Post: #1

One of my biggest causes of flakes for obvious reasons, but I feel like it doesn't necessarily need to be handled the same way as a flake due to lack of interest. Often these women seem very interested but I think get scared because their English is almost nonexistent and that not sure how we'll ever talk our way through a second encounter.

I'm thinking in such a scenario it might even make sense to up the persistence - keep messaging, etc - which would obviously be a horrible move if she just wasn't all that sold. Just seems like in such a scenario repeated contacts will up the chance of her just saying fuck it and giving it a go eventually. I have found they sometimes get back in touch later on down the road. Then again, thirsty pursuit is not really my style so not sure I want to go that route.

Anyhow, once I get these women in my presence I usually do very well with body language and physical humor - not to mention just working with what little bit we have. Especially with some drinks. It's bridging the gap from phone number to second meeting that stalls me.

What are your guy's thoughts? SEA Guys? Any particular strategies for dealing with language flakes?

I suppose I should just stop pursuing women who don't speak English to improve my odds but I honestly can't help myself. I find a language barrier sexy and cute for no apparent rational reason and have fun with it. Maybe just because it's a challenge?

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #2

You need to drop the "We'll practice your English, but you have to help me practice my XYZ" seed a little harder in the initial conversation. It seems to erode some of the language pressure that they feel. But, apart from that, there's little you can do about the miscommunication factor over text--that could be telegraphing all sorts of messages through their limited English filters.

Post: #3

(08-05-2013 10:31 AM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  You need to drop the "We'll practice your English, but you have to help me practice my XYZ" seed a little harder in the initial conversation. It seems to erode some of the language pressure that they feel. But, apart from that, there's little you can do about the miscommunication factor over text--that could be telegraphing all sorts of messages through their limited English filters.

Good point. I think you're right. I've flirted with that angle in the past and it often becomes an easy basis to get a number, but I never took it seriously enough or pushed it to its maximum advantage. I'm going to try to work with it some more.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #4

if anything, you might want to try to talking in her language as much as possible and het her to teach you in a fun, light way. imo asian girls (except maybe korea and japan) seem to love teaching the westerner their language. the role reversal is fun and it shows you actually have an interest in the culture. of course once she shows up do whatever the hell you want, but you need to give her the reason not to flake

Post: #5

(08-05-2013 09:55 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  I suppose I should just stop pursuing women who don't speak English to improve my odds but I honestly can't help myself. I find a language barrier sexy and cute for no apparent rational reason and have fun with it. Maybe just because it's a challenge?

I am a newly found believer in language barriers. In my limited experience, it's a win-win situation.

1.) She won't talk so much for fear that you won't understand(I like my women quiet haha).
2.) You can get away with saying almost anything because you are just a dumb foreigner butchering her language.

3.) It forces you to rely on physical escalation much earlier on.

That said, I don't know if this applies everywhere. Some cultures put more value on verbosity. From what I hear about Russia, you need to be able to quote Dostoevsky and tell half hour jokes in order to keep a bird's attention.