Post: #26

(08-23-2018 06:14 PM)TheGrowth Wrote:  I didn't squirt it in when I rawdogged the gf

That probably doesn't make much difference. You'd still leak precum and it would be highly contagious. You might be in luck if you always piss directly before banging and only banged a couple of times.

(08-23-2018 06:14 PM)TheGrowth Wrote:  There are two possible people I could have gotten this from and one is the gf. The fat drunk girl swears she'd been tested and was squeaky clean , obviously I don't put 100% faith in her statement but it's at least worth consideration that she may be right .

You'll need to write up a timeline with as many details as possible to determine if you likely got it from fattie or your gf, and whether or not you transmitted it:
- How many times did you bang fattie and when?
- How many days later did you develop symptoms (if you developed any)?
- When did you and fattie get tested or otherwise determine that you were infected?
- How many times have you banged your GF since you think you were infected?

The CDC says: "Incubation period: usually 1-14 days for symptomatic disease. Most become symptomatic in 2-5 days after exposure."

(08-23-2018 06:14 PM)TheGrowth Wrote:  So why would I do this if the gf is the one that gave it to me, definitely not impossible.

Agreed. Better to try to figure out the details first.

Post: #27

(08-23-2018 10:59 PM)DaveR Wrote:  You'll need to write up a timeline with as many details as possible to determine if you likely got it from fattie or your gf, and whether or not you transmitted it

Day 1: Pounded the fat girl
Day 14-28: Symptoms so mild they could have started anywhere during this time
Day 33: Got tested, took the shot and the pills on the spot
Day 40: Symptoms finally went away on the very last day, expected to go away sooner.
Day 54: Pounded the gf, pulled it out, well maybe just a slight squirt before pulling out
Day 56: Symptoms returned, got tested, figured it had come back, was given a course of stronger meds
Note that any time after day 40 and before day 56 the symptoms could have returned, I just never checked since I assumed it was cleared up (didn't know it could resurface) However another possibility is that it indeed did go away and then got a subsequent strain from the gf on day 54, hence the points of the discussion.

Post: #28

(08-23-2018 06:43 PM)Dasein Wrote:  After that, explain that you got [NAME of STD Here]. Do not say STD, use the exact medical name for whatever this is. Then say that you asked the doctor and he said that there were only two possibilities-- that you got it from her or that you got it from a toilet seat or other environmental cause, but that those are extremely unlikely. Then ask her again, honestly, in the last 10 years have you ever done something that may have caused this? If she has, she may actually say yes here, but odds are, she will say no. At that point make her promise it or whatever. Then tell her that she needs to get tested.

This is good start for actionable advice. At this point you need your girl to get tested, but I wouldn't bring up this conversation out of the blue because it's somewhat suspicious and may cause her to wonder why you're asking these questions after 10 years.

My advice is to find a reason to get your girl to want to get tested. Basically turning the tables so to speak, so it's her idea that you and her should get tested.

What I would do is ask an old friend for assistance. Due to the length of your relationship, you need a friend that she knows, but doesn't know well, or at least not well enough to know when he's lying.

This friend hangs out with you and her, and tells a story about how he recently broke up with his LTR or fiancee, because she gave him a disease (let's say HPV). What happened was his ex-girl had HPV but never got tested and the HPV got so bad that not only did she infect your friend, but she also developed a high risk for cervical cancer. Make sure you enlist a friend who can bullshit enough to scare your girl about how dangerous HPV can be, and how she may be at risk for cervical cancer even at her age. He then describes how this incident basically led to the implosion of his relationship, because he believed his ex contacted HPV from another man.

Your friend then encourages both of you to get tested, not only for you and your girl's health, but for the health of your relationship. You agree with your friend and say that's a good idea, maybe you and her should get tested.

Hopefully this works well enough to plant a seed in your girl's mind. Then it's up to you to water this seed by casually mentioning HPV a couple of days later, following up with random comments about her getting cervical cancer. Be patient and don't insist for her to get tested. If she doesn't take the bait, then announce one day that your scared of HPV and that you're going to get tested. Ask her for her support and comment that she should go with you to get tested.

Hopefully, this will lead her to follow along and get tested too. If not, then at the testing lab ask her to get tested with you because you care about her and want to make sure that's she safe and cancer free.

This isn't foolproof, but it's the best I can think of at the moment. But your strategy here is to find a way to get your girl in that testing lab but making it think it's her idea.

Now obviously is she does get tested and tests positive, then you're going to need a second plan...

Post: #29

Your girlfriend doesn't need to get tested, she just needs to get treated. If your infection cleared after medication then came back when you fucked her again then she has it. How gullible/unaware is your girlfriend and how likely is she to fall for a toilet seat story? If you were to take her to your doctor to be treated, would she likely ask questions like "can I really get it from a toilet seat?" or would she just be silent and shy and get out there asap?

Post: #30

(08-23-2018 11:29 PM)TheGrowth Wrote:  

(08-23-2018 10:59 PM)DaveR Wrote:  You'll need to write up a timeline with as many details as possible to determine if you likely got it from fattie or your gf, and whether or not you transmitted it

Day 1: Pounded the fat girl
Day 14-28: Symptoms so mild they could have started anywhere during this time
Day 33: Got tested, took the shot and the pills on the spot
Day 40: Symptoms finally went away on the very last day, expected to go away sooner.
Day 54: Pounded the gf, pulled it out, well maybe just a slight squirt before pulling out
Day 56: Symptoms returned, got tested, figured it had come back, was given a course of stronger meds
Note that any time after day 40 and before day 56 the symptoms could have returned, I just never checked since I assumed it was cleared up (didn't know it could resurface) However another possibility is that it indeed did go away and then got a subsequent strain from the gf on day 54, hence the points of the discussion.

So the possibilities are:

1. you caught it from fattie and were later treated, but the treatment failed.
The CDC guidelines say that symptoms should improve within a few days after treatment, not that they should completely clear within that timeframe. That it took seven days probably isn't of much concern.
If this is the case, it's best to assume that your GF is infected too, since you banged close to the time when you had symptoms.
Fattie says she tested clear beforehand, but a woman's word isn't worth a lot. Has she been tested since you banged her?

2. caught it from fattie, banged your GF and passed it to her, got treated but GF didn't, then banged again and caught it back from her.
Did you bang your GF between day 1 and 54? If not, this isn't a possibility.

3. you caught it from your GF and were treated, but the treatment failed or you caught it from her again as she wasn't treated at the same time.


It does sound a lot like your GF is infected.. you banged her on day 54 and two days later symtoms appeared - a textbook case.

Post: #31

You only banged your LTR once in 54 days?

This in itself is reason to call it quits.

Post: #32

Thinking about this some more... statistics can be applied to this situation.

Most studies say the risk of a man catching the clap from a single round of banging is about 20%. Your own risk may be higher or lower than that, depending on your immune system, banging style, circumcision and other factors.

Let's assume that your probability of catching the clap from banging an infected girl is 20% per round, and the probability of treatment failure is 50%:

Assuming your girl was clean on day 1 and you didn't bang her from day 1 to 54, the only way you could be infected now is if you caught it from fattie AND your treatment failed. The probability of those two events combined is: 20% x 50% = 10%

Assuming you caught it from your girl before day 1, you didn't bang her from day 1 to 54, and fattie was clean. There are two avenues of infection in this case: treatment failure (50% chance) OR re-infection (20% chance): 50% + 20% = 70%.
Even if we assume the chance of treatment failure is only 20% and the chance of infection per round of banging is 10%, you're still looking at 30% probability of infection - much higher than the probability of catching it from fattie AND the treatment failing.

If I had to place a bet and knew that you didn't bang your girl from day 1 to 54, I would bet that you caught it from your girl before day 1.

Post: #33

Your probabilities need to be conditional on his having the bacteria

The probability of getting the bacteria from a given intercourse is 20% ex ante. But the probability of getting the bacteria from a given intercourse given that you do in fact have the bacteria now is much closer to 100%.

Additionally probabilities are useful for a population but useless for an individual.

Post: #34

Dodgy, the friend can obtained but we're not talking hpv we're talking the clap and we were both tested upon getting into the ltr and then once again thereafter just to be sure.

Dream, possibly but it would have to be a more realistic scenario than a toilet seat.

Dave, prior to day 54 we were using protection (unless you go a year or so back but I would have noticed symptoms at some point).
Clearly fattie had it since I had both symptoms and treatment prior to day 54.

I guess the question now becomes, if I was symptom-free on day 53 could I have still had it but passed it on on day 54 and then the symptoms recur on day 56?
If that's not a realistic scenario then it points to the gf having it and giving it to me, so essentially I got it twice, and then having symptoms on day 56.

Looking for spyware that doesn't require logging into the phone

Post: #35

(08-24-2018 08:18 AM)Montrose Wrote:  Your probabilities need to be conditional on his having the bacteria

The probability of getting the bacteria from a given intercourse is 20% ex ante. But the probability of getting the bacteria from a given intercourse given that you do in fact have the bacteria now is much closer to 100%.

That's a good point. I didn't think of it.

(08-24-2018 08:18 AM)Montrose Wrote:  Additionally probabilities are useful for a population but useless for an individual.

I know they're not accurate, but dead reckoning is much better than a wild guess.
Also I forgot to account for the common outcome in the second case, so it would be 60%, not 70% - still much more likely.

(08-24-2018 08:48 AM)TheGrowth Wrote:  Dave, prior to day 54 we were using protection (unless you go a year or so back but I would have noticed symptoms at some point).
Clearly fattie had it since I had both symptoms and treatment prior to day 54.

Yeah, that makes the likelyhood of fattie being the source a lot higher. Keep in mind that condoms aren't 100% perfect at preventing transmission - there's still a small risk. Also, I hate to throw another wrench into the mix, but the clap can live in the throat and it's possible to catch it from a blowjob.
It would be very useful to find out for sure if fattie tested positive, if you're still on reasonable terms with her.

(08-24-2018 08:48 AM)TheGrowth Wrote:  I guess the question now becomes, if I was symptom-free on day 53 could I have still had it but passed it on on day 54 and then the symptoms recur on day 56?
If that's not a realistic scenario then it points to the gf having it and giving it to me, so essentially I got it twice, and then having symptoms on day 56.

If your treatment failed, you could have passed it on at any point, even if you didn't have symptoms at the time. Your immune system keeps clearing out the bacteria for up to a week after symptoms subside.

I'm still kind of suspicious because you were symptom-free for two weeks, which is a reasonably long time. The textbook says that symptoms appear 2-5 days after exposure in most cases (but anywhere from 1-14 days is possible). Two days is right on time for your girl reinfecting you.

Post: #36

Here's what we've deduced thus far:
1. Fatty had it and gave it to me
2. Not possible for me to have given it to the gf prior to day 54
The remaining questions are then:
Did I give it to the gf on day 54, did she give it to me on day 54, or was day 56 when fattys clap (that didn't go away with the first treatment) coincidentally resurfaced?
This is why knowing if the gf has it now (any way to tell by visual inspection) or if the gf had it prior to day 54 (text surveillance) would be invaluable

Post: #37

Easy man, here's what I'd do:

So for example if its Chlamydia - the cure is Azithromycin. Get a prescription or whatever you need to get it, and just get multiple doses. (In India I know you don't need a prescription, so every country is different).

Now you just need her to take the pill. Honestly, I would just pull that shit out of a centrum bottle or another vitamin or like L-Lysine (its a big white pill like Azithromycin I think) or something, and be like hey try taking this its really healthy. And you take one too.

Now you just gotta avoid sex for 7-14 days. Just tell her you're doing a sexual cleanse, or spiritual cleanse, etc. or just tell her you hurt your frenulum (while masterbating or sex with her) and google said to avoid sex for 2 weeks until it heals.

*Note: I've never actually done this, but theoretically in my head, it makes sense. I do have a box of Azithromycin laying around tho that I got from India for like $2. (In the US that shit was like $40 for 2 pills.)

Post: #38

Get the antibiotics and pretend the pills are 5HTP. Easy game

Post: #39

any assistance in obtaining the antibios would be greatly appreciated. we should all have that conversation via PM.
btw the shot and azith didn't work the first time (if it was the same clap resurfacing and not the gf giving it to me) so they put my on doxy which is a 2x/day 7 day course on an empty stomach which means it'll be much harder to administer than a single dose.

Post: #40

Hmmmm. If things are at the stage where you're banging your GF just once in 50 days then I would assume she is also getting bangs on the side, no surveillance necessary.

So it's 50/50 between her or the fatty infecting you... or 100% BOTH OF THEM!

Post: #41

Any updates OP?

Post: #42

(09-04-2018 06:07 PM)Eugenics Wrote:  Any updates OP?

No way she was letting anyone near that phone so software not an option. PM me and I'll tell you what I ended up doing. (Would rather not have this turn up on an internet search)

Post: #43

Oh what a sorry story. Bacteria from a fattie

Post: #44

Edit

Post: #45

(09-05-2018 12:07 AM)maverik Wrote:  Eventually it was cured, but I still feel a burning feeling when urinating.

Sorry to say, but it sounds like you ain't cured. Unless you have a recurring UTI that just happens to have started at the same time. You need to get back on the antibiotics....

Post: #46

I don't know how it is in your country, but here, antibiotics are OTC. If that's the case, just take 2g azithromycin (for both Chlamydia/Gonorrhea). Tell your gf you got a UTI and this medication will clear it up. UTIs aren't just from sex anyway, so it's plausibly deniable enough that she should believe it. I had this situation before with my LTR (it was gonorrhea) and she bought it. GL.

Post: #47

(08-24-2018 01:49 PM)Longshanks Wrote:  Get the antibiotics and pretend the pills are 5HTP. Easy game

This, is pathetic. After 10 years, she has a right to know. As others mentioned, if he raw-dogged her, she probably caught it. Why not simply confess his affair and let her deal with it...

IMO Beta behavior to hide it and sneak.. Why sneak on his 10 year relationship?

Post: #48

(09-08-2018 09:12 AM)jmane Wrote:  This, is pathetic. After 10 years, she has a right to know. As others mentioned, if he raw-dogged her, she probably caught it. Why not simply confess his affair and let her deal with it...

IMO Beta behavior to hide it and sneak.. Why sneak on his 10 year relationship?

You say pathetic and beta, I say "what possible gain is there" in doing so

Post: #49

@TheGrowth: With all due respect, “what possible gain is there” is not the best response right now. It’s good for you to consider the option that this is a wake up call on where you are in your life right now in terms of personal relationships and how satisfied you are with your life.

What you are describing above is nothing short of toxic behavior towards a 10 year LTR. I’ve done my fair share of cheating so I’m not judging on that, what I’m trying to highlight is that the situation is a symptom of a shitty place you are in, rather than a little incident.

For a period of over 10 years you’ve not actually created a family with this woman after plenty of opportunities to do so. You’ve now proceeded to cheat on her (assuming generously this is the only side chick you’ve banged) with what so far has been described as low value fattie. In the process you are actively trying to get feedback from the community on how to try and avoid taking any responsibility for carrying and most probably already giving a disease with significant fertility risk.

Nothing of this gives me the idea that you are in a good place in this relationship and it has a positive impact on your life. Predominantly it gives off the vibe that you are dissatisfied and wiling to significantly degrade further the trust you’re given by this woman you’ve spent 10 years of your life with by making a cheating situation significantly worse (and yes injecting antibiotics in somebody who is unaware of this is a shitty move, however you want to play it).

And don’t get me wrong, I’ve been there. I’ve actively cheated for close to a year on a LTR that was a good woman but not the right fit for me, however due to multiple excuses I was procrastinating to actually end it. That included even developing an UTI that wasn’t an STD but sure felt like it and finding myself trying to claim a wild story about food bacteria and ‘freak accidents’. The whole process took a significant toll on my personal happiness and it took for me to end this relationship and actually walk-the-walk of abundance mentality for me to progress to a better place.

Basic math shows that this woman is probably already at the tail end of her healthy fertility years and yet you are actively trying to avoid having her having to understand she probably needs to be treated for this. Disregarding the morality of it, as I said pulling stuff like this for the sake of extra cash is something that will scar you and undermine your ability to trust and bond in your future relationships (cause let’s face it, if you’ve not created a family after 10 years, you are not seeing this woman as YOUR woman).

The ‘possible gain’ in this is not measurable in money that can be earned but in you maintaining (or looks like regaining) the ability to accept consequences and work towards a better self, mentally and in your relationships with women. Good luck.

Post: #50

Interesting thread. Tricky situation.

One question I have, not to take things off topic, but, can you pass on Gonoreah from kissing? Let's say I have it, I kiss my GF, she then blows me - can I obtain it this way? I think this happened in my case, but the girl and her doctor deny its possible. To add, if I get on anti-biotics, get clean, then proceed to kiss my gf - can I get it in my throat if she has it? Asking for a friend