Post: #2226

This wagon is a hell of a ride isn't it? At least it has been and is for me.

It's coming up to the 8.5 month point for me, and I'm truly grateful for every morning that I wake up with a clear head and the promise of a day to come. I'm grateful to Lizard of Oz for providing the tools for myself and others to make a profound change in our lives. And I'm grateful to the people who have shared their experiences in this thread - it's comforting at times to go back and reread what has been written here.

I'm finally at the stage where I've gained enough momentum to know with absolute certainty that I will make it to one year and there's nothing that can stop me - I'm not being complacent, but there has been a definite mind shift, away from facing each day as a battle of will power which needs to be conquered, towards embracing and enjoying the ride for what it is. I still have thoughts about drinking, and sometimes even strong urges. But while these urges used to be an obsession, they are now merely passing thoughts, free of compulsion or urgency, and never something that will preoccupy my brain for more than the time it takes to decide what to wear in the morning. For a long time, Lizard's advice to acknowledge these thoughts and just let them go was absolutely maddening advice for me. It all seemed like sensible advice and I tried to put it into action every time, but how the hell could I just let these thoughts go as easily as that? Does he not understand that I'm overwhelmed with these thoughts and there is too much to just push to the side? Easy for him to say perhaps. Well, the answer is that it's not easy, nor is it supposed to be easy. In fact that's the whole point. Because every time you face these thoughts and come out on top, it becomes fractionally easier the next time. Every success is like chipping away at a wall with a tiny chisel, and although it doesn't seem like you're making progress from day to day, the accumulation of these tiny successes over time is what strengthens your frame of mind and allows you to begin break free of the inevitably of acting on these thoughts. There are no shortcuts and it requires a lot of work. Even though I understood this advice nine months ago, only time allowed me to understand it. I'm still humble enough to know that I still need to be vigilent because this is all new to me and I suspect I'm only beginning to scratch the surface. But in a weird way, I actually welcome these thoughts and I enjoy the ease at which I set them aside until they return.

The thing about the wagon for someone who has spent so many years as a heavy drinker is that you are starkly confronted with all the aspects of your life that you have neglected. Of course there are the obvious things such as health and finances, and these are things which improve almost automatically. But then there are the deeper emotional issues, things that have accumulated and you have pushed to the side and not properly dealt with. And when these issues crawl their way to the surface in the clarity of sobriety, it can hit you like a ton of bricks. Years of anger, resentment, guilt and frustration that you didn't even know existed, that you suppressed with alcohol for so long, are suddenly hoisted upon you, and it's overwhelming. The one tool that you relied on in a subconscious and cowardly attempt to deal with these issues is now gone, and there is nothing left in the toolbox. It's like learning how to walk again, and at this stage I have no answers as to how to confront this. Unfortunately, dealing with this is not as simple as just acknowledging it and letting it go. But I'm grateful that I finally have the clarity of mind to at least acknowledge it and begin to look for answers. I suspect that it will be even more difficult and require more hard work than the wagon, but it is something which would have never been possible without the wagon itself.

Post: #2227

(08-05-2018 02:30 PM)Horus Wrote:  I'm finally at the stage where I've gained enough momentum to know with absolute certainty that I will make it to one year and there's nothing that can stop me - I'm not being complacent, but there has been a definite mind shift, away from facing each day as a battle of will power which needs to be conquered, towards embracing and enjoying the ride for what it is. I still have thoughts about drinking, and sometimes even strong urges. But while these urges used to be an obsession, they are now merely passing thoughts, free of compulsion or urgency, and never something that will preoccupy my brain for more than the time it takes to decide what to wear in the morning. For a long time, Lizard's advice to acknowledge these thoughts and just let them go was absolutely maddening advice for me. It all seemed like sensible advice and I tried to put it into action every time, but how the hell could I just let these thoughts go as easily as that? Does he not understand that I'm overwhelmed with these thoughts and there is too much to just push to the side? Easy for him to say perhaps. Well, the answer is that it's not easy, nor is it supposed to be easy. In fact that's the whole point. Because every time you face these thoughts and come out on top, it becomes fractionally easier the next time. Every success is like chipping away at a wall with a tiny chisel, and although it doesn't seem like you're making progress from day to day, the accumulation of these tiny successes over time is what strengthens your frame of mind and allows you to begin break free of the inevitably of acting on these thoughts. There are no shortcuts and it requires a lot of work. Even though I understood this advice nine months ago, only time allowed me to understand it. I'm still humble enough to know that I still need to be vigilent because this is all new to me and I suspect I'm only beginning to scratch the surface. But in a weird way, I actually welcome these thoughts and I enjoy the ease at which I set them aside until they return.

This is so honestly and beautifully stated that it leaves me speechless for once. But somewhere -- on earth in one case and in heaven in the other -- Aaron Beck and Albert Ellis, the great creators of CBT, are smiling.

(08-05-2018 02:30 PM)Horus Wrote:  The thing about the wagon for someone who has spent so many years as a heavy drinker is that you are starkly confronted with all the aspects of your life that you have neglected. Of course there are the obvious things such as health and finances, and these are things which improve almost automatically. But then there are the deeper emotional issues, things that have accumulated and you have pushed to the side and not properly dealt with. And when these issues crawl their way to the surface in the clarity of sobriety, it can hit you like a ton of bricks. Years of anger, resentment, guilt and frustration that you didn't even know existed, that you suppressed with alcohol for so long, are suddenly hoisted upon you, and it's overwhelming. The one tool that you relied on in a subconscious and cowardly attempt to deal with these issues is now gone, and there is nothing left in the toolbox. It's like learning how to walk again, and at this stage I have no answers as to how to confront this. Unfortunately, dealing with this is not as simple as just acknowledging it and letting it go. But I'm grateful that I finally have the clarity of mind to at least acknowledge it and begin to look for answers. I suspect that it will be even more difficult and require more hard work than the wagon, but it is something which would have never been possible without the wagon itself.

The first and most difficult step in solving such thorny and longstanding emotional problems is to achieve clarity about their nature. This can be difficult not because the answers are hidden and require a great deal of digging and rumination, but much more often because the answers are rather obvious and near to hand but accepting their plainness requires a certain kind of humility. More often than not, we already know what these answers are, or could know them after a time of relatively straightforward objective reflection, similar to the kind we would perform were we asked for advice by a close friend. The difficulty then lies in accepting the verdict of such a reflection and not being tempted to search for other and supposedly "deeper" answers in our mythical past or in the farther recesses of our psychology. In short, one must have the courage to ask simple questions, and the humility to accept simple answers.

Once something like clarity has been achieved about a longstanding emotional problem -- once it has been demystified and brought to the light of day -- it is often apparent after some further reflection whether there are practical steps that can be taken to improve the situation. Sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes no -- and if it's the latter, that should be acknowledged and accepted as well. That kind of acceptance is rarely pleasant, but practice does make it easier.

It's really in the end not too different from the approach one must take towards the wagon, and which you so justly characterized in your post as both sensible and maddening. And the key to being successful at it is not to try to do it all at once; not to try to address all of one's problems, however few or many there may be, at a stroke. Start with any of them -- perhaps one that seems smaller and more tractable -- and ask the kinds of plain questions that will lead you, after some objective reflection, to plain answers. Then understand what if anything can be done, and at what cost, while never losing sight for too long of the clarity that has been achieved and which is in itself a help and a relief when sustained over time. Repeat this procedure as many times as required, always knowing, just as you noted above, that small victories add up and make the next one a little easier.

Last and most importantly -- you should never let these problems, or even the process of solving them, acquire a disproportionate importance in the life of your mind. Your psychology is, for the most part, what it is -- it's good to become clear about it and to improve it whenever possible, but it's in many ways simply a part of life and a part of what and who you are. But there is a world outside of yourself and outside of your psychology, and that objective world is the true source of all interest, pleasure, variety, it's the true source of life. Do not neglect to sometimes simply forget about your problems -- or at least set them aside -- and open your heart and mind to that world outside of yourself; and you will be rewarded in surprising ways, one of which is that the problems themselves may over time come to seem smaller and less involving and deserving of your attention.

It is true that one the great virtues of the wagon is that allows one to achieve some clarity about oneself; but a far greater virtue even than that is that it affords the opportunity to simply sit on an outdoor bench on some summer day, turn your face to the world, and take it in as and how it is. You'll be there one day and you'll know what I mean.

Post: #2228

Thank you Lizard of Oz.

Post: #2229

Just a quick bump up. 37 days sober. Being very busy helps. Helping a friend to finish off his new house; insulation and inner stuff.Will write a summary in the next few days.

Post: #2230

(08-05-2018 02:30 PM)Horus Wrote:  This wagon is a hell of a ride isn't it? At least it has been and is for me.

It's coming up to the 8.5 month point for me, and I'm truly grateful for every morning that I wake up with a clear head and the promise of a day to come. I'm grateful to Lizard of Oz for providing the tools for myself and others to make a profound change in our lives. And I'm grateful to the people who have shared their experiences in this thread - it's comforting at times to go back and reread what has been written here.

I'm finally at the stage where I've gained enough momentum to know with absolute certainty that I will make it to one year and there's nothing that can stop me - I'm not being complacent, but there has been a definite mind shift, away from facing each day as a battle of will power which needs to be conquered, towards embracing and enjoying the ride for what it is. I still have thoughts about drinking, and sometimes even strong urges. But while these urges used to be an obsession, they are now merely passing thoughts, free of compulsion or urgency, and never something that will preoccupy my brain for more than the time it takes to decide what to wear in the morning. For a long time, Lizard's advice to acknowledge these thoughts and just let them go was absolutely maddening advice for me. It all seemed like sensible advice and I tried to put it into action every time, but how the hell could I just let these thoughts go as easily as that? Does he not understand that I'm overwhelmed with these thoughts and there is too much to just push to the side? Easy for him to say perhaps. Well, the answer is that it's not easy, nor is it supposed to be easy. In fact that's the whole point. Because every time you face these thoughts and come out on top, it becomes fractionally easier the next time. Every success is like chipping away at a wall with a tiny chisel, and although it doesn't seem like you're making progress from day to day, the accumulation of these tiny successes over time is what strengthens your frame of mind and allows you to begin break free of the inevitably of acting on these thoughts. There are no shortcuts and it requires a lot of work. Even though I understood this advice nine months ago, only time allowed me to understand it. I'm still humble enough to know that I still need to be vigilent because this is all new to me and I suspect I'm only beginning to scratch the surface. But in a weird way, I actually welcome these thoughts and I enjoy the ease at which I set them aside until they return.

The thing about the wagon for someone who has spent so many years as a heavy drinker is that you are starkly confronted with all the aspects of your life that you have neglected. Of course there are the obvious things such as health and finances, and these are things which improve almost automatically. But then there are the deeper emotional issues, things that have accumulated and you have pushed to the side and not properly dealt with. And when these issues crawl their way to the surface in the clarity of sobriety, it can hit you like a ton of bricks. Years of anger, resentment, guilt and frustration that you didn't even know existed, that you suppressed with alcohol for so long, are suddenly hoisted upon you, and it's overwhelming. The one tool that you relied on in a subconscious and cowardly attempt to deal with these issues is now gone, and there is nothing left in the toolbox. It's like learning how to walk again, and at this stage I have no answers as to how to confront this. Unfortunately, dealing with this is not as simple as just acknowledging it and letting it go. But I'm grateful that I finally have the clarity of mind to at least acknowledge it and begin to look for answers. I suspect that it will be even more difficult and require more hard work than the wagon, but it is something which would have never been possible without the wagon itself.

Keep going Horus

Post: #2231

32 years sober

Post: #2232

(08-25-2018 03:32 PM)Polniy_Sostav Wrote:  32 years sober

Is that 32 years, as in you've never drunk in your life, or you quit drinking 32 years ago?

Post: #2233

Been following this thread for a long time, very helpful.
I've tried to quit many times but end up after a usually a week or less fucking up and going on a binge smashed and hungover, regretful, and messing me up physically and mentally. I'm sick and tired of it - but usually get bored after 5 days no drink and f - up.

I've stumbled across from my endless research a drug called naltrexone
which seems ideal for me being a drinker who finds it v hard to stop at just 1 or 2 and getting smashed.

The drug has been recommended by jordan peterson for binge drinkers like me:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQPz4YVSkyQ&t=124s

a documentary has also been done on this drug:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3427772/

There are also endless highly positive reviews from people who have taken it:https://www.drugs.com/comments/naltrexone/

i'm going to see a doctor tell him straight i want/need this - hope he doesn't push back - no matter what i need to give this a try get my hands on it.

Does anyone have experience of this drug? it blocks the opioid receptors so simply get no buzz when take it 1 hour before drinking - i can't see how this can not work for me and many others as shown above - would love to hear peoples thoughts and experiences.

Post: #2234

adamf133 - I have experience with Naltrexone and The Sinclair Method (which you are are describing). Another user asked me about it in a separate thread. Here is my response to him:

——-

Bacchus - believe it or not, I practiced the Sinclair Method with Naltrexone for over a year when I was in my 20's. It was my first attempt to get my shit together, and for that, I will always be grateful. Dr. Roy Eskapa's The Cure for Alcoholism is a fascinating read for anyone who wants to learn A LOT more about the science of addiction.

My first six months on Nal were incredible. I thought I had found my magic bullet. The following six months were a slug-fest, as the side effects of the medication started taking their toll, and I got lazy about taking my Nal an hour before drinking. My issue with the method is this: we are not Sinclair's rats. We are human beings subject to social situations and pressures, and we can decide whether or not to take the pill. We can easily reason that if we don't, we can experience the up-regulation high of naked drinking. This got to be too much for me. If I had gotten the Naltrexone implant, I think my alcoholism would have been addressed, but the side effects would have made me intolerable. Hangovers on Nal (even after just a few beers) were unbearable, my dick was useless, and you would be missing out on tasty endorphin from all other activities like sex, eating, and exercise.

The point I want to make is that Naltrexone + the Sinclair Method is very powerful. Shit is legit. But I'd only recommend it to those booze bags that can be rigidly disciplined about taking the Nal an hour before, come hell or high water. You would also have to be committed to a schedule of getting your endorphin up-regulation on days when you weren't dosing, through exercise, sex, or eating. In my late 20's I did not have the structure and discipline to handle this. Furthermore, Nal just eliminates the manic high of drinking; it doesn't actively create a unpleasant response to alcohol, specifically.

Post: #2235

(09-22-2018 12:06 PM)Charlemagne In Sweatpants Wrote:  adamf133 - I have experience with Naltrexone and The Sinclair Method (which you are are describing). Another user asked me about it in a separate thread. Here is my response to him:

——-

Bacchus - believe it or not, I practiced the Sinclair Method with Naltrexone for over a year when I was in my 20's. It was my first attempt to get my shit together, and for that, I will always be grateful. Dr. Roy Eskapa's The Cure for Alcoholism is a fascinating read for anyone who wants to learn A LOT more about the science of addiction.

My first six months on Nal were incredible. I thought I had found my magic bullet. The following six months were a slug-fest, as the side effects of the medication started taking their toll, and I got lazy about taking my Nal an hour before drinking. My issue with the method is this: we are not Sinclair's rats. We are human beings subject to social situations and pressures, and we can decide whether or not to take the pill. We can easily reason that if we don't, we can experience the up-regulation high of naked drinking. This got to be too much for me. If I had gotten the Naltrexone implant, I think my alcoholism would have been addressed, but the side effects would have made me intolerable. Hangovers on Nal (even after just a few beers) were unbearable, my dick was useless, and you would be missing out on tasty endorphin from all other activities like sex, eating, and exercise.

The point I want to make is that Naltrexone + the Sinclair Method is very powerful. Shit is legit. But I'd only recommend it to those booze bags that can be rigidly disciplined about taking the Nal an hour before, come hell or high water. You would also have to be committed to a schedule of getting your endorphin up-regulation on days when you weren't dosing, through exercise, sex, or eating. In my late 20's I did not have the structure and discipline to handle this. Furthermore, Nal just eliminates the manic high of drinking; it doesn't actively create a unpleasant response to alcohol, specifically.

Thanks for this - v helpful can't beat hearing your direct experience, think i will be giving this a go to start with once i manage to convince a doctor (medical industry seem clueless here).

I have some Qs on what you said:

You say the first 6 months were incredible - how was that with the terrible side effects you describe?
no sex drive,v bad hangovers with just a few beers? etc? did side effects come later after 6 months? is it potluck you got these side effects - some ppl report none some do from reading reviews.

How long does nal stay in system - blocking highs to manage getting a good rush in gym , sex etc? does it literally effect that just like the alcohol rush on it?

When you stopped taking nal you just abstained? i guess it's easier after as changed behaviour with alcohol with using this drug which is my long term plan.

Post: #2236

For the first time since I quit, over 2.5 years ago, I was sorely tempted the other night to have a beer.

I was on the plane on my was to Ibiza to catch up with some old friends, something about the combination of going to that island again, all the memories of the drink and the drugs and the parties made me want to drink.

I stayed strong, got to the hotel just by the seafront, and caught up with my friends. I also ordered an ice cold sparkling water and the feeling went. It was dehaydration.

I’m also rewarded with a great photo of me and my best friends of 30 years. I’m in better shape now and better looking compared to the photos of my in Ibiza 10 years ago when I was fat and bloated through drink and drugs.

Stay strong amigos, wagon is worth it.

Post: #2237

(07-14-2018 08:21 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  

(07-14-2018 11:01 AM)pirate Wrote:  Almost clean for a month. I am falling asleep within 20 mins without performing complicated routines, taking multiple supplements or worrying too much about it. Pure bliss.

I do not have a desire to drink.

Problem is in my mind I have failed already. I am meeting old friends in Thailand in September for a reunion.I can meet them without alcohol, but I cannot seem to separate the idea of meeting women from drinking alcohol with them.

I cannot put the trip off either, at this point I am so thirsty for pussy that I cannot seem to enjoy anything without feeling a sense of deprivation. No amout of Albert Ellis books seems to cure this.

Alright man, so what you are saying is:

-- It's impossible to enjoy anything in life if you don't have pussy
-- The only known way to get pussy is to go to Thailand in September
-- Pursuing pussy in Thailand in September must be accompanied by drinking
-- Therefore, as night follows day, it follows that you must drink on this September Thai trip and break your wagon. It is ordained and cannot be avoided, it's outside of your control.

I can almost respect this level of insanity, but I'm afraid the key word there is "almost".

The reality, for what it's worth, is as follows:

-- You can of course enjoy other things in life even if you are deprived of pussy for whatever reason. Albert Ellis books are indeed insufficient in themselves; you must also act on their lessons and this requires a great deal of patience. Changing the way you think and feel about very basic things does not happen overnight.

-- Whatever your situation with respect to pussy, relying on drunken Thai trips as your sole means of obtaining it does not seem like the best possible strategy.

-- If you do go on this trip, nothing -- of course -- forces you to drink while you're there. Not even an out of control ladyboy on meth is likely to force a drink down your throat. It is entirely within your power to continue to abstain from alcohol at all times. You say that you cannot "seem" to separate the idea of meeting women from drinking, but again the operative word there is seem. In fact, these are two different things and can be rather easily separated should you choose to separate them.

-- Last, and most importantly: as long as you haven't had a drink since you declared your wagon, you haven't failed yet. Having "failed" in your mind is irrelevant, because you now have a chance to change your mind and to do what you know is right -- which is sticking with a decision that you took solemnly and staked your pride on, for good reasons. That is what you can and should do, and I hope you will.

Lizard, congratulations for this - not only raising this topic but also being the "driver of this wagon". Probably the most interesting thread of this forum, and I appreciate the general optimism and sincerity of everyone here, as compared with the AA style.

Count me in, as of today. I was already some 4 months without drinking last year and the balance was very positive, I thnk I am more than willing and capable of achieving 12 months.

Post: #2238

(09-22-2018 01:34 PM)adamf133 Wrote:  You say the first 6 months were incredible - how was that with the terrible side effects you describe?
no sex drive,v bad hangovers with just a few beers? etc? did side effects come later after 6 months? is it potluck you got these side effects - some ppl report none some do from reading reviews.

Some perspective is needed here. During that six-month stretch, I did feel incredible, but only because I went from being a completely dysfunctional alcoholic to a somewhat functional alcoholic. I tracked all off my "drinking units" during my stint on Naltrexone. Before I started the medication, I was drinking around 80-90 units of alcohol a week -- practically a full-time job of boozing. During the first six months, I got down to around 35-40 units a week with a few alcohol-free days scattered in there. If I'm honest with myself, I was still drinking way too much. But compared to the way things were, it was noticeably better.

As for the side effects, they were always there. As I spent more time on the medication, they got worse -- especially the hangovers. They didn't necessarily "come later after six months." Six months was around the time that they reached a very frustrating degree.

(09-22-2018 01:34 PM)adamf133 Wrote:  How long does nal stay in system - blocking highs to manage getting a good rush in gym , sex etc? does it literally effect that just like the alcohol rush on it?

Depends on the dosage. I started by taking 50 mg an hour before drinking. The general rule is that 50 mg will cover you for about 24 hours. I experimented with lower dosages at points, such as 25 mg, or even less if I felt like I wouldn't be drinking for more than an hour or so.

It absolutely affects your endorphin intake, beyond just the endorphin produced by alcohol. Those good vibes that you get from exercise, sex, food -- all of that is diminished. If I dosed for several days in a row on 50 mg, I would have this persistent "blue" feeling.

(09-22-2018 01:34 PM)adamf133 Wrote:  When you stopped taking nal you just abstained? i guess it's easier after as changed behaviour with alcohol with using this drug which is my long term plan.

When I stopped taking Nal, I boozed like a self-destructive asshole for several more years. At one point I couldn't take it anymore, went to rehab, and I got on the wagon for real -- staked my pride on staying sober. Yesterday, I completed three years on the wagon. They have been the best three years of my life -- far greater than any time I spent trying to manage my drinking on Naltrexone. If there's one message you take from this post, it's that.

I'm going to reflect a little more on everything that has happened over the past year (in particular), and post those thoughts when the time is right. For now, I am officially re-upping for year four.

Post: #2239

I'm now 4 months, 5 days and 9 hours without alcohol according to my app.
It isn't the first time that I stay sober. A few years back I manage for about a year or so.
Germany is a high level alcohol society, almost all events start with alcohol and I did drink quite a lot when younger. Never missed a festival or a night out. Over the years I got more into sports and reduced drinking, never drank at home. Still went out like every second month or so and drink moderate or sometimes more the last years. Every time in the morning it got more bad, I could handle it less and less. I didn't get aggressive nor other negative stuff. Those years are long behind me but it wasn't great either. I tend to drink more and more and keep a certain level.

I did know it don't do me anything good still couldn't get rid of alcohol and apply it to my lifestyle. I go out almost zero and if so I can stay sober. Its not an issue any more. Next day I feel a way better. Consider also alcohol caused me in the past some problems and also lead to some family issues its better to stay away. I'm in good shape, I keep my mind sharp and the first awkward feeling is my weakness that I overcome. Stand strong and say no is a task not many can do. Instead of improve their life, many people get wasted and call it fun.
At weekends I weak up early and fresh. Do some sports and can focus on my life. Not lay all day in bed and achieve nothing because my body try to get out the poison.

Maybe I will switch to some moderate drinking at some special events. Like 1 - 3 beers at some evening. Who knows, at the moment I have no desire for it.

Post: #2240

Just checking in as I have currently reached the half way point of my second year on the wagon (18 months total). I'm happy to say that I'm back to being in shape again as I lost nearly 40 pounds through intermittent fasting and lots of exercise, I was 224 lbs and now 184.6. Although I didn't get into the the electricians apprenticeship program this time around, I continue to get the necessary experience needed so I get in the next time around. I'm currently with a company that is building a big data center. These next few months might be a major challenge to my sobriety as the temperature drops and the stresses of the job ratchets up also going from 40 hours per week to 60 ( 6 days a week/ 10 hours per day) doesn't help. But I know that my will and beliefs are strong and I can get through anything if I stay focused on the goal at hand.

Post: #2241

(09-24-2018 10:07 AM)Frank Mackey Wrote:  Lizard, congratulations for this - not only raising this topic but also being the "driver of this wagon". Probably the most interesting thread of this forum, and I appreciate the general optimism and sincerity of everyone here, as compared with the AA style.

Count me in, as of today. I was already some 4 months without drinking last year and the balance was very positive, I thnk I am more than willing and capable of achieving 12 months.

Frank Mackey, thank you for the post and particularly for your comments on this thread. To say that it's "probably the most interesting thread of this forum" is a profound observation, and may seem surprising given the thread's seemingly limited purpose and structure. But I agree and feel the same way about it.

Welcome aboard as of September 24, 2018 and I look forward to hearing more from you here as time goes on.

Post: #2242

(09-24-2018 10:38 AM)Charlemagne In Sweatpants Wrote:  Yesterday, I completed three years on the wagon. They have been the best three years of my life -- far greater than any time I spent trying to manage my drinking on Naltrexone. If there's one message you take from this post, it's that.

I'm going to reflect a little more on everything that has happened over the past year (in particular), and post those thoughts when the time is right. For now, I am officially re-upping for year four.

CIS, reading this made me very happy. To reflect on one's three wagon years and remark that they have been the best three years of one's life -- and to truly mean it, as I know you do -- is a big deal, in fact the biggest deal there is.

Welcome back aboard for year 4 as of September 23, 2018 and I hope to hear more from you in this thread over time.

Post: #2243

(09-24-2018 01:34 PM)Parzival Wrote:  I'm now 4 months, 5 days and 9 hours without alcohol according to my app.
It isn't the first time that I stay sober. A few years back I manage for about a year or so.
Germany is a high level alcohol society, almost all events start with alcohol and I did drink quite a lot when younger. Never missed a festival or a night out. Over the years I got more into sports and reduced drinking, never drank at home. Still went out like every second month or so and drink moderate or sometimes more the last years. Every time in the morning it got more bad, I could handle it less and less. I didn't get aggressive nor other negative stuff. Those years are long behind me but it wasn't great either. I tend to drink more and more and keep a certain level.

I did know it don't do me anything good still couldn't get rid of alcohol and apply it to my lifestyle. I go out almost zero and if so I can stay sober. Its not an issue any more. Next day I feel a way better. Consider also alcohol caused me in the past some problems and also lead to some family issues its better to stay away. I'm in good shape, I keep my mind sharp and the first awkward feeling is my weakness that I overcome. Stand strong and say no is a task not many can do. Instead of improve their life, many people get wasted and call it fun.
At weekends I weak up early and fresh. Do some sports and can focus on my life. Not lay all day in bed and achieve nothing because my body try to get out the poison.

Maybe I will switch to some moderate drinking at some special events. Like 1 - 3 beers at some evening. Who knows, at the moment I have no desire for it.

Parzival, thank you for the post. You might want to consider committing to a full year and seeing how it goes; then after the year ends you can reevaluate. If you decide to do so, please post your start date here and I will officially welcome you aboard.

Post: #2244

Dropping by to confirm my completion of the hat-trick, as of yesterday, September 28th.

It took a while, but I can confidently say that my life is better now than it ever was on the sauce. Or at least I’m better now. The feeling of missing out by my not drinking is no longer apparent. These days I try to keep the navel-gazing to a minimum, but some discernible improvements I have made because of the wagon include the obvious; eating, sleeping, training, and a better overall mindset. The, I guess, less obvious improvement, or perhaps the one I hadn’t fully anticipated is what I have come to see as the true magic of the wagon; I am a nicer person. There have been other factors at work; developing some excellent habits like daily meditation, daily writing, and weekly yoga. But none of this would have been possible without the wagon. Upon this rock I shall build my church and all that. I turned 30 this year, and believe I have created an excellent base for entering the prime years of my life. I’ve matured greatly, and feel ready to enter fatherhood in the next 5-10 years.

This might be my favourite thread on the forum. There is some literary gold to be found in these pages. Much of it is, quite rightly, rather deep and philosophical. But I’ve always thought that the best advice is practical, and I would like to leave this gem that Charlemagne wrote a few months back. It’s the type of comment that could easily be overlooked in a thread as profound at this, but I reckon it should be required reading for anyone considering, or on, the wagon, particularly those guys who are in the challenging early days:

Quote:One of the biggest pieces of advice I can give to those on the wagon is this: you shouldn't try to live your life the exact same way, just sans-alcohol. Don't keep the same company. Don't keep the same late hours. Don't double-down on the same lifestyle. Don't shoehorn sobriety into your life. Instead, put the wagon first and remain open to the type of life that it can offer you. You may find that passing on a Friday night at the local shithole (forcing yourself through the motions with a club soda) leaves you more likely to get up early on a Saturday morning. Maybe you go to the farmer's market. Maybe you ask a cute Latina if a particular avocado feels ripe. Maybe - over time - this whole world of early mornings and the characters that inhabit them opens up to you, and you come to find yourself enjoying them deeply.

So yeah, a lot done, more to do.

Signing on for year four.

Post: #2245

3extra, thank you for this post. What could be better than two fat, hefty, beautiful treys -- yours and CIS's -- hitting back-to-back like that, and not so long after komatiite's last month? The answer is that there is nothing better. Thanks also for singling out that superb and valuable passage from CIS's earlier post.

Welcome back aboard for year 4 as of September 28, 2018 and I look forward to hearing more from you here over time.

Post: #2246

About 2 years ago I completed my first one year wagon. I'm jumping back on today Oct. 15th 2018 for another year.

Post: #2247

10 and a half months (stopped sometime in mid December) no drinks 3 weeks off weed now (off topic), feel great

Post: #2248

(10-14-2018 11:02 PM)Off The Reservation Wrote:  About 2 years ago I completed my first one year wagon. I'm jumping back on today Oct. 15th 2018 for another year.

OTR, that's really good to hear. Welcome back aboard as of October 15, 2018 and I look forward to hearing more from you here as time goes on.

Post: #2249

(10-15-2018 12:16 AM)godfather dust Wrote:  10 and a half months (stopped sometime in mid December) no drinks 3 weeks off weed now (off topic), feel great

godfather dust, if you are in for the full year -- however much remains of it -- please post your start date in this thread, and I will officially welcome you aboard. If you don't know your exact start date make it a date by which you're certain that you never had a drink since then.

Post: #2250

I'll say December 25th, it was earlier but didn't drink Christmas or New year's.