Post: #26

RIP Chester Bennington

Not a tremendous fan of Linkin Park but they did push out some good music. I do agree the "coincidence" of multiple related musicians committing suicide is hard not to notice....

Especially with this song IMO the best...

Post: #27

Used to blast in the end and sing the tune when I was a teenager, had it as a ripped CD. Good memories.

Rest in piece way too young.

Post: #28

Linkin Park was definitely one of my favorite bands growing up. Depression is no joke, NOTHING wrong with getting help if u need it.......

Post: #29

Health and happiness over money, 100% of the time. Live well, gentlemen.

Post: #30

Suicide and drug overdoses are fast increasing in American men. There is certainly a growing sense of despair among this group, and while we can argue over the causes all day, it's present and it's something that every man should be aware of and cautious against.

Rio left an outstanding personal testimony, and to simply reinforce his point: The natural remedies, or preventions to depression that used to exist in society are fast depleting. The fabric of a healthy soul, a healthy society, meaningful inter-personal relations, purposeful living, and so forth, are going away or absent entirely.

This means that men need to be extra vigilant on their own temperament, and be pro-active to keep positive, sustainable, and healthy influences around them at all times. Also we should be sympathetic and caring to those that genuinely need help, be it through tough but positive love or merely having an open ear. Take the time to make personal connections and interact with others, don't think you're too special.

Post: #31

(07-20-2017 06:47 PM)Veloce Wrote:  Thanks for sharing that Rio, takes some guts to do that.

I have a cousin that committed suicide. 19 year old girl that was, by all objective standards, gorgeous. Grew up with 2 parents that loved her more than life itself and did everything they could to help her. She regularly saw counselors and therapists. No use.

It would be easy to say, "She's got everything going for her. Her youth, physical beauty, family that loves her, her whole life ahead of her." That's what I said when I found out she died.

It's easy to play sideline commentator when your head is in order. I get moments of deep depression and even still I can see a light at the end of the tunnel. But I also get glimpses of the pain and hopelessness that some unfortunate individuals experience, and it seems like no matter what they do they're simply unable to pull themselves out of it.

This is terrible and I hate hearing about this happening to people now. I used to think they were weak and selfish, but now I just feel for them.

Very few people can understand why someone with such a bright future would kill themselves. The pain going through her head each day was just too much for her to take.

I used to think depression stemmed from outside influences. Getting picked on, parents not being good people, losing your gf, etc. Those things influence depression, but IMO, are not the root cause. A lot of people have those things happen, and worse, and don't think of suicide. I think it's the people who are already severally depressed, or prone to depression, who end up taking their lives once those problems hit. Straw that broke the camels back.

Someone mentioned above that Chester needed to get over his dad molesting him as a child like many other people do. I think the thing here is that he was probably already prone to severe depression, and having to live with such a horrible childhood pushed him over the edge. Had he not been prone to depression, he quite possibly would have gotten over it and moved on with his life.

I'm lucky that my problems are mild compared to some out there. I can only imagine how much people are tormented before they finally decide enough is enough.

I also firmly believe my problems are related to digestive, gut and hormonal issues. I see a light at the end of the tunnel to my problems. Some people just see no hope.

Post: #32

(07-20-2017 05:26 PM)RioNomad Wrote:  People who have never dealt with real depression won't understand how someone like him or Chris Cornell, or anyone, can kill themselves. I honestly never did either until the past year, which has been a miserable and tormenting year for me.

Rio, have you tried a strong dose of shrooms (psilocybin)? There has been a number of research studies that have shown that a one time dose has permanently cured serious depression in many people.

Post: #33

(07-21-2017 05:16 PM)BB1 Wrote:  

(07-20-2017 05:26 PM)RioNomad Wrote:  People who have never dealt with real depression won't understand how someone like him or Chris Cornell, or anyone, can kill themselves. I honestly never did either until the past year, which has been a miserable and tormenting year for me.

Rio, have you tried a strong dose of shrooms (psilocybin)? There has been a number of research studies that have shown that a one time dose has permanently cured serious depression in many people.

I did mushrooms once when I was in my late teens/early twenties. I have a friend who swears by acid to cure anxiety/depression, but honestly I think I could get violent on strong psychedelics. I don't think I want to try them.

I have heard of Ketamine clinics helping people too. I'd be more willing to try that, though I believe my problems stem from a fucked up gut/digestion/hormones.

Post: #34

Resquicat in Pace.

Post: #35

Been away from the forum for a while, and coincidentally saw this story. My mother committed suicide years ago. She left behind 3 kids, a husband, and a seemingly great life with no troubled background, such as Bennington's abuse or alcohol problems. Nobody knows why people resort to this, but I can say with 100% certainty that the collateral damage is massive. I wouldn't wish the emotional trauma on my worst enemy, and the abandonment and sadness is something that stays with one forever who loses a loved one like this.

For whatever reason, depression is an epidemic in the modern world and can be absolutely lethal. The worst part is that there is never a black and white solution, and the drugs that the medical industry prescribes often make the situation worse.

Feel very sorry for his family, and especially his 6 kids. With enough time the shock will subside, but there will always be this asterisk whenever their father is mentioned, even in a positive manner. When you recollect on one who died from old age, you can tell a story, laugh, and know they lived a full life and it ended the way nature intended. When my mother is brought up in a positive light, there is a very quick smile, followed by sadness at the fact that she committed such a grave mistake. Just no logical reason for there to be a premature end, with so many things to live for.

I forgive my mother, and know she is in a better place as it is unhealthy to live in the past and have hateful emotions. But I know she did the wrong thing, as did Chester Bennington, Scott Weiland, Robin Williams, and others.

I wish an "It's a Wonderful Life" event could happen to all of those that are majorly depressed, where they would realize how much of a gift their existence is and to persevere through their problems and overcome their demons.

Always was a Linkin Park fan, and Bennington created some great music throughout the years. Unfortunately, his superb work will be overshadowed by this traumatic event, and it just didn't need to be this way. Hate reading stories like this.

Apologize for the long post, have never really opened up about this to anyone besides family.

Post: #36

It is crazy to think how someone who had the money, fame and everything that comes with it, things that all people want a taste of, wont satisfy.

Some sober words from Ecclesiastes:

What do people gain from all their labors at which they toil under the sun? Generations come and generations go.....I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure.My heart took delight in all my labor, and this was the reward for all my toil.
11 Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve,everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun...... Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.

Post: #37

His last song "Heavy" almost seemed like a foreshadowing of things to come. He was truly a musical genius, unfortunately, with genius often comes mental illness. I used to love their music, but a lot of it is quite dark. The song Faint is probably one of my favorite songs it seems to be more upbeat.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYU-8IFcDPw

Post: #38

I do find it an interesting quirk of fate, whereby, leftist type folk promote natural selection & evolution to the nth degree.

Yet when someone does natural selection the 'wrong' way.
All of a sudden there's the need for much gnashing of teeth & wringing of wrists...

Post: #39

Truely sad to lose a piece of my childhood this way. I'm typing this as I listen to their most recent album and cant help but feel this event was foreshadowed.

Maybe I'm tainted with the bias formed by the actual event but its just a thought.

I recall when I was younger and listening to this music that it was quite dark and stopped for a short period of time thinking that it may influence me negatively.

Yet I enjoyed the pure sound of the music nonetheless.

These were the thoughts of a 3rd grader listening on speakers while playing runescape at his grandmothers house.

As for the thoughts on depression, I can relate to the feeling of being trapped in my own head, the feelings of suffocating in negativity, and the thought of ending it all in hopes of maybe getting a restart in life at the end of it.

They were hard times, and everyone I knew was completely oblivious to the fact of what was truly going on in my head.

The only things which were able to pull me through those times was the love I had for all the people in my life, the love they had for me, and the dying hopes for a future..

The thought of how selfish I would be if i actually went through with it (A belief I gained thanks to RvF); how much pain I would cause to everyone just so that I could feel some relief, gave me that drive to get myself together.

I don't want to imagine what could of happened if I did not have the people i have in my life, and even RvF at a more recent time.

I've never told people about this before and posting it on RvF just relieves the load on my chest, without the having to unnecessarily worry people.

I agree with everything RioNomad has posted and would only like to add that finding something to live for can make all the difference.

It could be something like your dog, your desire to leave something behind, your projects, your kids, ANYTHING.

Theres always something worth living for beyond the pain you may be going through.

Post: #40

People often don't understand when celebrities commit suicide.

There are a few explanations for that:

1) Wealth exacerbates your own faults - if you are fucked up before, you are likely more fucked up when you are given the means to fuck up your life more

2) Anti-depressants - they cause long-term even greater psychotic issues. Physical reasons for depressions can be quickly resolved by a high-potency multi and L-tryptophan at doses of 500-2000mg per day. Most of those pharma-prescribed legal drugs destroy the health far greater than admitted - Eminem and other stars talked about the horrors of those legal drugs which have withdrawal-symptoms greater than long-term heroin users.

3) Psychologically celebrities face other pressures - while I think that if they stayed away from drugs and psychotropics, then most problems would disappear, it is sometimes not as simple as that. There is research out there that musicians who produce disruptive music tend to have some disruptive tendencies. While disruptive music can be good for breaking up mental patterns and some rebellion, it also creates some internal vibrational havoc within a person. There are studies out there on the effects of harmonious and disharmonious music on plants and animals - plants growing better and cows giving more milk when listening to Bach than Iron Maiden. There is no reason to believe that music would not have a similar effect on humans.

Does that mean that musicians should not do the music they like? No - but it means that some musicians of the more disharmony kind should listen more to harmonious music in private to help them clean their pallet. Another point is also the extremely loud acoustics at many concerts that impact many musicians way more than currently admitted.

I am sure that future scientific literature will prove me right on all 3 points above.

Post: #41

^ Damn good post. And I happen to agree with you on each point.

Post: #42

I completely agree with whoever said the bit about depressed people needing an "It's a Wonderful Life" type experience. Think about it like this -- Had Chris Cornell not chosen to hang himself, would his friend Chester Bennington have done it two months later on Cornell's birthday? Highly doubtful. It may have still happened at some point, one way or another, but it's unlikely it would've played out how it did. Would Cornell still have chosen to take his own life if he realized it may have contributed to his friend's suicide and depriving six children of their father (nine children if you count Cornell's as well).

Post: #43

Fuckin pussy.

Post: #44

(07-20-2017 05:26 PM)RioNomad Wrote:  People who have never dealt with real depression won't understand how someone like him or Chris Cornell, or anyone, can kill themselves. I honestly never did either until the past year, which has been a miserable and tormenting year for me.

I'm 99% sure I'd never kill myself, but I can easily understand how someone can now. It's like you're trapped in solitary confinement and you can't escape, because you're trapped in your head. Terrible thoughts constantly bombard you in the worst possible way and you can't get away from them.

I see Joe Rogan, who I honestly never cared for that much, talking about how he doesn't understand depression or how Cornell could kill himself and how people should just exercise and they will feel great. It doesn't work that way, and if you've never truly been depressed, not just feeling blue, you can never really understand. When you have real depression, exercise won't make you feel much better. If you feel down and blue, exercise absolutely will make you feel great, and it does help with depression, but not nearly to the same extent as people think.

I even posted on here before about how I thought my cousin was a big pussy for being depressed and suicidal, and how he needed to hit the gym, get laid, and get the fuck over it. Now I understand him. Something has changed in me the past couple of years and it's really fucked me up. I never ever struggled with anxiety and depression in my life until recently, so it has been a big shock to me.

I wanted to write this just because I'm sure other people here are in the same situation. I think it's a fucking epidemic in the modern world, for a lot of reasons that I won't get into. But I know a few things (and a person or two) have been helping me, so I thought this would be a good place to share.

1. Get on a sleep schedule. This one is hard for me, but I'm slowly getting into more of a pattern of going to bed and waking up at set times, and not sleeping until 12-4PM like a lazy fuck. The earlier I can wake up, the better I feel. I am also more productive, which has been extremely hard for me. If I wake up and do something, ANYTHING, I feel better.

2. Use a lightbox. You guys all know the thread here, read it. It helps and feels good to sit under it in the morning. I put a big stupid fake smile on my face while I do it. Fake smiles actually make you feel better. Good posture also.

3. Eat healthy. High fat, moderate protein, low carb is the winner for me. It's hard to follow, but when I do, I feel so much better psychically and mentally. I have very fucked up digestion and stomach issues which contribute a great deal to my problems. I'm in the process of fixing this, but as of now, a high fat diet seems to really help. Oils, nuts, grass fed butter, etc. Also, eat ENOUGH CALORIES. For me personally, if I don't eat enough, I become a madman. My head goes crazy and I can't control where my mind wanders. Even eating crap food like a PB&J with a glass of milk usually takes off the edge. Try not to eat crap food, but for me, crap food is better than no food. Fucking Taco Bell $5 big box gets me all of the time lol.

4. Exercise. Yes, I know what I wrote above about Rogan, but it does help. Just not in the way it helps when you're just feeling bummed out. I don't leave the gym feeling like a gladiator anymore, but lifting regularly helps. Sometimes when I feel like shit I'll force myself to put on gym clothes and say "I'm just going to go hit 5 sets of 10 reps of rows, and if I want to, I'll leave." The thing is I have NEVER actually left, and often times end up staying 1.5 hours and crushing back and having a great workout. Pick your favorite and easiest compound exercise and just go do it, even if it isn't much. Working out during the day is better for me too. I get outside, lift, and don't spend so much time zoned out at the computer.

5. GET OUTSIDE. This is a big one. I work online, and it is fucking miserable to stare off into a screen all day. Get outside and walk. Keep your head up high, shoulders back, and walk like you're the fucking man. After 30-60 minutes I feel much, much better. It also is a great time to think on ways to FIX your problems, instead of laying in bed dwelling on them and feeling down. This is when I have my best ideas and feel the most hope.

6. Remember there IS hope. You're in a hole, a fucking deep and shitty one, but you can get out of it. It'll take time and effort, even when you don't think you have any effort to give, but try to do one or two of the things on this list and you'll start to feel a little better each time, and go from there.

Meds didn't work for me, and I'd never take them again. Last ditch effort and they were garbage for me. Maybe they work for you, but not for me. I don't want them.

I almost just deleted this, but I think I'm going to post it anyways. Even though everyone on the internet is a badass that fucks 10's, if this helps one person, then it was worth posting and making myself look like a pussy lol.

Off to crush some legs.

Dark Night(s) of the Soul! Happens to me as well..

Post: #45

(07-21-2017 07:39 PM)Durango Wrote:  Been away from the forum for a while, and coincidentally saw this story. My mother committed suicide years ago. She left behind 3 kids, a husband, and a seemingly great life with no troubled background, such as Bennington's abuse or alcohol problems. Nobody knows why people resort to this, but I can say with 100% certainty that the collateral damage is massive. I wouldn't wish the emotional trauma on my worst enemy, and the abandonment and sadness is something that stays with one forever who loses a loved one like this.

For whatever reason, depression is an epidemic in the modern world and can be absolutely lethal. The worst part is that there is never a black and white solution, and the drugs that the medical industry prescribes often make the situation worse.

Feel very sorry for his family, and especially his 6 kids. With enough time the shock will subside, but there will always be this asterisk whenever their father is mentioned, even in a positive manner. When you recollect on one who died from old age, you can tell a story, laugh, and know they lived a full life and it ended the way nature intended. When my mother is brought up in a positive light, there is a very quick smile, followed by sadness at the fact that she committed such a grave mistake. Just no logical reason for there to be a premature end, with so many things to live for.

I forgive my mother, and know she is in a better place as it is unhealthy to live in the past and have hateful emotions. But I know she did the wrong thing, as did Chester Bennington, Scott Weiland, Robin Williams, and others.

I wish an "It's a Wonderful Life" event could happen to all of those that are majorly depressed, where they would realize how much of a gift their existence is and to persevere through their problems and overcome their demons.

Always was a Linkin Park fan, and Bennington created some great music throughout the years. Unfortunately, his superb work will be overshadowed by this traumatic event, and it just didn't need to be this way. Hate reading stories like this.

Apologize for the long post, have never really opened up about this to anyone besides family.

I think its typical for people to defend or attack.. Lets take a different tact..

Its neither wrong nor right for them to do so.. We can hope and pray that we wish they had access to more alternatives & solutions than to have gotten so exhausted as to give up..

The battle is inner and it cannot be easily understood or explained.. it is what it is..

We can hope, pray and wish that ourselves, people around us and the world do not have to go through it .. and if they do.. hopefully they are able to come out of it with help support & other processes that help cleansing / catharasis and renewal from within..

In meditation & spiritual circles and maybe some religious circles it may be referred to as the dark night of the soul.. it may not have rooting or login the external world and no one can see it or feel it.. but that persons inner being is.. something shattered and its not easy to quickly super glue..

There are many mechanisms that different cultures have used to deal with such phases.. And from research and predictions more people will go through such stuff in this era... lets hope they find the right means to dig themselves out..

Post: #46

xmlenigma

Could you elaborate on your last paragraph?

Post: #47

(07-21-2017 08:10 PM)sonoran_ Wrote:  It is crazy to think how someone who had the money, fame and everything that comes with it, things that all people want a taste of, wont satisfy.

Some sober words from Ecclesiastes:

What do people gain from all their labors at which they toil under the sun? Generations come and generations go.....I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure.My heart took delight in all my labor, and this was the reward for all my toil.
11 Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve,everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun...... Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.

I've read through Ecclesiastes numerous times, trying to understand the wisdom there. I feel like my life has no meaning, or at least, I have felt this way. I find I'm not able to simply say it outright as I initially typed it.

I'm somewhat bitter towards God, yet I still believe. I was not able to father children, so I have no descendants. I lived far too long as a blue pill man, and now my youth is behind me. The version of America and Western Civilization that I grew up in is gone and rejected by a huge percentage of the current population. I have no cause to devote myself to. All I can do is distract myself and engage in hedonism until I get old and die.

While I've considered life in these terms, it's obviously a poor way to look at things. To even follow the line of thought above demands that I figure out something more substantive to live for.

First of all, while I never had children, I do have loved ones in my life, who make me happy to spend time with, and who I care deeply about. Some actual family, some I've bonded with to where I feel they have become family, and some that are high quality long term friends. I also have a very interesting job, and a great circle of co-workers. So, while my life has not been perfect, and I still have some issues, I'm actually quite blessed.

Also, I think one of the answers is to reject this introspective notion that you have to have some kind of narrative "meaning" to your life. Life is messy. You can't understand or explain everything. As the saying goes, "Life is for living". It's better to live in the moment. Involve yourself in interesting things. Take in beauty, from nature and art. Enjoy pleasant company. Have sex, do drugs, listen to music, travel to exotic places.

Count your blessings, don't dwell on life's difficulties, and live each day as well as you can. I think this is very similar to the conclusions in Ecclesiastes.

Finally, I'd like to mention that this forum and the brotherhood I feel here is one of the great positives in my life. I love you guys!

Post: #48

(07-22-2017 01:48 PM)LeoneVolpe Wrote:  I completely agree with whoever said the bit about depressed people needing an "It's a Wonderful Life" type experience. Think about it like this -- Had Chris Cornell not chosen to hang himself, would his friend Chester Bennington have done it two months later on Cornell's birthday? Highly doubtful. It may have still happened at some point, one way or another, but it's unlikely it would've played out how it did. Would Cornell still have chosen to take his own life if he realized it may have contributed to his friend's suicide and depriving six children of their father (nine children if you count Cornell's as well).

Speaking honestly, and maybe somewhat callously, I'm disappointed to learn that Cornell was even friends with Bennington. It speaks to his decline as a musician.

Artists must be judged on their output, not their fame. If we are being objective, Cornell never improved on Soundgarden. Audioslave was okay.

And in that spirit, Linkin Park must be recognised for what they are: corporate slurry, garbage. They never had any justification for existence, not even nostalgic value. They are a mockery of a band.

Bennington must have know this about himself. Sucks that he died; the guy was obviously disturbed. But he achieved nothing worthy of respect.

Post: #49

Suicide among musicians really seems to be confined to white rockers. You don't see too many rappers offing themselves lol.

Post: #50

(07-24-2017 01:13 PM)TigerMandingo Wrote:  Suicide among musicians really seems to be confined to white rockers. You don't see too many rappers offing themselves lol.

White rock music has fetishised beta cucks since indie and nu-metal.

Indie music was the origin of hipster fagdom we know and love today. The irony, the lampooning of masculinity, are all generic traits. Bands like Pavement are archetypal.

Grunge was a rejection of faux-masculinity in 80's hair metal. Bands like Dinosaur Jr. are extremely cucked. In one song, the singer likens himself to a dog, looking for attention and wagging his tail.

On the other hand, bands like Nirvana and Soundgarden distance themselves from the overt jock mentality, but don't lose their balls completely. Cobain spits at the TV cameras. Cornell is still topless; the music is heavy.

Nu-metal: in a degrading appeal to authenticity, Jon Davis of Korn wears child molestation on his sleeve. He openly cries about his dad on Korn's first album. It was edgy at the time.

Linkin Park are the final wave of nu-metal. Chester was hired by the record company to join the band. He's a shill. That's why I'm surprised he had the balls to kill himself. He weeps for money, like a heroin addict on the subway.

Suicide is the only authentic thing Chester Bennington ever did.