Post: #26

(03-30-2017 08:00 AM)doej610 Wrote:  Should i ask her about it or just stay on the origional plan?

From my point of view, talking to a girl about a wrong behaviour is pretty much useless.
First, it makes you look weaker, as something was able to touch / hurt you.

Second, they have a great memory when it comes to relationships : what she did, what you did, everything is stored in her head.
So when you go silent, show less affection, less desire to see her, begin to flirt with other girls, she'll understand she did something wrong to you; she'll then look at all what she did in the near past, to see what pushed you away.

Either she wants to stay with you and will automatically change her behaviour, or she'll continue disrecpecting you, clearly stating you should next her.

I'll add that never saying what upsets you (even denying anything does), keeps her in a state where she doesn't know if you're pleased with her, and she loves that uncertainty.
She'll then think about you as a drama source, while you're never saying anything to create it.

Are you going to be a loving partner or a distant guy (it's important to assume both roles), the next time she'll see you?
She can't be sure and that simple fact is key, to have her totally yours.

Post: #27

(03-30-2017 08:00 AM)doej610 Wrote:  She is very conservative on what shes posts on fb/insta. However i comoketely agree that this more than likely did not happen by chance. Should i ask her about it or just stay on the origional plan?

Stay completely radio silent. Let her come to you...and she will

Post: #28

UPDATE: we had previously made plans to hangout friday, however she just texted me saying that she is now going on a church retreat. I have not sent a "seen receipt" yet but I am assuming I should just ignore this until she apologizes.

Post: #29

(03-30-2017 08:25 PM)doej610 Wrote:  UPDATE: we had previously made plans to hangout friday, however she just texted me saying that she is now going on a church retreat. I have not sent a "seen receipt" yet but I am assuming I should just ignore this until she apologizes.

She's testing you.

1.Don't blink. (Dont respond)

2. Start gaming other girls.

This may not be what you want...but the hard cold truth about keeping a girl this age is that you have to not really care if you don't The best way to not really care is to have spares)

Post: #30

Every man probably faced this at some point. My take:

- Downgrade her (Less time, less attention, meet girls)
- Nobody lies only once so operate under the assumption of her lying in the past, present or future
- Let her back in only if you sense real remorse. Among other things, how long/hard she tries to spin it as "no big deal" or shift the blame to someone else (you, the other guy, etc) are good indicators

You're young and you're ahead of your peers since you're here. No need to compromise unnecessarily

Post: #31

Update: texted me last night again with "babe?". I woke up this morning to "good morning, im worried are you mad?" I said "disappointed"
Her reply was "am i getting the silent treatment?"

ALSO should i move this to the "what should i text next thread?"
Should i continue silence or say we will talk about it later?

Post: #32

(03-31-2017 08:57 AM)doej610 Wrote:  Update: texted me last night again with "babe?". I woke up this morning to "good morning, im worried are you mad?" I said "disappointed"
Her reply was "am i getting the silent treatment?"

ALSO should i move this to the "what should i text next thread?"
Should i continue silence or say we will talk about it later?

"Im worried are you mad?" means its working. She blinked first. Just hold tight. Don't respond. We know youre going to want to...but don't. Youre at a critical juncture

How would you act if you were banging 3 other hotter chicks on a daily rotation?

Let the "doom" (see my post above) in her own mind do the work for you

This is text book Dread Game 101

Just wait for the "I"m sorry, I didn't think it was a big deal, yada yada yada"...it's coming.

Post: #33

well i have continued the silent treatment,
the result has been 2 more unanswered texts,

1: may i see you sometime today? as well as her waiting in the hallway outside my class however she did not see me walk by.
2: "damnit jon, I tried, have a wonderful weekend."

She seems to be getting upset my consern is that she is missing the point of why i am not giving her more of my time.

Post: #34

Keep up with the silent treatment, if you respond now she will be under the assumption that only a few moody/worried sounding texts will be enough to blow things over.

Wait until you feel like she has accepted what she has done and is willing to make up for it (you might never feel like you can trust her, if so I would suggest a serious downgrade or ghost her)

I had an ex try to make me jealous by casually chatting to her male manager outside of work, I glanced at her phone and saw the texts (he was flirting with her)

After I left I ignored her for 2 weeks while receiving a barrage of texts like the ones you're getting.

A few days later she turned up outside my work, waited for me to come outside then ran up crying saying she was sorry and had also bought me a new watch.

If you're that important she will make more effort than a few taps on a phone.

Post: #35

(03-31-2017 12:11 PM)doej610 Wrote:  my consern is that she is missing the point of why i am not giving her more of my time.

She knows, have no doubt about that.
She plays ignorant to test your frame.

Post: #36

(03-31-2017 12:11 PM)doej610 Wrote:  well i have continued the silent treatment,
the result has been 2 more unanswered texts,

1: may i see you sometime today? as well as her waiting in the hallway outside my class however she did not see me walk by.
2: "damnit jon, I tried, have a wonderful weekend."

She seems to be getting upset my consern is that she is missing the point of why i am not giving her more of my time.

No...she gets it. Believe me. She's just testing you (even though she may not even be conscious of it)

"damnit jon, I tried" means "Im thinking about you and worried that youre not thinking about me but I'm a girl and as such I don't want to acknowledge that I did anything wrong"

"have a wonderful weekend." means "I'm worried you're out there having a great time without me, and why aren't you thinking about me? what are you doing? are you flirting with other girls? having sex?"....and on and on the hamster wheel will spin

That's exactly what you want. That's Dread Game

It's even what she wants (though she doesn't know it). This all started because she was bored and sent foot pictures to some random dude as a way to interject some "danger/ drama" into her life Give her this drama

Stay completely silent until you get the remorseful / contrition text (it's coming). LET HER OWN FEARS / DESIRES mental conflict do the work for you

2 more unanswered texts, and her waiting for you is proof that it's working

Post: #37

By the way here's a more "proactive" dread game via text game I came up with a few years back and used several times with great effect.

I could tell a chick was going cold on me so I did the following (I posted it in another thread somewhere):

Her "Hey you there?"

PT "The AT&T subscriber you are trying to reach is no longer receiving your messages"

Her "Ha ha, very funny"

Cut and pasted for instant response

PT "The AT&T subscriber you are trying to reach is no longer receiving your messages"

Her "Seriously?"

PT "The AT&T subscriber you are trying to reach is no longer receiving your messages"

Her "OMG...are you kidding?"

PT "The AT&T subscriber you are trying to reach is no longer receiving your messages"

After a couple days of silence

Her "Hey PT...are you still blocking me?"

PT "The AT&T subscriber you are trying to reach is longer receiving your drama"

Her "I was having a bad day. I'm sorry PT, "

PT "Come over and prove it"

Post: #38

Update on this?

By the way, that "fake block" also works great on ex-wife's when you are trying to move them from texting to email. I used a variation of that

"ERROR 23 - Text messages to this number can not be delivered"

Post: #39

Update: she tried calling me in lab. I ignored it and slipped up and texted "cant talk working on project"
my reasoning for this was I was assuming she was calling to apologize.
she never said anything
Going out tonight- should i put this on my snap story?

Post: #40

(03-31-2017 04:24 PM)doej610 Wrote:  Update: she tried calling me in lab. I ignored it and slipped up and texted "cant talk working on project"
my reasoning for this was I was assuming she was calling to apologize.
she never said anything
Going out tonight- should i put this on my snap story?

"To assume is to make an ass out of u and me"...my high school baseball coach

she never said anything because you haven't made her say anything.

Either she cares (desire) enough about your and her relationship that thought of (fear) losing it overcomes her reluctance to admit her error... or it doesn't

Haven't you yet noticed how she's increasingly desperate to talk? How often does she normally actually call you?

Every time you acknowledge her with a text, ANY RESPONSE, at all right now turns down the "pressure" that her own mind is exerting

That response wasn't terrible but no response would have been better

Post: #41

OP, wether it works with this girl or not, you'll have to correct your scarcity mentality.
Your reactions show you care too much for a girl, who disrespected you and shows clear signs of future infidelity (if it's not already the case).

Go meet other women, while keeping this one in the backburner.
When you have options, you don't care about this kind of drama.
Your mind is more at ease and you appear more attractive to girls.

Let me ask you a question : let's say this foot fetisher attention whore sends you this text.
"Doe, I thought a lot about us, and I think we should see other people. I'm not happy with you anymore."
Would you be sad for weeks / months?
Or think it's her loss, and you'll have her soon replaced with a better female?

Post: #42

While I am no 'game' expert, I doubt that ignoring texts and/or calls over an extended period is any meaningful way of trying to communicate something important to your woman. It smacks of passive-aggressiveness, and shows possibly that you are butthurt about the whole experience.

Those are things you may not want to show.

The moment you learned about the whole thing is the moment you should have calmly warned her not to repeat it -if she wanted to continue to be a part of your life (now that's dread). But since you probably didn't, and the moment has since passed, you now have to go into damage control mode before this goes any further.

'Women need to be led' appears to be the mantra around these boards. Ask yourself, OP; Are the actions you currently are taking signs of a man who is leading? A man in control of the situation? And since its well understood that women are emotional, do you seriously believe that your girl will come to a logical conclusion about why you've gone radio silent on her?

Without being emotional, find a way to make this girl understand that she crossed the line, and shouldn't repeat it in the future.

Lead from the front.

Post: #43

(04-01-2017 08:05 AM)Uhondo Wrote:  While I am no 'game' expert, I doubt that ignoring texts and/or calls over an extended period is any meaningful way of trying to communicate something important to your woman. It smacks of passive-aggressiveness, and shows possibly that you are butthurt about the whole experience.

Those are things you may not want to show.

The moment you learned about the whole thing is the moment you should have calmly warned her not to repeat it -if she wanted to continue to be a part of your life (now that's dread). But since you probably didn't, and the moment has since passed, you now have to go into damage control mode before this goes any further.

'Women need to be led' appears to be the mantra around these boards. Ask yourself, OP; Are the actions you currently are taking signs of a man who is leading? A man in control of the situation? And since its well understood that women are emotional, do you seriously believe that your girl will come to a logical conclusion about why you've gone radio silent on her?

Without being emotional, find a way to make this girl understand that she crossed the line, and shouldn't repeat it in the future.

Lead from the front.

He let her know it was the wrong thing to do, and she knows it. He led and she didn't want to follow without a fight. What are you going to do? Use all your leverage and every ounce of your perceived SMV to correct this behaviour leaving you with little social capital in the future? No. He doesn't have that much leverage and probably not a whole lot of higher perceived SMV, this is not a move that is accessible to OP.

It may sound passive agressive, and it may sound butthurt, and it may even be those things. From the outside looking in however, it's perceived as aloofness. It shows that the OP will not play her games and is ready to lose her at any time. This stuff works. The further you deviate from that strategy when settling little disputes the more your sacrifice in terms of social capital with a woman. In the end when it's done correctly you come out with more leverage than you left with. There is a little risk that she doesn't like you enough to bend a knee and apologize, but there are always risks and this one has pretty good odds. If she does - good. If she doesn't - good, she obviously didn't care enough in the first place.

He's doing the right thing. He's keeping his frame and keeping it moving. He fucked up a few times responding to her at all and that may taint an otherwise beautiful strategy but I would call my bookie and bet she gives the long "sorry" text within a week.

Post: #44

(04-01-2017 08:05 AM)Uhondo Wrote:  While I am no 'game' expert, I doubt that ignoring texts and/or calls over an extended period is any meaningful way of trying to communicate something important to your woman. It smacks of passive-aggressiveness, and shows possibly that you are butthurt about the whole experience.

Those are things you may not want to show.

The moment you learned about the whole thing is the moment you should have calmly warned her not to repeat it -if she wanted to continue to be a part of your life (now that's dread). But since you probably didn't, and the moment has since passed, you now have to go into damage control mode before this goes any further.

'Women need to be led' appears to be the mantra around these boards. Ask yourself, OP; Are the actions you currently are taking signs of a man who is leading? A man in control of the situation? And since its well understood that women are emotional, do you seriously believe that your girl will come to a logical conclusion about why you've gone radio silent on her?

Without being emotional, find a way to make this girl understand that she crossed the line, and shouldn't repeat it in the future.

Lead from the front.

Here's a "game" lesson then.

You want lure a cat you use a piece of fish. Using a nice piece of broccoli wont get you very far


You lead a 20 girl via her emotions (hind brain).

You want to try "leading" her with logic and reason?...good luck with that

Post: #45

Thought this was a troll thread so late to the party, but listen: it's a couple freakin foot pics! Not tits, and no, she wasn't banging your best friend or your father. Damn, some of you guys get worked up easily.

I was banging a girl who did something similar when she was younger, and actually she was also raised Christian (and overseas). I forget the exact details but basically she thought she was doing a modeling gig and wound up meeting the guy a couple times and he took photos of her feet in different shoes and jewelry and then something seemed off and she didn't respond again and later figured out it was probably a foot fetish thing and her feet were floating around the interweb on fetish websites somewhere.

Know what I said when I found out? "Oh damn, I thought your feet looked familiar!" got a laugh and got over it.

Maybe some of you are thinking about this like a 30something guy who's had triple digit women through his bed, not a 20 yo former virgin Christian girl. They are incredibly sheltered. If you didn't know about foot fetishism would you think that someone could jerk off to feet? I sure wouldn't... Every little thing doesn't have to be a shit test. The best way to dominate a woman is with humor. Give her shit about being naive and stupid, tell her you have a project where you need to tie her up and bang her in the ass and take pictures. Make her feel foolish but in a joking way where she won't be able to be angry about it and can only respond with submissive laughter, and she'll be looking to you for guidance to lead her through the tangled web of internet fetishes in the future.

OP, from your posts in this thread I promise you that she doesn't think you're out there banging other girls right now. At this point I think your best option would be to stop acting like a butthurt child over nothing, and pretend like nothing happened. Christ man, if this is a DQ for relationship material you're going to be awfully lonely in life.