Post: #1

Just in the middle of reading "the Art of Seduction" by Robert Greene. In the first half, he writes about the different types of seductive personas, and the weaknesses of each. Damn near every persona has the same weakness: you'll encounter more danger from the same gender than you will from the opposite.

My question: why are there so many insecure people? Why do we as a society- more importantly, as men- tear down, attack and ostracize those who take risk, put the effort in and are rewarded with success? I was taught jealously was a feminine trait?

This could be just the ramblings of a mad man....

Many thanks,

thedarknight

Post: #2

Because a lot of men these days never had to test their masculinity. The upbringing consisted mostly of coddling in a suburban environment, school systems where you were both punished for being masculine and rewarded for mediocrity, sports where everyone gets a trophy, and single mothers who scorned any competitive behavior on their part.

They've never had to compete to win anything, let alone competed to survive at something.....and deep down they know they've never really been challenged or proven themselves, if only proving it to themselves.

Post: #3

I like this topic. A few years ago, I made the conscious effort to feel happy for other people and their success, as opposed to the jealous feelings I used to have. Most human beings do not like successful people, because they are few and far between. As such, they can commiserate with the majority of non-successful people in the world and feel better about themselves.

There is a reason the most popular episodes of the show "American Idol" are the first ones, where it's people coming on with a dream, and getting said dream crushed. People love watching failure. People love seeing people fail. Why? People hate failing. It gives them the sensation of an experience that is secretly vital to being a human: failure.

It's been hard for me to go out of my way to fail, but I've made the effort. The piece of ("""""red pill"""") writing that's resonated with me the most has been Rollo's "Buffers". This piece really gave me the basis of thought that made me understand what people really meant when they stated certain beliefs. Things like "I'm looking for a QUALITY WOMAN" or "I didn't even study for that test!" can be attributed to (modern?) human beings need to buffer against failure.

I would have loved if the OP gave a specific example, but it doesn't really matter because everyone (hopefully) on this forum has experienced. The desire to improve yourself physically or verbally manifests itself, and you notice yourself building a negative perception. The smarter ones of us change and become more milquetoast, because that is what must be done. You have to hide your success to appeal to the masses (on some scale).

Post: #4

(07-22-2015 08:47 AM)Easy_C Wrote:  Because a lot of men these days never had to test their masculinity. The upbringing consisted mostly of coddling in a suburban environment, school systems where you were both punished for being masculine and rewarded for mediocrity, sports where everyone gets a trophy, and single mothers who scorned any competitive behavior on their part.

They've never had to compete to win anything, let alone competed to survive at something.....and deep down they know they've never really been challenged or proven themselves, if only proving it to themselves.

The success of our friends can hold an uncomfortable mirror up to our own short comings - particularly if we ourselves are not actively treading a path to success.

I started my own company straight out of university, whilst most of my friends went into steady, 'prestigious', careers. What shocked and saddened me is how many 'friends' actually want you to fail. They may not say it openly, but they'll take every opportunity to snipe, and try to pick holes in ideas or belittle you for the sacrifices you make. These are not people who are naturally bitchy, or unpleasant in themselves. They simply mistrust what they don't understand, and view your independent success or preparedness to take a risk as a reflection on themselves. Usually, the more successful someone is, the happier they are to see your success. Those who are striving for success themselves in their chosen careers will also be sympathetic and true friends. Most people are content to coast through life, and do not like to see others attempting to break the mold.

Post: #5

I think its more about men not following the "rules", and therefore men that do follow them gets pissed and frightened. The feminist state we have today, is not being followed by some men, which actually makes those who do follow uncomfortable.

Its like playing a boardgame, and one guy in the groups isnt playing by all the rules. The rest will probably look at him in a ugly way, probably talking behind his back on how much of a cheater he is. But dont forget, that the guy "cheating" is also the guy who ends up with all the properties on the monopoly board. Who do you want to be?

Don't follow the rules of the state or the feminist organizations. Follow your own morals and standards.

Post: #6

(07-22-2015 08:58 AM)H1N1 Wrote:  

(07-22-2015 08:47 AM)Easy_C Wrote:  Because a lot of men these days never had to test their masculinity. The upbringing consisted mostly of coddling in a suburban environment, school systems where you were both punished for being masculine and rewarded for mediocrity, sports where everyone gets a trophy, and single mothers who scorned any competitive behavior on their part.

They've never had to compete to win anything, let alone competed to survive at something.....and deep down they know they've never really been challenged or proven themselves, if only proving it to themselves.

The success of our friends can hold an uncomfortable mirror up to our own short comings - particularly if we ourselves are not actively treading a path to success.


Define "Prestigious".

I started my own company straight out of university, whilst most of my friends went into steady, 'prestigious', careers. What shocked and saddened me is how many 'friends' actually want you to fail. They may not say it openly, but they'll take every opportunity to snipe, and try to pick holes in ideas or belittle you for the sacrifices you make. These are not people who are naturally bitchy, or unpleasant in themselves. They simply mistrust what they don't understand, and view your independent success or preparedness to take a risk as a reflection on themselves. Usually, the more successful someone is, the happier they are to see your success. Those who are striving for success themselves in their chosen careers will also be sympathetic and true friends. Most people are content to coast through life, and do not like to see others attempting to break the mold.

Post: #7

Jealousy isn't feminine or masculine. it's an evolutionary response to keep us safe. We all feel it. The true test of manhood is what you do when you feel jealousy.

Post: #8

(07-22-2015 09:18 AM)Easy_C Wrote:  

(07-22-2015 08:58 AM)H1N1 Wrote:  

(07-22-2015 08:47 AM)Easy_C Wrote:  Because a lot of men these days never had to test their masculinity. The upbringing consisted mostly of coddling in a suburban environment, school systems where you were both punished for being masculine and rewarded for mediocrity, sports where everyone gets a trophy, and single mothers who scorned any competitive behavior on their part.

They've never had to compete to win anything, let alone competed to survive at something.....and deep down they know they've never really been challenged or proven themselves, if only proving it to themselves.

The success of our friends can hold an uncomfortable mirror up to our own short comings - particularly if we ourselves are not actively treading a path to success.


Define "Prestigious".

I started my own company straight out of university, whilst most of my friends went into steady, 'prestigious', careers. What shocked and saddened me is how many 'friends' actually want you to fail. They may not say it openly, but they'll take every opportunity to snipe, and try to pick holes in ideas or belittle you for the sacrifices you make. These are not people who are naturally bitchy, or unpleasant in themselves. They simply mistrust what they don't understand, and view your independent success or preparedness to take a risk as a reflection on themselves. Usually, the more successful someone is, the happier they are to see your success. Those who are striving for success themselves in their chosen careers will also be sympathetic and true friends. Most people are content to coast through life, and do not like to see others attempting to break the mold.

Magic circle law firms, top tier investment banks, consultancies, etc.

Firms like Slaughter and May, Linklaters, Skadden Arps, Weil, McKinsey, Goldmans, JP Morgan etc.

Highly competitive careers with high rewards, but where most of them will still define their success by being AT a particular firm, rather than by something they themselves have created or done. Taking risks with other people's money will always mean defining your success in relation to others who have had to achieve independently so that you can trade on the name of the institution you're part of to do the job that a million different people could do just as well given the opportunity.

Post: #9

Fortunately jealousy is a rare emotion for me. Basically the only reason to feel sustained jealousy is when the person you're jealous of has actually, genuinely, done something unethical. But people are mostly mistaken when they reach this conclusion. In any event, in real cases of unethical behavior disgust would be a more appropriate emotion.

Otherwise, there is an extremely simple rule to live by if you wan't to eliminate jealousy:

Every time you start to feel jealous, replace your feelings of rage and anger with the very simple action of "taking notes". Because if you're jealous of someone he clearly has something you want. And if he has something you want he has something to teach you about how to get it.