Post: #1

If you're going out on a date with a girl, when should you pay? Should you absolutely not pay a dime until you've banged her? Keeping in my mind that I'm only 19 I don't think I'll be getting regular bangs like some of the guy's in their early to mid 20's so i think i'll be sticking to get a girlfriend in order for her to bang me. Also, how do you handle a hypothetical situation like:

Waiter: That'll be $23.75

grasshopper chirps....

Post: #2

my advise would be not to take her to a place where you dont have to spend alot of money' if she really likes you she might even wanna pay but my advise is to stay away from the spending places because girls fuck for free.

Post: #3

Depends on who asked who out. If she pays, chances are that she wont hang around to long. Even going dutch she may not stay. Stay within your means, but pay for the date.

Post: #4

If you're 19 you're gonna be hard pressed to find ANY girl your age willing to fork over cash on the date. Instead of taking her out, hang out at your place, outdoors, somewhere cool, whatever. Get someone to supply you booze at your place and do a "movie night" and you're golden.

Post: #5

(10-28-2011 01:05 PM)Gmac Wrote:  If you're 19 you're gonna be hard pressed to find ANY girl your age willing to fork over cash on the date. Instead of taking her out, hang out at your place, outdoors, somewhere cool, whatever. Get someone to supply you booze at your place and do a "movie night" and you're golden.

GMAC, are you against paying for the girl because it shows neediness on the male's part or because of saving money? I think it depends on the culture too right?

Post: #6

Don't get a girlfriend unless you intend to keep working on your game or creep around. Its hard to get back, I don't want you suffering a dry spell when you break up!

Post: #7

(10-28-2011 05:55 PM)Carne Wrote:  

(10-28-2011 01:05 PM)Gmac Wrote:  If you're 19 you're gonna be hard pressed to find ANY girl your age willing to fork over cash on the date. Instead of taking her out, hang out at your place, outdoors, somewhere cool, whatever. Get someone to supply you booze at your place and do a "movie night" and you're golden.

GMAC, are you against paying for the girl because it shows neediness on the male's part or because of saving money? I think it depends on the culture too right?

Personally, it's the money issue. If I had the money I could care less if that one thing I did came across as beta.

Post: #8

I almost always pay, on EVERY date.

Reason:
I enjoy girls with a high feminine vibe (we all do, otherwise there wouldn't be so much feminism bashing around here) and as such, I play my own part -- the man pays, the girl smiles appreciatively and says 'thank you'. It's all a part of the vibe.

Exceptions when I don't pay:
- Girl insists on paying. Don't argue, just let her pay.
- Girl is clearly financially successful, in which case I would pay only occasionally
- Girl seems to be golddigging, enjoying the free beer/food rather than being into me - in which case I just let her go anyway.

And as mentioned before, do take her to a place that you can actually afford comfortably!

Post: #9

(10-27-2011 01:10 AM)joker Wrote:  If you're going out on a date with a girl, when should you pay?

The main rule here is that paying the bill shouldn't cause any awkwardness. This is why it is useful to check the expectations before the bill arrives, typically by throwing in some stories/past references. The culture varies by country:

In the US? You're paying by default (if the bill comes and she says nothing), but if she insists to pay, pass it to her. If she says let's split, say I'll pay this one, and you'll pay the next round. Splitting almost always feels awkward.

In Asia a man is typically expected to pay for everything on a date. But if you're with an older chick, she may pay for you. Never seen or heard about splitting there.

In Eastern Europe and Russia nowadays a lot of girls ask to split, and they mean it - there is a "the one who dines the girl fucks her" stigma, and she won't let you pay for her on the first date unless she's really sure you won't interpret as her "using" you in exchange for future sex. In this case you can revert the US rule - let her pay the whole tab, and you'll pick up the next tab.

Quote:Should you absolutely not pay a dime until you've banged her?

No, this is just plain stupid. What you should do is do as you typically do. If you plan to invite a girl in a specific expensive venue for the first date, ask yourself whether you'd invite your male buddy to that venue. If the answer is yes, then there is no problem.

There is huge difference between someone who goes to an upscale lounge with his first date solely to impress her (and typically goes to dive bars), and someone who goes to an upscale lounge with his first date because that's what where always goes (and never goes to dive bars). The former one is overcompensating, and indicates your low value. The latter one is indicating high value.

Quote:Also, how do you handle a hypothetical situation like:
Waiter: That'll be $23.75

You take the bill, reach for your wallet, get $25 or $30 cash, give it to waitress, say "no change". If the girl is silent during this process, that's all you do.
If she says, "let me handle that", pass her the bill. You can optionally say "No, I'll handle this one, and you'll pay the next round", and if she still insist, give it to her.