Post: #1

Hey guys,

first of all I'm not even sure if this belongs in the newbie forum but I have been trying to figure out where to put this thread and yet seem to not be able to figure out where exactly.

I'm not necessarely a noob as I'm 28 and with now well over 100 bangs, mostly with very beautiful women who other guys would kill to be with. But that's exactly the issue. I've always had this big thing of reaching over 100 bangs, and of banging extremely hot women. Now that both has been accomplished, it kind of feels like a totally useless and meaningless skill to have or to be in.

I've been becoming basically the male equivalent of the 1000 cock stare. I just seem very unable to be able to bond, or trust women after seeing the dark side and this leads me to have an extreme approach anxiety which wasn't there before. It feels like I've accomplished the end of the videogame, if there's any analogy I can find.

I'm not a super good looking guy but I lift, just came back from a sunny vacation and definitely stand out in the country I live. I counted today that I got eyefucked today about 9 times while going to the office and then going to the coffee shop. All different women, one of them which I thought was very gorgeous. However, while last year I would have turned around and just directly opened her up, I just stood there for 2 seconds and thought "ugh... fuck it. What's the point"

This has been the way things have been going lately, and the fact is that its not like I have a steady FWB either right now. I just simply get absolutely anxious and somehow while I used to love experiencing rejection and finding ways around it, nowadays the thought of it makes me extremely anxious.

I was wondering if any other of you guys have had the same issue. I'm wondering if its maybe the darkness of the place I'm in (northern Europe), but I do supplement with Vitamin D and hit the Gym daily, so I have no idea really.

Post: #2

(12-13-2016 12:29 PM)trainwreck Wrote:  I'm 28 and with now well over 100 bangs, mostly with very beautiful women who other guys would kill to be with. But that's exactly the issue. I've always had this big thing of reaching over 100 bangs, and of banging extremely hot women.

Post: #3

well I see what you're getting at there. The extremely hot part is obviously one or two cases over the past years, I understand that this might be taken a bit too word-to-word. Would appreciate any input from other people who've had the same problem of getting to a point where you just get tired of it tho

Post: #4

(12-13-2016 12:39 PM)trainwreck Wrote:  well I see what you're getting at there. The extremely hot part is obviously one or two cases over the past years, I understand that this might be taken a bit too word-to-word. Would appreciate any input from other people who've had the same problem of getting to a point where you just get tired of it tho

Get into a monogamous relationship? only one girlfriend with no extra bangs?

Post: #5

Players fatigue, take a break over the winter and relax

Post: #6

Pack up a tent, a sleeping bag, some food, some water, extra clothes, first aide kit, and retreat to the mountains for a week. Hike, introspect, enjoy nature, and meditate, then return to civilization.

Post: #7

(12-13-2016 01:28 PM)Samseau Wrote:  Players fatigue, take a break over the winter and relax

Nailed it.

I agree with Samseau, take a game hiatus.

   

Post: #8

(12-13-2016 12:44 PM)Befikre Wrote:  

(12-13-2016 12:39 PM)trainwreck Wrote:  well I see what you're getting at there. The extremely hot part is obviously one or two cases over the past years, I understand that this might be taken a bit too word-to-word. Would appreciate any input from other people who've had the same problem of getting to a point where you just get tired of it tho

Get into a monogamous relationship? only one girlfriend with no extra bangs?

We want to help the man not fuck him up worse.



I kid, I kid.

Post: #9

Just make the new target 1000 bangs. That's what i'd do if I could get laid!

Post: #10

You're probably getting approach anxiety because now you have high expectations to get the bang and not get rejected.

I'd suggest stop keeping track of notches, or even approaches, don't self-identify as a player or PUA. Basically stop putting pressure on yourself to live up to the player image that you feel you've realized and thus need to consistently live up to. Rather approach women you genuinely want to approach, enjoy the moment with them, or be a reclusive hermit if that's what you want at any given moment. Sex comes naturally enough, so you don't need to pressure yourself to make it happen. Anyone would get burned out on feeling like it's a loss or failure if the bang doesn't happen.

Approach, or don't, on your terms and there's no reason for anxiety.

Post: #11

Game works in stages.

Collecting notches is a beginner stage in game. It's a way to proving something to yourself and to others that you have what it takes.

You're progressing. That's good.

The world becomes a lot more amazing when you stop collecting notches and start collecting memories and offering invitations to women to join you on your adventure. Your anxiety will dissipate once change your angle and purpose because you're going to enjoy your life regardless if she joins you or not and it's no longer about the results of adding a notch but more about the process of living a good life with stories and memories worth talking about.

And understand that the dark side you saw when collecting notches, also had you written in the story. You were searching for something, as was she. You two are no different. Juts two broken people either trying to prove something or trying to find solace in each other to forget about other things going on in your life.

Post: #12

Is it possible that you have developed some kind of game ego? It's when you have proved yourself that you're good now and then you avoid talking to girls to maintain that 'state' and not ruin your self image you've earned.

That's just my first guess

Post: #13

There are two possibilities here as far as I see it.

1. You are simply experiencing player fatigue and mistaking the feeling for approach anxiety. If this is the case then take a break from game, figure out what you truly want, work on your own personal goals, and then get back out there when you are ready. I would say at that point focus on quality over quantity (as I have recently made that transition and find it much better).

2. You have re-developed approach anxiety, maybe from a significant amount of time of being out of practice. If you feel this is the case and you truly do not have player fatigue, I would say start from the beginning again and just start chatting people up. It can even be men or old ladies. Then work your way back up. Or, alternatively, just nut up and make an approach and maybe momentum will carry you on.

I have recently fallen into the first category after going on a huge spree driving the metaphorical hoe-runner, and am finding that I am truly happier with 2-3 quality women on rotation, as opposed to spending all of my time chasing new tail. Anyways, just my thoughts, though take it with a grain of salt. My perception of the situation may have more to do with my recent experiences than yours. Good luck!

Post: #14

Sex DOES NOT remove approach anxiety!

Approaching removes approach anxiety!

--

You can get laid without ever having to face your anxiety.

Two drunk people meet at a bar/club, they start to chat, they vibe, they drink, they dance, they go home and fuck -- But, no one really faced their anxiety.

You meet a girl through a friend, you have mutual acquaintances, you hang out, you have chemistry, you fuck -- But, you never had to face your anxiety!

You fuck a classmate, you met her at school, you never felt the pressure of a strange approach!

You fuck a coworker, you met her at work, you never faced the fear!

You meet a girl at a house party, drinks are flowing, music is playing, you vibe, you fuck -- But, you never faced real anxiety!

These are examples of how people can get laid WITHOUT having to conquer their anxiety!

*Alcohol is popular because it temporarily numbs anxiety.
*Social circles allow us to meet people without having to deal with anxiety
*Approaching acquaintances is different than approaching strangers
*Vacation sex is a different mental space compared to day to day game
--

You want to conquer your approach anxiety?

Identify the approach scenarios that make you the most afraid..???

Beautiful women shopping in the city square..

Sexy college girls at the mall..

Hot bitches on the subway..

Beautiful girls walking down the street..

If it is scary to you, DO IT!

If it causes you anxiety, DO IT!

That is how you conquer a nervous feeling! You go towards it and face it with courage.. You put yourself into the scary situation and this allows you to start taking control of the feeling.

(12-13-2016 12:29 PM)trainwreck Wrote:  over 100 bangs, mostly with very beautiful women

I got eyefucked today about 9 times

Sounds like you are doing just fine.

Like I said, you can have a good sex life, even without conquering anxiety.

(12-13-2016 12:29 PM)trainwreck Wrote:  It feels like I've accomplished the end of the videogame,

If you still have anxiety, there is more game to play!

--

(12-13-2016 04:30 PM)LINUX Wrote:  Collecting notches is a beginner stage in game.

I love this! I believe this!

Getting pussy is the beginner stage of game!

Being able to control yourself and the world around you... That is the advanced stuff!

Post: #15

Hey guys,

thanks a lot for these very productive answers. I believe that it's really just a combination of both. Fatigue and out of practice. I've been focussing on building a new business (which has been a good choice, certainly a more meaningful one than adding new notches) and therefore enjoying different life aspects. Me having a FWB during this time didn't help much either with motivating me to approach randoms, but now that for some reasons I had to drop her 2 weeks ago... this is when most of the anxiety started settling in.

I will follow some of the advices in here and ask take some time to myself why I have become so sensitive to rejection when I used to rejoice in it.

Post: #16

was on a similar thought stream but instead of being a dick and starting new threads I searched lol.

Approach Anxiety Even When Relatively Advanced (what the fuck?

Since I'm not really in the pickup business I can be honest about this and admit weakness.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?

Why do I still have approach anxiety? I've been in the game 10 + years. Approaches thousands of girls. Fucked hundreds of girls. It's definitely way easier to approach then when I first started but still when I want to approach my mind sometimes tells me 'she'll think you're creepy, she looks busy, she'll think you look too old, everyones watching and they'll hate you.'

Not going to lie when I first started off the game I had CRIPPLING approach anxiety. I couldn't ask the stranger for the time. I worked through this though. Could be genetic too my parents are highly anxious people.

Is there little hope just being able to do a non anxious approach at will? There are periods I have no approach anxiety. My mind is feeding pure positive self-talk and often when I have social momentum or riding a previous high.

99.99% of the time nothing too bad happens. Yes sometimes you get a rude rejection. Girl looks at you aggressively 'who the fuck you think you are' or just that you're not attractive but honestly nothing really to lose from my vast experience. It's always the best route of action to swing the bat (barring social circle/work things)

Post: #17

(12-13-2016 12:29 PM)trainwreck Wrote:  mostly with very beautiful women who other guys would kill to be with.

"ugh... fuck it. What's the point"

You're still subconsciously (through evolution), afraid of being killed... not necessarily directly through physical means. It could be your ego getting killed, your career getting killed, your wallet getting killed etc.

Those risks are always present so there will always be some sort of anxiety and remember... no risk = no reward. No anxiety = no accomplishment.

Either way, approach anxiety is good, you're still alive. Treat it as the burst of adrenalin that it really is and use your body's temp processing boost to go for more!

Post: #18

Approach anxiety is narcissism. Kill your narcissism and you kill AA. (I only have very very mild AA and it's on a similar level to doing anything activity/hobby related)