Post: #1

Let's say you end up being invited to hang out in a group by one of the girls. None of the guys or girls is attached to each other. In fact, in my situation Friday night...of the two guys one was married, one girl was married, one girl was engaged and the other guy .....kind of a beta dick....was I don't even know.

I was out dolo....and hooked up with them.

They all worked together....but the engaged girl invited me to hang with them after I opened one guy in a bar about directions I needed.

They were cool....but after a bit....and going to some different venues....the guys were giving a vibe they'd rather not want me around...while at least one of the girls remained friendly. Though , they were guarding her a bit.

I bailed at the second venue and told them bye.

How to frame in these situations where the girls are okay with you hanging but the guys are stand offish...not too friendly. It tried to engage the guys...and they conversed a little....but it was quite sparingly...like they weren't interested in knowing me. I can understand the dynamic as they may feel threatened but what are some good ways to frame yourself/ give off the best vibe when hanging with mixed sets?

Post: #2

Tough situation.

Since feather boas and fuzzy hats are verboten nowadays, group theory is rarely discussed. And with the emphasis on online, most interactions tend to be one on one.

With the guys there may be commonalities, but most dudes will see you as the interloper that you are. She invited you to join the tribe, not them. She could also be a raging slut, and they have to deal with her shit all the time.

It's also an interesting dynamic in that she is the alpha of the group. That may be unsettling as well.

I'd suggest having the guys wing you to win them over, but a better move (sex wise) would have been to have the girl wing you (actively or as social proof), or pawn the whole group by merging sets.

Tbh, most group moves are above my pay grade. You really need to be a whip on those situations.

In my experience, going and remaining solo is best.

If you need a wing, person needs to understand the game.

You roll with a crew, most of the time its solo missions and then rejoin the group.

On the spot wings require that you can assess another man's game (and trustworthiness) quickly.

WIA

Post: #3

I've had the same occur where i've met or approached chicks in mixed groups. I always try to initiate the convo with the guys first in one of two ways.
1. I approach a girl in a set and a guy comes over to us inquiring: I usually say hey I was trying to speak with her, was there a problem? -- Usually most dudes will just back off stating no
2. I am talking with a girl and her friend(girls) and dudes are in close proximity: I say hey i'm coverdoc, extend my hand and began to interact with all of them while keeping my main focus on my target. Dudes seem to appreciate this more as they are not left out of the loop and can possibly use them as future instant wingmen.
For me it's all about maintaining a frame that let's them know you are not threatened or intimidated by other men, but at the same time you are friendly and just want to have a good time.

Post: #4

(12-07-2014 10:40 AM)robreke Wrote:  Let's say you end up being invited to hang out in a group by one of the girls. None of the guys or girls is attached to each other. In fact, in my situation Friday night...of the two guys one was married, one girl was married, one girl was engaged and the other guy .....kind of a beta dick....was I don't even know.

I was out dolo....and hooked up with them.

They all worked together....but the engaged girl invited me to hang with them after I opened one guy in a bar about directions I needed.

They were cool....but after a bit....and going to some different venues....the guys were giving a vibe they'd rather not want me around...while at least one of the girls remained friendly. Though , they were guarding her a bit.

I bailed at the second venue and told them bye.

How to frame in these situations where the girls are okay with you hanging but the guys are stand offish...not too friendly. It tried to engage the guys...and they conversed a little....but it was quite sparingly...like they weren't interested in knowing me. I can understand the dynamic as they may feel threatened but what are some good ways to frame yourself/ give off the best vibe when hanging with mixed sets?

In this situation I think you made it too obvious you were interested in the engaged girl and this put everyone on the defense. She was engaged and with friends, no way did you have the possibility of hooking up with her.

These are tough situations and usually the only way to hang is be a good storyteller without being overbearing and do what groups like this do: share your experiences with vacations, travels you did with exgfs, talk about work, etc. That's how you build rapport in a situation like this.

Post: #5

In situations like that you almost need to put more focus on disarming the dudes imo. Get them answering questions and find a way to connect.

With group sets you need to bring more value than just being the guy who is trying to bang their friend, unless you know you are going to bang her. In that case just put in the minimal amount of effort.

An easy way to add value is to get the group to bounce with you to a cool place you have an in at.

Post: #6

Use social pressure to your advantage.

Be cool and friendly with everyone in the group. engage people in the conversation. come up with topics. become part of the group.

guys who get threatened and want you to leave lose their cool and start acting weird. address it.

say it LOUD so that everyone can hear you "hey what's going on man are you ok?". that should put him in his place a bit.

if he persists address it again and put more social pressure on him. tell him something like "look I'm cool with everyone here what's your problem?" and ask everyone else "hey guys i can leave if you all want me out just tell me". if they say you should stay them they are on your side now and he looks like a tool.

you can also ask few people next to you about him and roll your eyes showing how weird he is. people will get it and agree with you.

from this moment everything he tries to outgame you will be framed as weird tryhard and looked down on.

basically befriend the group especially fatties and mother hens and use everything you can against him by being more cool and charming. never confront him aggressively