Post: #2251

(10-15-2018 10:02 AM)godfather dust Wrote:  I'll say December 25th, it was earlier but didn't drink Christmas or New year's.

Thank you. Welcome aboard as of December 25, 2017 and I hope to hear more from you in this thread over time.

Post: #2252

This past summer I was sober for one month.

I just graduated college and this was the longest I had been sober in probably 6 -7 years. No weed, adderall, alcohol, or any mind altering substance (besides caffeine).

It was great, my life had an aspect of clarity that had been missing for the better part of a decade. Fell off the wagon after 30 days when I attended a bachelor party.

I binged for 3 nights and by the end I was so worn out that on the last night I passed out from exhaustion at the bar. I was extremely tired and just put my head down at a table and slept.

For the past 10 weeks I have mostly been a moderate drinker. I got drunk on my birthday, sisters wedding, and a few weeks ago during a football game. I decided to go sober for another month 2 weeks ago.

This time around I will be attempting 2 months of sobriety.

I remember during that first month thinking how amazing it would be to not drink for a year and how sharp my mind could become.

I'd like to try for a year, but I recently made plans to spend New Years with some friends in NYC. Cant really imagine doing so without a bottle of poison at the ready.

Post: #2253

Long time lurker (actually it has just taken me a long time to read this entire thread), first time poster.
I will go into more detail as the year rolls on. I had my last intoxication/inebriation on October 19th 2018, and wish to join the wagon for a year.

Post: #2254

(10-22-2018 04:20 PM)Redbaron Wrote:  I'd like to try for a year, but I recently made plans to spend New Years with some friends in NYC. Cant really imagine doing so without a bottle of poison at the ready.

Yeah, well.....that's the real challenge isn't it?

Birthdays, weddings, New Year's, Halloween, office parties.....going in to each and every one of those settings and saying "I'm not drinking."

There's always an excuse to drink. A "drinking event" comes up every week or two. Taking a stand and deciding NOT to even have a sip, especially at these events...that's the true test of your commitment and a great test of your character.

I just passed my three and a half year mark. I've attended countless parties, family get-togethers, holidays, Friday night shitface sessions with the boys....I watched as the people around me imbibed and I refused a drop.

It was NOT easy. Not at all. I've been tempted. But in the end, I'm so proud of myself for resisting. I'm not proud of myself for a lot of things, but I am proud of that.

Don't give yourself the excuse, the "permission." Make a commitment and stick to it, even if it means being bored while other people are having "fun."

(In time you see exactly how vacuous and repetitive that "fun" is, too.)

It's all up to you man. NYC is a hell of a city. I had a blast last time I was there drinking nothing stronger than soda water. You can too if you want. You'll be in an amazing city with friends ushering in a brand new year full of possibilities.

Imagine seeing that year in completely sober, and staying that way for a year. I hope you at least consider it.

Post: #2255

On 23 October 2018, it has been a completely sober year for me.

It was an eye-opening experience given that I never had a break longer than 1 month since the age of 15/16.

First of all, I empirically experienced alcohol is not absolutely necessary to enjoy nightlife social interactions, celebrations, and finally getting laid.

Secondly, I managed to achieve main two goals, 1) finally finished my thesis and consequently got my degree (which is worthless btw, but still perceiving it as a sort of achievement as it was a prerequisite for the 2nd goal) 2) quit a mundane job in a boring town full of uninspiring people and moved to a cosmopolitan city where I got a technology sales job in a growing field with way better career prospects. I also managed to reach my secondary goals regarding self-development like improving my fitness, read plenty of books gaining applicable wisdom, learning languages, tracking my habits, better planning my task&errands, sticking to doing what I planned to do etc.

Thirdly, I do notice the health & financial benefits of not drinking. Sleep is usually deeper, skin looks cleaner. I was hard for me to imagine wasting the whole day on curing the sufferings of the hangover, especially during the heat of the summer days. I did realize that loads of people’s lives simply revolve around 5 days of working the job they don’t like/hate, getting wasted on the weekends with their peers (who are in the same situation), and then passing their weekends by eating junk food and watching YT/Netflix, floating around this never-ending meaningless lifestyle. Not to mention spending a substantial amount of their incomes on those binges. It is particularly sad to see corporate women in their late 20s and 30s pursuing this lifestyle.

Having said the benefits of sobriety I experienced I must admit it did not turn out to be the miraculous remedy for the shortcomings of my personality. While having achieved a couple of goals I still struggle with overcoming my inner laziness. Despite having learned a lot on the topic of making money online I haven’t taken any steps to actually make it happen. Honestly, there are several factors which are all my fault:

- My own lack of conscientiousness
- Prioritizing the easy tasks and busy work over real effort
- Feeling too tired after my day job at times on the weekdays
- Prioritizing hanging out in the city, spending time outside, and pursuing hobbies on the weekends
- Lack of focus&concentration, ease of distraction
- A bit of neuroticism, self-doubt in whether ‘it all makes sense’
- A bit too much of travelling

I’m in my mid 20s, still having to share the flat in the city I live. This makes me absolutely aware of the fact that I need to focus on building another source of income as soon as possible if I don’t want to end up as a corporate wage slave until the rest of my life, example of which I often see at people older than me living paycheck to paycheck, having to share flat and spending money on frivolities. In conclusion, sobriety was not harmful for me regarding this aspect of my life but it did helped too much either. I have also been a bit lazy when it comes to game. While doing a bit better than an average guy, I was usually satisfied with low hanging fruit and not really putting too much effort in getting more bangs, relationships. Plus, it is one of the most difficult regions in the world.

On the other hand, while I realized that it is not obligatory to drink to have a social life, I do realize it works as a important social lubricant. Sometimes I could not make a desirable connection with the people I was with. Going out to clubs sober usually felt to me like a going to the full time job I have to do. Having to survive the shitty, loud music disturbing the conversations, listening to the girls’ boring, mundane life stories, their lack of flirting abilities, dealing with general nightlife bullshit was a pain in the ass indeed.

I do appreciate what I achieved from this year but I decided not to continue the wagon for the next year. Alcohol is not a necessity anymore, and I think I can control my drinking better after the sobriety. Limiting myself to a couple of drinks at night/ couple of glasses of wine during dinner will be easy as I hate the thought of having a hangover. However, if I notice it being problematic again I will stop my drinking immediately.

Thank you all for the feedback in thread, it meant a lot to me. I wish all of you a successful wagon.

Post: #2256

(10-25-2018 07:49 AM)BigTedSven Wrote:  Long time lurker (actually it has just taken me a long time to read this entire thread), first time poster.
I will go into more detail as the year rolls on. I had my last intoxication/inebriation on October 19th 2018, and wish to join the wagon for a year.

BigTedSven, thank you for this post. It always means a great deal to me when someone's first post is in this thread, and all the more so when the post is to say that you've lurked to read this entire thread and are declaring a 1 year wagon. Posts like this are the lifeblood of the wagon thread.

Welcome aboard as of October 19, 2018 and I look forward to hearing more from you here as time goes on.

Post: #2257

(10-28-2018 08:01 AM)Merengues Wrote:  On 23 October 2018, it has been a completely sober year for me.

.....

Thank you all for the feedback in thread, it meant a lot to me. I wish all of you a successful wagon.

Merengues, congrats on completing the 1 year wagon. It's a real achievement and I'm glad you took a little time to reflect on it. +1 rep point from me.

You will learn a lot about your real relation to drinking in the coming months. I hope it goes well and you are able to enjoy it in moderation. But in any case, having gone through this year will serve you well in the future and I think that in time you will look back on it with surprising fondness and affection.

Post: #2258

I’m in as of today, 4th of November. Been lurking here since February, have gone through the thread multiple times, and now is the time to actually get on the wagon myself. I'm posting it here for accountability. I don’t drink daily, but when I drink, I drink too much. Hangovers usually take multiple days and besides feeling sick, I also sense this slightly depressed and insecure feeling. I’m in my late 20s and think that my drinking is not as fun anymore as it was when I started drinking beer some five years ago. Having started a new job recently I believe drinking is holding me back and I am not able to be the best version of myself.
I came across a quote that, in my opinion, resembles the idea of a one year wagon: “The years teach us much the days never knew” (Ralph Waldo Emerson). I’m excited to see what this year will bring.

Post: #2259

(11-04-2018 04:01 AM)Flavio Wrote:  I’m in as of today, 4th of November. Been lurking here since February, have gone through the thread multiple times, and now is the time to actually get on the wagon myself. I'm posting it here for accountability. I don’t drink daily, but when I drink, I drink too much. Hangovers usually take multiple days and besides feeling sick, I also sense this slightly depressed and insecure feeling. I’m in my late 20s and think that my drinking is not as fun anymore as it was when I started drinking beer some five years ago. Having started a new job recently I believe drinking is holding me back and I am not able to be the best version of myself.
I came across a quote that, in my opinion, resembles the idea of a one year wagon: “The years teach us much the days never knew” (Ralph Waldo Emerson). I’m excited to see what this year will bring.

Flavio, thank you for this great post. Honored and delighted to see yet another poster who has read through the entire wagon thread and whose first forum post is in this thread declaring a 1 year wagon.

I think that you are starting your wagon at exactly the right time of life -- for hard drinkers the late 20s are very often the precise period when the best that drinking has had to offer is behind them, and the pure joy and abandon that would characterize it even a few years earlier become troubled and subtly but profoundly lessened. At the same time, the physical toll of drinking becomes more noticeable and gives those first slight hints of depression and aging that would grow steadily more pronounced and finally florid if one were to keep drinking hard through one's 30s or -- dreadfully -- 40s and 50s. This is the right moment to step away, take a full year off, and allow one's relation to drinking and to all the structures of habit and emotion in its ambit to change over the course of those long and indelible weeks, months, and seasons.

Speaking of which -- I'm indebted to you for citing that Emerson quote. Strangely enough I've never seen it before, and though I'm in general no great fan of either aphorisms or of Emerson himself, it is indeed a beautifully concise formulation of an idea that I've harped on repeatedly in this thread. That you brought it to bear so rightly here shows that you've read this thread with serious attention and purpose, and I thank you again for that as well.

Welcome aboard as of November 4, 2018 and I look forward to hearing more from you in this thread as time goes on.

Post: #2260

Yeah dudes thats it for me.Its become a depressant for me.
I did some hard drinking when I was in the Outback at the start of the year.Ive drank once in the last 7 months..I ended up vomiting 3 times on the cab ride home.Then being too sick to liift.My head was fucked in a major way.

I don't drink wine or beer just spirits.Add to that barstaff like me so I end up drinking for free alot..
I love bars so this is hard for me.
Up side was weight lose and good lifting results.Also my sleep is better.
It's weird how everyone wants to talk me into drinking.

The bad side is I have only been out twice at night.I figure though I need this time to get over drinking and retooling myself for sober game.I got my vibe back a vibe I thought I could only get while drinking.Ive been looking into state control and being high vibration
My meditation has gone through the roof...I just have to take up day game etc and start going out at night again ..
I spend less money now too .I use to buy so much shit when I was drinking and the next day.

My bloods have also been fantastic.T is good blood sugar is good.

I think I went over edge in the Outback with drinking that it affected me mentally and it took me down a dark road....plus I was getting droopy dick from it....

I aint beating myself up for drinking once as I needed to know how drinking fucked me up..Im glad it happened.

Also I see now I don't need it to get young birds

Post: #2261

Went out Friday and it continued until yesterday evening, drunk a crazy amount. Always been a massive binge drinker, but this had calmed down in my late twenties after meeting my now ex wife. Since the divorce I've been going out every couple of months, rarely asleep before midday the next day.

Can remember a few embarrassing incidents from the night and shown myself up to a few women via social media when I got home. Including a fling from 15 years ago who now has 2 kids and is married, but wants to come over and see me. Also my mid forties hair dresser. Also said some dumb things to a woman that works in the same company as me, nothing sexual, but not something you'd like to get out amongst colleagues. Closed down Facebook last night.

Love the release and confidence alcohol gives, but it's always only temporary and the fallout is causing more issues now so it has to stop. Was looking through an escorts directory as well, luckily didn't go ahead with ordering one over. I live in quiet road with mainly older people...

Feels like a whole new low was reached. The positive I'm taking is that I will use it as the catalyst to remove drinking from my life. Each night out since my divorce has become heavier and more debauched each time, I suspect next time I will be ordering escorts in, saying stuff to my ex wife etc.

Little consolation but the other slight positive was how receptive the women I contacted were when I started to escalating in a sexual way over messaging. Normally I too shy for my own good when it comes to approaching women.

I'm now fully onboard with this chaps.

Post: #2262

In my experience, alcohol gives a temporary confidence boost followed by horrible anxiety. It feels amazing during the first 5-6 drinks, then goes downhill pretty fast. Waking up after a night of drinking is a horrible feeling mentally, especially after a blackout.

Avoiding booze helps boost confidence in the long run. It can be uncomfortable at first in social situations, but it is worth it. People also respect someone that doesn't need booze to be confident.

Post: #2263

I went an entire year without drinking (9/16/17 to 9/16/18). It was an amazing year, but unfortunately I decided to drink on the one year anniversary. One drink turned into a two week bender of being absolutely hammered the entire time, and not remembering most of it.

It was pretty awful to be honest. I made some incredibly poor and destructive decisions, but in a way I'm glad that it happened. It taught me some important lessons, and now that some time has passed I can look back and laugh at how insane the whole situation was. It also led to me moving to a place where I'm much happier.

I will need to be on a lifelong wagon, but understand the importance of taking it year by year. I'm back on for a new year as of September 27, 2018.

Post: #2264

I notice that a big session normally follows a having a social pint a couple of weeks before. By then it's been a few months since the last drink and I've convinced myself I've got a handle on it and how there's nothing wrong with just a drink with mates every now and then.

I think this sows a seed on some level and I then manufacture a huge night a couple weeks later to finish the job off in style.

To me it now appears that the only way I can avoid this cycle is by stopping drinking entirely.

Post: #2265

(11-11-2018 05:02 PM)B80 Wrote:  I notice that a big session normally follows a having a social pint a couple of weeks before. By then it's been a few months since the last drink and I've convinced myself I've got a handle on it and how there's nothing wrong with just a drink with mates every now and then.

I think this sows a seed on some level and I then manufacture a huge night a couple weeks later to finish the job off in style.

To me it now appears that the only way I can avoid this cycle is by stopping drinking entirely.

Then do it. Pick a night to have your last drinks and post your starting date.

Post: #2266

Last drink was Saturday the 10th of November. Fully on-board with this.

Post: #2267

(11-13-2018 04:14 PM)B80 Wrote:  Last drink was Saturday the 10th of November. Fully on-board with this.

B80, thank you for this and for your earlier post. Increasingly out of control binge drinking of the kind you're describing -- especially in what I assume are your thirties, and after a divorce -- is bad news and you are putting a hard stop to it not one moment too soon. Calling various people from your life and work and doing other dumb and reputation-endangering things in the middle of a drunken binge can be excused on occasion in one's teens and early twenties, but the bye runs out very rapidly after that. To persist in this kind of behavior is to hurtle oneself down a particularly dreadful path, the path to loserdom. You should congratulate yourself for having made the decision to avoid that path before taking on losses that could be permanently damaging and difficult to reverse.

Welcome aboard as of November 10, 2018 and I look forward to hearing more from you here as time goes on.

Post: #2268

(11-11-2018 04:47 PM)TigOlBitties Wrote:  I went an entire year without drinking (9/16/17 to 9/16/18). It was an amazing year, but unfortunately I decided to drink on the one year anniversary. One drink turned into a two week bender of being absolutely hammered the entire time, and not remembering most of it.

It was pretty awful to be honest. I made some incredibly poor and destructive decisions, but in a way I'm glad that it happened. It taught me some important lessons, and now that some time has passed I can look back and laugh at how insane the whole situation was. It also led to me moving to a place where I'm much happier.

I will need to be on a lifelong wagon, but understand the importance of taking it year by year. I'm back on for a new year as of September 27, 2018.

TigOlBitties, thanks for the post. Even though you did not make a good decision in its immediate aftermath, congrats for completing the 1 year wagon, and +1 rep point from me. It is a real achievement and it will make you stronger as you start your new wagon -- and most importantly, your experience will allow you to make a better decision when you reevaluate the next time around.

Welcome aboard as of September 27, 2018 and I hope to hear more from you in this thread over time.

Post: #2269

I hopped on the Wagon October 15 at 00:00!

Quite a ride so far! Thanks for the invitation! I'm honored and humbled.

Post: #2270

I'm a lifetime non-drinker (at least 2 decades) & it's good to see members display a lot of persistence in each of their alcoholic abstinences. Keep up with the work, everyone.
_______________________________________________
" Can two walk together, except they be agreed?." #179

Post: #2271

Time for a quick update, hopefully this well help me through.
The drinking has been a complete non issue for me to pass up. Had 3 social occasions so far and have been utterly satisfied with soda water and lemon.
Unfortunately I had some food poisoning earlier this week, with stomach wrenching, and a pounding headache, adding up to not being able to sleep, all I could think of was that a nice joint would really fix me up and hopefully get some sleep. Luckily I flushed whatever I had left out upon starting the wagon.
Since the sickness the week has been a terrible slow experience getting back to health, but due to productivity being low, last night all I could think about was smoking a nice little joint and watching Christopher Nolan film.
I remembered that some of you were talking about getting a massage earlier in this thread, and that’s exactly what I did.
Still had the cravings this afternoon after work, however managed to kill them with a session in the gym, a weak instant coffee, and a sunset walk.
I know it’s bad to have coffee this late in the day, but there is much in the way of admin to catch up with due to what happened earlier in the week, and I plan on having an all nighter to complete it before the weekend starts.
I have been doing some thinking on what had caused my dependencies on drugs, as I clarify these thoughts I plan to share them in case other members can relate.

Post: #2272

I just completed my one year wagon. Sincere thanks and love to Lizard of Oz for starting this thread. The world is looking a little brighter than it was a year ago.

Post: #2273

Guys , as a teetotal (non alcohol drinker at all) I can only recommend you to have friends who don't drink. Go out with them and take a juice or a sparkling water.
Treat alcohol as evil and never take one at all . Be strong. This is a poison like all other drugs. A part of why my life is a relative success is because even at the worst moments i have never taken alcohol or done drugs and managed to get over every situation.

Same for having fun , going out , your hobbies etc , they must be alcohol-free if you want to be happy
I join Built to Fade , guys you re doing an extremely good work . But alcohol is not like a diet , you can eat no carbs for x time , but alcohol you should ban it for life.
I drink only when im offered a glass of wine or something like that for a birthday or christmas , and that s it

Post: #2274

(11-15-2018 11:27 AM)77market Wrote:  I hopped on the Wagon October 15 at 00:00!

Quite a ride so far! Thanks for the invitation! I'm honored and humbled.

77market, thanks for the post. Delighted to see yet another poster whose first forum post is in this thread -- it's becoming a real tradition.

Please confirm that you are in for a full year as of October 15, 2018 and I will officially welcome you on board.

Post: #2275

(11-23-2018 05:15 AM)Horus Wrote:  I just completed my one year wagon. Sincere thanks and love to Lizard of Oz for starting this thread. The world is looking a little brighter than it was a year ago.

Horus, congrats my man -- it's been a privilege to follow your posts here through the wagon year. I'll never forget the post when you knew you would see it all the way through this time. I also know it wasn't easy for you and you should take a long moment to look back and feel real pride in what you've accomplished. +1 rep point for me.

I hope you will strongly consider reupping for the deuce -- for those who had drunk hard enough for long enough, that second year is crucial in consolidating and building on what was achieved in the first one. If you do, please post here and it will be my honor to welcome you back on board.