Post: #26

I also suffered from serious depression towards the end of my high school year.

Let's be honest: High school sucks. It's making you depressed.

So, I'd say two things:

1. You need to change your environment. College will be a big step forward for you.

2. You should prepare for the adult world now and develop your mind and body - hit the gym, do a side job, eat lots of protein and avoid junk food, etc.

3, But until you go to college, Travel. It WILL help you get over your ennui over your empty high school existence.

Don't you have any relatives somewhere far off that you could visit? Ask your parents for help.

Post: #27

Also dude, as you're only 17 (good for you!) you happen to have been born into a really shit time in history where communities have all but disolved and everyone is focussed on stupid shit like having the latest iPhone.

Having said that, there have always been unhappy people for various reasons throughout history so what I said is not the only reason.

It can be so many factors: genetic (you mentioned your father, dude, that is really sad and you are still so young relatively speaking, something like that takes a bigger toll on you than you realize. Well, not to patronize, I'm sure you're better aware than anyone else but you know what I mean)

This is also the "imbalance of chemicals" argument. This is where drugs like Prozac etc come into play. However, without being a doctor, I would say try to avoid that path for now.

It could be diet. Do you eat shit food like fried, take-away, coca cola etc? That stuff really fucks people up, it's poison (despite being so tasty!)

It can be something as stupid and minor as a bad tooth that is infecting your blood (no joke)

Which European country? Finnland for example has the highest suicide rate in the world. Why? Coz it's fucking dark there all year round. Every noticed how in England, everyone is depressed all the time until summer rolls around, suddenly they're are all out in t-shirts loving life. It's MAJOR. Look up SAD syndrome.

Sounds like you have had a fucked up upbringing - don't feel alone, so many do and keep it to themselves. My parents divorced wheh I was 11 - total nightmare. I think my mum is an undiagnosed depressive. I must have picked some up too. I dwell a lot. Check out Tyler/Owen's videos over on the RSD (Real Social Dynamics) to see how a guy has transformed himself from someone similar to you to who he is today - awesome dude)

As far as advice goes, a therapist - (they are not all the same, differernt styles, different people within the same style) can certainly help. It does not mean you are weird or fucked up. Every therapist themselves must talk with a thereapist, it's the rules! I have a friend, after 3 years, did her the world of good. For me, I didn't like it but that's me... (and I'm still partially fucked up!)

Another thing - what you focus on. I tend to focus on myself and my dreams and my ambitions far too much. All that looking inward can make you feel anxious. People have said that the moment you focus on helping others, a lot of that shit disappears.

Meditation - I think this is one of the greatest and most overlooked things on the planet. Learning it alone is so difficult. But if you find a group... This shit should be taught to all children from the age of 5. I am not kidding. Having done it, and experienced the feeling it gives you... all those worries and concerns you have now will cease to exist. It cannot be explained in words, only experienced. I reccomend TM, Transcendental Meditation. It is very easy to learn and do. The Beetles did it in the 60s over in India. It costs a lot to do if you go with the offical group. (like $1,500 or something) but it's a skill for life. I did it in London with a breakaway group for £150. Same teaching, a fraction of the price.

Yes, perhaps everything you tried and hated just wasn't your thing, your sport. Football for example. I fucking hate football! But I like photography and martial arts, and I want to do sky diving and ride a motorbike, I like arthouse cinema... try stuff. See what you like. Maybe surfing, rock climbing. So banging hot girls is not your thing. You could be someone who just likes being in a single long term relationship. They can be amazing. Maybe you don't like girls and like boys! (understand that I've never met you so am not passing judgement, but fuck, I've heard about stuff like that before - just food for thought, and if it turns out to be true, all power to tou, you'd be surprised how supportive PUA guys are of any decission someone makes, as long as it's what they truly want)

As the others have said, asking these questions at 17 is cool. I was a goth for my whole teens, that's the unoffical sub-group for depressed people! Maybe you should be a goth! Listen to the Sisters of Mercy, "Floodland" album - fucking awesome!

But know this - your brain is a machine and can be controlled by you - the hardest thing to achieve in life. It will make a slave of YOU otherwise. Everytime you repeat something, a thought, a belief or an action, it gets ingrained further into your brain, actually physically thus and easier for your brain to process. Know too that the brain will always take the path of least ressistance.

So, if you form a habit of "being depressed", your brain will flow down that path and flood you with appropriate chemicals and thoughts to make that your reality. It will become true.

If you can consciously change that for a while (they say 30 days to form a new habbit) then you can decide what kind of feelings and life you want. EASIER said than done, but you are young and your brain is maluable right now.

Try everything - you may be a combo of those things. Could be your country's weather is too shit for you, you diet is bad and you hate football. It might be as simple as that.

Sounds more like there is something in your family from what you told us BUT... a practice like meditation and taking up a sport like Kick-Boxing or boxing or Jui-Jitsu might be all you need. Look into yoga too, a good class, it was designed by men for men, yes lots of girls are into it now but it's for men. Besides, the classes are always filled with hot chicks!

Go out and try stuff, my man. Whatvere you do, don't do a Columbine Massacre style thing. Those intense feelings pass as you get into your 20s anyway. I feel deeply sorry for those guys who went down that path; the ones who are still alive now live in a virtual hell on earth.

Always come back here for more advice before any decission, or talk with a therapist, that is after all what they are traind to talk about and resolve professionlly.

You are not alone bro!

Gift

Post: #28

You've seen the real world from such a young age so you feel like you aren't in with your peers. I'd seen it from a young age too but not quite to the extent that you're exposed to with the manosphere, and I've felt the same for a long time.

That's probably a big factor in what's affecting you.

Read "Red Pill Isolation" by Bill Powell. You're not alone, mate. /thread-19972.html

Everything I see around me is fake or efforts to boost egos. Everyone has an overblown sense of worth when really their lives are meaningless and no different to everyone they're pretending to be trying to run away from.

Find out what makes you feel like you're filling the hole inside you, no matter how much it is, and concentrate on that. It could be earning money, it could be travelling and seeing the world, it could be creating something and building it and watching it grow, or whatever. When you're 18, the world will open up to you and you'll be able to venture out a lot more.

Post: #29

(06-03-2013 04:03 PM)MikeCF Wrote:  Improving your connection with other people can help boost brain serotonin, which creates a virtuous circle. That is, the more you help others, the more serotonin you get, and thus the more *natural* it becomes to feel happy and connected to your world.

Give it a try. Every day for a month, do something to help others. It could be something like making a small donation to charity, helping an old lady with her groceries, or paying a stranger a sincere compliment.

It may be hard for you at first. The more you do it, the easier it becomes. After a while, being connected will become natural and your feelings of happiness will increase.

Sounds like an excellent component to life-hacking, which I believe is the greater manosphere aim.

Post: #30

It's been my general impression that the manosphere has a dark side that deliberately aims for the disease of low affect.

Here we have people finally opening up and talking about low affect as a problem to be dealt with.

For the most part though, what we see is the opposite. Feelings are to be deliberately muted.

So this is why I again and again remind people that it is efficatious to game girls with HIGH affect. Not only that, but it is the wise life choice.

Being an anhedonic drone is poor life hacking. Who wants that plus player burnout?

Deliberately seeking out bonding, affection, warm feelings - that is life hacking, and it is strong LTR game that ensnares women at the deepest level.

Low affect is for chumps. Yes, I said it. I've said it before, and I'll keep saying it.

Post: #31

read Ecclesiastes.
if that doesn't shock you with feelings you might be a sociopath

Post: #32

You claim to not have feelings but you post doesn't read like a Stoic. Which leads me to believe that you really FEEL depressed, desperate, or generally bad.

This means that you are in denial about your feelings. Which means that you secretly wish you were like those cool guys who are constantly laughing and having fun with women.

You need to challenge yourself, period, no fucking excuses.
"God I feel like shit. Going to go throw some weights around and get jacked."
"God I'm in an antisocial funk today. Going to act like a clown until I can lighten up."

Post: #33

Is is possible to be depressed whilst simultaneously considering yourself happy?

It seems like a contradiction in terms - but a friend at work was insistent that this is possible. And was trying to say that I was depressed - but just in denial. Even though I love my life and am always looking forward to things. But - he based his analysis on the fact that I don't give a shit about anything.

The whole conversation was pretty surreal. It reminded me of one of my favourite comedy sketches:

Post: #34

I had a friend who had a father with aspergers and a mother who was a sociopath. Maybe you got that genetic combo as well?

Post: #35

I think its a mix of heavy depression/stress and boredom from stale environments. I had this as well.

-My dog died
-My grandmother died (depression)
-Family falling apart a little from grandmother dying (even more depression)
-I got into professional school. (high stress)

High stress+ Depression/Trauma made me a robot. Dulled my emotions. I started seeing colors as less vivid, slept less and felt loopy. Food tasted bland. I started getting frequent tinnitus (ringing in the ears). Really odd looking back...

What did it for me was getting away from it all. I took a 30 minute drive to a park and sat by myself and watched the trees sway. I listened to music, watched TV, got away from the family grief and took a long trip to visit a friend.

Some other things that that might help- Strenous Physical Exercise (weights, boxing, rowing, etc), some drugs (mdma, shrooms, peyote).

Post: #36

Depression and all sorts of mental issues run in my family. Dealt with it since primary school. I still can't really tell when I'm feeling positive (usually I just make a decision based on what actually happened and makes the most sense, there are definite moments of lucidity, though), but changing things up numbs those voices in your head. Get away from wherever you are, and do exactly what you want to do. If you don't know what you want to do right now, start working on that. As soon as you start becoming aware of your own wants and needs, your happiness levels improve immensely.

I take a lot of drugs, stay away from home for weeks at a time, come back for a night to rest (never happens, it's 5:14 am and I'm still up), then get back on my merry way, doing whatever the fuck I like in the mean time. It took me a very long while, but I realised that being at my parent's home just breeds paranoia, anxiety, and, ultimately, depression. Now, I'm moving into a new place in the next few days (hopefully), so I'll have none of those things around to bother me, and I'll be free to do as I wish.

Moral of the story: Work out what you want, and go out and get it. Get away from any toxic people/environments that could be contributing. Also, boredom is toxicity #1

Post: #37

You sound like a sociopath. I don't say that to be condescending, it's just that not having empathy is related to sociopath behavior.

Post: #38

(06-05-2013 12:31 PM)Samseau Wrote:  Let's be honest: High school sucks. It's making you depressed.

Damn son. You must have gone to the wrong high school. I had a fucking blast in high school. Things were so easy back then too.

Post: #39

(06-06-2013 04:25 PM)InternationPlayboy Wrote:  You sound like a sociopath. I don't say that to be condescending, it's just that not having empathy is related to sociopath behavior.

I've wondered that lately, whether I have any serious undiagnosed mental issues, and just what that would mean for the people around me, that I'm supposed to love, etc.. In the end you'll still be the same narcissistic introvert stuck in your head, rather than using it. I wrote an essay/rant about it just yesterday. The remedy for such an ailment is usually something new, exciting, and different. The same old thing leads to boredom, and, for me, at least, when I start getting bored, I get curious about all sorts of things I shouldn't.

Sidenote - I bet a lot of the members here are probably sociopathic to a greater extent than the general population.

Post: #40

I think you guys are making it sound a lot worse than it is, when I posted this thread I just had a rough day.
I haven't masturbated in a week and the weather has cleared up and I feel much better now, that I can go out and enjoy nature.
It's not like I don't enjoy things. It's just right now because I am still in school and not financially independent, I can't go and do the things I want, so I am pretty much stuck in a meaningless life.

Some others mentioned diet, I am on a very healthy diet, so that's not the problem
I might get a gym membership in the summer and start working out so I got more purpose in my life. Purpose seems to be one of the things missing in my life.

Post: #41

(06-06-2013 04:26 PM)InternationPlayboy Wrote:  

(06-05-2013 12:31 PM)Samseau Wrote:  Let's be honest: High school sucks. It's making you depressed.

Damn son. You must have gone to the wrong high school. I had a fucking blast in high school. Things were so easy back then too.

Mine was like a prison.

You couldn't go anywhere without a "hall pass." You had to listen to people lecture you about life.

I never intended to attend college. I tried a semester, after my dad begged me to. Loved it and never looked back.

High school isn't about learning and it's not for free thinkers. It's about teaching sheep to sit down and sit still, i.e., to become good little cube rats slaving away for a corporation.

Post: #42

OP is lacking passion. Actively search and find a passion that you can throw yourself into. As a kickstarter, read Kerouac's "On The Road", which should lift your interest in life in general. This is the one guy whose writing should liven you up.

Post: #43

OP - pour yourself into mastering something - especially consider something where you have to work with your hands.

Post: #44

To the original poster (little wing).

Try and watch this interview with Francis Beveridge. It is the most astonishing interview I have ever seen.

I just hope there is a way for you guys to watch it outside of the UK.

It is the second video clip (about a 1/4 of the way down) on the following page. The image of a guy playing the violin is embedded in the clip:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/adamcurtis/po...a_part_two

The guy's bleak honesty and despair is heroic. Although I think it was wrong of him to make his family suffer through it.

Post: #45

(06-06-2013 04:56 PM)little wing Wrote:  I think you guys are making it sound a lot worse than it is, when I posted this thread I just had a rough day.
I haven't masturbated in a week and the weather has cleared up and I feel much better now, that I can go out and enjoy nature.
It's not like I don't enjoy things. It's just right now because I am still in school and not financially independent, I can't go and do the things I want, so I am pretty much stuck in a meaningless life.

Some others mentioned diet, I am on a very healthy diet, so that's not the problem
I might get a gym membership in the summer and start working out so I got more purpose in my life. Purpose seems to be one of the things missing in my life.

Unless you're doing something that will get you earning $10,000+ a month on autopilot within 3-12 months then fuck yea! you're living a pretty meaningless life right now, no wonder you feel shit. What are you doing?

You're not going to be satisfied with your current and future life until you're on tract to getting financially independent and can book a plane ticket to wherever the fuck you want.

I don't like giving empty advice, so I will say you have the internet which is an INCREDIBLE resource to get what I described above going. The other thing I will suggest is to do whatever u can to associate with people who are where you want to be(wealthy). The second one is probably more important since you don't know shit about fuck in how to get up there right now which is totally fine. Remember that successful people have needs and desires too, they like making friends and bonds with people. You want to connect with what you want to achieve.

Post: #46

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