Touche
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Am I wasting my time here?
N00b here.
Background: I'm a 33 y old doctor. Divorced this year. I have a regular job but also do an extra 30-40 hours per week in various hospitals within an hour of my house. That means I'm usually mega busy, mega tired but flush with cash.
So I've been working in one hospital's Emergency Department on and off for about 5 years. I used to keep myself low key, didn't chat much, just get my work done and get outta there. That's one of 4 departments I book extra work in so if I stop going there it's no major loss.
About 6 months back I noticed a hot blonde girl working as a nursing assistant. She didn't wear much make up and didn't chat much... but I could see she was probably an 8.5 And so it began...
I'm a high status guy in that department. Everyone listens to me, the senior nurses (her bosses) come and ask for my advice etc. I started out making a little effort to chat to her. Joked around a bit. I found out she is a hardcore Christian and had been working on a Christian summer camp for 5 years in a row (red flag!). One evening I told her about one of my work trips abroad next year and she joked that she wanted to come too. I said she'd need to cook me dinner first and she seemed up for that. Towards the last 30 mins of my shift I could see her getting anxious, constantly looking at the clock and she asked me a couple of times if I was leaving soon. So I slipped her a note with my number on it.
Since then we've been msging but really I have no interest in being friends. I've always been going for multiple bangs. I set up a date, she felt ill so cancelled and rescheduled. The next week we had a walk through the countryside together. I bought her an icecream and touched her on the arms, shoulders and waist a lot. We went back to hers (lives alone) afterwards and I got some tongue action with any attempts at touching being quickly rejected despite attempted re-escalation probably 10 times. I had to call it a day because I had work so I left.
We continued to txt and I setup a second date. This time to a theme park which I'd been meaning to visit for a long while but never had the chance. I stepped up the touching and we both had a good time. Afterwards we went back to hers and again I got some kissing, she allowed me to mash her tits a bit but only over her shirt. She had strong resistance going on! I kept having breaks and re-escalating but didn't get anywhere.
I was more than a little annoyed at this point. But thought what do I'd give it a last shot? Went quite cold on her and said she'd need to cook me a meal for me to come round again. Gave her a date I was free, she bailed to see a male friend. Gave her another date... it was last chance saloon at this point. And she agreed. Made me a meal and watched a DVD. I can't remember anything about the movie as I was all over her. She still had strong resistance. I tried really really hard to escalate to the extent that I had a jokey semi-rape vibe going on! I managed to unclip her bra and that was it! Kicked out!
So I'm thinking it's a dead end by now.
She had a holiday planned. A week long beach holiday with a friend who she says is a complete slut (can sleep with 2 guys a night, every night etc). During the holiday she msgs me to say she was really sorry but felt we could only be friends as religion was too much of an issue for her. I replied "lol, k" and went radio silent.
About 2 weeks later I'm at work and she see her there. She starts joking that I'm not talking to her anymore. I joke back that I'd been "binned" so what did she expect? She starts txting again but I keep things quite cold. Then it seems she starts to chase me. She makes an effort to come and find me and flirt at work... to the extent that rumours start flying around the department about us. I still keep things relatively cold. Then she starts telling me she wants me to take her to the zoo! She sends me a pic of her getting ready for work with some boob exposed and a caption "I need cuddles". Eventually I give her a weekend I'm free but she says she has a friend visiting. I tell her to blow them off but she wouldn't. So I go cold again. She asks what's up and I basically say I have plenty of friends and that I have a new female interest who isn't anywhere as much hard work. She acts butt hurt but then sends me her calendar and asks me to pick a date for the zoo.
We go to the zoo, see some animals screwing with each other, and go for dinner. There's loads of playful flirting and we go back to hers again. I go in for a kiss and she initially rejects me but I just turn her head back and get some tongue action. We make out and I kiss her neck, ears, top of her chest and then suck on her nipples. That's as far as she would let me go. Any attempts to get into her knickers gets me swatted away. I keep trying but all I can manage is to get between her legs in the missionary position and dry hump her like that. Its like her clothes are superglued on. The day before she had joked that her pussy was out of action so I assume she was on her period.. and I have work that night anyway so I call it a day and leave.
The other night I told her that my other female friend wants to visit the local Christmas market. She asked to be taken there too!
The end of next week we're both working a Friday night but have the rest of the weekend off. My plan is to take her back to her house in the morning and have a "nap" before we set off for the day. She will almost certainly need some sleep after working a night shift.
Odds of a bang? Comments? Any advice? I'm a noob here but can take criticism.
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| 11-05-2015 01:38 PM |
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Latan
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RE: Am I wasting my time here?
I'm a total noob concerning "religious" girls, so keep that in mind.
To me, she constantly tries to set up the pace: no sex, take me there, buy me shit, reschule because I see a friend, ...
And you accepted some of it; so even if you showed distance and non thirstiness, I don't think you've a good chance of banging her.
If I were in your shoes, I'd refuse the Christmas market thing, saying that you want to spend time with your friend at this event, but that you'd be free later that night to see a DVD (or whatever excuse makes the most sense) at her home / yours.
If no bang or excuse not to see you near a bed, next her.
Must be hard to meet new women with such a tight schedule, good luck whatever your decide to do.
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| 11-05-2015 02:08 PM |
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Going strong
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RE: Am I wasting my time here?
" a hardcore Christian and had been working on a Christian summer camp for 5 years in a row"
compare with:
" She sends me a pic of her getting ready for work with some boob exposed and a caption "I need cuddles". " hardcore Christian, my arse
" We make out and I kiss her neck, ears, top of her chest and then suck on her nipples. That's as far as she would let me go. Any attempts to get into her knickers gets me swatted away."
There lies your mistake: any woman who, on a third date, lets you suck on her nipples, you have to put your hand in her "knickers", she wants it and her LMR at that point is just token. She "swats your hand away" while you suck on her nipples?  Are you a fly to be that easily "swatted away"? No way, man, be strong and get your hand in, under those circumstances. I mean, 3d date and sucking on her nipples, you are allowed to get tough at that point...
Now, if you really cannot force yourself into action, use alcohol (like Dalaran said). Reading your post, every time you got teased and refused, I thought: this guy should share a drink or two with this woman. Alcohol has been invented for that very reason, my friend: to break the awkward LMR between kissing+caressing and making love...
(This post was last modified: 11-05-2015 02:29 PM by Going strong.)
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| 11-05-2015 02:25 PM |
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LINUX
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RE: Am I wasting my time here?
(11-05-2015 02:54 PM)Touche Wrote: Lol, alcohol isn't an option when you have work as a doctor that evening and need to drive 30 mins to work too... But point noted, my logistics could have been better.
The thing with this girl is that the initial approach was very easy (i don't approach much because I'm always working and its not really appropriate at work) but its dragged on too long now. I might drop that id need a nap in her bed after this night shift. Is she agrees proceed, of not cancel...
She is multiple bang material, not wife material.
We are not serious bro. You're problem is your game, not the lack of alcohol. Be more aggressive. Stop taking chicks to the zoo, especially if your time is limited. She obviously likes you if you've been on 3 dates with her but you might be giving off the future husband vibe while the kid working down at GNC making 8 bucks an hour is tagging her at night.
Nurses are sluts, everyone knows that.
(This post was last modified: 11-05-2015 03:23 PM by LINUX.)
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| 11-05-2015 03:21 PM |
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heavy
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RE: Am I wasting my time here?
A lot of newb stuff in there.
The bad:
- Using words instead of actions...to chics, words are just pandering
- No congruency...you don't want friends you want to fuck, but you take her for a walk and for ice cream...just take her for drinks
- Never explain...when she asks complains you aren't talking to her, just smirk your badass doctor smirk and act ignorant. Don't explain, let her.
- Really excited about a date..."Then she starts telling me she wants me to take her to the zoo!" and the other exclamation point
- Free up a weekend for a girl you aren't fucking
- Bad bluff..."I have plenty of friends" but I will free up a weekend or whenever just to hang out with one chic. My advice...just don't say it. Never explain
- LMR and rejection...this is just experience. If she rejects you 9 times, don't go for a 10th without time and changing strategy. The Einstein quote.
The good:
- You're a doctor
- $$
- Going cold on her. This is an excellent tactic on a chic you'll see somewhat regularly.
- Pre-selected...your other chic friend
Just forget about her and move on. She might come around sometime and want to fuck, but as long as she is your goal, she probably won't.
Welcome to the paradox.
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
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| 11-05-2015 04:27 PM |
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heavy
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RE: Am I wasting my time here?
(11-05-2015 04:33 PM)Balkan Wrote: This. Tough love is the best love. Gringuito touched on this in the SA thread, when girls know about your status/bankroll it can magically turn hoes into housewives. Adjust your game accordingly.
Read this. It should have been your strategy from day 1.
/thread-8681.html
Yeah it's interesting. I make a decent living, but I'm not bankrolling by any stretch, and my car and apartment would suggest I'm even more humble than I am. But I have a great body and can come off as a bit of an asshole, so...
Oftentimes, chics want to fuck me for the sake of fucking. They want to be friends with benefits, or just fuck whenever they need it. Which, while I have been disappointed at chics not wanting more, I'm ok with at this point in my life.
Ying-yang sorta thing.
Friends, lovers, or nothing...there can only be one.
OP my take was a bit harsh, but you said you could take criticism. Dude you're sitting on top of the world, doctor, $$, single, divorced (learned your lesson)...enjoy the process a bit.
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
(This post was last modified: 11-05-2015 05:40 PM by heavy.)
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| 11-05-2015 05:34 PM |
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eradicator
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RE: Am I wasting my time here?
You are letting her set the frame too much, and wear the pants and make the decisions. And yeah, you could have certainly escalated harder, the period shit test is really just that, a shit test. And you failed. If she tries to use "I am on my period" as a shit test, go and grab a towel from the bathroom and lay it down. Tell her you got your red wings a long time ago, and that women are actually hornier on their period so the sex is hotter.
Granted, it isn't a 100% lock, but I think you could have pressed harder for sex, sure she is trying to get what she wants, to I guess lock down a doctor on her terms, but you want to bang, so do what you have to do to make that happen(escalate harder, be more aggressive sexually) etc.
She is clearly interested but you are letting her wear the pants too much. Step up your game and get more sexual. Get her back to your place, you are the hotshot doctor, you can tell her, "hey you want to see me, just come over x night after work". And then try to escalate like mad.
Team yoga pants
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pla...FO1O020uyw
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| 11-05-2015 06:03 PM |
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Rawmeo
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RE: Am I wasting my time here?
If you're really a doctor full of cash, and aged only 33, you should be swimming in a sea of pussies. Not running after a "Hardcore Christian" girl. If she had a previous partner, she isn't a hardcore Christian, but rather a headache that is making you work too hard for the bang. You can make her come to your place, but if she doesn't put out, or starts giving shit, kick her out and be firm.
Optimist: "The glass is half full." Pessimist: "The glass is half empty." Feminist: "The glass has been raped."
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Living in Thailand, enjoying life, making money, not interested in Western woman, not giving a fuck about millenial problems, addicted to rawdogging.
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| 11-06-2015 02:19 AM |
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