Post: #1

What kind of approach do you take when you get an opening with a girl but you don't have much time to do anything about it?

Example:

I was in a bar earlier with a girl I'd met for the first time through online dating, she doesn't look as good as her pics and I had already decided pretty quickly it wasn't going to go anywhere. I'm at the bar waiting for my drinks when a cute chick turns rounds and starts talking to me, turns round to face me, making strong eye contact, she's with a friend who's talking to a couple at the end of the bar, the girl I'm with is standing right behind me. I'm mid to late thirties, cute chick is mid twenties. As I'm waiting for the drinks I ask the girl I'm with if she wants to go find a table while I wait on the drinks which she does, as I engage the cute chick in conversation the drinks are on the bar and her friend turns round to introduce her to this other couple, however as she's turning she's pointing to her friend that she's talking to me - if I didn't have company it would have been straightforward to either stay put and keep the conversation going or join the group. However with this other chick waiting and the drinks on the bar I made my excuses and left.

Options:

I ignore the chick I'm with for a couple of minutes and try to get the cute chicks number.

I ignore the chick I'm with for as long as it takes to make something happen - I didn't consider this at the time as I'd only just met her and wouldn't have felt that great about treating her a bit shitty - she wasn't bad looking, just older looking than I expected.

I lay my cards on table, tell cute chick what the deal is and go for the number, maybe even try to meet up later once I get rid of my company.

I chalk it up to experience and move on. I don't like this option as I feel it's better to make some sort of attempt regardless of how it plays out than let the moment slip.

What would you have done?

Post: #2

Option PT

Tell the fugly chick you're not into it but if she's down to help you land a 3 way you'll stick it out for the evening.

"Everybody's happy. And by everybody I mean me"

(I stole that last line)

Post: #3

If I could have turned it into a 3 way I wouldn't be posting in the newbie forum...

Post: #4

(04-09-2016 01:50 AM)Lagavulin Wrote:  If I could have turned it into a 3 way I wouldn't be posting in the newbie forum...

Maybe your inability to read a 41-word post has something to do with that.

He's not telling you to go out, snap your fingers, say the magic pussy spell and have a threesome. He's telling you to approach her and tell her that if she helps you land a threesome, you'll be into it.

The mechanics of that approach aren't bad, either. You're working with time constraints, so you resolve that by saying you're with a friend and going get the ugly girl you're with.

Then you go tell your ugly friend you aren't feeling it, tell her to help you land a threesome, and best case scenario she wings for you and you have a shot at getting the coveted threesome. It'll also be easier to slip into the group when bringing in another girl.

Most probable scenario, she walks.

The moral is, if you decided the interaction wasn't going anywhere and you had a chance to seal with a cute girl, what's the question?

Let the ugly bitch wait. If she was a sif or otherwise deceptive in her profile, you shouldn't feel bad for making her wait because, if we're keeping score, she was the first one to fuck up. So you should have blown her off for a while to scope your chances, or done the PT route and tried to use her for something useful.

Otherwise, it sounds like you're just buying drinks and wasting your time with an ugly broad who fooled you with some Tinder glamor shots.

Post: #5

(04-09-2016 01:50 AM)Lagavulin Wrote:  If I could have turned it into a 3 way I wouldn't be posting in the newbie forum...

My previous post was primarily intended facetiously. But there's truth within it.

Your question really isn't about game per-se but rather about one's personal moral code (though that does greatly affect one's game). Do you completely disregard another's (fugly chick) feelings and go after what you want (cute chick)?

Empathy. Do you consider it a burden?.. or exalt it as an admirable attribute? It's really a question to run through your own moral filter. You might get a lot of different answers but they will be based on the respondent's personal moral compass.

Personally I might have told the fugly chick "Hey I ran into a friend of mine at the bar that I need to resolve some stuff with. I don't want to be rude but just give me a few minutes and I'll be back" Go game cute chick, get the digits, then tell her "Hey I don't want to be rude to my friend so I'll call/text you"(quick ejections after getting a number is a good idea IMO anyway). Come back to fugly chick and keep my conscience intact

Post: #6

@ Tex - my reading ability has nothing to do with it. PT was obviously being facetious which wasn't the response I was hoping for.

Anyway thanks for taking the time to reply. I don't think a threesome was ever anywhere near likely, however I do concede that maybe my frame of mind needs to improve with regards to what is possible - it wasn't even on my radar. What's clear to me now is that I should have stayed put and tried with the cutie.

With regards to wasting my time with the fugly - that's always a risk with online dating, you don't know what you're going to get till she shows up. Her pics were a few years old, I met her after work for a quick drink, no big deal. She wasn't bad looking, I just happen to be looking for a bit of quality rather than more notches at the moment.

@Papaya Tapper - it is indeed a matter of conscience. I've treated a lot of chicks with varying levels of disrespect in the past but I'm a bit older and not as selfish nowadays and I've changed. Mostly there's no need.

Both your replies helped me clarify what I should have done, and made me consider my boundaries so thanks.

Post: #7

I like that you told her to go find a table, nice move. I would however stay and talk to the chick for a maximum of 4-5 minutes, get her number and walk back to the original date. Once you sit down just say you met an old friend and start talking about something else, no big deal.

Post: #8

(04-11-2016 06:04 PM)Lagavulin Wrote:  @ Tex - my reading ability has nothing to do with it. PT was obviously being facetious which wasn't the response I was hoping for.

Anyway thanks for taking the time to reply. I don't think a threesome was ever anywhere near likely, however I do concede that maybe my frame of mind needs to improve with regards to what is possible - it wasn't even on my radar. What's clear to me now is that I should have stayed put and tried with the cutie.

With regards to wasting my time with the fugly - that's always a risk with online dating, you don't know what you're going to get till she shows up. Her pics were a few years old, I met her after work for a quick drink, no big deal. She wasn't bad looking, I just happen to be looking for a bit of quality rather than more notches at the moment.

@Papaya Tapper - it is indeed a matter of conscience. I've treated a lot of chicks with varying levels of disrespect in the past but I'm a bit older and not as selfish nowadays and I've changed. Mostly there's no need.

Both your replies helped me clarify what I should have done, and made me consider my boundaries so thanks.

If you knew my post was intended facetiously then why respond with the mildly snarky attitude?

(04-09-2016 01:50 AM)Lagavulin Wrote:  If I could have turned it into a 3 way I wouldn't be posting in the newbie forum...

Tex was just giving you a little of the same back.

FYI...don't be surprised if you get back what you give on this forum.

Nevertheless I'm glad we were able to share some additional perspectives We're all about helping each other as a community. Welcome to the forum.

Post: #9

Just googled facetious - misunderstanding on my part, and I didn't mean to come across as snarky. Apologies!

Thanks for the welcome!

Post: #10

I consider bluntness a kindness to a girl I'm not feeling. If you had better odds and the girl is someone you have met just recently then just tell her that she's not your type in a jokey way or imply it like PT posted above.

Granted this is coming from a guy whom has done it both ways. Being in your situation and going for the better looking girl leaving dick in hand, and less often than I'd like going in extra ballsy then pulling. Or trading down for a more DTF girl where I've called a girl out for not having a good vibe towards me then going to bang the passable girl giving me eyes.