(12-16-2015 01:49 PM)Anabasis to Desta Wrote: Excellent discussion. Excelsior, I don't know how old you are but you're going places! We have very similar long-term plans it's scary.
Good to know I'm not the only one.
I'm probably much younger than you based on what you've revealed to the forum.
Quote:I highly disproportionate percentage of us black guys on this forum are of African and Caribbean background. If any of you have even the slightest connection to your culture, I recommend you raise your children over there.
By raising our kids in Jamaica, Nigeria, Ethiopia, Ghana etc ... we automatically offer them the best of both worlds.
An immediate spot in the upper/elite/ruling class of our respective countries. A strong identity, culture and sense of self your average American could only dream of. An elite private school education and regal attitude only possible at very elite East Coast schools in the US. At the same time we give them a valuable US/Canadian passport, a Western education, the limitless opportunities America offers and a diverse buffet of international punani.
You've articulated my own point of view perfectly.
I've seen the life that Jamaica's elite live. It isn't perfect (Jamaica is a developing nation with developing nation problems), but the sense of identity, self, culture, calm confidence, and freedom these people have is tremendous. They live in a society where there is no ceiling for them regardless of their skin tone, they have the luxury of knowing that no doors are closed to them where they are, their quality of life is tremendous (maids, drivers, etc), and they have the means/money to hop to the west (fly to Florida, New York, or London) and enjoy its conveniences at their leisure.
I realized after growing up here in the USA that these kids had lives that were fundamentally superior to mine in many ways, despite the fact that I grew up a middle class kid in the world's greatest super power. I never had their freedom, confidence, sense of self, and access. I never felt the sense of belonging they feel in their homeland, where nobody looks down upon them on the basis of the fact that they have some African blood and where they can do anything.
The more I came to understand their lives, the more I wished I had been able to have a similar life. It is too late for me, but I can give that life to my children and let them enjoy the freedom I never had and be free of the black ceiling that will always cover me and any children I have while I'm here.
Quote:In the west, no matter how successful we are we will always be slaves to a certain master. A corporation, the government, state laws, bureaucracy etc ... the system is already established. It is almost impossible to build your own Empire. You could be a Cardiac Surgeon, Lawyer, top researcher or venture capitalist.
Doesn't matter because in the end, you might have the money and social status but you'll still be living in some lifeless suburb or gated community, kissing your white boss' or neighbors' ass.
The important thing I realized was that, no matter what happened, I was not in my country. It never really belonged to me, and it never would.
This is a nation that was built with the specific intent to exclude people who look like me or have even trace amounts of the heritage from which I primarily descend from any sort of progress or prosperity. It was designed largely by others for others.
Don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean that the USA hasn't done well by me. Quite the contrary, my parents were able to come to the USA and obtain great educations for themselves. They made a good living in stable jobs, lived in good towns with nice homes and great services, drove what in Jamaica would be considered luxury vehicles, and were able to send their son to the best schools in the nation (and on the planet). This nation has treated us well.
But there are limits to this. I like to analogize it to a visitor's relationship with a host.
When you are invited into somebody else's home, you may be offered great hospitality. They might make you tea and bring you a snack. They might offer you a seat at their table to partake of their dinner. They might even give you a room to stay in and access to their bathroom for your rest, cleanliness, and comfort.
All of this might be really beneficial to you. But no matter how much you enjoy, appreciate, and benefit from their hospitality, you are still a guest. The house does not belong to you. You occupy it at the pleasure and kind discretion of the host. You take what the host offers, but you don't go beyond the boundaries set for you as a guest. When offered the guest bedroom, for example, you don't go flop down on the king-sized bed in the master bedroom - that's not your place, and it never will be. The host is kind to offer you any place in his house at all, but it is still his house and it always will be - you must act accordingly.
America is the house, white America is the host, and I am a guest. I have been treated very well by the hosts here whose rules have given myself and my relatives a great living, great education, and great opportunities for socio-economic advancement. I appreciate all that I have been given, but I understand the context in which I have received it. I am a guest here, and I have learned the hard way over time where the boundaries are. I am grateful for what I have received within them, but I ultimately seek to find a place in which I am not longer restrained by them and may have the power to set them myself. At the very least, I want my children to know such a place.
Quote:You might drive a Maserati ( Benz man myself) but you'll never have that one thing that's relayively easily available to us in our third world roots. That one thing every man craves deep down.
Freedom! Total freedom. 'Fuck you nigga' kinda money. A six figure salary in the West along with a wife who earns a similar income will make you a rockstar in Ethiopia or Jamaica. You will rub shoulders with the elites of the country.
I'm talking about dining with the Prime Minister, getting invited to an Art Gala by the richest man in the country or getting crunk with loaded foreign investors with big plans who in their own countries you wouldn't even get a whiff of. African economies are not established yet. There are so many gaps that need to be filled. Intelligent guys with some money could easily make hundreds of millions in a decade or two.
The competition is non-existent. 3 maids, a bodyguard, a chauffeur, a gardener, poolboy and shoeshine ... that's the kinda shit that's waiting for us and our children. All the above is from personal experience and how i grew up despite my parents just being regular Dentists.
Couldn't have said it better.
Whatever you say about the USA, it is a fantastic place to make money, and there's plenty to be had if you're willing to put your head down and hustle. There's great incentive for individuals like ourselves with roots abroad to stack our paper here and take it back home. What you bank may only buy you a middle-class lifestyle in the states, but it can make you nobility back home, and who doesn't want to be a noble?
I've seen the American nobility. I know what their aristocracy looks like (don't let the talk of democracy and such fool you, America has and always has had an untitled aristocracy - spend enough time in the right places and they become painfully easy to spot). I've spent years rubbing shoulders with them as I've gotten my education, and it is in that time that I have learned the hard way that no matter my dilligence, education, industry, intellect, or personal merit, I'll never be one of them. They will never see me as a peer, nor will my children be their peers.
That's fine - it is their aristocracy, and they need not allow guests if they choose not to, but why settle for that when you can prove worthy somewhere else of the very nobility they enjoy? Why settle for a permanent place under their feet for yourself and your descendants when you know you can go further?
I asked myself these questions and couldn't come up with a good affirmative answer. That's when I decided to formulate a long-term plan to move on. I don't need to be a guest forever.
Quote:Surprised you guys are even considering mixed kids. Slay all that White, Asian, Latina, Middle eastern pussy you want. But breed with your own. I will never breed with a non-Ethiopian girl. I have no interest in raising a kid that does not look like me.
I'll explain.
1. I like all kinds of women. This is a bit of a simple point, but it means that I'm strongly compelled to get with quality women of all types. If I see a quality woman and I have any chance to get at here, I'll do it and I'll want to breed her as well if she's good enough because that's my natural instinct. This desire is the same whether this quality woman looks just like me (dark skin, naturally kinky hair) or doesn't - I can't help that, and I see little reason to do so.
2. Were I to choose only to "breed with my own", I'd end up with a Jamaican girl, not merely a black one. This means I could end up with a girl who looks like
this,
this,
this,
this,
this, or
even this - they're all "my own".
Since I'm on the darker end of the spectrum, I could put my focus on women who resemble me over those who may be Jamaican but are racially distinct and would produce children who didn't quite "look like me". That wouldn't do me any good, however, because the girl who looks more like me can often be the one who is least like me and least compatible with me.
An African-American girl might more closely resemble me than some Jamaican women do, but I'll be on a much closer cultural wavelength with a white, Chinese, Lebanese, or Indo-Jamaican woman than your typical black American, even though the black American more closely resembles me. Even if I expanded "my own" to include other English-speaking Caribbeans who are culturally and geographically somewhat similar, it would be the same thing: I probably would be on a more even level with an Indo-Trinidadian girl than your typical African American from Detroit or the Bronx.
At the end of the day, I would choose the woman whose cultural perspectives I find more amenable to me over the one who does not, as I think this is a more important factor in choosing a mother to a child than her physical appearance. I have to accept that a large portion (probably a majority) of the women who have such amenable perspectives don't look like me, so I'll need to be open minded to maximize my odds of finding one.
3. I want a quality woman. Quality woman = quality children. I improve my odds of finding a quality woman when I don't exclude 80% of the world's population simply because they don't look like me. My children's hair texture and skin tone are not as important as the quality (physically, culturally, mentally) of their mother. The more open I am, the more likely I am to find the highest quality woman possible.
4. I am more than my skin tone and my hair texture. This is the biggest reason why I don't like this argument about avoiding interracial unions because "the kids need to look like me". It is too superficial.
When people use the argument, they refer primarily to hair texture and skin tone as these are the biggest differences you usually see in mixed children.
When I look at mixed children, however, I see much more than this. There are many ways for a child to resemble you beyond hair and skin color. I've seen mixed children express the facial features of both parents, with some products of black and white unions even taking more from the fairer side that people insist is "wiped out" in such pairings. Then there's height, athleticism, intellect, persona, and the actual DNA itself to be passed down.
If I end up with an Asian or a European, my kids will not look exactly like me. They will have fairer skin and different hair. But they might have my facial features, my height, my athletic/physical traits (speed, musculature, arm length, coordination, etc), my intellect, my personality traits, and they will certainly have my DNA. They may not look just like me on the surface, but in actuality they will be more like me than any of the hundreds of millions of people who have skin and hair similar to my own and look more "like me" on first glance, but with whom I have little in common intellectually, personally, or genetically. The children may not have my hair or skin or even all of my facial features, but they will be very much like me below the surface, where it matters. That is what is most important in my view.
(12-16-2015 11:22 AM)rudebwoy Wrote: As for the skin tone remark that Excelsior pointed out on another thread. I feel any man should want his children to resemble him, I am not offended by this comment.
Black men seem to have a strong desire not to want the same thing, which shows you the pyschological abuse we are under.
I have my reasons for disagreeing, as I noted above in response to Anabasis.
Quote:As you get older, your views will change. You will think about children and you will think about getting a life partner. As Moma stated, many interracial relationships are based on sexual attraction and lust. I don't know if many white women are prepared to raise a "black" child, let alone sending their children to the Caribbean to be schooled.
They're not.
Quote:I think marriage is hard enough, your first instinct should be to get a partner that knows your struggle and what it is like to wear the black skin.
I've devoted the vast majority of my romantic energy during since beginning my university education (that is the better part of half a decade now) to the pursuit of black women. They may know what it is to "wear the black skin", but they don't know my struggle and they don't take well to me.
Granted, these are black American women I have been pursuing (can't speak for the other 1 Billion+ blacks on Earth), but I can say this: black skin =/= superior compatibility or a higher likelihood of understanding my particular struggles. Results vary by individual, and I'm no longer willing to constrain myself based on a false assumption of compatibility that is in itself sources strictly from superficial surface traits (read: the fact that we both have black skin).
I want women who mesh well with me and are of what I consider to be high quality. I don't care what their ethnic background looks like.