Post: #1401

Ah, sometimes this forum makes me feel old. What are you guys going to do when you retire? Is it just me or doesn't retirement conjure up images of retirement homes and moving to Florida, or northern New South Wales in my case and playing golf.

I plan to be an active part of the world and work and make money till the day I die, talk of retirement to me sounds like you are no longer moving forward. What will be your purpose in life when you retire?

I cant think of a faster turn off for younger women when they ask you what you do and you tell them your retired.

If you guys are talking about actively managing investments, property and business and taking it a bit more easy then Im all with you on that.

Post: #1402

^ I have used the semi-retired line a few times.

The reaction was favourable, set their little minds into overdrive.

Post: #1403

(09-20-2016 09:27 AM)Rudeman Wrote:  

(09-20-2016 08:57 AM)Caractacus Potts Wrote:  Ideally I would like to retire in 10 years or less with 5 condos fully paid for. That should bring in $10K/mos. My pension- if it still exists- should bring in another $65-$70K.

Thoughts?

I'm a big fan of real estate investing for financial freedom. In my experience, condos don't provide the best ROI for investing in real estate. Of course, your market may be completely different than mine.

I would suggest looking at other real estate investments such as single family homes in your area Do some provide better ROI's? In other words, invest in the best ROI real estate investments, not just the one you are familiar with (your condo building). Also, is your area the best to be investing in? If you are putting a ton of money into real estate investing, why not pick the city or town with the best ROI prospects.

You also want to look at leverage. If you can retire in 10 years with 5 condos paid off, why not retire in 10 years (or less) with 10 condos 50% paid off? Which one is going to give you more cash flow and appreciation? It's definitely nice to not be leveraged up with debt in retirement. But if you've bought right, 50% L-T-V plus your pension income should be very comfortable for you.

If you are looking to put a major part of your net worth into investment real estate, do some research now on how to maximize that. For example, you are obviously looking to invest to maximize monthly cash flow in retirement - but appreciation actually makes up a greater part of your ROI than cash flow. So you don't won't to be myopic and just focus on cash flow. There are ways you can change the appreciation for cash flow, and it has better tax consequences too.

Out of curiosity, how much does a condo that rents for $2k/mo cost in your area?

I have thought about single family homes. I will get to them in a second. First, let's cover my reason for choosing condos.

My building is two blocks from the picturesque front gate of an Ivy League school. It is two blocks from the train station. It is three blocks from restaurants, bars and shopping. I rented it out for 10 years and always had multiple people want it.

There are 26 units in my building. The most recent one sold last year for around $200K. The building was built in 1958 so it doesn't have the vintage charm of other buildings in the area built at the turn of the century.

Neither is it brand new so it can't offer high end finishes. Other condos in the area are more than twice what mine cost and most homeowners associations do not allow for rentals.

So why buy here?

There are a number of reasons.

1. Location
2. I am on the condo board.
3. Investors cannot buy to rent out. If you buy one you have to live in it for two years before you can rent it.
4. The other condo members have the right of first refusal to purchase a unit if someone wants to sell.

In the years that my divorce was dragging out three units were sold. One belonged to the mother in law of an electrician friend. He asked me if I wanted to buy it since she was going into a nursing home.

They wanted to sell quick. He said I could have it for $170,000. Unfortunately I could not take advantage of it.

I am very familiar with student housing. I owned multiple properties for years; two flat, three flat, SFH and condos. The condos were the least amount of headaches. At one point I had 21 tenants spread across the properties. On paper I made money when I sold the buildings but when you factor in my time spent cleaning, repairing, etc I was working for peanuts.

The university close by is an Ivy League school that charges $52,000 tuition per year. Not counting books, housing, etc. Many of the kids that attend are from wealthy families and money is not the major concern. I remember pulling up to do work on my three flat and parked out front was a Hummer, Lexus SUV, Porsche Carrera, etc. These are college students!

I figure if the economy hits the skids again there will be even more parents who want their kids to go here.

There is a brand new apartment complex a mile away from me. We call it the two towers. Doorman in the front. Workout facility including an indoor basketball court! Rooftop (16th floor) party deck, etc, etc. A three bedroom is renting for $3800/mos.

I have the location and convenience factor on my side.

Single Family Homes

I recently started giving more thoughts to buying one because my older daughter has asked how much longer we are going to live in the condo. Her mother is renting a sfh in the best school district in the state. The house is literally across the street from the best high school in the state. She is paying $4400/mos rent!

Down the street from my ex a house sold in June for just shy of $1,000,000. The house wasn't anything special. There are a fair number of $800,000 - $1,000,000 homes in the area. They all need work. People are paying that for the school district.

The second best school district in the state is 15-20 minute ride from where I am at now. I saw a house online for sale in the district for $300,000. It had recently been reduced. I could tell by the pictures that the house needed everything; including roof.

I know several realtors buy in those areas for themelves. They in turn rent them out to people who want their kids in those school districts.

I need more money to play in that arena. I can see how it may be easier since I most likely won't have the tenant turnover. Plus they probably won't be as hard on the property as college kids. I am going to explore the idea some more.

I have read some of the investing threads. What I really want to focus on here is what are the most tax advantageous things I can do right now to set myself up for retirement?

Mods, should we make this a separate thread?

Maybe I will buy condos in Medellin and in the Phillipines and rent them to RVFers!

Post: #1404

Was thinking of a little jaunt back to my old stomping grounds, Eastern Europe and Spain, where I lived for 10 years. Now I have more "semi-retired" money, but I'm older.

Nevertheless , I have more gusto for the cold approach, with all the techniques I have learned online. When I was living there it was easy bar game and social circle.

In the meantime, Stateside, was thinking of putting up an ad for a sugar daddy-type arrangement. As I never had kids, my financial resources could be put to use for my extended bachelorhood. Not looking exactly for a traditional gold digger, as I could not afford that; but I could devote some money to a "mutually beneficial" relationship.

Post: #1405

Some potent info within these pages. Been checking out the ani-aging thread too, and I have to say a lot of guys have the right attitude. Being in my mid-40's, I'm working on strategies to keep myself feeling younger. My true passions have always been music and athletics, so I have rededicated myself them. I am trying to up my mentoring game as well. It's true that keeping your mind engaged goes a long way in maintaining your sharpness. One of my tricks is continue to seek out people/places who will challenge some of my long held beliefs in hopes that I will not only learn but perhaps even change my perspective. This year alone I've grown in some aspects as a man, and as a human being. Not suprisingly, some of the posts I read in various threads as part of this community have affected the way I do some things.

Even though I may not openly comment or reply, I'm reading, absorbing and applying them daily.

Post: #1406

(09-20-2016 12:04 PM)MY DETROIT PLAYAS Wrote:  Some potent info within these pages. Been checking out the ani-aging thread too, and I have to say a lot of guys have the right attitude. Being in my mid-40's, I'm working on strategies to keep myself feeling younger. My true passions have always been music and athletics, so I have rededicated myself them. I am trying to up my mentoring game as well. It's true that keeping your mind engaged goes a long way in maintaining your sharpness. One of my tricks is continue to seek out people/places who will challenge some of my long held beliefs in hopes that I will not only learn but perhaps even change my perspective. This year alone I've grown in some aspects as a man, and as a human being. Not suprisingly, some of the posts I read in various threads as part of this community have affected the way I do some things.

Even though I may not openly comment or reply, I'm reading, absorbing and applying them daily.

The same goes for me. I began teaching at the Community College nearby and really enjoy it. This is only the second semester I am teaching but the department head has already asked me how many classes I want to teach next semester!

It has been an eye opening experience teaching. I never realized how much wisdom/experience I have gained over the years. When I talk to some of the students about some relatively innocuous things they look at me and I realize it is the first time they are ever hearing such things.

For instance, my 20 year old plate (different school) was having problems with getting her classes. I told her to print up the email that was favorable to her and ignore the one that declined her requests. I told her to go in and act like she never got the second.

I told her when you are in the office they will pull it up and see that you were declined and instructed to contact so and so to set up a time for an appointment. If she did that all of the classes that she needed would have been filled.

I told her to say "since I am here now what can we do?" It worked. The course counselor met with her then rather than her having to wait a week. She was so excited after she thought she would have to spend another semester there to get those classes.

If she were not having sex with me she would not known to do this and it would have cost her at least another semester and thousands of dollars. I am sending good karma out to the universe!

Post: #1407

As guys our age, I think we have a responsibility to pay it forward

In your case, it has certain fringe benefits haha

Post: #1408

(09-20-2016 12:21 PM)Caractacus Potts Wrote:  

(09-20-2016 12:04 PM)MY DETROIT PLAYAS Wrote:  

The same goes for me. I began teaching at the Community College nearby and really enjoy it. This is only the second semester I am teaching but the department head has already asked me how many classes I want to teach next semester!

It has been an eye opening experience teaching. I never realized how much wisdom/experience I have gained over the years. When I talk to some of the students about some relatively innocuous things they look at me and I realize it is the first time they are ever hearing such things.

That's it right there. A great thing to hear, and something we forget so often. When you're on a train moving forward, you don't feel the forward movement. And then when you're around other people you just realize, "Wow...you've come a long way."

As I see it, it's still really important to be going abroad as often as you can as you get older. Aging in the US can be cruel for single guys, no matter how good you look. Always have to have that escape plan in place, so that when the time comes you can "pull up chalks" and dust off.

.

Post: #1409

(09-20-2016 08:57 AM)Caractacus Potts Wrote:  I have a question for our older members who are divorced: how long did it take you to recover financially?

A quick background: I am 45 years old and divorced with two girls. The ex got custody and gets child support. I have seven more years of paying child support. It is not hyperbole for me to say the divorce and it's aftermath have cost me in excess of $1 million.
snip
Ideally I would like to retire in 10 years or less with 5 condos fully paid for. That should bring in $10K/mos. My pension- if it still exists- should bring in another $65-$70K.

Thoughts?

Some questions then I have some ideas. Where does your income come from now? Are you locked into your location because of the child visitation schedule?

My answer to your original question is that I got divorced relatively cleanly and it did not take any time at all to recover financially. I did make some small mistakes, mostly traveling and spending on silly things I didn't need. Fortunately I refused to pay alimony and she did not press for it. We had a mediator so no lawyer expense. The relative goodwill we tried to maintain for the sake of coparenting the kids paid off in some ways financially.

I like your idea of rentals in good locations to University kids. A good friend is a millionaire on paper with 6 single family homes subdivided into rentals. He has an ironclad lease agreement for them that favors the landlord heavily.

Post: #1410

(09-20-2016 11:55 AM)Caractacus Potts Wrote:  

(09-20-2016 09:27 AM)Rudeman Wrote:  

(09-20-2016 08:57 AM)Caractacus Potts Wrote:  Ideally I would like to retire in 10 years or less with 5 condos fully paid for. That should bring in $10K/mos. My pension- if it still exists- should bring in another $65-$70K.

Thoughts?

I'm a big fan of real estate investing for financial freedom. In my experience, condos don't provide the best ROI for investing in real estate. Of course, your market may be completely different than mine.

I would suggest looking at other real estate investments such as single family homes in your area Do some provide better ROI's? In other words, invest in the best ROI real estate investments, not just the one you are familiar with (your condo building). Also, is your area the best to be investing in? If you are putting a ton of money into real estate investing, why not pick the city or town with the best ROI prospects.

You also want to look at leverage. If you can retire in 10 years with 5 condos paid off, why not retire in 10 years (or less) with 10 condos 50% paid off? Which one is going to give you more cash flow and appreciation? It's definitely nice to not be leveraged up with debt in retirement. But if you've bought right, 50% L-T-V plus your pension income should be very comfortable for you.

If you are looking to put a major part of your net worth into investment real estate, do some research now on how to maximize that. For example, you are obviously looking to invest to maximize monthly cash flow in retirement - but appreciation actually makes up a greater part of your ROI than cash flow. So you don't won't to be myopic and just focus on cash flow. There are ways you can change the appreciation for cash flow, and it has better tax consequences too.

Out of curiosity, how much does a condo that rents for $2k/mo cost in your area?

I have thought about single family homes. I will get to them in a second. First, let's cover my reason for choosing condos.

My building is two blocks from the picturesque front gate of an Ivy League school. It is two blocks from the train station. It is three blocks from restaurants, bars and shopping. I rented it out for 10 years and always had multiple people want it.

There are 26 units in my building. The most recent one sold last year for around $200K. The building was built in 1958 so it doesn't have the vintage charm of other buildings in the area built at the turn of the century.

Neither is it brand new so it can't offer high end finishes. Other condos in the area are more than twice what mine cost and most homeowners associations do not allow for rentals.

So why buy here?

There are a number of reasons.

1. Location
2. I am on the condo board.
3. Investors cannot buy to rent out. If you buy one you have to live in it for two years before you can rent it.
4. The other condo members have the right of first refusal to purchase a unit if someone wants to sell.

In the years that my divorce was dragging out three units were sold. One belonged to the mother in law of an electrician friend. He asked me if I wanted to buy it since she was going into a nursing home.

They wanted to sell quick. He said I could have it for $170,000. Unfortunately I could not take advantage of it.

I am very familiar with student housing. I owned multiple properties for years; two flat, three flat, SFH and condos. The condos were the least amount of headaches. At one point I had 21 tenants spread across the properties. On paper I made money when I sold the buildings but when you factor in my time spent cleaning, repairing, etc I was working for peanuts.

The university close by is an Ivy League school that charges $52,000 tuition per year. Not counting books, housing, etc. Many of the kids that attend are from wealthy families and money is not the major concern. I remember pulling up to do work on my three flat and parked out front was a Hummer, Lexus SUV, Porsche Carrera, etc. These are college students!

I figure if the economy hits the skids again there will be even more parents who want their kids to go here.

There is a brand new apartment complex a mile away from me. We call it the two towers. Doorman in the front. Workout facility including an indoor basketball court! Rooftop (16th floor) party deck, etc, etc. A three bedroom is renting for $3800/mos.

I have the location and convenience factor on my side.

Single Family Homes

I recently started giving more thoughts to buying one because my older daughter has asked how much longer we are going to live in the condo. Her mother is renting a sfh in the best school district in the state. The house is literally across the street from the best high school in the state. She is paying $4400/mos rent!

Down the street from my ex a house sold in June for just shy of $1,000,000. The house wasn't anything special. There are a fair number of $800,000 - $1,000,000 homes in the area. They all need work. People are paying that for the school district.

The second best school district in the state is 15-20 minute ride from where I am at now. I saw a house online for sale in the district for $300,000. It had recently been reduced. I could tell by the pictures that the house needed everything; including roof.

I know several realtors buy in those areas for themelves. They in turn rent them out to people who want their kids in those school districts.

I need more money to play in that arena. I can see how it may be easier since I most likely won't have the tenant turnover. Plus they probably won't be as hard on the property as college kids. I am going to explore the idea some more.

I have read some of the investing threads. What I really want to focus on here is what are the most tax advantageous things I can do right now to set myself up for retirement?

Mods, should we make this a separate thread?

Maybe I will buy condos in Medellin and in the Phillipines and rent them to RVFers!

This thread has really picked up. I can see why you would want to invest in these condos, despite the fact that condos are generally not the best investment.

What do you want to be doing and where would you like to live in ten years?

I imagine the prospects for young, attractive women to be pretty bleak for most men 50 plus living in the US. I am thinking of relocating to Colombia or DR in 10-15 years. My dating and social life would be significantly better. I would also be a short plane ride away to visit my family or do some short-term job contracts.

Post: #1411

I have to admit I have learned several things from dating college girls.

Post: #1412

Engineer, yes I am tied to the area because of visitation arrangements as well as my job. I only started teaching at the Community College last year but if I keep it up by the time I retire I will have 8 years of teaching experience. I may look into getting my TEFL/TESL certification. I know there are some threads on the forum about teaching English abroad.

Dantes asked "What do you want to be doing and where would you like to live in ten years?"

And therein lies the rub, as the bard said. lol I need to think about this some more. I think Doc Holliday and Ball Don't Lie have the right idea. Live most of the year outside the US and come back to visit during the summer months.

I was only half joking about buying a condo in Colombia or the Phillipines. I think it would be a viable business to rent to RVFers in many of the cities that are discussed in the data sheets here. I imagine property would be much cheaper in second and third tier cities as well.

How about you guys? Where do you want to be and want do you want to be doing in 10 years? What are you doing to advance your dreams?

Before I forget can someone explain to me or direct me to the thread that explains how to cut snippets from others' posts? I am sure many here get tired of reading my long walls of text that are responses from other posters.

Also, what is the button with the green + symbol between Reply and Report do/mean?

CP

Post: #1413

For me in 10 yrs? I'll still be working, running my business, accumulating as much cash as possible and most likely should have most of my business debt gone by then (my business required serious capital investment to start up). I also plan to travel extensively, particularly to some of these "pussy paradises" along with creating an extensive social network here at home. Definitely want to find some way of paying it forward as MDP said, mentoring some younger guys and gals in some capacity. Physically, staying fit and looking younger than my actual age (so far so good on that front). So much stuff left to do in this life, I feel so excited that the best days of my life are ahead. And of course, last but not least, slamming as many vaginas as possible by whatever means necessary before I finally croke. After all, the man who dies with the most pussies slammed wins right?

Post: #1414

Please understand, I can't keep this here. Thanks guys.

Post: #1415

I have a chronic neurological illness, which hinders my life a fair bit, and my "retirement plan" currently is to end myself at some point, unless nature does it for me before that. Or a cure comes, but I'm not keeping my hopes high.

I don't have much income, have limited energy to do things, but I do have a high libido. That's a bitchy equation.

Post: #1416

(09-20-2016 01:27 PM)Quintus Curtius Wrote:  

(09-20-2016 12:21 PM)Caractacus Potts Wrote:  

(09-20-2016 12:04 PM)MY DETROIT PLAYAS Wrote:  

The same goes for me. I began teaching at the Community College nearby and really enjoy it. This is only the second semester I am teaching but the department head has already asked me how many classes I want to teach next semester!

It has been an eye opening experience teaching. I never realized how much wisdom/experience I have gained over the years. When I talk to some of the students about some relatively innocuous things they look at me and I realize it is the first time they are ever hearing such things.

That's it right there. A great thing to hear, and something we forget so often. When you're on a train moving forward, you don't feel the forward movement. And then when you're around other people you just realize, "Wow...you've come a long way."

As I see it, it's still really important to be going abroad as often as you can as you get older. Aging in the US can be cruel for single guys, no matter how good you look. Always have to have that escape plan in place, so that when the time comes you can "pull up chalks" and dust off.

.

That is why I like doing the executive coaching in Taiwan. Clients greatly appreciate the insight and techniques I've gained from decades of work and I am out of the toxic US culture.

Post: #1417

(09-21-2016 12:18 AM)HungJohnson69 Wrote:  I have a chronic neurological illness, which hinders my life a fair bit, and my "retirement plan" currently is to end myself at some point, unless nature does it for me before that. Or a cure comes, but I'm not keeping my hopes high.

I don't have much income, have limited energy to do things, but I do have a high libido. That's a bitchy equation.

It is quite common that we do not want to think about death, but some situations force us to think about death, and possibly this 40+ thread is as good as any place to consider that death sometimes could come prematurely.

I have had injuries and even forms of illness - depending on how you look at the matter, that debilitated me for considerable periods of time, and even caused me to wonder how such a seemingly little thing can cause so much life disruption.

I can imagine that if you know that there is little to no recovery and limitations in the extent of recovery, then perspective about everything is going to be changed in a large number of ways.

Actually, I think that when I was in my 20s and 30s, I gave very little thought to death, but then if you think about the reality of statistics, 40 puts us at more than half way done with life if we are average. I know that when I had a severe illness, I was considering why I had not written a will and I had put that as a high priority, and I was thinking that I had only a few years left, but then I recovered.. so back to thinking about life's enjoyment, or at least attempting to do so.

Post: #1418

Anyone 40+ here tried Tinder?
Doesn't it post on your FB profile or something?

Post: #1419

(09-21-2016 10:25 AM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  Actually, I think that when I was in my 20s and 30s, I gave very little thought to death, but then if you think about the reality of statistics, 40 puts us at more than half way done with life if we are average. I know that when I had a severe illness, I was considering why I had not written a will and I had put that as a high priority, and I was thinking that I had only a few years left, but then I recovered.. so back to thinking about life's enjoyment, or at least attempting to do so.

I think that it is common for death to become more realistic when one is around 40. That is what happened for me. 50 even more so. I have used that to make my life better. More attention to health; I feel better now than I have ever felt. More attention to enjoying life (but balancing with preparing for the future now that it is clearer that I likely won't always be in such good health). Realizing I was really going to die someday got me on a path to seizing the day and not just drifting through my personal time while being a workaholic. All of that led me down a road that got me overseas where I could seek adventure and bang hotter women again, speaking of banging hot women.

There is a Buddhist saying that goes something like - treat your body as though you'll live forever. Treat your soul as though you will die tomorrow. I don't think you can fully appreciate that idea when you are young and the future seems like a limitless path.

Post: #1420

I think more about death since I have attended more funerals than weddings as of late.

I have had more than a few friends who have died from illness, so the thought of death does run through your mind.

I also think about having kids, once you realize you won't live forever then you want to create something that will carry on your "legacy". Creating life is the opposite of dying, a bit morbid I know!

People may laugh at women who crave children at a certain age, but men go through the same thing at some point. I will say there is some vanity on my part, I want a little Rudebwoy to mold and create.

Post: #1421

So, I had an appointment with a financial planner the other day. He told me that the only real option I had was maxing out my 457(b) at work - $18,000/yr.

I have no debt aside from the mortgage on the condo (~$62,000). No student loans. No credit card debt. I only have three more payments to the ex-scumbags, er, attorneys.

I was surprised to hear him say I was ineligible to put any money into my ROTH IRA or to open a traditional IRA. He told me that my income precludes me from contributing to those and can only stick it into a checking/savings account or open a taxable trading account. Anybody here know if that is correct?

Another option is to buy more property or open a business to shelter money. I am looking at both of those.

Post: #1422

(09-23-2016 09:27 PM)Caractacus Potts Wrote:  So, I had an appointment with a financial planner the other day. He told me that the only real option I had was maxing out my 457(b) at work - $18,000/yr.

I have no debt aside from the mortgage on the condo (~$62,000). No student loans. No credit card debt. I only have three more payments to the ex-scumbags, er, attorneys.

I was surprised to hear him say I was ineligible to put any money into my ROTH IRA or to open a traditional IRA. He told me that my income precludes me from contributing to those and can only stick it into a checking/savings account or open a taxable trading account. Anybody here know if that is correct?

Another option is to buy more property or open a business to shelter money. I am looking at both of those.

You can open a traditional IRA, anyone can do that regardless of income, the Roth begins to fade out at 116K and fades out completely at 133K (this is adjusted gross income). You could also open a college 529 plan for your kids and you'll get a deduction on your state taxes and the growth is not taxed on your federal taxes.

https://www.irs.gov/retirement-plans/amo...e-for-2015

Post: #1423

(07-13-2012 03:49 PM)dirtman Wrote:  I'm 37, so not quite at 40 but rounding the corner.

Cool Dirtman, come back when you meet the criteria for the thread.

Post: #1424

Just finished my first week in a new job where my new Boss and his director are actually respectful of my deep diving and nuke boat driving experiences and ask random questions and my director even apologetically said he had wished he had the Navy Adventure Experience and I in my wise old age said I am grateful he has become a world class University Cyber Security Director... who I can now learn from now (at the grey haired phase of my career). Amazing how a great job can make you feel better about life - get up at 5AM to two loud alarm clocks for a 1.5 hour Coach Bus and T rides to the campus - am making a solid 6 figures plus with full benefits except LTD does not kick in until after a 2 year hold period... I am allowed two classes per semester first at 100% tuition reimbursed and 2nd at 90%. Interesting that the ethereal powers (God, Zeus Jupiter, or in my case Neptune) fucks with your entire life then in the Autumn of your years gives you the wishes fulfilled when you were at sea poking holes in the ocean wishing for so long agao. Only now you need viagra to enjoy what was automatic and wasted at 22.

I also have a benefit of 50% tuition paid for "dependents" of which I have none... so thinking about gaming a young hottie (place is crawling with them) who wants to go to Grad School (I get 50% off full tuition costs for deps) and use my Red Pill neomasculine game skills and basically flip the script. Say I am an old school investor and if i invest in anything - including you - I need to know my TCO and ROI before I invest in anything.

My idea is to invest in a grad degree that has high earnings probabilities and then put her to work to take care of me in my older age - unfortunately will need a marriage certificate which I have spent a lifetime avoiding and have NO baggage... will of course have a pre and post nup agreements and do the Perot Systems thing if I invest in you for two you years you have to provide an ROI.

Of course this is ground zero of liberal academic SJW Cultural Marxist Feminism... still have to take my mandatory sexual harassment training and drink the kool aid on-boarding trainings...

This will be tough because I have become a dedicated Gap surfer in just one week... American Eagle Jeans gap, spandex black leggings gap, shorts gap, asian, caucasian, middle eastern, latino and blam gap - front gap coming at you and snap gap walking away... and every so often wealthy Yoga Pants wearing epic HB9 gap.

Be careful what you wish for...

Damn the Gods are some ironic muthas.

In the mean time surfing eventbrite for benefit events - one coming up called the purple party - need to buy a purple pocket square as you need to wear something purple - to benefit the pediatrics department at a local Med Ctr... should be crawling with ovulating fertile targets of interest... updates to come of this new Deep diver and once upon a time hard driver's (mis)adventures LOL.

Post: #1425

I usually get introspective in these moments after I over-invest in a failed venture, i.e. business, job, GF, new friends that dont work out, etc. Recently it was several things; mom going into a nursing home, volatile start up environment I am in, ending an LTR that started off good and turned bad.

In reality, at 40, if I keep everything on the rails, Im fine. Meaning if I minimize and remove drama from my life, I am happier, earn more money, work harder, more focused, more in shape, and doing just better overall. And removing drama means no LTR. The LTR wrecks my life. Its happened every time now since my marriage. Over-investing in every LTR has resulted in heartache, over spending and over investing in something that doesn't work, after it should have ended. At the end I am left to rebuild, as is the phase I am in now.

Work drama is different. The drama with work is the cost of doing business. If I am making bets on new/risky ventures, drama is the result. I have to go all in, every time, for the ultimate pay off. And I enjoy this, to me its the essence of life. Over-investing in work usually pays off for me. Either as an employee, or owner. At this stage, getting farther quicker is my game plan. Be it all out work, or entrepreneurship.

So if I am honest with myself, and under control, my best shot at success in life now is to minimize or eliminate the drama with LTR's. To quit over-investing in women. That when I am getting into one, I avoid or bail out completely. That I don't romance these girls anymore. One of my biggest rewards in game was getting a girl to tell me she loved me. Every LTR I have had, she has told me that first. Doing that dance has always been the ride. Im not sure I even care anymore if all it does is make them end up hating me. Getting them is easy. Light years easier now with a 1000 approaches under my belt. But keeping them is impossible, whether its 6 months, 1 year or 10 years.

At this age I am not sure if I do the work it will take to get and keep an LTR. Its what I would have to do, to put forth the effort. Ending this recent LTR has put me in a funk that is hard to break. Some days are up, some are down. Over-investing in a girl 12 years my junior got me here. Replacing what I felt for her isnt so easy, with new, more attractive girls than her. But its not hard to get new girls in my life. I just had mind blowing sex with a new one this week. I know more and more successful wealthy guys over 40 now who say love is a sham, pump them and dump them, and focus on yourself. Still torn as to whether thats true or not.