Post: #51

For long periods of time, it's not a good idea.

It's even worse if you have some knowledge that the relationship is 'on the rocks.' or they're having problems. In these situations women are looking for an out, and since most women don't like being single they will swing to the easiest next available dick. You're already vouched for by your buddy, so the safety is there and it would be much easier than meeting a girl cold.

I would never betray one of my boys like that, and I've had a few situations that stick out in my mind that solidify my belief that it's not a good idea.

What a lot of guys need to realize is that a lot of married are extremely bored. Many feel stuck and neglected. In the past year I've had several married women just pour their hearts out to me, I don't even do anything I just listen to them. I know they want an out, but for me I don't believe in banging married girls.

Because of this knowledge, I'd really advice against a long term stay by another man.

Post: #52

@Rocha Your point is taken. Personally my own perspective on human nature allows for me to recognize our flaws without becoming negative or approaching the world with a "trust no one" attitude. Believe it or not, I'm extremely optimistic about other people and tend to always give them the benefit of the doubt.

To me, recognizing the possibility for these situations isn't much different than recognizing my own desire to sleep with other women when I'm in a relationship. Once I'm past the just dating stage, I refuse to cheat, even when I'm out of town, but that doesn't mean I stop having the urge to have sex with other women, and these women are often the ones in my closest vicinity (I.e. Her friends and family).

I don't act on these urges, but they are very human and real, and yet another example of the temptations created by close vicinity.

On a similar vein I generally do my best not to mess around with taken women, whether I know their man or not. This doesn't mean, however, I'm never tempted by them, and these experiences color the lens i take to my own relationships.

So my contention is we do the right thing in spite of our urges, not because we're somehow so pure they don't exist.

In my eyes, becoming apathetic and negative about the world because raw truths make you uncomfortable is a weakness (not talking about you but rather the general feeling you're concerned about). And men should have the courage to recognise and account for the truths in nature without letting them jade us....

As I like to say, take the world on the world's terms instead of how you wish it was.

I actually wrote an article recently about the difference between this courageous handling of humanity and what I see as the defeated apathetic attitude discussed in a current thread, and I will be posting it on my blog. So perhaps the fact that I'd been thinking about that issue recently contributed to the way I handled this topic in the OP.

I do understand that many guys can't weigh these issues without feeling negative about their fellow man, though, so I do appreciate your concern. For good measure, I'll voice again something I mentioned earlier in the thread, which is that I think most people of both sexes can be trusted to do the right thing in most situations.

(12-26-2015 05:02 PM)Rocha Wrote:  For the record also, my use of the "alpha" term, came in reaction to your "but at the end of the day, it's not the sex starved beta's pecker that finds itself inside your ole lady." My conception of an alpha male can be wrong, but I relate it more with a man with options, rather than a predatory behaviour of laying the wife of a guy who gave him shelter.

Gotcha. I only said that in response to another poster saying you have more you worry about from a "sex starved beta" than an accomplished player who gets laid a lot. To reiterate that point, my assertion is that this dichotomy is false because the sex starved beta couldn't sleep with your woman if he tried, while a spontaneous attraction can easily be triggered when a woman is around a man who has a knack for seduction.

My response was meant to make a purely practical point. Like it or not, women all over the planet cheat on their men. I'd say it doesn't happen often, but when it does it is almost always a man with options doing the deed, so I think convincing yourself that men who have lots of sex are the "safe ones" is a major error in thought.

We tend to glorify those who are most like us, so it doesn't surprise me that on a forum of players, posters would project virtues on other players that they don't necessarily have. I was just pointing out the fallacious nature of that thinking - like most of us here, I've seen countless men with options doing very questionable shit.

Anyhow, all alpha/beta talk aside, I think we can both agree about what a man should be, and I respect and agree with your call for virtue, honor, and loyalty among men.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #53

Yes, it's a bad move. Hope that simplifies. We already know women love conditionally. Are you not providing one of your queen princess's conditions she needs present for her to love you fully? Is the guy in question staying at the house a suitor to those needs? Cuck-city..

Women cheat 3 ways. Physical, Financial, & Emotional. The "work boyfriend" who she flirts with but never touches is an emotional cheat. If she fucks him, or has a girls night out mystery disappearance for a few extra hours then comes home unwilling to give it up? There's the physical cheat. The impulse purchasing of that $750 designer handbag on a credit card paid from your mutual account, that wasn't OKed by you first, there's the financial cheat.

Did I mention conditional love?

It's actually a situation providing you're present the whole time, that presents an interesting action/reaction scenario to reassess where your wife's mind is at. Does she talk in private a lot about said guy staying in the house? Is she overly cordial and comfort concerned about the guy in the house? Does she say snarky disrespectful playful stabs about you to the guy when he's there, as if to float it subconsciously over your head? Things to watch out for in such a situation.

Post: #54

(12-26-2015 12:42 PM)Geomann180 Wrote:  Generally - I think it's a bad move.

You're playing with fire and the best way not to get burned is to no play with it in the first place. A short stay of three or fewer days? I can deal with that. Longer than that and you can fuggadaboudit.

I like to think my best friend would let me stay over and I him regardless of circumstances. But I'd never want to put myself in a position to be tempted. I nearly lost a best friend over less with a girl.

G

The sad aspect of what you wrote, is in civilized reality, people should have the will power and fortitude to control urges and co-habitate for extended periods while being rock solid trustworthy. In a long-lost time in the past, this was definitely the case.

I know I could definitely control myself around a friend's hot wife indefinitely. I can imagine if a good friend's hot wife was widowed after my friend died, I sure as fuck would NOT feel comfortable if she came onto me, and would repel her advances.

There is disrespect, even post mortum. This is the moral code of friendship.

A good friend of mine was in town once and the "hello hug" occurred with me standing bent over as his wife was sitting down. As I gave her a hug she breathed heavily in my ear and said "you're fucking hot." I just ended the quick hug, smiled like a friend, and never told him. That shit makes me sick.

Post: #55

I know how you feel man(with the "friendly"hug), that's happened to me on one occasion and the word awkward would be an understatement.

Post: #56

A friend of mine invited me up to stay at his uncle's cabin out in the woods. We get there, and it's not some shanty shack, but a beautiful, luxurious mountain cabin situated well-within the tree line. This guy, my buddy's uncle, turns out to be the coolest fucker I've ever met. He starts telling us stories of his time in a biker gang, his propensity towards women, and hilarious stories of his wilder years.

At one point he even told me why he keeps pictures of him and his female friends around the house..."It's how you keep your woman in line." This guy!

Back to the main point, I'm a bit on the lean side, 5'11", good looking, etc. etc., but in no way as badass as my friend's uncle. He's a living legend in my mind, and I almost felt paralyzed by how fun and awesome the vibe at that house was. Everyone was laughing a good 15% of the time. The fact that he could out drink me by a factor of 7 in his 50's furthers my point.

Here's the kicker. Now, I have a lot of respect for this man. I consider him an uncle. The entire time there was a twinge of attracting between his lady and me. Truth be told, she was attractive and you could tell she was probably the life of the party more than a few times. Entire time though, always had that feeling. It was confirmed after my buddy and I left for the flatlands that she "Had the Asian fever!" and thought I was "So Respectful!" Lol

In my mind, she's great. They're both great.

It just baffles me that a guy like me, good "baseline," if you will could really hold a candle to such a legendary person. I didn't talk much, didn't lead much, and certainly wouldn't consider spitting any kind of game in that situation. This guy's uncle is the quintessential alpha of the working class IMO, I'm just a city guy.

In short, yeah you gotta command a lot of respect to pull something like that off, I feel. It's a class move, definitely looks good, and if you know yourself and who you're dealing with, I'm sure you'll make a wise-enough decision as to what's good or not.

Also, if you live in the mountains, the only way you're gonna get your own strange is if you ride motorcycles, big pick ups, or ATVs.

Post: #57

(12-27-2015 02:29 AM)Ingocnito Wrote:  The sad aspect of what you wrote, is in civilized reality, people should have the will power and fortitude to control urges and co-habitate for extended periods while being rock solid trustworthy. In a long-lost time in the past, this was definitely the case.

I know I could definitely control myself around a friend's hot wife indefinitely. I can imagine if a good friend's hot wife was widowed after my friend died, I sure as fuck would NOT feel comfortable if she came onto me, and would repel her advances.

There is disrespect, even post mortum. This is the moral code of friendship.

A good friend of mine was in town once and the "hello hug" occurred with me standing bent over as his wife was sitting down. As I gave her a hug she breathed heavily in my ear and said "you're fucking hot." I just ended the quick hug, smiled like a friend, and never told him. That shit makes me sick.

I trust myself around my best friend's girl. But I don't trust her around me. I don't trust any girl enough that I'd put myself in position where her saying the wrong thing (claiming I came onto her when she in fact came on to me) could ruin my friendship.

So my blanket idea of not putting myself in a spot to get tempted is more for my own protection more than lack of confidence in my ability to do the right thing.

G

Post: #58

I remember that i was seeing this girl when I was 17 and I really enjoyed spending time with her. I had introduced her to my best friend at the time and after few weeks, he told me he got heads from her. When he got involved with her, i don't think I was still seeing her, but I still thought that it was truly fucked up of him to get in touch with a girl that I had some feelings. I thought that I would do to him the same thing.

Few months after he was seeing this girl and they came to my house to chill (this guy had lots of girlfriends, someone who was a truly legend in game back in our younger days). She was a solid 8, 8.5 in my book, the type of girl that I would love to bang. Anyway, she started hitting on me in the Kitchen, told me that I looked really cute and we started kissing right there while he was in the living room. She took my number and after few days she comes to my house and we fucked like crazy.

After 2 weeks, she got emotional with him and told him that I am not a loyal friend and that she had sex with me. He came to my house calling me names and started crying (one of these dudes that you don't expect to see him crying). I told him, ''remember what you did to that girl I was seeing? That was just a pay back''. Obviously he didn't care about what he had done and he was telling me that i was a fucked up friend.

Since that day our friendship was never the same again. We would still hang out but he had totally changed. As today we haven't spoken for 4 or 5 years.

It's not a question of insecurity. It's always a bad move to allow your friends to move in with you and your girlfriend or wife. I don't care how close they are to me but I wouldn't let any of my friends stay with me and my girlfriend. That's a sure way to end a friendship, specially if you consider your girlfriend hot by most of men standards.

Another thing, just recently I saw this true crime episode where this football player allowed his coach to stay at his home with his wife. Soon after, his coach started banging his wife, she fell in love with him and after few months the players girlfriend and coach moved out and got their own place. 2 years after the coach dumper her, the fool player took her back in again. Then the coach started chasing her again and because she didn't want to go back to him, the coach paid someone to kill the player. It all started with the player being nice to his coach by offering him his couch.

Avoid unnecessary trouble in your life. Tell your friends not to become homeless.

Post: #59

(12-28-2015 03:17 PM)pitt Wrote:  Avoid unnecessary trouble in your life. Tell your friends not to become homeless.

I wonder if that's related somehow to why they used to restrict the white to landowners (homeowners)?

G

Post: #60

(12-28-2015 03:17 PM)pitt Wrote:  It's always a bad move to allow your friends to move in with you and your girlfriend or wife.

/thread

Greater truth never spoken.

Post: #61

Simple answer is Yes.

Post: #62

It's interesting about this red pill stuff. It's always someone else's story, always something you just read about on the internet etc

I'm over at a friend's house playing board games for an evening with a group of guys. Somehow family stability comes up in conversation... Next thing you know one the guys, a friend of my friend says, "Yeah, how I got a step dad was my dad's best friend came to live with us after the best friend got divorced. And then he stole my mom from my dad."

Everyone's reaction was pretty priceless - O.O wide eyed and shit. I was the one who said, "You know, I read on the internet you're never supposed to let another guy stay at your house longer than 2 or 3 days." The reaction was everyone in 100% agreement.

Post: #63

^^^ If we're to define "red pill" in large part as the true nature of women.. well, many women anyways, you can't ask for better real life perspective than that!

Post: #64

"Withdraw thy foot from thy neighbour's house; lest he be weary of thee, and so hate thee." - Proverbs 25:17