different plains when it comes to issues that affect my community.

@Dime

Looking back, did you see the signs?

WIA

(04-08-2016 12:27 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  @Dime

Looking back, did you see the signs?

WIA

I'm sure there were, but I was young and in love with a beautiful exotic women and felt love could overcome and conquer anything. As I got wiser, my priorities and what I valued changed. Man, I just turned 40, life is too short to take anymore shorts.

(04-08-2016 11:41 AM)DimeBait Wrote:  

(04-08-2016 06:15 AM)therealpoder Wrote:  What was the conflict exactly?

Was it that other people disapproved of your marriage? Or was it that she couldn't understand your experience for cultural reasons (and vice versa)? Or was it something else?

I'm interested because I'm dating a non black non American woman. Race and cultural issues between us have not been a problem this far and no one has criticized my relationship yet. But it would be good to know what possible problems would be.

Just subtle differences in how we were raised and the expectations we had about raising our own children. She believed we truly lived in a colorblind society and should teach our children that, whereas I felt I needed to teach my black boys the realities of the world we live in.

If I felt I experienced racism in the workplace, or by police and tried to discuss it with her, she just couldn't see it and assumed I was wrong or overreacting. She's a good hearted woman, and we're still good friends, but we're on two different plains when it comes to issues that affect my community.

It would be easier to focus on only dating black women if I was back in the states (Atlanta has some fine ones) but I'm in Western Europe. There really aren't that many black women here, and the ones I do meet are so different from me. That's another thing I was explaining to that pro-Black girl on the date; even though we share the same skin color and ancestral background, I don't have a lot in common with the European blacks that I meet. Especially since most of the European blacks I meet are either directly from Africa or the Caribbean. Even with my Caribbean roots, I still don't have a lot in common with the Surinamese and Curacao people I meet here in the Netherlands.

I believe this was an issue discussed earlier in this thread, the discourse of diminishing black identity/heritage for individuals raised in North America. I don't read pro-Black/African literature, nor have I done any research in the academic fields. I guess I never felt the need as I have a strong American identity and never felt overly marginalized growing up in the states. Am I correct in positing that this constitutes a major reason for the pro-Black movement?

To be honest, if I overlook all the women saying "I don't date black men", I had it pretty decent in the states. Even when I lived in racist Georgia, the most hate and discrimination I faced actually came from other black people and not whites (I am very dark skinned so I was tormented about it in school -this was back during the light skinned era-). Pro-Black is cool and I respect it but black people have treated me much worse than whites ever have.

Needless to say, I'm black and proud and would not change that for a thing; however, I don't really give it further thought beyond that. So this idea of only making black babies in an effort to further the nation or only dating black women because of certain mindsets isn't my thing. If I think a woman is attractive and I can stand being around her, I'm going to stick my dick in her.

You may not have alot in common with the European blacks, but I can assure you that you have less in common with the European whites. Moma and myself grew up in Europe and we know the culture all too well. Those countries are great to visit but offer different challenges when you live there.

You have a strong American identity! What does that mean?

I understand at the end of the day, we marry or settle down with a woman that makes us happy. The problem is life isn't that simple, is it.

Moma has highlighted the problems that mixed race kids face when it comes to their identity.
What about the non - white person you settle down with! In my experience I haven't met many who could relate or handle the pressures that black men deal with on a regular basis. I know of five guys who passed away recently, they didn't make it to 50. Not to get melodramatic, but most of them died of stress related diseases.

Sure when you are young, life is great and you don't think about the future. As you get older you look past the nice ass and the pretty smile.

This week I had to go to court to help a friend out. I was waiting around and this mixed race girl came at sat in front of me with her black mum. We got engaged in a conversation, turns out the mum is from the Caribbean like my folks. We talked about the great food and she explained how she loves to cook. The daughter who was cute, kept raving about her mother's cooking. I looked at the mum and asked her did she teach her daughter to cook. All I heard was pure excuses and I bascially tuned out.

I am particular with my food, a woman that can cook what I like is a major plus in my books. A woman that is nurturing is a huge bonus as well. I want a woman that will feel comfortable around my family and my culture.

(04-08-2016 03:36 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:   I want a woman that will feel comfortable around my family and my culture.

This is basically what it boiled down to for me. I want to take my woman to the cook-out and not have to explain or translate to her what my friends and family are talking about, lol.
Rudebwoy is right, it's extremely challenging being a black man in the world we live in today. However, there are only so many women who can understand and respect that.

I get what Fury is saying and I can respect that. I'm a strong advocate of sticking my dick into whatever women I find attractive, however I'm purely referring to who I feel comfortable being with long-term, and building a life with.

Fury, I agree with you on the reluctance or defiance towards being 'forced' or obliged to copulate with a lizard just because she happens to share your skin hue. I did go through that in the UK at some point and became annoyed with the crop I was harvesting since I was getting a lot of hood lizards (estate chicks) due to where I lived but reluctant to play that ghetto role to keep them piqued and wet. I wandered off into other fields but I didn't feel satiated during my time away. However, when it comes to family building and as the most likely logical parent (the man!), one owes it to their child to put them in an optimal situation. With game, the illusion of love isn't so blinding and now we are to some degree, able to select a partner that will teach your child the same values you uphold including cultural and understanding of the placeholder that the Western society will place you in. I'm not saying to be obsessed and consumed by the 'limitations' of colour but it's as foolish to overlook the reality of what is going on. Regardless of what non black race you have your child with, as a black man, your child will look more like the offspring of a black than whichever race she is. This means, your child will go through the same struggles you do. One cannot kumbaya through this reality. At the end of the day, it's still your choice as to who you procreate with but these realities are relevant to pay into consideration.

Funny thing is, I was speaking to one of my mixed race spars in the UK yesterday. I've known this guy for a minute and spoke to him for an hour on the phone just covering various issues. He is also has an unusually high IQ and he completed GCSEs at a premature age so he will definitely chop me up if I came at him on some bullshyt that wasn't through through.
I spoke to him about the struggles he has gone through in UK society which is the most liberal country in Europe when it comes to being a non white person (in my opinion). I explained the root to some of the frustrations that he has had going through society as a teen and a young man in terms of identity and he listened attentively to what I said.

Again, I illustrated that his parents had not imparted the truth of the life he would live on him in his growing years and he was forced to, as many mixed peeps do, to wing it in society when it comes to where they fit in regards to race and figure stuff out. He had no disagreements with my soliloquy.

(04-08-2016 03:36 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  You may not have alot in common with the European blacks, but I can assure you that you have less in common with the European whites. Moma and myself grew up in Europe and we know the culture all too well. Those countries are great to visit but offer different challenges when you live there.

You have a strong American identity! What does that mean?

I understand at the end of the day, we marry or settle down with a woman that makes us happy. The problem is life isn't that simple, is it.

Moma has highlighted the problems that mixed race kids face when it comes to their identity.
What about the non - white person you settle down with! In my experience I haven't met many who could relate or handle the pressures that black men deal with on a regular basis. I know of five guys who passed away recently, they didn't make it to 50. Not to get melodramatic, but most of them died of stress related diseases.

Sure when you are young, life is great and you don't think about the future. As you get older you look past the nice ass and the pretty smile.

This week I had to go to court to help a friend out. I was waiting around and this mixed race girl came at sat in front of me with her black mum. We got engaged in a conversation, turns out the mum is from the Caribbean like my folks. We talked about the great food and she explained how she loves to cook. The daughter who was cute, kept raving about her mother's cooking. I looked at the mum and asked her did she teach her daughter to cook. All I heard was pure excuses and I bascially tuned out.

I am particular with my food, a woman that can cook what I like is a major plus in my books. A woman that is nurturing is a huge bonus as well. I want a woman that will feel comfortable around my family and my culture.

What I mean by that is that I usually think of my American identity first, before my black identity. Then again, what is black identity? As for commonalities with Black or white Europeans, you would be surprised that I actually do have more in common with the white people I have met. I think that is due to my American identity, as the western values synonymous with America are close to those of Western Europe. I live in the Netherlands so the Black people I meet here are usually of Caribbean or African descent and hold true to those values. To be honest, we don't have much in common whenever we do speak. I like to travel, I'm adventurous (I do crazy shit like skydiving, bungee jumping, para-motoring), nerdy, etc. Not to say that they wouldn't do those things, but it isn't very common to meet people like that.

Even with my Caribbean background, I can't relate very well. Whenever I go to my barbershop here in the Netherlands, it is the closest I feel to home. It's your typical black barbershop except all the guys in there are Caribbean. So the usual animated conversations and debates we are used to in barbershops, black music, etc. One day they were playing music from the Caribbean and my barber was asking if I knew any of it, I had no clue. He was even shocked that I didn't know any of the songs or artists. However, when they would play any American rap or hip hop, I would know the songs and artists while most of them knew very little on the subject.

(04-08-2016 04:02 PM)Moma Wrote:  However, when it comes to family building and as the most likely logical parent (the man!), one owes it to their child to put them in an optimal situation. With game, the illusion of love isn't so blinding and now we are to some degree, able to select a partner that will teach your child the same values you uphold including cultural and understanding of the placeholder that the Western society will place you in. I'm not saying to be obsessed and consumed by the 'limitations' of colour but it's as foolish to overlook the reality of what is going on. Regardless of what non black race you have your child with, as a black man, your child will look more like the offspring of a black than whichever race she is. This means, your child will go through the same struggles you do. One cannot kumbaya through this reality. At the end of the day, it's still your choice as to who you procreate with but these realities are relevant to pay into consideration.

Funny thing is, I was speaking to one of my mixed race spars in the UK yesterday. I've known this guy for a minute and spoke to him for an hour on the phone just covering various issues. He is also has an unusually high IQ and he completed GCSEs at a premature age so he will definitely chop me up if I came at him on some bullshyt that wasn't through through.
I spoke to him about the struggles he has gone through in UK society which is the most liberal country in Europe when it comes to being a non white person (in my opinion). I explained the root to some of the frustrations that he has had going through society as a teen and a young man in terms of identity and he listened attentively to what I said.

Again, I illustrated that his parents had not imparted the truth of the life he would live on him in his growing years and he was forced to, as many mixed peeps do, to wing it in society when it comes to where they fit in regards to race and figure stuff out. He had no disagreements with my soliloquy.

I think this is an intriguing subject and it was great to hear everyone's thoughts on this. I guess in the end, we will have to agree to disagree. I understand the points you gents made but they don't really have much bearing in my decision process when it comes to women. To be honest, with the values of today's women, I don't really see myself getting married anytime soon so I haven't given it too much thought. But I know myself, I am solitary and introverted; meaning I don't mind being alone. Therefore, if I were to marry a woman, I would have to be able to stand her presence on a daily basis; for me that would come from her personality meshing with mine, not her pigment.

Everyone is right in stating that there are key issues for blacks that only those within our community would understand. I think someone mentioned before that being a black man is probably one of the toughest things in today's society. I truly believe this, however, it is something I try not to give too much focus. We will always face racism from non-blacks, and in my case, even from other blacks (I was ridiculed so much about my dark skin from other blacks that at one point in my adolescence, I was determined to never have a dark skinned wife; just so I wouldn't have to subject my child to the same torment I endured). I'm not going to give it too much energy because it would take away from me enjoying the short time I have on this earth.

Although, I do understand everyone's points. It would be nice to be with someone else that understands the struggle, I can comprehend that. Plus you can better relate this sentiment to your progeny if both parents are on the same page.

Maybe my perspective is different because of experiences as a young child. I am from South Florida (a melting pot) and I also had a white European stepfather. I have always been surrounded by diversity and I welcome it completely.

As for my children, it doesn't matter if they have a black or non-black mother, they will still face racism and adversity; humans always have been and always will be assholes. That won't change, whether my child is dark chocolate or caramel.

(04-08-2016 03:54 PM)DimeBait Wrote:  

(04-08-2016 03:36 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:   I want a woman that will feel comfortable around my family and my culture.

This is basically what it boiled down to for me. I want to take my woman to the cook-out and not have to explain or translate to her what my friends and family are talking about, lol.

Unless I marry a 1st generation Jamaican from BK, I'll never have this.

WIA