Post: #1

What kind of story would you create if during a date a girl asks you about your previous partners...if you never had any?

Post: #2

What to avoid:








Tom Leykis knows what to do in this situation and sums it up here:

Post: #3

Rule #1, you shouldn't be talking about past relationships on dates. Ever.

If you need to say something, just repeat the female line "I've dated around but now I'm looking for something special."

Post: #4

Lie like you title says. Be vague. "I've had some good relationships that just didn't work out, our lives went in different directions."

Practice white-lying and you will get better at it like anything else. The first 5 times on dates it will feel strange and like she will somehow know you are lying. She won't. By the 15th time you are lying it won't be about being a virgin because you won't be one anymore.

The lie will be about where you were last night (banging another chick).

Get used to it.

Post: #5

Personal opinion is that if you're a virgin at age 30 there's a reason for it, so whatever you're doing wrong, I'd recommend improving that.

E.X. If you don't know how to make good conversation or manage negative emotions then learn to improve this; there are plenty of great ebooks and self help resources on the web.

In the long run I honestly don't think women will typically arbitrarily "judge you" for being a virgin, they'll judge you more if you act weak or unconfident because of it.

I'm not as expert a "player" as some guys here are, only been with low double digits of women, but when I got lucky with women none of them ever "asked" if I was a virgin, they always responded to how I was acting in the moment. If I was standing around thinking negative and unconfident thoughts worried about rejection, they probably would have picked up on that "needy vibe" and rejected me, but when my mind was confident and optimistic in spite of my fears I had the most success.

Post: #6

If a girl has asked you if you are a virgin then you have a lot to work on.

Don't discuss in detail past relationships but reference them in a way that demonstrates value. Read up on how Mystery does this.

Post: #7

If you're a virgin late in life, then you have clear problems. I would see a psychologist and be honest and try to get yourself together.

Whenever a dude is a late life virgin is is always because of some personal defect of sorts. I'm not hating on you, but I'd really REALLY look into getting whatever big problem you have fixed.

Post: #8

(05-29-2016 06:46 PM)Fortis Wrote:  If you're a virgin late in life, then you have clear problems. I would see a psychologist and be honest and try to get yourself together.

Whenever a dude is a late life virgin is is always because of some personal defect of sorts. I'm not hating on you, but I'd really REALLY look into getting whatever big problem you have fixed.

True, the guy didn't give us anything to work with:

Is he overweight or out of shape, does have have a stable career plan or any strong hobbies outside the house? etc

Most guys I've personally encountered who were virgins into their late 20s or 30s were morbidly overweight, that's just my personal experience. Considering how easy women are today even a guy with subpar game or social skills should have no problem losing his virginity.

Post: #9

It depends: if it is some girl you don't care about and just want to sleep with, then just lie. If it is a girl you care about and see yourself dating seriously, I don't recommend lying. Just be vague and say you dated around but nothing serious. Unless you are nervous or really awkward, a woman is going to assume you had sex already so it's not going to come up.

But I think you need to get professional help if you are a virgin at the age of 30. It is almost always due to some deep seated problems. I was a late virgin and didn't get laid until I was 22. I was deathly terrified of approaching and getting rejected, had terrible conversation skills , no self confidence and had no idea how go from an initial interaction to sex. I also had a lot of false and limiting beliefs and had no one to go to for guidance or advice. It took me a while to get over those problems.

You need to find out why you are a virgin at your age by getting professional help or possibly meeting guys from the forum so they help diagnose your problem. I would say talk to your friends but if you are a virgin at your age you probably have no friends and the ones you have are likely as bad with women as you are.

Post: #10

I swear to God, for second I thought i made this post. To be honest, I am in the same situation as you in a sense. I'm overweight brown guy with personal defects glore. My SMV is in the negatives. I have not learn the game as well until finish the more pressing issues to handle with my career. As some commenters say, you got to fix your defects first. When you view yourself as flawed, you subconscious communicate with girls that you are not worthy or you don't bother with approaches since you view yourself worthless. Its better to live with yourself first before getting some ass.

Post: #11

Come to China and I will get you laid.

Post: #12

(05-29-2016 03:23 PM)newpua Wrote:  What kind of story would you create if during a date a girl asks you about your previous partners...if you never had any?

Honestly depends on what they're asking, BUT generally just like the other replies you never want to delve into talking about past relationships. In the past for me, if the girl is pressing on asking information then I usually tell them that I think its irrelevant and firmly leave it at that and change the frame. Feminism teaches women that their past doesn't matter (we know differently haha), so you can play by the same rules.

What I've found likely on dates is often girls try to bait me with talking about "I once dated a guy who took me surfing and I didn't like it" (for context I was talking about how I love surfing etc..) if anything it's a shit test to see if you react with jealousy and as long as you control frame and act indifferent you're golden(at least has worked for me).

I can identify with being a late bloomer etc.. (I was 21), what did it for me was learning frame control, to include your inner frame (in your head etc). I suggest reading up on NLP and being mindful of the way that you talk to yourself in your head. Mike Cernovich talks a lot about self talk, I suggest taking a gander at his work.

Post: #13

As someone who first got laid in his late 20s I can understand your worries. Being a late virgin is a huge burden for a guy, and the only way to get rid of this burden is to...get laid. There's no shortcut or workaround.

That being said, I doubt any woman you're on a date with is going to ask you if you were a virgin. I've never been asked that by anyone, not even the chick I lost my virginity to. And she was pretty experienced in those matters, to say the least. Of course, she probably realized she was my first after my abysmal first performance in the sack, but by then it was already too late. She obviously didn't mind, as I was the one that dumped her a couple of weeks later.

However, some girls will ask you about your previous relationships. It's a shit test with a multitude of uses, but you can always find good answers to pass it. With my current gf I've used the line "it's complicated", however she didn't budge and politely insisted. Then I came up with "well I don't like to talk about the past much. I've been cheated on once". She reacted in a sympathetic way, I switched the topic and started to ramble about how it's important to not let the past define you and similar shit, and voila - she never broached the subject again.

Like Travesty said, practice white-lying and you'll be good. Not just with girls, but in every life situation - for example on rare occasions mentioning your imaginary ex, or remembering some funny detail about your first girlfriend. Do that in front of coworkers or other people who don't know the truth. I found out this practice gave me some kind of confidence in these matters. I was sure no one in my workplace was going to suspect I'm a virgin, or worse, think I'm a latent homosexual. Better to preempt everyone by floating some small white lies around, than to risk being labeled as the dude who's never been seen around with a girl.

Fortis Wrote:If you're a virgin late in life, then you have clear problems. I would see a psychologist and be honest and try to get yourself together.

Barring some mental disorders, in which case he should visit a psychiatrist, that won't do him much good. Psychologists are useless in this matter because they most likely don't know anything about game, attraction, lifestyle, sexual marketplace realities etc. If he were to talk to a psychologist, he'd most probably get some variant of just be yourself as advice and a tap on the shoulder.

EDantes Wrote:Considering how easy women are today even a guy with subpar game or social skills should have no problem losing his virginity.

Not necessarily. The slutiness of modern women is of benefit only to alphas, not betas. This is most evident in the fact that women are becoming more and more promiscuous, yet more and more men have problems attracting women.

I personally know two guys in their early 30s who are still virgins. They both fit your definition in the sense that they possess basic social skills, but they act beta and have no life. They're not obese or anything.

Post: #14

Dont think or worry about lying but rather find a women who's perceived SMV is lower than yours and who's feeling grateful that you're dating her. Typical candidates for this would be older women/milfs or girls who are 1-2 points lower than you on the looks scale or who are into you due to status/power or whatever reason. These women will be patient with you and easily overlook your inexperience in bed. Also, reaching a certain skill level in bed only comes with experience so you gotta keep having sex till you perfect your skills.

As a late bloomer(22), it took me atleast 3-4 tries(that means trying to have sex on 3-4 different occasions over 5-6 days) to properly have sex for the first time. I also wasted 6-8 months trying to go out with experienced attractive women, who would easily give me their numbers and meet for dates but then I would lose them because my insecurity due to being a virgin would somehow surface. Eventually I found a girl who was into me from the get-go and was very patient with me despite all my failed attempts; the topic of me being a virgin never even came up, although I did try to casually say that I'll try to get it right the next time but she would comfort me by saying that we're both getting used to each other's bodies so it's all good.

Post: #15

(05-29-2016 10:35 PM)edmunddantes Wrote:  

(05-29-2016 03:23 PM)newpua Wrote:  What kind of story would you create if during a date a girl asks you about your previous partners...if you never had any?

Honestly depends on what they're asking, BUT generally just like the other replies you never want to delve into talking about past relationships. In the past for me, if the girl is pressing on asking information then I usually tell them that I think its irrelevant and firmly leave it at that and change the frame. Feminism teaches women that their past doesn't matter (we know differently haha), so you can play by the same rules.

What I've found likely on dates is often girls try to bait me with talking about "I once dated a guy who took me surfing and I didn't like it" (for context I was talking about how I love surfing etc..) if anything it's a shit test to see if you react with jealousy and as long as you control frame and act indifferent you're golden(at least has worked for me).

I can identify with being a late bloomer etc.. (I was 21), what did it for me was learning frame control, to include your inner frame (in your head etc). I suggest reading up on NLP and being mindful of the way that you talk to yourself in your head. Mike Cernovich talks a lot about self talk, I suggest taking a gander at his work.

Are you this previously banned member, returned from the dead?

Post: #16

Any 30+ yo virgins in Mexico? PM me, ill put the full force of my network behind you. Trust me and youll get laid.

Post: #17

That I am not. I assume there are a lot of fans of "The Count of Monte Cristo" and more than one person would use a characters name.

(05-30-2016 08:08 AM)Suits Wrote:  

(05-29-2016 10:35 PM)edmunddantes Wrote:  

(05-29-2016 03:23 PM)newpua Wrote:  What kind of story would you create if during a date a girl asks you about your previous partners...if you never had any?

Honestly depends on what they're asking, BUT generally just like the other replies you never want to delve into talking about past relationships. In the past for me, if the girl is pressing on asking information then I usually tell them that I think its irrelevant and firmly leave it at that and change the frame. Feminism teaches women that their past doesn't matter (we know differently haha), so you can play by the same rules.

What I've found likely on dates is often girls try to bait me with talking about "I once dated a guy who took me surfing and I didn't like it" (for context I was talking about how I love surfing etc..) if anything it's a shit test to see if you react with jealousy and as long as you control frame and act indifferent you're golden(at least has worked for me).

I can identify with being a late bloomer etc.. (I was 21), what did it for me was learning frame control, to include your inner frame (in your head etc). I suggest reading up on NLP and being mindful of the way that you talk to yourself in your head. Mike Cernovich talks a lot about self talk, I suggest taking a gander at his work.

Are you this previously banned member, returned from the dead?

Post: #18

The Count of Monte Cristo is a classic as far as male self-improvement goes.

Post: #19

Put the training wheels on for a second and go shoot some fish in a barrel somewhere in SEA to get rid of your "bang anxiety"

Then go home and work on your game

Post: #20

I'm not obese or unattractive...I'm slim (65 Kg), blue eyes, short hair, >170 cm, I regularly run, cycle and once in a while even lift weights, but I'm definitely not muscular. I don't eat meat.

I just
- Have a beta father full of insecurities...as much as I love him, he has been a disaster in not teaching me anything in how to flirt with women
- Have a mother with some insecurities issues too
- For many years I was more interested in travelling than girls
- Have very difficult tastes with girls

Psycologists are useless...they will just tell me to "go out more", "be more confident", etc...

Post: #21

Yes, you are right, psychologists are mostly useless, the entire industry is feminized and I do not think there are too many who can actually help a guy. I think counseling can be extremely useful, but from experience I can tell you that if you go in and start talking red pill, you'll get therapists trying to tell you to try something else- essentially they're telling you to spit up the red pill.

I'm very inexperienced and see a ton of parallels with your story for me. A couple of things I recommend:

1) Everyone's parents are messed up. Most dads do a terrible job of instilling masculine qualities in their sons for a plethora of reasons that are discussed ad nauseum on this forum. Stop blaming your parents- take control of your existence, you are going to have to work extremely hard but the work is the reward, you are going to become a better man.

2) The traveling and difficult tastes part is, quite possibly, a defense mechanism. I was a late virgin as well and made up all kinds of excuses to protect my own ego. The truth is, it's no fun to be rejected, and if you start putting yourself out there, you are going to be rejected a lot. But you are absolutely interested in girls or you wouldn't be here. A traveling hobby is one of the best hobbies you can have for getting girls, so you can do both at once.

3) Difficult taste could also be because you have issues with entitlement and think something is owed to you. Super hot girls are not going to be interested in that. Unfortunately, experience with girls begets experiences with girls-- it's really tough to shoot for the stars from the get-go unless you've been doing it since you were a teenager. If possible, you need to aim a bit lower and build up some experience.

Good luck, it is going to be a struggle. But you are in the right place and there are a ton of people on this board who are very skilled and very generous.

Post: #22

Most seduction gurus are also a waste of time for guys like you, but Ross Jeffries is one who can help you:

http://www.seduction.com/

Also, be nice to yourself. Go to a good ayahuasca retreat for about a week.

Are you in a city where you can find acting classes? Take some if you can.

Post: #23

(05-30-2016 06:27 PM)newpua Wrote:  I'm not obese or unattractive...I'm slim (65 Kg), blue eyes, short hair, >170 cm, I regularly run, cycle and once in a while even lift weights, but I'm definitely not muscular. I don't eat meat.

I just
- Have a beta father full of insecurities...as much as I love him, he has been a disaster in not teaching me anything in how to flirt with women
- Have a mother with some insecurities issues too
- For many years I was more interested in travelling than girls
- Have very difficult tastes with girls

Psycologists are useless...they will just tell me to "go out more", "be more confident", etc...

Some questions for you:

How many women do you approach in a week?

Can you carry a conversation?

How do you think others perceive you?

Do you have friends?


You mention having difficult tastes but I think with your situation, you just need to focus on getting laid, even with a woman you don't find that attractive just to get over that mental hurdle. You may have gotten laid earlier if you weren't so picky. And sex with average looking women can be enjoyable.

Most of the guys that get laid the most have the widest standards, meaning that they go for attractive women but they are willing to bang an average or ugly girl if nothing else better is around.

Post: #24

(05-30-2016 06:27 PM)newpua Wrote:  I'm not obese or unattractive...I'm slim (65 Kg), blue eyes, short hair, >170 cm, I regularly run, cycle and once in a while even lift weights, but I'm definitely not muscular. I don't eat meat.

I just
- Have a beta father full of insecurities...as much as I love him, he has been a disaster in not teaching me anything in how to flirt with women
- Have a mother with some insecurities issues too
- For many years I was more interested in travelling than girls
- Have very difficult tastes with girls

Psycologists are useless...they will just tell me to "go out more", "be more confident", etc...

How's your sex drive? Do you get morning boners? Do you have fantasies of fucking girls you know?
The parts in bold tell me that you might have a problem there.

For the rest I completely agree with egionesco.

Also you should lie about being a virgin.
There's no point in telling women the objective truth, only their perception of you matters.
Especially for something like being a virgin, since there is no way she can find out the truth (unless she has sex with you, which would be mission accomplished for you).

Post: #25

The last time a girl asked me about previous relationships I was balls deep inside her. I told her I was a virgin.

What I mean is that you are taking this too seriously.

A good answer to "who were your previous partners" (girls don't talk that way):
Mother Teresa and princess diana

If she pushes make fun of her because she is being a dweeb.