Post: #76

If you're a student I assume you're in your early to mid twenties, so look on the bright side - you have plenty of time to make some changes and your whole life to reap the rewards!

Some guys will be well into their thirties and forties before they start to figure this stuff out. Most guys never will.

Any aspect of your life that needs improving the advice is right here, you just need to put it into practice.

Ok so you don't have a job, money, or your own place, but your peers are probably in similar positions. Those things will come. What are other guys you know that are successful with chicks doing? What can you incorporate into your own game?

Being a low energy guy isn't an excuse. I'm a low energy guy too but I make the most of what I've got. That shit is all in the mind, you can change your perception of yourself just by leading a more interesting life.

Being a student is a great opportunity to make friends and build a social circle that you will have for life if cultivated. Same goes for playing the guitar, chicks dig guys who can play a musical instrument.

Join a band, a club, a meetup group or something. That's a great avenue for meeting women and cool like minded dudes your own age.

Make some female friends - and reap the rewards for years to come as you move in and out of their circles getting introduced to their friends.

Get out and about and enjoy this stage of your life, you've got no real responsibilities and that will be a memory before you know it.

Manoeuvre yourself into social situations where you are hanging out with people you like, doing shit you enjoy and whereby meeting women is a by product. If you are having fun and feel comfortable you will come across better when you open chicks. It took me until I was about 30 to realise that I didn't actually enjoy nightclubs, now I don't go but I wasted a lot of time doing shit like that because I thought it was what you did.

Try not to get too hung up on relentlessly approaching and spitting game, you are free to take a step back and reassess or chill for a bit. You can throw yourself back into it when you've regrouped and feel more positive.

You should definitely seek out forum members in your area who are willing to help, that's an opportunity that lots of people won't have.

You are working out which is great but be honest with yourself - in your 3 years here what other improvements have you made?

Why not set aside some time each day to start implementing new habits. Get up at the same time each morning and meditate and do affirmations - low effort, no cost stuff that can strengthen you mentally and change your outlook.

It's time for you to get serious. I hope I don't come across as an asshole, I just think you need a bit of help getting motivated.

Post: #77

Quote:You are working out which is great but be honest with yourself - in your 3 years here what other improvements have you made?

Got into a graduate program.

(By the way, my age is in my forum profile.)

I have done the band thing the past but probably don't have time for that now. It's a lot of work to get an act together, and when someone quits you're almost back to square one. Playing live shows was the one time I experienced a good deal of attention from girls, but I wasn't game aware at the time so I didn't take advantage of it.

Post: #78

(05-01-2016 03:50 PM)RexImperator Wrote:  

Quote:You are working out which is great but be honest with yourself - in your 3 years here what other improvements have you made?

Got into a graduate program.

(By the way, my age is in my forum profile.)

I have done the band thing the past but probably don't have time for that now. It's a lot of work to get an act together, and when someone quits you're almost back to square one. Playing live shows was the one time I experienced a good deal of attention from girls, but I wasn't game aware at the time so I didn't take advantage of it.

I'm trying to get back into a band right now. You're very right about when someone quits, it's literally going back to square one. When this happened to my band some of my remaining bandmates didn't want to accept that we had to get back to basics and rebuild our band and so we just floundered around until we just stopped playing altogether. Fucking sucked...all that work for nothing. I miss playing shows. Anyway, not trying to derail the thread.

Post: #79

Yeah I miss it, too.

Post: #80

(05-01-2016 10:17 AM)RexImperator Wrote:  My 1RM lifts are 260 bench/ 375 squat/ 490 deadlift.

(05-01-2016 10:17 AM)RexImperator Wrote:  Decent but not great around these parts by any means.

Based on this, I'd say you're too harsh on yourself and need to work on your self-esteem. Because:

- what were your 1RMs 5 years ago? I bet they weren't even nearly as good as they are now. If you've been consistent in the gym over the last few years, you've definitely improved your physical fitness tremendously. That's not "decent but not great", that's nothing short of awesome!

- I'll always stick to the philosophy that you should never compare yourself to others, but only to previous versions of yourself, but let's make an exception here: you're in better physical condition than the vast majority of men today. Keep that in mind. That's already awesome in itself.

You've also mentioned that you're broke. That is a significant problem which you have to tackle head-on. I remember when I was fresh from college and had problems finding a job - after several months my self-esteem went down the drain. At that point in life chicks (and my lack of success with them) were the last of my problems.

So if I were you, I'd try and do everything possible to fix my job and finances first.

Post: #81

Apologies - I was on my phone and your DOB wasn't viewable.

You just come across as a bit downbeat man, I've never met you but it comes across in your posts and if that's what's happening in your interactions with women they're going to feel it and you're not going to get very far - which seems to be the case. That's why I said take some time out, take steps to improve and come back at it when you've got a bit of momentum going. You can make a lot of positive changes in a short space of time.

You've been on here for quite a long time and to be in your situation suggests that you're either not applying the advice you receive, or you're just dabbling, therefore you're not making any real changes and you're not improving as a result.

The biggest change you can make is in the way you think but only you can do the work. Trying to improve your game without improving your mind is like bodybuilding without squats and presses. There's no foundation.

Remember we all have our ups and downs, start small and try to get that upward trajectory going. Better late than never!

Implement a morning routine, there's info on what to include if you search the forum. Also, meditate. If there are any forum members in your area willing to meet up and critique your game, bonus!

Post: #82

Quote:- what were your 1RMs 5 years ago? I bet they weren't even nearly as good as they are now. If you've been consistent in the gym over the last few years, you've definitely improved your physical fitness tremendously. That's not "decent but not great", that's nothing short of awesome!

Yeah that's true actually. July 2013: First workout in my log, benching 100lb x 5. So long ago I kind of forgot! Thanks for reminding me.