Post: #2226

That's deep.

No pun intended.

Post: #2227

(10-26-2016 03:50 PM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

(10-26-2016 02:28 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  Day 19. My nuts are actually aching.

Sign of pent up aggression. Right there with you right now bro.

It's odd. Unusual for me.

I've prided myself on having pretty good self control, all things considered. Ability to focus. Willpower over a lot of things.

Yet I would fail at this goal.

The past time I did this I avoided porn for some time, but I think around 2 weeks in I was jerking it in the shower. I cannot remember going this long, ever, without an orgasm.

I went climbing today and I reached a new level that I haven't before. Just about every day except today, I would get frustrated in a frankly pathetic way. I would try new route difficulties, find a challenge, and the negative thoughts would talk me out of pushing it. I would give up too early, without really trying. I would feel like whimpering to myself but prided myself on not giving in to such weakness.

Today was something else.

Background - I've been pushing my body pretty hard, going to the regular gym every week day, hitting my core a lot harder, and getting more reps than I've done for 3-4 years of working out. I've also lost 2 pant sizes. Back to where I was "skinnyfat" before, except my chest and shoulders are significantly bigger. Someone asked me the other day how I'd been losing weight, and I just told them I dropped a lot of carbs. I've been eating simple, easy meals of burger + veggies + fruit that takes me almost no time to make at night. 2 meals a day with ~16 hours between dinner and lunch. I've lost somewhere around 10-15 pounds depending on the day. I'm trying to do it slowly without losing much muscle, as I'm not far off now from where I want to be, bodyfat wise. 1.5-2 more pant sizes and I'm a totally flat, sixpack stomach.

So all of this going on, feeling great, I got productive frustration.

My only real comparison is back to when I was a kid, playing video games, and trying my damnedest to beat a level. I would go nuts, get frustrated as hell, but keep on doing what I could to beat the level. That carried over into my schoolwork and got me to where I am today, where I can honestly coast on a lot of solid past effort.

Anyway, I'm attacking the wall today with my frustration. I fell off? Fuck you, wall. I'm climbing up. Fell off a hold? Fuck that hold, I'm going to own it if I have to squeeze it off its mount so that I don't tumble. And on and on. I didn't get sapped of energy today. Didn't make excuses, just hit the wall harder than I had before. Attempting things that I just wouldn't have bothered before. Figuring out problems.

Angry. Controlled.

Post: #2228

Philosophical Recovery you are right about jerking off vs drinking. Maybe because jerking off is so much more solitary -- something you do alone where nobody but yourself is affected negatively, versus drinking where deep in my heart I knew I was at the point where any time I drank all bets were off and I could damage a relationship with a friend of family member, get a DUI and kill a person in a car crash, ruin my career with a legal issue, etc. On the other hand the only *victim* of porn abuse is me, and I'm self-destructive enough to not really care about that when I lose my focus on the big picture.

When I quit drinking I was really shy around women (I was quite embarrassed basically that I was one of *those people* who had to quit drinking) so I sort of retreated into a shell. I definitely had a few Friday nights spent alone watching porn instead of going out drinking and chasing women. Luckily I met a girl a month-ish into quitting drinking who I dated, but when we were apart I would still hit up PornHub way too much. I moved due to work away from her in like May and we broke up, so I fell right back into the rut of porn again. Sometime around the start of July I quit porn after reading through this thread and now I am at 16 Weeks porn/fap free as of tomorrow.

I think I am finally starting to see some gains in self confidence, communication skills etc that were 'promised' with NoFap, complimenting the skills I have had to work on now that I am over a year sober from booze and drugs. I never really felt anything immediately other than blue balls until I slept with a woman but I am certain that things are different now than about 4 months ago. I find myself realizing halfway through conversations that I am not breaking eye contact which I knew I always did -- sort of weird but also liberating in a way. I find also that without that dopamine rush I could rely on after work or whatever, knowing a porn marathon was around the corner, I have had to adapt, so I am now hitting a workout daily. I look back a couple years ago and I was drinking, jerking off, etc way too much, just melting down into a degenerate lifestyle where I was slacking off putting work into achieving goals because I knew I could get my feel-good rush artificially.

Tips: Get an app on your phone to track progress, I use one called "Since iQuit" for IPhones, it's designed for quitting smoking but whatever, a little more discrete if someone looks over my phone and sees that instead of "Quit Jacking Off App" haha. If you are reading this thread and leaning towards giving it a shot, just install the app. When you have a particularly depressing "final wank" and you know you have had enough, just type in your exact time when you 'finished the job' (Wash your hand first LOL) and then giver for a bit. Before you know it a week will have passed!

Also some people can do it in moderation, just like people can drink in moderation. I am not one of those types -- my brain chemistry is geared towards constant anxiety and depressive feelings so booze and other dopamine rushing activities like porn are just too tempting for people like me. But even if you aren't a degenerate boozehound like me, if you know deep in your heart you are making porn too big a part of your daily routine, give it a go and see what happens!

Post: #2229

Same here.

I can drink in moderation, if by moderation you mean limiting myself to a single bottle or about 4-5 drinks.

However, while I vacation I took out a fifth of cask strength whiskey in 2 nights. Was with a group of friends that was also drinking, but nobody wanted to share my fire water. I wasn't going to be driving, and I had zero hangover both nights. Most I've had to drink in a couple years, period. Unusual. Started leading to thoughts of joining the wagon again.

Worst of it was I started drinking only in groups, but started bringing wine back. And when I'm drunk, I'm horny, and me along in my place drinking wine and jerking it to camgirls was a regular occurrance. Not a pattern that leads to much other than finishing a bottle of wine and jerking it to camgirls for all of eternity.

Shameful.

So far, not tempted to slip on either.

Post: #2230

(10-26-2016 08:48 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  

(10-26-2016 03:50 PM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

(10-26-2016 02:28 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  Day 19. My nuts are actually aching.

Sign of pent up aggression. Right there with you right now bro.

It's odd. Unusual for me.

I've prided myself on having pretty good self control, all things considered. Ability to focus. Willpower over a lot of things.

Yet I would fail at this goal.

The past time I did this I avoided porn for some time, but I think around 2 weeks in I was jerking it in the shower. I cannot remember going this long, ever, without an orgasm.

I went climbing today and I reached a new level that I haven't before. Just about every day except today, I would get frustrated in a frankly pathetic way. I would try new route difficulties, find a challenge, and the negative thoughts would talk me out of pushing it. I would give up too early, without really trying. I would feel like whimpering to myself but prided myself on not giving in to such weakness.

Today was something else.

Background - I've been pushing my body pretty hard, going to the regular gym every week day, hitting my core a lot harder, and getting more reps than I've done for 3-4 years of working out. I've also lost 2 pant sizes. Back to where I was "skinnyfat" before, except my chest and shoulders are significantly bigger. Someone asked me the other day how I'd been losing weight, and I just told them I dropped a lot of carbs. I've been eating simple, easy meals of burger + veggies + fruit that takes me almost no time to make at night. 2 meals a day with ~16 hours between dinner and lunch. I've lost somewhere around 10-15 pounds depending on the day. I'm trying to do it slowly without losing much muscle, as I'm not far off now from where I want to be, bodyfat wise. 1.5-2 more pant sizes and I'm a totally flat, sixpack stomach.

So all of this going on, feeling great, I got productive frustration.

My only real comparison is back to when I was a kid, playing video games, and trying my damnedest to beat a level. I would go nuts, get frustrated as hell, but keep on doing what I could to beat the level. That carried over into my schoolwork and got me to where I am today, where I can honestly coast on a lot of solid past effort.

Anyway, I'm attacking the wall today with my frustration. I fell off? Fuck you, wall. I'm climbing up. Fell off a hold? Fuck that hold, I'm going to own it if I have to squeeze it off its mount so that I don't tumble. And on and on. I didn't get sapped of energy today. Didn't make excuses, just hit the wall harder than I had before. Attempting things that I just wouldn't have bothered before. Figuring out problems.

Angry. Controlled.

Been there. Fun but a bit scary. You radiate bull in the china shop. Buzzing like electric wires in the summer do. People can feel it. You can feel it. Powerful.

BUT it can lead to perfection spirals and self improvement brooding.

I was lucky that my gym had a speed bag. Started every session getting into with 10-15 mins on that. I'd go into the boxing room angry as shit, come out smiling.

Sound like climbing is working for you but thought I'd offer another suggestion if you want to switch it up.

Enjoy that focused, intense rage. Its a gift.

Post: #2231

Day 20. Feel mostly normal. Have a slight horniness beginning to take hold.

Post: #2232

Haha I do t remember exactly how many days it's been but I can say I have atleast 2 1/2 weeks since I've touched myself.

Still no urge to fap.

Noticed my voice is deeper .

that's about it really (so far)

Post: #2233

3 weeks.

Woke up like:

Post: #2234

I'm on day two. Already going crazy. Last night I fapped, but not to orgasm stopped before I fucked up. Christ, I'll be a certifiable pervert by Day seven, oh well.

Post: #2235

Made it through the whole day. Dressing up for Halloween fun.

Post: #2236

Day 6.

Note: on couple pages ago I said "day 4", well that failed after I wrote that! So this is second attempt.

Post: #2237

Day 22.

Feel worn out as hell today. No where near the energy I had earlier this week. Not sure if it's just because I was so physical at the gym this week, climbing more than normal, and going out last night.

And I'm getting erections really damn easily. Fisto's vegas story with the viet girl gave a me a huge boner.

Was disappointed with the quality of girls I ran into today and last night. Although, there was a cute young black cashier chick today that I flirted with after she dealt with a ridiculous customer.

Post: #2238

Hey guys, trying this again, I'm in my early 20s and this is more related to porn, I don't have problem with weak erections or whatever, it's just that I've understood some of the arguments about the negativeness of porn and frankly they sound reasonable and I should detox my brain from porn to have a healthier sexuality and appreciation of women. Probably this won't be a "no fap" run, currently one week with no porn and no fap leading to ejaculation. Not feeling too different though there is a slight horniness starting to mount. Any thoughts? I guess this is really about getting rid of porn for good, instead of other physical issues.

Edit: One thing that concerned me is the augmented horniness and how that could lead to a drop in standards. It's not so good to have your dick taking decisions for you. Might make me stick my dick in crazy or unworthy

Post: #2239

(10-29-2016 08:10 PM)LEMONed IScream Wrote:  Hey guys, trying this again, I'm in my early 20s and this is more related to porn, I don't have problem with weak erections or whatever, it's just that I've understood some of the arguments about the negativeness of porn and frankly they sound reasonable and I should detox my brain from porn to have a healthier sexuality and appreciation of women. Probably this won't be a "no fap" run, currently one week with no porn and no fap leading to ejaculation. Not feeling too different though there is a slight horniness starting to mount. Any thoughts? I guess this is really about getting rid of porn for good, instead of other physical issues.

For me it's about the increase in self control, the drop in complacency, and the aggressiveness that comes from doing without.

Post: #2240

(10-28-2016 10:35 AM)andy Wrote:  I'm on day two. Already going crazy. Last night I fapped, but not to orgasm stopped before I fucked up. Christ, I'll be a certifiable pervert by Day seven, oh well.

Yeah I wouldn't do that at all. "Edging" eventually kills my streak everytime. I end up getting far too horny and stressed out and just cave every single time I've done it.

Post: #2241

(10-29-2016 07:25 PM)philosophical_recovery Wrote:  Day 22.

Feel worn out as hell today. No where near the energy I had earlier this week. Not sure if it's just because I was so physical at the gym this week, climbing more than normal, and going out last night.

Flucuations in energy levels day to day and also week to week are normal. Progress in nofap is NON LINEAR.

Sooner or later you will enter the FLATLINE phase where your body does the real healing. This is when a lot of guys get real scared beacuse it's common to go from 5 to 30 days in a row feeling like you have the dead useless dick of a 90 year old man. During that time guys get so paranoid that they will never have another erection again that they "test" themselves with porn, erotic stories, or simply non nude sexy photos. That is where many guys cave in. Realise that the flatline period is the worst part of rebooting, but also the one where your body is doing the most inner healing from years of self abuse. The flatline lasts different amounts of time for each man but you must get through it with the knowledge that your libido will come back stronger than ever.

Also - DO NOT EDGE !

Edging is very dangerous. Even if you manage to stop yourself in time your dick will be filled with cum and thats the worst place for it to be if your not going to follow through. Also edging takes away your nofap skin glow....your head gets hot and sweaty (sometimes oily) and you have already started undoing your progress. When you feel the need to edge while in bed, lie on your back and put your fapping hand behind your back and apply pressure so you cant move it until the urge goes away. If the urge does not go away, go to the shower and apply ice cold water onto your whole head and hands. Generally cold showers are very good to stop emergency situations, but if thats not possible ice cold water on the hands and head should do the trick. DO NOT TOUCH YOUR DICK !!!

Remember - a full reboot takes a MINIMUM of 90 days...no less. Yes, 3 whole months is the minimum you need to reach to see lasting improvements.

Doing this long term is one of the most difficult thing most men will attempt in their lives....stay vigilant, stay away from triggers, block porn on your devices, and most of all if you relapse one time....do not binge. One single failure does not undo all your progress, but 3 or more failures in a row will. Dont try to achieve perfection as this is impossible, rather be like a boxer who got knocked out cold by his opponent, but instead of giving up and staying on the floor like a fucking loser, he got straight back up and kept fighting. The guy who keeps fighting despite many setbacks, is the guy who eventually wins big.

Post: #2242

What about accidental cumming while sleeping (i.e. sexy dreams)? It seems day ago I actually stopped myself from cumming in sleep with unconscious kegel exercise!

Post: #2243

(10-30-2016 02:53 AM)sterling_archer Wrote:  What about accidental cumming while sleeping (i.e. sexy dreams)? It seems day ago I actually stopped myself from cumming in sleep with unconscious kegel exercise!

That's called a "wet dream" or a "nocturnal emission".

It's NOT a relapse, you didn't cause it intentionally, and it is totally out of your control.
You don't have to "start over" if this happens.

To be honest these kind of dreams are quite normal once you quit porn and fapping, and is a sign that you are getting better as your brain is producing its own homegrown stimulation again.

Post: #2244

Yeah, wet dream, forgot how that was called in English. When it almost happened I felt like "guilty" (like relapse) but I am glad now that I don't have to start over.

Can you describe what do you mean by edging? Is that something like starting to fap but stop before cumming?

Today is btw, 7 days.

Post: #2245

(10-30-2016 04:05 AM)sterling_archer Wrote:  Yeah, wet dream, forgot how that was called in English. When it almost happened I felt like "guilty" (like relapse) but I am glad now that I don't have to start over.

Can you describe what do you mean by edging? Is that something like starting to fap but stop before cumming?

Edging is when you touch yourself and fap (masturbate), but you stop before you have an orgasm and/or release your cum (semen). Do NOT do this...it will greatly hinder your progress.

Post: #2246

I am on 7 days today and I am starting to go crazy!

Post: #2247

(10-30-2016 04:38 AM)mistertruc Wrote:  I am on 7 days today and I am starting to go crazy!

That means you are doing the right thing and it's working.....the craziness lasts about 2 to 3 days and then calms down again....it then picks up again 7 days later.

When you do nofap you realise men have "cycles" in a similar way to women. Women have almost zero libido just before and during their periods (menstruations) and then go back to extreme arrousal and horniness (before and during ovulation).

Post: #2248

Day 39 no/nf. Last time I made it 112 days. Haven't watched pirn since january but I keep thinking about it from time to time.

10+ years of addiction is hard to overcome.

Gotta stay strong.

Post: #2249

Day 23

Ginormous morning wood after dreaming of my first bang and girlfriend back in highschool. It felt too real and similar to how it actually went down.



Was an enormous effort not to touch my dick. Most difficult moment by far.

Post: #2250

(10-30-2016 05:04 AM)Mercenary Wrote:  That means you are doing the right thing and it's working.....the craziness lasts about 2 to 3 days and then calms down again....it then picks up again 7 days later.

When you do nofap you realise men have "cycles" in a similar way to women. Women have almost zero libido just before and during their periods (menstruations) and then go back to extreme arrousal and horniness (before and during ovulation).

Interesting as in this week I have seldom been horny, more like zero libido you described.
What did you say, 30 days until we can see some changes on body? Is it true that voice becomes deeper? I have a slightly higher voice which sounds a tad bit unmanly.