Post: #1

Went solo to a bar yesterday, noticed a certain girl look at me. Got nervous, I looked the other way.

She started talking to another guy and she danced wildly for a long time. The guy seemed pretty drunk afterwards and I noticed she seemed avoiding him. I tried stepping in, but before I could tap her to talk, she went back to dancing.

Made a second try when she was leaving, with purse in hand, but due to some bad timing I only managed to catch up to her outside.

When I approached her, I said something like, I've been wanting to talk to you the whole night. Do you come here often? Can I see you again or will you come here again? I'd really like to talk to you. (This took a lot of courage for a guy like me to do so I'm not regretting that much as I'm a total newbie)

Despite whatever I said she kept repeating, I'll be fine, I'll take a cab, thank you. And then she went and I went back home alone.

Some background, I'm foreign and this was in Arlington and the girl seemed local (white).

Question is, is it impolite to approach someone like this outside the door? Should I have made contact with her inside only?

Post: #2

My 2 cents: no it is not impolite. Yes, you should have made contact her before she was leaving, with a much less needy approach.

Post: #3

(10-02-2011 03:04 PM)NightWolf Wrote:  My 2 cents: no it is not impolite. Yes, you should have made contact her before she was leaving, with a much less needy approach.

Thanks. Just one more question, as I'm an absolute beginner with the bar scene, so is it worth going there tonight? (Being a Sunday night) Or should I wait for next weekend?

Post: #4

As you are newbie I would say go and approach.

Post: #5

(10-02-2011 03:19 PM)NightMan Wrote:  

(10-02-2011 03:04 PM)NightWolf Wrote:  My 2 cents: no it is not impolite. Yes, you should have made contact her before she was leaving, with a much less needy approach.

Thanks. Just one more question, as I'm an absolute beginner with the bar scene, so is it worth going there tonight? (Being a Sunday night) Or should I wait for next weekend?

Go out 4 nights a week if you can. Try different venues.

Post: #6

Approach like a monster while you figure out how people respond to you.

Post: #7

Sunday? I don't recommend going out any night aside from Wed - Sat in the VA/DC area unless it's a holiday. All you're find is bar rats usually, mostly men. Not worth it. On occasion, hotel bars and lounges in the area can be decent during the week (Monday - Thursday between 6-10 pm). Hit or miss.

Post: #8

(10-02-2011 08:02 PM)Gmac Wrote:  Sunday? I don't recommend going out any night aside from Wed - Sat in the VA/DC area unless it's a holiday. All you're find is bar rats usually, mostly men. Not worth it. On occasion, hotel bars and lounges in the area can be decent during the week (Monday - Thursday between 6-10 pm). Hit or miss.

Saw your message after I had left. You're right, looked pretty deserted. Will try next weekend. Thanks.

Post: #9

Try not to make yourself sound so needy. Talk to her like you know the answers to all of those things, maybe play up that you're not from there ask whats good around etc. Try to approach earlier in the night so if you're not leaving with her she might see you outside the club and remember how awesome you were. Tell her you want her to show you a new place at a later date number close if you haven't already etc.