Post: #1

Not the first time it happened to me but it's annoying nevertheless . It really get's to me and I almost feel like going to ask for the money back .

I am not a stingy person far from it . But maybe the rejection + lighter bank account thingy + time wasted really gets to me . Off the top of my head 3 times it has happened in the recent past .. the most recent being Saturday night ! The girl was a Belgian medical researcher and I saw her liking some borderline feminist articles on Facebook . We spent over 6 hours on the date .. talked sexual from the first hour .. about our fantasies , threesomes etc . I thought it was a sure lay .. We met around 17h and at 21:30h when I really made my approach aggresive looking to close she tells me physcially I am not her type at all and she will have to force herself to have sex with me . So I asked her why did you waste the whole evening with me ? She said because I am interesting . Of course !

I don't mind buying the drinks if the vibe is right which was in this case . I bought the first 3 rounds ..then made a passive aggresive move of telling her I am going to the toilet please get the drinks . She did that one round . Then I again bought the next three . After she told me she wasn't interested in me sexually I called it quits and for that last round she asked that we split the money !! I agreed but that's really taking the piss ! I paid for drinks all night and when it came down to it she asks to split bills like she gets to keep her face !

Anyways in hindsight I felt a bit agigated and thought I should have got the cue when she was being so reluctant to buy drinks . But it's really hard to tell .. Sometimes girls pay for their own drinks because they have self respect and they know they won't fuck you so they feel guilty in wasting your money . So I take it as a good sign if the girl is comfortable letting me buy the drinks. Also sometimes they pay for the drinks because they really like you and they are having a good time so they don't mind spending the money .

How do you know which is which ?

Am I wrong for feeling this way ? I know I am not tight or stingy but maybe rejection on my subconscious is the major reason for me being upset . Also it makes me angry that the cunts can get away with it !

Anyways I am off to Valencia for the summer starting tomorrow . Hope to have a good time and look forward to dropping data soon / cheers

Post: #2

Post: #3

If you see it as a financial transaction, why not just pay for a hooker? The costs are similar and the compensation set in advance.

If you don't enjoy the girl's company, then why did you choose to waste your own time by having 7 drinks with her? Tarts have been offering a set return on investment since time began. Everything else is a lottery. If you didn't enjoy that particular game for its own sake, why did you stay in it so long?

The girl didn't waste your time, she took the entertainment you offered her, and the free drinks that came with it. You made a choice, and spent the money, knowing the outcome would be uncertain. In this sort of situation people do not waste your time, unless you let them. In which case, you have only yourself to blame.

Post: #4

Quote:We spent over 6 hours on the date .. talked sexual from the first hour

This is the red flag for me. Also this is way too long for a date. If you were talking sex in the first hour why didn't you wait for a pause and say hey, "I have some wine back at my place let's go."

Game over.

You young cats gotta learn to close the deal. Be smooth and swift.

Post: #5

Seven rounds – am I reading that correctly? Ridiculous amount of time to spend in the bar. You have only yourself to blame.

Post: #6

Also why did you spend that much time in one bar? Change venues after 1-2 rounds.

Post: #7

6 hours in the same venue is way too long. As the other guys said, move after 2-3 rounds. And go for the kill sooner - invite her to your place.

Post: #8

The problem was not the 6 hours that the date lasted, it was not the 6 or 7 rounds you payed, it was not having stayed in the same venue the whole date, and it was also not having suggested to move to your place after 1 or 2 deinks.

The problem was that you spent your date talking about sex. You thought it was a sure lay, you where completely wrong. A guy should not have sex topics during dates, it kills the mistery. Less talk and more action.
You should have cut the conversation in the moment she started talking about it. A simple "I do not like to talk about sex" was enough, if she inquiries why, just say "I only discuss sex with someone I had sex with, otherwise I do not see the point" (wich is Rocha standard procedure), and proceed to talk about any other stuff. A guy should not do also long and heavy makeouts, this also kills the mistery.

Let her drink, when you both feel comfortable with each other and happy go for the kiss, and then imediattely suggest your place for more action.

Post: #9

(07-04-2016 09:58 AM)NapoleonDynamighty Wrote:  I thought it was a sure lay .. We met around 17h and at 21:30h when I really made my approach aggresive looking to close she tells me physcially I am not her type at all and she will have to force herself to have sex with me . So I asked her why did you waste the whole evening with me ? She said because I am interesting . Of course !

Are you sure she wasn't just shittesting you? Maybe you failed by buying what she said.

(07-04-2016 09:58 AM)NapoleonDynamighty Wrote:  How do you know which is which ?

I don't buy drinks on a date, I see no reason or value in sitting down talking and drinking and then trying to pull in one big wining move from the bar to private place.

I prefer doing/seeing something together like a concert/event in the city and having a coffee/ice cream/beer in the meantime as break time. When I see things go well, she's receptive and eager for more then I come up with an idea to buy some booze and drink together in more private place, at lake, on the beach, in the mountains or at her/my place, etc.

In that situation the booze amps up that attraction/comfort I built and it boosts up our instincts / horniness / feelings that are already there waiting for a kick to release themselves.

Post: #10

(07-04-2016 10:23 AM)Gmac Wrote:  

Quote:We spent over 6 hours on the date .. talked sexual from the first hour

This is the red flag for me. Also this is way too long for a date. If you were talking sex in the first hour why didn't you wait for a pause and say hey, "I have some wine back at my place let's go."

Game over.

You young cats gotta learn to close the deal. Be smooth and swift.

Lot's of young guys seem to think there's such thing as a "sure thing" because they detected some levels of interest. The only pussy you're sure to get is the one you're balls deep in. Chicks don't think like us...they could be turned on one moment and if you fail to capitalize then and there, they lose interest. Usually because if you're too obtuse to make a move at the right time, they pick up on the fact that you're not one who gets a lot of pussy.

Post: #11

You should consider this experience as a very good lesson.

The money and time you spent on her will help you to save even more money and time if you draw a good conclusion and avoid such women in the future.

Post: #12

In my experience, anytime a chick you have not yet banged talks about sex openly with you usually is a sign that she isn't attracted to you. May seem counterintuitive, but if she's too comfortable talking about it openly, its because there is no tension on her side.

If there's a spark and she is attracted, she won't talk about it openly with you until after you banged her. The tingly feeling would be too much for her to broach the subject, and you shouldn't talk about it either lest you kill the tension and mystery before you make your move. I never talk about sex with chicks I haven't yet banged and never found it necessary.

Post: #13

(07-04-2016 09:58 AM)NapoleonDynamighty Wrote:  at 21:30h when I really made my approach aggresive looking to close she tells me physcially I am not her type at all and she will have to force herself to have sex with me . So I asked her why did you waste the whole evening with me ? She said because I am interesting . Of course !

How old was this girl?

Don't sweat it. I've had maybe four girls in the past year give me the "I'm not attracted to you but I wanted to meet up with you because you seemed curious/interesting" line, heard it from a girl in her hotel room, heard it from a girl in her apartment after both of them had invited me there direct.

In my best estimation three out of four of these girls were hoes, like legit DL working girls, who targeted me because I'm a guy in my 30s who seemed like I might make a good income. They were looking to see what they could extract out of me, and got turned off when they realized that in person I was the "a bitch can't get a dollar out of me" type of guy.

"Not my type at all"? Bitch you saw my pictures and I look just like them. "Not my type" is code for "Not an exploitable beta." "You seemed interesting" is code for "Show me the money!"

Move fast with these drink date girls to weed out the hoes, pro or not. Last minute resistance is one thing, but "first minute" resistance is entirely another. Some girls will meet you in person and be pleasant, but end the date early just because they don't like you for whatever reason, and of course that's their right and perfectly fine. But if a girl is feeling you enough to meet with you in person and then is starting to be demanding and cold right off the bat, and giving you lines like the one you say she gave you after spending a significant amount of time with you, where she could have easily left, then she is rent-seeking hoe.

(07-04-2016 12:07 PM)Rocha Wrote:  The problem was that you spent your date talking about sex. You thought it was a sure lay, you where completely wrong. A guy should not have sex topics during dates, it kills the mistery. Less talk and more action.

Girls who talk a big talk about sex online or on a first date, but aren't giving it up, are beta-bait and the LEAST SURE lay that there ever was. I remember one girl who told me on the date about threesomes and fetish parties and blah blah but then complained via text "It made me uncomfortable that you wanted to touch me so quickly." GTFO.

Their game is to reel in the simps with promises of wild kinky sex beyond the dreams of avarice...but there's always a catch. Also, this sort of behavior can be a solid BPD-tell. I fell for it a few times when I started - I won't get fooled again. Don't fall for this standard hoe-book trick, guys! It's "Manipulated Man" level stuff straight out of Esther Vilar.

Post: #14

(07-04-2016 10:13 AM)H1N1 Wrote:  If you see it as a financial transaction, why not just pay for a hooker? The costs are similar and the compensation set in advance.

If you don't enjoy the girl's company, then why did you choose to waste your own time by having 7 drinks with her? Tarts have been offering a set return on investment since time began. Everything else is a lottery. If you didn't enjoy that particular game for its own sake, why did you stay in it so long?

The girl didn't waste your time, she took the entertainment you offered her, and the free drinks that came with it. You made a choice, and spent the money, knowing the outcome would be uncertain. In this sort of situation people do not waste your time, unless you let them. In which case, you have only yourself to blame.

I think you bring up a great point. If were talking a one night stand 5 minutes of convo and then heading back to your place that's another story, I can see hooking up with someone you wouldn't actually have a desire to spend time with, talk with, hangout with, etc.

I'm only going to go on a "date" so to speak with a girl who's a cool chick, who I wouldn't necessarily mind hanging out with even if it didn't lead to a hookup, etc.

Post: #15

I don't go on dates. I have things that I do (dinner at my favourite restaurant, followed by drinks at my favourite microbrew location) that sometimes I invite girls to do with me. My schedule for the evening is already set. I'm going out for three hours and then I'm going home to watch a movie. At 11:30PM, I will be experiencing an orgasm. She's welcome to leave at any point in the evening, but my plan doesn't change.

Post: #16

You live and you learn mate. All of us have made similar mistakes in the past and learned from them. It's so damn expensive just to catch a buz at commercial establishments, that this alone is not worth it. However, I can see how you had a vested interest in closing the deal.

I can usually tell right away if I can bang a chick on the first date, if not, cut it short at the height of the moment and consider it a precursor to building enough comfort to smash later.

YOU are the prize!

Post: #17

6 hours and 7 rounds of drink on a date? even in 2008, when I was clueless I would not have done that... maximum 1 hour and 2 rounds of drink then you either invite her to come watch a movie in your place or you just end the date if she refuses to come.

Post: #18

Agree with everything said here. I always ALWAYS say when we sit down at a bar that "I'll get this first round and you get the next, cool?" If they hesitate i call them out playfully and pay for my own shit. It's never once let me down. I never go in assuming and I never think that my suggesting we go round for round will change her mind about swallowing my seeds later. Not enough guys in life take control of a situation.

Also 6 hours dog?


-CD

Post: #19

Next time after 3 hours if it isn't going your way cut it off suddenly but politely and say you have to go. Make her wonder if you got another date who wants action.

Go back to the basics. Sounds like you didn't do a venue change or other trial tests of her going along with your plans.

Post: #20

Many women will play guys for drinks. They get free drinks and makes them feel desirable.
Most women will not play you but will accept free drinks if you offer, or make a token effort to contribute (guy pays for dinner, girl oppers to pay the tip, and she's so stingy with the tip that you have to add more.)
A few women will pay for their own drinks, or buy alternate rounds. These are the ones I like.

Don't fall for put downs for "stingy." It's your money, you've earned it. If she's against stinginess, let her buy ll your drinks.

Personally, the one-night stand isn't my thing. I like to meet someone for half an hour and a cup of coffee, ice cream, etc. Or goto a free event (or a paid event when each buys his/her own ticket) and maybe I'll offer a coffee. Not more than that. Women work and earn money. I'm not a boring conversationalist. I have good body hygiene and dress well. No need for me to pay someone to talk to me.

Post: #21

(07-07-2016 05:05 PM)Tayo Wrote:  6 hours and 7 rounds of drink on a date? even in 2008, when I was clueless I would not have done that... maximum 1 hour and 2 rounds of drink then you either invite her to come watch a movie in your place or you just end the date if she refuses to come.

Omo, you dey for 9ja now? Wetin dey happen na your sides oooo

***********************************************************

Napoleon, I totally understand your plight, bro. It's happened to me too, I usually cut off after a bit..if she looks like she is just there to ponce off my liquor then I call it quits after a bit, mate. Unfortunately, there is no sure fast rule to pull it off.

Post: #22

(07-06-2016 12:09 PM)Suits Wrote:  I don't go on dates. I have things that I do (dinner at my favourite restaurant, followed by drinks at my favourite microbrew location) that sometimes I invite girls to do with me.

This is frame.

Post: #23

(07-10-2016 08:56 AM)coverdoc Wrote:  Agree with everything said here. I always ALWAYS say when we sit down at a bar that "I'll get this first round and you get the next, cool?" If they hesitate i call them out playfully and pay for my own shit. It's never once let me down. I never go in assuming and I never think that my suggesting we go round for round will change her mind about swallowing my seeds later. Not enough guys in life take control of a situation.

Also 6 hours dog?

-CD

Do you always always only date modern Western women? Good luck with this one on an Away Team girl, be it Russian or whatever.

Post: #24

(07-15-2016 06:19 PM)presidentcarter Wrote:  

(07-10-2016 08:56 AM)coverdoc Wrote:  Agree with everything said here. I always ALWAYS say when we sit down at a bar that "I'll get this first round and you get the next, cool?" If they hesitate i call them out playfully and pay for my own shit. It's never once let me down. I never go in assuming and I never think that my suggesting we go round for round will change her mind about swallowing my seeds later. Not enough guys in life take control of a situation.

Also 6 hours dog?

-CD

Do you always always only date modern Western women? Good luck with this one on an Away Team girl, be it Russian or whatever.

Actually when I was living in Germany, i went on a date with a russian chick and said the same thing. She complied. If I want to go half on drinks, i'm going half on drinks. Especially if it's some chick I don't know from a can of paint. After we established something, I don't have a problem paying, but before then, she better "cut it" - O.T. Genasis

-CD

Post: #25

1. No such thing as a "sure lay" until your dick is inside her.

2. Talking openly about sex early on is a huge red flag. In most cases it is beta/drink bait. The only exception to this that I experienced was when I connected online with someone regarding a particular sex game/fetish we would meet up to play.

3. Last week a girl bought me drinks all night, went to my room and fucked the shit out of me. Her investment from the start was obvious and palpable. Just bragging... hahaha