Post: #1

I use day game cold approaches to get laid. Most guys use social circle game. I always thought this was a bit risky: you make a move on a girl in your circle, she does not like you, word gets back to the rest of the circle, you are now a pariah. Does this actually ever happen with social circle game? It does work for most people I know so I am wondering if there is a way to take out the risk. Currently I don't mess with social circle game but I am always looking for more opportunities, are there any books like Bang or Day Bang that cover this?

Post: #2

in my experience warm leads through work/social circle come onto you and give you signals they want you to make a move.

Post: #3

Are you embarrassed to fail and others will know about it? So what? Unless you try it with every fit woman in the circle then it's OK.

If anything they will think "this guy isn't afraid to try". You should approach it the same way as if you were in a bar with those people and a hot girl sat all by herself at the bar. You're gonna approach regardless of who's with you right?

Post: #4

This has always been an issue for me. Can any veteran forum members chime in on this?

Post: #5

(11-10-2015 02:20 AM)Dawn_Snow Wrote:  you make a move on a girl in your circle, she does not like you, word gets back to the rest of the circle, you are now a pariah. Does this actually ever happen with social circle game?

It does. Don't shit where you eat.

Friends of female friends are completely fair game though, if they're both pretty they probably hate each other anyway.

Post: #6

Here's my book -> /thread-31842-...#pid623089

Post: #7

In my experience, women within a social circle usually make it incredibly clear if they like you. You shouldn't ever have to put yourself in a situation where you have a chance of being rejected.

Post: #8

(11-10-2015 03:50 AM)Hairz Wrote:  If anything they will think "this guy isn't afraid to try".

Being rejected by various members of the group will lower your value eventually.

Women are obsessed with their social standing in their group, so what kind of girl wants to go out with a guy who has been rejected by all of her friends already?

She'll be thinking of her friends' reaction when she tells them that she got off with you: "Uuurggghh, you got with Creepy Chris??? Remember when he tried it on with me the other day but I kicked him to the curb??? I bet he kissed like a vacuum cleaner."

Post: #9

(11-10-2015 03:50 AM)Hairz Wrote:  Are you embarrassed to fail and others will know about it? So what? Unless you try it with every fit woman in the circle then it's OK.

If anything they will think "this guy isn't afraid to try". You should approach it the same way as if you were in a bar with those people and a hot girl sat all by herself at the bar. You're gonna approach regardless of who's with you right?

This is BAD advice and will severely ruin your own reputation within a group. No one will think this. High hanging fruit is 100% correct.

Contrary to a lot of the advice here, reputation is everything and being seen as someone who hits on and tries to bed every attractive female around in a group will work against you.

When it comes to pickup, the best places to practice are in incredibly large population centers. If you go to a small college (under ~8-9k) or live in a medium sized city your reputation will proceed yourself and ruin your chances at meeting new acquaintances and potentially new bangs.

When it comes to social circle, small college, and small town gaming, go indirect. Play it cool and do a slow burn. Women that are interested come to you.

The problem is, building a good social group is very slow and difficult. Game and by extension being a player runs against the fabric of what people are taught. I doubt it will ever be socially acceptable to do what we do.

If you want to rake up crazy notch counts, do it in a major metropolitan city and FFS do not introduce your conquests to solid friends and social circles unless it is serious.

I have had to eject from social groups because of a bad reputation. They were good people, but ultimately it was hindering what I wanted out of it. Sucks, but you really need to think strategically about this stuff.

Post: #10

Alright key fact of social circle game. You have to be popular and well liked enough in the group for women to automatically consider you. Social circles are almost incestous as they are built in such away that women limit their dating options to that pool(unless a guy with good game comes along).

It's an automatic fence so to speak, and you will most likely know if someone is single in said group or not. Also if you have spent enough time with said group and have built up value you just need to collect IOIs and go for the best option. If you've been doing it right there will always be a girl into you.

Use the link in my signature for more information.

Post: #11

(11-10-2015 02:20 AM)Dawn_Snow Wrote:  I always thought this was a bit risky: you make a move on a girl in your circle, she does not like you, word gets back to the rest of the circle, you are now a pariah. Does this actually ever happen with social circle game? It does work for most people I know so I am wondering if there is a way to take out the risk. Currently I don't mess with social circle game but I am always looking for more opportunities, are there any books like Bang or Day Bang that cover this?

Key thing: You should make a move so subtly that in case of a failure the girl can shoot you down equally subtly.

What is subtle?

- Giving the girl you like more attention in group conversations, engaging her more.
- Flirting here and there
- Talking one on one with that girl more than with the others, having deeper conversations in private
- Sharing same hobbies, being in the same team at work/school, going to the same places, aka, using any kind of excuse to be closer together

That's subtle. If the girl doesn't feel you she can easily dismiss you in a nice way and nobody gets hurt.

It's only a problem when you do something big out of the blue to reveal your romantic interest or you start visibly hitting on a girl with friends around watching you. That's bad cause you draw too much attention to the fact that you're interested and put both of you on the spot.

Notice that usually when 2 people within the same circle are attracted to each other and start fooling around they keep it secret. I mean others can sense that something might be going on but it's still vague enough that both of them can easily deny it. And then few weeks later they come holding hands cause they are ready to show it. That's how things go down.

No... my personal way to be cool and get away with much more stuff than other guys it to be that social and flirty guy with all girls. Literally. With 50 year old secretary or cleaning service lady too. This shows that this is just the way you are in general. So people can't point out that you're flirty with Jenny out of the blue and can't put you on the spot just because they heard you joking with Sarah saying "if you had longer hair I'd totally date you but now sorry, we have to wait, right now it's just too soon for us, let's be friends at first..". That's the kind of shit I was telling girls at my work and they loved it. Why? Because I was always tongue in cheek. Bit honest but not really so nobody knew whether I was interested in her or not. Textbook plausible deniability.

Post: #12

(11-10-2015 02:20 AM)Dawn_Snow Wrote:  I use day game cold approaches to get laid. Most guys use social circle game. I always thought this was a bit risky: you make a move on a girl in your circle, she does not like you, word gets back to the rest of the circle, you are now a pariah. Does this actually ever happen with social circle game? It does work for most people I know so I am wondering if there is a way to take out the risk. Currently I don't mess with social circle game but I am always looking for more opportunities, are there any books like Bang or Day Bang that cover this?

Ah, that is the blue pill way of thinking. You make a move on a woman, she rejects you, and it's SHAME! SHAME ON YOU FOR HAVING SEXUAL URGES!

Here is reality - if you're an alpha (a man of high value), your female friends EXPECT you to make moves on them. They'll never ever hold it against you, even if they reject you. "That's just Hank being Hank, he tries to fuck all the women. Tee hee." I make moves on many of my female friends because that's just what I do. When it results in rejection, I laugh it off and act like nothing happened.

If you're a whiney blue pill beta, well, that's when it becomes a problem. If you're a weak man, your female friends view you as a female. You're friend zoned by default. And of course, this is the common beta approach to initiating sex: "Hey, um Sue, I've developed strong feelings for you, and I, uh, kind of like you. Um, can I kiss you?" If you act like that, she might get weirded out by it, and things might get awkward. It's even worse if you act butthurt after you get rejected.

Once your game is good, go forth and plunder all the poon, regardless of whether you're "friends" or not. Women expect men of high value to make moves on them. They only get pissed when beta men of low value express their deep feelings and emotions in hopes of getting sex.

Post: #13

High Hanging Fruit and The Beast are right.

Hank is also right - depends on style, but know that they're very different.

The problem with the first approach that The Beat explained, is that you'll be seen as an absolute dick if you pump and dump, because doing all of those things (giving her more attention, sharing hobbies, etc) will get her to 'like' you. You can't do that shit, pump and dump a girl, and expect her and the rest of the group to have no issue with it.

Hank's approach is fine for a pump and dump, because it's the adventure 'oops that just happened', oh well, Hank will be Hank type approach.

Post: #14

(11-10-2015 07:49 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

(11-10-2015 03:50 AM)Hairz Wrote:  Are you embarrassed to fail and others will know about it? So what? Unless you try it with every fit woman in the circle then it's OK.

If anything they will think "this guy isn't afraid to try". You should approach it the same way as if you were in a bar with those people and a hot girl sat all by herself at the bar. You're gonna approach regardless of who's with you right?

This is BAD advice and will severely ruin your own reputation within a group. No one will think this. High hanging fruit is 100% correct.

Contrary to a lot of the advice here, reputation is everything and being seen as someone who hits on and tries to bed every attractive female around in a group will work against you.

When it comes to pickup, the best places to practice are in incredibly large population centers. If you go to a small college (under ~8-9k) or live in a medium sized city your reputation will proceed yourself and ruin your chances at meeting new acquaintances and potentially new bangs.

When it comes to social circle, small college, and small town gaming, go indirect. Play it cool and do a slow burn. Women that are interested come to you.

The problem is, building a good social group is very slow and difficult. Game and by extension being a player runs against the fabric of what people are taught. I doubt it will ever be socially acceptable to do what we do.

If you want to rake up crazy notch counts, do it in a major metropolitan city and FFS do not introduce your conquests to solid friends and social circles unless it is serious.

I have had to eject from social groups because of a bad reputation. They were good people, but ultimately it was hindering what I wanted out of it. Sucks, but you really need to think strategically about this stuff.

I completely disagree.

The key with social circle game as it pertains to women is to not be "one of the girls." I'm not the guy they ask to hang out, talk about boy problems with, and sip cosmos. That's what their beta orbiters are for. I'm a guy who mostly does my own thing, but they like hanging out with me. I have no desire to be accepted as "one of them", because that would make me a female. I'm my own social circle, but I interact with other social circles.

I'd also note that it doesn't benefit you to commit to one social circle. You can be somewhat involved with many social circles, which basically allows you to derive all the benefits without having to deal with all the drama. If you hang with the same 5-10 day in day out, it's extremely limiting. Instead, become cool with many social circles, but there's no need to commit to any. I keep a small, very close circle of close male friends, and we bounce around many social circles.

I have also found that having a reputation for fucking lots of hot girls actually increases your reputation. Fat feminists might call you a pig, but women are actually attracted to guys who have a reputation for fucking other hot women. Just like people are attracted to someone who has money and power.

By way of example - my avatar is "Hank Moody" (a nickname in real life, hence the handle). Have any of your female friends ever said "I'd never fuck Hank Moody in real life because he bangs too many chicks"? No, for the most part, women think he's hot and find his playboy antics endearing.

Men of high value are presumed to have lots of sex partners. So plunder away.

Post: #15

That's not social circle game, that's dating.

WIA

Post: #16

I'm taking a day off today after a heated trial, so it's writing time...

10 Rules of Social Circle Game

I run social circle game almost exclusively. Why? Online dating is so much work, and it's not really fun. You spend hours messaging only to hang out with a chick who may or may not be hot, who you may or may not bang. I've had good results with online dating, but I've generally found the cost outweighs the benefit. At least with social circle game you get to hang out with your friends.

Here are my general rules of engagement. Your milage may vary...

1. Run with many social circles. Do not commit to any one exclusively. Sometimes you can even link social circles. If you're out hanging with one group, bring the another group to meet up. Social circles can change and intermix.

2. Be your own social circle. Have a very small group of likeminded close male friends. Even one is enough. Preferably good looking and game oriented. You do not need to be a full blown, bona fide member of any social group to hang out with them or bang their chicks. If anything, women prefer a little mystery. That guy they hang with 5 nights a week? He's boring, old news (though sometimes older girls will eventually 'settle down' with a member of their social circle, usually post wall).

3. Never ever become "one of the girls." They want to wear PJs, make cosmos, and watch romcoms? Absolutely not. If they ask you to do that the frame is off, but don't be afraid to laugh and say "fuck that shit." The goal of entering a social circle is not to become all the girls' gay bestie. It's to get access to hot women, and enjoy yourself. Being an orbiter and seeking their acceptance / approval will get you friend zoned immediately.

4. Game always applies, even to women you're not banging. Short text messages, no long phone calls about feelings, scarcity, etc. (you guys know the drill). You don't exist to drive your lady friends to places, pick them up from the airport, or carry heavy things. You're not an emotional tampon. You're a cool popular guy they like spending time with and being seen with.

5. You're not their bestie, and you're not gay. You have sexual urges, and you're not ashamed of them. Your lady friends are going to expect you to make moves, flirt, and act like a man who women like. She'll get pissed when Joe Beta does it, but he's her gay best friend, and like, ew! If you make a move and get rejected, it's only awkward if you make it awkward by pouting. A bang lost today might be a bang had tomorrow.

6. I know, I know, you're an alpha chick magnet just oozing with game because you read the RVF and a few books. Trying too hard makes you look like a total douche, and people will hate you. If your game is new, social circle game is HARD and you can fuck it up. Keep it casual. Brush off rejection with a laugh. Use "negs" very sparingly. I never use them. I've always hated that guy on Real Social Dynamics who runs around and won't shut the fuck up. My style is to not say too much (I am introverted, proudly), ask questions, and inject some dry / observational humor. ("People say you're a player, Hank. Is that true?" "Yeah, its true. The Yankees called me last week to take Derek Jeter's spot but I've been sort of jammed up...") If you've been doing this for 3 months, stick to online dating and continue to develop. Social circle game can get fucked up quickly.

7. A "bad reputation" can actually lead to good things. Well, let me put this differently. If you have a reputation for banging a lot of hot chicks, or doing all kinds of audacious stuff, that oddly enough results in people respecting you. If you have a reputation for being emotional, needy, or acting a certain way solely to seek other's approval, everyone will hate you. The key here is to truly not give a fuck what anyone thinks or need validation in the form of approval from others. Even if it pisses some people off. Think Steve McQueen, Hank Moody (not me, the one from the TV show), Jack Donaghy, etc. Not those dorks from Big Bang Theory.

8. If you're genuinely just friends with a girl, don't be afraid to get some recon on her friends. ("Stacey is sort of cute. Tell her to come out with us tonight.") Don't be a pussy about it, though. ("Um, is Stacey single? Do you think she would like me?"). Simply tell your buddies that you think a chick is cute, and figure out a time where you'll all be in the same location together. Or better yet, create the situation ("steve's bar tonight. bring stacey and tell her that your hot friend hank is hanging out.")

9. Participate in a broad range of activities in order to develop broad access to social circles. Sign up for a volunteer thing, join a Crossfit gym, join a running club, hang out at a local bar, do yoga for all I care. You will not develop a social circle posting on the RVF. Do not just go to the club and try and cold approach chicks every night. My advice is to just do stuff you enjoy. Personally, I fucking hate going to the club.

10. Fat chicks, blue haired SJWs, etc. do not help your cause. If you're using social circle game to elevate, it does not behoove you to be seen around town with women who are unattractive. I mean, you can be friends with anyone you want, but hanging around hot chicks results in, well, more hot chicks. For the most part, hot girls tend to hang around with other hot girls.

Social circle game is fun if you do these things, and your red pill knowledge is strong. Women just come into your life organically. Knowing more women basically means you have a larger pool of women to bang - friends, friends of friends, etc. It expands your options, and puts you in a much better spot already being preselected.

Finally - read 48 Laws of Power. Be that guy, without being "that guy."

Post: #17

(11-10-2015 09:17 AM)HankMoody Wrote:  

(11-10-2015 07:49 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

(11-10-2015 03:50 AM)Hairz Wrote:  Are you embarrassed to fail and others will know about it? So what? Unless you try it with every fit woman in the circle then it's OK.

If anything they will think "this guy isn't afraid to try". You should approach it the same way as if you were in a bar with those people and a hot girl sat all by herself at the bar. You're gonna approach regardless of who's with you right?

This is BAD advice and will severely ruin your own reputation within a group. No one will think this. High hanging fruit is 100% correct.

Contrary to a lot of the advice here, reputation is everything and being seen as someone who hits on and tries to bed every attractive female around in a group will work against you.

When it comes to pickup, the best places to practice are in incredibly large population centers. If you go to a small college (under ~8-9k) or live in a medium sized city your reputation will proceed yourself and ruin your chances at meeting new acquaintances and potentially new bangs.

When it comes to social circle, small college, and small town gaming, go indirect. Play it cool and do a slow burn. Women that are interested come to you.

The problem is, building a good social group is very slow and difficult. Game and by extension being a player runs against the fabric of what people are taught. I doubt it will ever be socially acceptable to do what we do.

If you want to rake up crazy notch counts, do it in a major metropolitan city and FFS do not introduce your conquests to solid friends and social circles unless it is serious.

I have had to eject from social groups because of a bad reputation. They were good people, but ultimately it was hindering what I wanted out of it. Sucks, but you really need to think strategically about this stuff.

I completely disagree.

The key with social circle game as it pertains to women is to not be "one of the girls." I'm not the guy they ask to hang out, talk about boy problems with, and sip cosmos. That's what their beta orbiters are for. I'm a guy who mostly does my own thing, but they like hanging out with me. I have no desire to be accepted as "one of them", because that would make me a female. I'm my own social circle, but I interact with other social circles.

I'd also note that it doesn't benefit you to commit to one social circle. You can be somewhat involved with many social circles, which basically allows you to derive all the benefits without having to deal with all the drama. If you hang with the same 5-10 day in day out, it's extremely limiting. Instead, become cool with many social circles, but there's no need to commit to any. I keep a small, very close circle of close male friends, and we bounce around many social circles.

I have also found that having a reputation for fucking lots of hot girls actually increases your reputation. Fat feminists might call you a pig, but women are actually attracted to guys who have a reputation for fucking other hot women. Just like people are attracted to someone who has money and power.

By way of example - my avatar is "Hank Moody" (a nickname in real life, hence the handle). Have any of your female friends ever said "I'd never fuck Hank Moody in real life because he bangs too many chicks"? No, for the most part, women think he's hot and find his playboy antics endearing.

Men of high value are presumed to have lots of sex partners. So plunder away.

You've raised some good points Hank. I should have added a few extra details as to why I have my opinion:

The last time I was even remotely a player was college. The school I went to was small (around 7k). At first I knew no one but around my junior and senior year I had developed a rap that surprisingly cockblocked me a bunch of times. Think roughly 3 degrees of separation from other people.

Mind you, I wasn't knocking bottom barrel girls. All were pretty average 6s and 7s. All of this became a non issue when I moved to a new big city. However the opposite problem occurred as cracking new social circles became near impossible. The easiest places I have found to make new friends isn't the most conducive to being a player.

Places such as church and work or at least my workplace don't have people like us. However these two places aren't conducive to being a player at all. In fact it is the opposite, I hang around women that have under 3 notches, cook, and are feminine. I never really have much of a problem finding these women.

But like all life experiences it isn't so cut and dry especially from what you've said. However in the past 3 years I've only been able to find one group like that where the girls passed the guys around (yes I took advantage).

Funny 1st world problems we have...

Post: #18

(11-10-2015 11:35 AM)HankMoody Wrote:  I'm taking a day off today after a heated trial, so it's writing time...

10 Rules of Social Circle Game

I run social circle game almost exclusively. Why? Online dating is so much work, and it's not really fun. You spend hours messaging only to hang out with a chick who may or may not be hot, who you may or may not bang. I've had good results with online dating, but I've generally found the cost outweighs the benefit. At least with social circle game you get to hang out with your friends.

Here are my general rules of engagement. Your milage may vary...

1. Run with many social circles. Do not commit to any one exclusively. Sometimes you can even link social circles. If you're out hanging with one group, bring the another group to meet up. Social circles can change and intermix.

Bingo the maximum ROI is meeting lots of cool people who A. Get you in places and where you get high grade chicks. B. Larger amounts of cool people.

Quote:2. Be your own social circle. Have a very small group of likeminded close male friends. Even one is enough. Preferably good looking and game oriented. You do not need to be a full blown, bona fide member of any social group to hang out with them or bang their chicks. If anything, women prefer a little mystery. That guy they hang with 5 nights a week? He's boring, old news (though sometimes older girls will eventually 'settle down' with a member of their social circle, usually post wall).

Disagree that they won't fuck other guys in their social circle, but the end game you're right. Alphas of the group always get the pick. Thing is you shouldn't be number one in the group because then you are responsible for outings and making shit happen. I'm number one of one right now and it's killing a lot of my time though I have my pick of the litter. It's always good to hang around a group but doing it regularly as a charismatic guy is a time suck.

Quote:3. Never ever become "one of the girls." They want to wear PJs, make cosmos, and watch romcoms? Absolutely not. If they ask you to do that the frame is off, but don't be afraid to laugh and say "fuck that shit." The goal of entering a social circle is not to become all the girls' gay bestie. It's to get access to hot women, and enjoy yourself. Being an orbiter and seeking their acceptance / approval will get you friend zoned immediately.

No need to elaborate couldn't have said it better.

Quote:4. Game always applies, even to women you're not banging. Short text messages, no long phone calls about feelings, scarcity, etc. (you guys know the drill). You don't exist to drive your lady friends to places, pick them up from the airport, or carry heavy things. You're not an emotional tampon. You're a cool popular guy they like spending time with and being seen with.

Damn this is so overlooked it's not even funny. Minimize conversations with chicks of a social circle it will kill you. Even you run a show and you're top dog doesn't mean you should even do it that's how to lose status in a second. Let the mother hen handle it.

Quote:5. You're not their bestie, and you're not gay. You have sexual urges, and you're not ashamed of them. Your lady friends are going to expect you to make moves, flirt, and act like a man who women like. She'll get pissed when Joe Beta does it, but he's her gay best friend, and like, ew! If you make a move and get rejected, it's only awkward if you make it awkward by pouting. A bang lost today might be a bang had tomorrow.

I'm always talking to another girl not from my group on a night out. The girls in your group are more liable to chase you if you do it.

Quote:6. I know, I know, you're an alpha chick magnet just oozing with game because you read the RVF and a few books. Trying too hard makes you look like a total douche, and people will hate you. If your game is new, social circle game is HARD and you can fuck it up. Keep it casual. Brush off rejection with a laugh. Use "negs" very sparingly. I never use them. I've always hated that guy on Real Social Dynamics who runs around and won't shut the fuck up. My style is to not say too much (I am introverted, proudly), ask questions, and inject some dry / observational humor. ("People say you're a player, Hank. Is that true?" "Yeah, its true. The Yankees called me last week to take Derek Jeter's spot but I've been sort of jammed up...") If you've been doing this for 3 months, stick to online dating and continue to develop. Social circle game can get fucked up quickly.

It's all about presence man. Just staying quiet and letting other people talk is what any man should do. The men who talk the most are the ones are always the one trying to prove something in a group. A cool guy has nothing to prove. I hate RSD because of this.

Quote:7. A "bad reputation" can actually lead to good things. Well, let me put this differently. If you have a reputation for banging a lot of hot chicks, or doing all kinds of audacious stuff, that oddly enough results in people respecting you. If you have a reputation for being emotional, needy, or acting a certain way solely to seek other's approval, everyone will hate you. The key here is to truly not give a fuck what anyone thinks or need validation in the form of approval from others. Even if it pisses some people off. Think Steve McQueen, Hank Moody (not me, the one from the TV show), Jack Donaghy, etc. Not those dorks from Big Bang Theory.

Doing crazy shit is one of the main reasons to get a social circle. Those guys will be the one helping you do the leg work on adventures. Outings are not outings or parties they are adventures and that's the mindset to keep.

Quote:8. If you're genuinely just friends with a girl, don't be afraid to get some recon on her friends. ("Stacey is sort of cute. Tell her to come out with us tonight.") Don't be a pussy about it, though. ("Um, is Stacey single? Do you think she would like me?"). Simply tell your buddies that you think a chick is cute, and figure out a time where you'll all be in the same location together. Or better yet, create the situation ("steve's bar tonight. bring stacey and tell her that your hot friend hank is hanging out.")

Being blunt is part of being a man. Be to the point that's just good game.

Quote:9. Participate in a broad range of activities in order to develop broad access to social circles. Sign up for a volunteer thing, join a Crossfit gym, join a running club, hang out at a local bar, do yoga for all I care. You will not develop a social circle posting on the RVF. Do not just go to the club and try and cold approach chicks every night. My advice is to just do stuff you enjoy. Personally, I fucking hate going to the club.

^Glad I'm not alone in this.

Quote:10. Fat chicks, blue haired SJWs, etc. do not help your cause. If you're using social circle game to elevate, it does not behoove you to be seen around town with women who are unattractive. I mean, you can be friends with anyone you want, but hanging around hot chicks results in, well, more hot chicks. For the most part, hot girls tend to hang around with other hot girls.

Make it a point to not let undesirables have any sway in a group or better yet have them alienated. Doing social circle game right is having sway in a group, and the hot women of a group aren't exactly fans of these girls in an aesthetic way either. No hot chick likes being seen with ugly girls.

Quote:Social circle game is fun if you do these things, and your red pill knowledge is strong. Women just come into your life organically. Knowing more women basically means you have a larger pool of women to bang - friends, friends of friends, etc. It expands your options, and puts you in a much better spot already being preselected.

Finally - read 48 Laws of Power. Be that guy, without being "that guy."

10/10 good rules. You're clearly on the right path. I think what TheBeast was saying earlier was on how to not get the label of "creepy" which is difficult in a small town cold approaching. Thing is in those situations you need tight social circles as those places have many factions. It's best to be the middle man between these factions.

Post: #19

(11-10-2015 01:05 PM)The Beast1 Wrote:  You've raised some good points Hank. I should have added a few extra details as to why I have my opinion:

The last time I was even remotely a player was college. The school I went to was small (around 7k). At first I knew no one but around my junior and senior year I had developed a rap that surprisingly cockblocked me a bunch of times. Think roughly 3 degrees of separation from other people.

Mind you, I wasn't knocking bottom barrel girls. All were pretty average 6s and 7s. All of this became a non issue when I moved to a new big city. However the opposite problem occurred as cracking new social circles became near impossible. The easiest places I have found to make new friends isn't the most conducive to being a player.

Places such as church and work or at least my workplace don't have people like us. However these two places aren't conducive to being a player at all. In fact it is the opposite, I hang around women that have under 3 notches, cook, and are feminine. I never really have much of a problem finding these women.

But like all life experiences it isn't so cut and dry especially from what you've said. However in the past 3 years I've only been able to find one group like that where the girls passed the guys around (yes I took advantage).

Funny 1st world problems we have...

So what you're saying is that you had lots of success and that cock-blocked you a bunch of times? How many times did it cock-block you versus the number of girls you banged?

If you're doing it right, in most situations you'll be cock-blocked far less than you'll actually be helped.

Actually, in my research (because this topic has been covered a lot), I found this quote from you that actually kind of answers the question. You were cock-blocked far less than it helped you (girls sort of came to you):

Quote:Most if not all of my lays were social circle lays while i was in college. I never gamed, but let girls come my way naturally. I still got labeled a slut by girls and that scared a few away but mostly were jealous that i didn't take the bait.

Here's some more threads that have solid advice from DistantLight, TheBeast1, XXL, and others:

/thread-28901.html
/thread-32477.html
/thread-34576.html
/thread-36526.html
/thread-8028.html
/thread-4754.html
/thread-4754.html

In conclusion, someone saying that social circle game is a bad idea who have never been a part of many large social circles is like someone saying that going to bars to pick up women is shitty when the only bar they've been to is a dive bar with music way too loud, shitty service, and hardly any attractive women.

I'm of the opinion you should game anywhere you can find women that you're attracted to and who are the least bit open to being approached. Social circle/extended social circle, the park, the beach, community college, sports, the gym, at a store, at a restaurant, online, etc...

Post: #20

The problem was aneroidocean that the girls that were put off by it were hot low/no notches unicorn individuals. We're talking solid girls that would make even better girlfriends, wives, and mothers.

Regardless, this is something that needs to be played off by the gut very very carefully. When I wrote that comment I hadn't immersed myself in the groups I mentioned later in this post. My opinions and experiences have changed since then.

College as a social circle banging experiment is retardadly easy. Everyone is young, dumb, and full of cum. It's almost like college students expect some level of debauchery and run with it.

Once I hit the real world people became a lot more sensitive to sex amongst social groups and there were some horrid implications when it comes to game.

Take my word of caution: use your best judgment. A group of hot girls who hang out with some local bros? Blast away. Girls who hang out with a church group whose idea of a good night on the weekend is a movie and a boardgame? Full stop.

Not all social groups are the same.

Post: #21

You guys need to be aware of who is asking for advice cause telling a newbie to "get good game and plunder all the poon in your circles" is good recipe for a disaster to say the least. I can give examples of some jedi level shit I pulled but that's quite useless in this thread [which should be in newbie section anyway]. OP is asking what can he do now to develop his game in risky social circle game, not what to do once he gets good in general.

Here's my short guide for any newbie wanting to dive into social circle game NOW and not fuck it up:

Befriend guys. Shoot the shit with them a lot and bond over similar hobbies and interest. Do semi stupid shit together if necessary to create that bond. It's important to get along with other guys. Make them look important. Stroke their ego a bit. Be cool with them. Don't try to be wannabe tough guy. Don't outgame them. In fact you should be introducing girls to them to help them get girls. They will love you for it. It's easier when you...

Flirt with all girls and random women you come across. It shows your friends that it's just who you are, they will understand that this is a part of you and will be OK when you engage them same way. But keep the balance between social and sexual vibe in the way you interact with people, don't overdo one or another because at all times you need to..

Take care of your reputation. There is a difference between being a mawhore player who actively goes after girls "unapologetically" [it doesn't help] and normal attractive guy who somehow has girls fighting for his attention and chasing him. 1st one is try-hard, 2nd on is cool. So...

Keep it vague and never express typical romantic interest in one girl you don't want to date. Don't talk with nobody about how this one girl is special to you. It implies you're into classic dating one girl from your circles. If you want to be in relationship with her it's OK. But if you just want to hook up with her once or twice for fun then do not date her. You can't start dating one girl and then another one and another one, that's how you become try-hard which will ruin your rep. Which is why you'd better...

Play it cool and never ever hit on girls. This is sloooow game, give give give, build your social capital and take advantage of that later in the right place and time. To orchestrate that circumstances you...

Become the "go-to" guy. Take initiatives, invite people out, organize events, come up with ideas, set up afterparties, etc. That's how you can meet other people and introduce them to your clique, mesh them together, etc. This also shows everybody that you can meet other people [mainly girls] with ease so your overall value rises even more. You become "hot" this way [which basically means a capable independent guy with potential options]. So you hook up with your girl friend. Now you absolutely need to...

Stay cool after you sleep with a girl. Do not act like something is different now. Nothing changes. This is SUPER FUCKING CRUCIAL and nobody even mentioned this. Girls have to know that they can let loose with you with no consequences, no gossips, no rep issues afterwards. You need to show [don't tell] that you're discreet person and will stay cool no matter what happens cause to you it's no.. big.. deal.. at all. It's that "my secret garden/secret society" stuff at work. Once girls start view you like this you will notice the difference. You will be the safe guy to have fun with because you...

Take care of girls. You don't need to become their bestie or gay friend etc. Just look after your girls like a man. It won't make you lame or weak when you help your girls out with something, ask if everything is OK in their life or do something nice from time to time.


That's what comes to my mind when I think about it. Doing things this way you will become more popular guy who stand out. You don't have to be any superman cause most guys are completely oblivious to how they come across to others and have no interest to audit themselves to find out how they can improve this or that. But you are so you're already ahead of the rest.

Start slow and build it up gradually. Good luck

Post: #22

(11-11-2015 07:12 AM)XXL Wrote:  You guys need to be aware of who is asking for advice cause telling a newbie to "get good game and plunder all the poon in your circles" is good recipe for a disaster to say the least. I can give examples of some jedi level shit I pulled but that's quite useless in this thread [which should be in newbie section anyway]. OP is asking what can he do now to develop his game in risky social circle game, not what to do once he gets good in general.

Here's my short guide for any newbie wanting to dive into social circle game NOW and not fuck it up:

Befriend guys. Shoot the shit with them a lot and bond over similar hobbies and interest. Do semi stupid shit together if necessary to create that bond. It's important to get along with other guys. Make them look important. Stroke their ego a bit. Be cool with them. Don't try to be wannabe tough guy. Don't outgame them. In fact you should be introducing girls to them to help them get girls. They will love you for it. It's easier when you...

Flirt with all girls and random women you come across. It shows your friends that it's just who you are, they will understand that this is a part of you and will be OK when you engage them same way. But keep the balance between social and sexual vibe in the way you interact with people, don't overdo one or another because at all times you need to..

Take care of your reputation. There is a difference between being a mawhore player who actively goes after girls "unapologetically" [it doesn't help] and normal attractive guy who somehow has girls fighting for his attention and chasing him. 1st one is try-hard, 2nd on is cool. So...

Keep it vague and never express typical romantic interest in one girl you don't want to date. Don't talk with nobody about how this one girl is special to you. It implies you're into classic dating one girl from your circles. If you want to be in relationship with her it's OK. But if you just want to hook up with her once or twice for fun then do not date her. You can't start dating one girl and then another one and another one, that's how you become try-hard which will ruin your rep. Which is why you'd better...

Play it cool and never ever hit on girls. This is sloooow game, give give give, build your social capital and take advantage of that later in the right place and time. To orchestrate that circumstances you...

Become the "go-to" guy. Take initiatives, invite people out, organize events, come up with ideas, set up afterparties, etc. That's how you can meet other people and introduce them to your clique, mesh them together, etc. This also shows everybody that you can meet other people [mainly girls] with ease so your overall value rises even more. You become "hot" this way [which basically means a capable independent guy with potential options]. So you hook up with your girl friend. Now you absolutely need to...

Stay cool after you sleep with a girl. Do not act like something is different now. Nothing changes. This is SUPER FUCKING CRUCIAL and nobody even mentioned this. Girls have to know that they can let loose with you with no consequences, no gossips, no rep issues afterwards. You need to show [don't tell] that you're discreet person and will stay cool no matter what happens cause to you it's no.. big.. deal.. at all. It's that "my secret garden/secret society" stuff at work. Once girls start view you like this you will notice the difference. You will be the safe guy to have fun with because you...

Take care of girls. You don't need to become their bestie or gay friend etc. Just look after your girls like a man. It won't make you lame or weak when you help your girls out with something, ask if everything is OK in their life or do something nice from time to time.


That's what comes to my mind when I think about it. Doing things this way you will become more popular guy who stand out. You don't have to be any superman cause most guys are completely oblivious to how they come across to others and have no interest to audit themselves to find out how they can improve this or that. But you are so you're already ahead of the rest.

Start slow and build it up gradually. Good luck

While I actually agree with most of your post, there are some issues.

First, we both agree that social circle game is high risk. You can fuck it up, which can have broader ramifications in the community. IMO, start with online dating, because if you fuck it up, so what? You'll never see the girl again. Online girls are great practice.

As for doing favors for girls, I'll drive a girl to the airport from time to time or lift a heavy thing or two. But that's not my existence, nor is it what our friendship is based on. My point is that you don't exist to please her, accommodate her, or validate her. Too many guys do that. If I'm not in the middle of anything important, sure, I'll drive you to the airport or secure an Uber. But if you have to err on the side of being too alpha, or too beta, always err on the side of being too alpha. Never be afraid to say "no" or "I'm busy." Don't ever drop what you're doing because someone needs something.

When it comes to your "reputation", it's a fine line. Are you some creep who salivates over every vagina that comes within touching distance? Are you a gay boyfriend who just wants to be friends? Neither. My view is the Hank Moody approach - don't hide the fact that you're a sex loving playboy, but don't try and make out with every chick in 20 minutes because Real Social Dynamics said you have to. Both behaviors are for losers.

Staying cool with your bangs is a critical point that I left out. Keep that shit discreet, don't brag about it, and don't make it awkward.

Go out, enjoy yourself, and don't take it too seriously. They call it "game" for a reason - it's a game. It's supposed to be fun. If bangs happen, they happen.

Post: #23

(11-11-2015 07:12 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  The problem was aneroidocean that the girls that were put off by it were hot low/no notches unicorn individuals. We're talking solid girls that would make even better girlfriends, wives, and mothers.

What do extremely chaste unicorn women have to do with the question asked? He was speaking in general. A general answer is vastly better for this question. Pointing out these huge pitfalls that really only exist in the unicorn environment is not really accurate as an answer to the general question.

(11-11-2015 07:12 AM)The Beast1 Wrote:  Take my word of caution: use your best judgment. A group of hot girls who hang out with some local bros? Blast away. Girls who hang out with a church group whose idea of a good night on the weekend is a movie and a boardgame? Full stop.

Not all social groups are the same.

I understand the cautionary tale, but this wasn't posted in the newbie forum. Calibrating to the type of social group is a given. I suggest OP read all the other threads on this topic as he'd learn much more than with what has been offered in this thread.

Post: #24

I've had a lot going round in my mind about social groups this last month, specifically my main one. I think mine is really toxic and repressive and I need to break away from it. I can do better with girls on my own anyway.

The situation is really toxic and incestuous, it seems like none of them are really "friends" anymore so much as a bunch of people that use eachother and do nothing with eachother except drink all the time. Call me an idealist, but I have higher standard of myself and those around me than that. There are the token whores who have been passed around, and guys are trying it on with eachother's LTRs behind their backs, all this really messed up tangled shit. I've been rolling with this same crew in its current configuration for about 5 years, and it goes back several years further in an earlier form. There are a small number of solid individuals in this group, I'm merely speaking in general terms, the whole picture.

There was a post in the newbie forum some time ago by a guy about "coming out of beta mode". This really resonated with me. In a social group, when you're more quiet and less assertive, with enough time you bring on yourself a burden of expected behaviour. Everyone wants to see you grow, as long as you don't outshine them. Plus people love to talk. You never know who is saying what behind your back, especially when guys act as bitchy and underhanded as women do. It's as if you built your own cage and handed someone else the key.

It has gotten somewhat better with time, but I feel like there is always going to be an invisible ceiling that will attempt to restrict my development as a red pill aware man. I can't thrive in that kind of environment.

Essentially, I have very mixed feelings about social circle game. I can see clearly how it could work, but my situation doesn't. I do my best work alone and always have. Maybe I just need better friends.

Post: #25

I agree fully with XXL.

HankMoody also brings up some good points.

Personally, over time, I have faded into social circle game camp by using it to leverage it into more lays.

I use the girls in my social circle as social proof when I go out to bang unknown girls.

Thus:

a) girls in my group are keen and interested due to preselection and girls I don't know are also keen due to preselection

b) I don't burn actively burn bridges i.e. step on other guys toes (there's always some guy who has his eye on a girl in our social circle)

c) create a limbo of friendzone and sex-zone. You haven't rejected and you flirt intermittently with social circle girls but they know you are banging on the outside

Primarily I am here to meet people and make friends and share experiences. A lot of people cannot handle sexual tension within a social circle, especially post-bang.

Girls will always leverage this into exclusivity as well so your frame really needs to be tight.