Post: #1

To all the magic genies on the forum,

So I've been dating a girl for past three months. She had come out of an LTR of five years six months prior, and gone traveling around Asia, and just gotten back to London. I chatted her up in a bar a few years ago and we randomly crossed paths after she came back and hooked up.

She's 30 this year, I'm 33.

Long story short, she's trying to get me to commit to something long-term and fast. I like her, she's an 8/10 in my books, smart, successful, good for her age, we get along very well. I asked her why she broke up with her last LTR and she said the guy wouldn't commit after 5 years.

However, I just can't help but feel so beta about all of this - whilst I like her a lot, I keep getting thoughts that:

1) I could do much better successfully (based on past experience), going after the hot 25 year olds in the clubs/bars as thankfully I've got better than average looks/confidence/game

2) I feel like i'm picking up the scraps of someone else's baggage - as if the previous guy and her had this classical wing it in your 20s thing and then now she's trying to find a husband in her 30s style……

I get her position too - now that she's hit 30s, she's on the clock.

Thoughts? common sense? maybe the hairs on my neck are just standing because of nothing?

Post: #2

You're answering your own question.
1) and 2) seem very clear to me.

Listen to your guts.

Post: #3

I think you are overthinking things too much. I would be worried for the opposite ( If the girl could not be in in a relationship for more than a month).
You said you liked her a lot even at the point you created a thread, then go for it. That's it!!

Please don't mind the age, in the past years I have dated many girls and the best relationship was with a 33 old.
Is she later tells you that she looks for LTR, and you feel not prepared, then you can eject. But as for now just tell her you want to know her better.

Post: #4

If you see this girl as the one and want to have kids with her, how soon do you realistically think you'll get to popping out kids? One year, two years? How much time does she have before she needs fertility help or IVF?

She hears her biological clock ticking loudly, it's up to you whether you want it to dictate the schedule of your life.

Post: #5

I think I'd be more concerned about the Asia carousel tour after her breakup rather than the fact she was with the dude for five years. It's just your turn.

That said, trust your gut on this one. It seems pretty obvious which way your gut is telling you

Post: #6

(01-09-2017 06:38 PM)styleiconx Wrote:  To all the magic genies on the forum,

So I've been dating a girl for past three months. She had come out of an LTR of five years six months prior, and gone traveling around Asia, and just gotten back to London. I chatted her up in a bar a few years ago and we randomly crossed paths after she came back and hooked up.

She's 30 this year, I'm 33.

Long story short, she's trying to get me to commit to something long-term and fast. I like her, she's an 8/10 in my books, smart, successful, good for her age, we get along very well.



Thoughts? common sense? maybe the hairs on my neck are just standing because of nothing?

Translation:

Her "Im looking for someone to rescue me from the consequences of all my previous bad decisions which are looming large and fast now"

If youre 33 your future wife should be about 13 right now...not 30

Post: #7

Common sense says, yes you can do better, yes this chick wants to get married and have kids, and yes she's pushing for it.

You've got 2 options:

Option 1: Bail, your gut made you write this post, and you don't think you're ready for this.

Option 2: Feel things out since she seems pretty cool, hangout see where it goes. BUT observe her actions and see how she acts.

There's nothing wrong with dating a cool cute chick - but don't waste your time and hers either if shit gets serious and you aren't seeing eye to eye.

To be honest, she isn't wife material to you, you know, we know it, and the only one that doesn't is her.

Post: #8

Nothing to lose by giving it a go, enjoy her and see what she has to offer.