(01-24-2014 11:48 AM)Frontenac Wrote:  You: I wrote the book on it. I can give you some pointers, but maybe you're too far gone.

Actually, you went too far over here.

"I wrote a book on it."
Let her ask the questions, let her do the probing......then you dare her.
You jumped the gun here.

Brevity is the soul of wit. When in doubt keep texts short.

Eventually you'll get the bait-and-suckerpunch down.

Ugh double post.

Redonion -- "alright", "okay" "ah" "..." "Yaay. (+yawning smiley)". Should allwork fine

Worked wonders. Thank you, sir.

Been getting this one alot lately from new girls and I dont really know what the best answer would be:

What are you looking for?

(02-01-2014 12:12 AM)James 2013 Wrote:  Been getting this one alot lately from new girls and I dont really know what the best answer would be:

What are you looking for?

waldo, have you seen him?

Ok what about this variant:

what do you want from me?

Background story...met this 23 year old and she's spent the night at my place a couple of times, had drinks each time, try to escalate for the bang but getting denied. She just recently broke up with her ex too....was bantering back and forth thru text yesterday mentioning I just had a new tv stand delivered. She replies back this morning:

Her: how come the tv stand was so heavy

I didn't answer back and she texts again this afternoon...

Her: why would you ever want to date a drunk? that sounds like bad news from the get go. (she's referring to how we are always drinking when we hang out)

I know she's shit testing but I have no idea where to go with this.

Ignore.. or, I don't date drunks

@James2013:

Answers this exact text; http://www.returnofkings.com/28049/the-5...nd-to-them

(02-01-2014 09:52 PM)carouge Wrote:  Ignore.. or, I don't date drunks

Right on...I just ignored it.

She texts again tonight: "why don't you answer jerk"

Ok how about this one:

What do you do

(02-02-2014 03:05 AM)James 2013 Wrote:  Ok how about this one:

What do you do

Say you work in finance or you're a doc/attorney.

What do you do?

If she is younger
Smh..don't tell me you're one of those girls lol

Older working-girl type
Really? You didn't seem like one if those girls


Or just tell her what you do. What's the big deal?

Girl from a couple years back (yes, a couple years) who I last talked to in October emails me Friday morning around 1am saying:

"It's been a long day and I'm a little drunk I need to know why not me"

Some other info:
She's been dating a guy, or at least when I last talked to her, for a while. She made sure to regularly bring that up whenever we spoke. I can't tell obviously if they're still together, but based on this she's still thinking about me even though we haven't banged since fall 2011 (!!!).

Thoughts on how to respond? I have some ideas but I thought I'd throw it out there for you gentlemen.

(02-08-2014 12:54 PM)Frontenac Wrote:  Girl from a couple years back (yes, a couple years) who I last talked to in October emails me Friday morning around 1am saying:

"It's been a long day and I'm a little drunk I need to know why not me"

Some other info:
She's been dating a guy, or at least when I last talked to her, for a while. She made sure to regularly bring that up whenever we spoke. I can't tell obviously if they're still together, but based on this she's still thinking about me even though we haven't banged since fall 2011 (!!!).

Thoughts on how to respond? I have some ideas but I thought I'd throw it out there for you gentlemen.

Would 'Delete' be a feasible option?

(02-08-2014 12:54 PM)Frontenac Wrote:  Girl from a couple years back (yes, a couple years) who I last talked to in October emails me Friday morning around 1am saying:

"It's been a long day and I'm a little drunk I need to know why not me"

Some other info:
She's been dating a guy, or at least when I last talked to her, for a while. She made sure to regularly bring that up whenever we spoke. I can't tell obviously if they're still together, but based on this she's still thinking about me even though we haven't banged since fall 2011 (!!!).

Thoughts on how to respond? I have some ideas but I thought I'd throw it out there for you gentlemen.

The worst torture one can put on a woman is never telling them the reason why you dumped them. It drives them insane, because it causes them to be self-reflective which is the last thing they want.

When she finally gets a reason for the breakup then she cleverly negates your reasoning, and then rationalizes her own behavior. In essence, she would say something like, "Well that may be so, but look at you, who are you to say such and such, in fact you're the bad one and I'm really ok!"

This is what she wants from you. To let her off the hook from having to see her own fault.

While never giving her a reason is torturing her, paradoxically it's really the best thing you can do for her because it gives her the "opportunity" to know something about herself.

Frontenac, I think you have got to ignore that text.

Thanks for the responses, guys.

I thought it was pretty strange to get, and my spidey-sense was going off more and more when I thought about it. She was always more unstable than most girls I've met, and always seemed like the type who'd pull some crazy desperate shit (eg. Saying she's on the pill when she might not be, etc.). I guess we all have to watch out for landmines.

I'm going to ignore, but I may post a follow-up if there's any developments.

Thanks again gentleman. Enjoy your Saturday.

(02-08-2014 05:18 PM)Frontenac Wrote:  Thanks for the responses, guys.

I thought it was pretty strange to get, and my spidey-sense was going off more and more when I thought about it. She was always more unstable than most girls I've met, and always seemed like the type who'd pull some crazy desperate shit (eg. Saying she's on the pill when she might not be, etc.). I guess we all have to watch out for landmines.

I'm going to ignore, but I may post a follow-up if there's any developments.

Thanks again gentleman. Enjoy your Saturday.

If she pesters you more about it and why you haven't responded, you could say something like, "I didn't reply because I don't really know the specific reasons. My gut said there wasn't a future there so I didn't want to waste your time or mine."

Pof message:
After a few random messages
Her: I've been on this site too long
Me: don't ditch it until we talk some more
Her ok
Her 20 min later....what do you want to know or why did you want to talk to me
Her next day after I didn't respond: ?

so now what's my best play
..hi I figure we'll talk more in person

hi how was your weekend

the things that I want to know come out naturally in conversation

(02-10-2014 08:22 PM)pro14 Wrote:  Pof message:
After a few random messages
Her: I've been on this site too long
Me: don't ditch it until we talk some more
Her ok
Her 20 min later....what do you want to know or why did you want to talk to me
Her next day after I didn't respond: ?

so now what's my best play
..hi I figure we'll talk more in person

hi how was your weekend

the things that I want to know come out naturally in conversation

you should have closed for her number as soon as she said she's been on the site too long...

(02-10-2014 08:22 PM)pro14 Wrote:  Pof message:
After a few random messages
Her: I've been on this site too long
Me: don't ditch it until we talk some more
Her ok
Her 20 min later....what do you want to know or why did you want to talk to me
Her next day after I didn't respond: ?

so now what's my best play
..hi I figure we'll talk more in person

hi how was your weekend

the things that I want to know come out naturally in conversation

"I wanted to find out if you can cook (*insert specific ethnic food)...."

"I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you" (corny, yes. But lightly evade the topic and move on to setting up a meeting).

"do you have a cat?"

"haaiiiiiiii. goood mornings. what is?"

"gimme your number. I'll call."

"yes. what zodiac sign are you?"

I've come to realize recently that my biggest weakness is text game. Sometimes I'm a champ and others I'm total ballz. Here's an exchange I'm stuck on. She seemed super into me when we met. Real touchy feely, waved to me a bunch as she walked away, said "I don't think you'll really text me," all kinds of good indicators. I wanted to pull her then and there, but she was babysitting a super drunk friend. Now I'm stuck in SMS purgatory. I wish fucking Japanese girls would answer the damn phone.

Here's the exchange (this is all in Japanese, by the way)

Me: Hi, Misaki. Look I'm texting you
Her: Ah! Thanks! Lol. I didn't think it would come lol.
Me: You like Mexican?
Her: I don't actually know... :/ Will you teach me your real name? (I lied the first time I told her)
Me: You mean you forgot, right? ;P
Her: I'm sorry, but it was really unclear at the end! Lol. But I remember the story about your grandfather
Me: Ok... Skotch. I wanna go barhopping this week. You down?
Her: Ok! I'll remember What's bar hopping? Does this mean you're asking me out? Lol
Me: Yes I am. We'll do drinks, tapas, desert, drinks all at different places.
Her: Ok, but... Maybe our free days won't line up. :/ I'm not a student... :|

I donno how to proceed here. This is a pretty good deflection. Any ideas? I've been closing like Mariano Rivera lately, but if a girl sucks me into texting land before I meet her, I can't get to that point...

You're too eager and seeking her approval by trying to win her.

Cut to the chase:

You: I'm going to XYZ bar on Friday. Join me for a drink.

Her: blah blah blah our schedules might not line up.

You: You're a big girl, I'm sure you can work it out.

The moment you start throwing out texts trying to win her approval you're dead in the water. Girls sense thirst a mile away.

When she asked the "so this means you're asking me out?" Text, best response would be to ignore and just state what the plan is.

I've noticed asian girls in La pull this a lot. I believe it's for their ego and to tell their friends they were "asked on a date". Regardless it's petty silliness on their part. She can call it what she wants but by agreeing and texting "Yes, I am", you're falling into her Frame.