Post: #1

Ready your barf bag, this tale will turn your stomach more than using the shitter immediately after Lindy West.

http://nymag.com/thecut/2015/07/what-ope...inism.html

Quote:As I write this, my children are asleep in their room, Loretta Lynn is on the stereo, and my wife is out on a date with a man named Paulo. It’s her second date this week;her fourth this month so far.

She must be ovulating.

Quote:If it goes like the others, she’ll come home in the middle of the night, crawl into bed beside me, and tell me all about how she and Paulo had sex. I won’t explode with anger or seethe with resentment. I’ll tell her it’s a hot story and I’m glad she had fun. It’s hot because she’s excited, and I’m glad because I’m a feminist.

Quote:Before my wife started sleeping with other men, I certainly considered myself a feminist, but I really only understood it in the abstract. When I quit working to stay at home with the kids, I began to understand it on a whole new level. I am an economically dependent househusband coping with the withering drudgery of child-rearing. Now that I understand the reality of that situation, I don’t blame women for demanding more for themselves than the life of the housewife.

[...]In this way, my masculine self-image was stretched but not broken. Diaper bag notwithstanding, I was still a Man. It wasn’t until my wife mentioned one evening that she’d kissed another man and liked it and wanted to do more than kiss next time that I realized how my status as a Man depended on a single fact: that my wife fucked only me.

This guy has no status as a man. He was born a bitch, and it's only been getting worse for him since then. First off, he self-identifies as a feminist. Combine that with him staying home as a house husband and her working, and this bitch's pussy has gone full Sahara. No wonder she's sought out the opportunity to cheat on him, with his approval no less.

Quote:When people ask how it started, I say this: We married young. She’d had sex before me, but only with a handful of people a handful of times. She never had a boyfriend, never had a lover. I was the first man she ever had the chance to get to know intimately.

If dicks were corn, here's her handful:



And that's just what she's admitting.

He married a slut. This girl didn't have a boyfriend or lover because she likely was riding the carousel at warp speed. A boyfriend would have slowed her down. Then, this simp showed up and put a ring on it.

Quote:By her mid-30s, having already had our children and entering her sexual prime, she felt keenly her lack of sexual experience.

Sexual prime my ass. She's worn out, but she's also offering the pussy free of charge, with no expectation of feelings or commitment. So she has plenty of offers, all of them more exciting than her husband.

Quote: Happily for me, she was willing to talk about it, willing to ask if I’d be open to exploring other options. We opened a bottle of wine and started talking, and talking, and talking.

She didn’t present it as an issue of feminism to me, but after much soul-searching about why the idea of my wife having sex with other men bothered me I came to a few conclusions: Monogamy meant I controlled her sexual expression, and, not to get all women’s-studies major about it, patriarchal oppression essentially boils down to a man’s fear that a woman with sexual agency is a woman he can’t control. We aren’t afraid of their intellect or their spirit or their ability to bear children. We are afraid that when it comes time for sex, they won’t choose us. This petty fear has led us as a culture to place judgments on the entire spectrum of female sexual expression: If a woman likes sex, she’s a whore and a slut; if she only likes sex with her husband or boyfriend, she’s boring and lame; if she doesn’t like sex at all, she’s frigid and unfeeling. Every option is a trap.

The rationalization hamster is not exclusively female. This man can rationalize as his wife's in his face infidelity as moving past judging women's sexuality.

But really, what option does he have but to rationalize? Accept that his wife doesn't love him and probably never did? Hence the lengthy essay proving that his open marriage works. For her.

Quote:Feminism always comes back to sex, even when we’re talking about everything else. The point isn’t that all women should be sexual adventurers. Celibacy is as valid an expression of sexuality as profligacy. The point is that it should be women who choose, not men — even the men they’re married to. For my wife, the choice between honoring our vows and fulfilling her desires was a false choice, another trap. She knew how deep our love was, and knew that her wanting a variety of sexual experiences as we traveled through life together would not diminish or disrupt that love. It took me about six months — many long, intense conversations, and an ocean of red wine — before I knew it, too.

When my wife told me she wanted to open our marriage and take other lovers, she wasn’t rejecting me, she was embracing herself. When I understood that, I finally became a feminist.

War is Peace. Freedom is Slavery. Love is fucking other people.

This guy had to drink himself into oblivion to deal with his wife's proposal. The better move would have been to divorce her, take her money, and have her pay him alimony and child support. Make the system work for him.

But that's not what he did, because he loved her.

Quote:That was two years ago, and today we’ve never been happier, more in tune, closer, tighter, stronger. Whatever power I surrendered, I don’t miss. I wouldn’t recommend it for everyone, but I tell everyone it works for us.

How does it work? We take turns going out. Because we have small children (ages 6 and 3), one of us stays home. (We don’t like to use babysitters because it gives us a curfew; we’d rather go out unfettered than worry about turning into a pumpkin at midnight.) Going out alone to hooking up with others was an easy transition. It does work both ways and, yes, I too enjoy sexual carte blanche. I just don’t use mine as much as my wife uses hers. What’s important is equality of opportunity, not outcome.

Instead of staying home with her small children in her free time, the wife goes on a dozen dates a month to get fucked by random men. The cuckolded husband would consider himself lucky to 1/4 of that in a year. He's so boring and emasculated his own wife doesn't want to fuck him. So good luck getting the other women of NYC interested.

Quote:[...]

There are of course moments of jealousy, resentment, and insecurity. Recently, my wife went on a date and fell asleep at his apartment. I hadn’t heard from her since 10 p.m., she still wasn’t home at 6 a.m. My texts went unanswered and my calls went to voicemail. A tight knot of dread lodged in my stomach as I imagined all kinds of dire scenarios and realized that I not only didn’t know where she was, I had no idea whom she was with. I pictured myself going to the police saying, “I think she’s in Red Hook with a guy named Ryan. I don’t know his last name, but I think he’s a graphic designer?” I’m not sure there’s actually a word for the unique blend of acute terror and unforgivable shame I felt that morning imagining that I’d lost my wife to Ryan, the maybe graphic designer. When she finally texted me at 7:30 a.m., relief coursed through me like morphine. She wrote, “fuckfuckfuckfuck Im soooooo sorry. Fell asleep.” I replied, “Just glad you’re ok, but next time, no radio silence. Remember: you’re not alone.”

If that's how he really texts, the wife must really cherish any time she can get away from him. Small wonder she probably hasn't fucked him in 3 years.

Quote:What surprises most people is when I tell them it’s not the sex-with-other-men that bothers me. The sex is the easy part, the fun part. It’s what the sex connects to, stands for, reveals that can be difficult. I don’t want her to fall in love with anyone else, and every time she goes on a date, I confront the possibility that she might. It happened at the beginning: The first person she dated after we opened up fell hard in love with her, and my wife, overwhelmed by his ardor, tried to love him back. Watching it happen, I was confused, angry, and terrified that she wanted to leave me. She assured me she didn’t, and whatever feelings she had for him didn’t lessen what she felt for me. Believing her then was the ultimate trust exercise. We survived because eventually I did believe her, and also because I learned to trust myself.

He'd rather the random men she meets just fuck her and leave her before the fluids have gone dry. He'd rather her cuddle up next to him with the smell of another man's cock still on her breath. All so his wife won't catch feelings for the flings she's having. They get all the sex, while he gets the emotional burdens.

Quote:This has been the great challenge of my open marriage: to draw strength from vulnerability. Doing so requires supreme self-confidence. You must first really, truly love yourself; it is the foundation upon which all the other love is built. From everywhere comes the message that what I’m doing is for weaklings, losers, failures, pussies; that if I had money and status, I could keep my wife “in line”; that her self-discovery comes at the expense of my self-esteem. My open marriage has made heavy demands on my ability to silence the voice of doubt in my head, that gnawing feeling of worthlessness. But I find I can meet those demands, and that I am able to build my self-confidence out of nothing more than the basic dignity we all possess. I’m grateful to my wife for pushing us to take this leap, and whatever happens to us in the future I would do it all again. And when she comes home tonight and crawls into bed beside me with a hot story about her date with Paulo, she’ll do it all again, too.

Vulnerability is strength, for a woman.

He should listen to that voice of doubt. It's telling him good advice. Those feelings of worthlessness show that he's not completely insane. But he silences his last shreds of common sense by cooking up some notions about feminism and drinking the pain away. But that not enough to stop him from knowing that he's already lost her.

This is the top comment (by SmellyDoofus):

Quote:Dude, this has nothing to do with feminism. She's not that into you but likes having a live in baby sitter.

But, it's only half accurate. While the wife in question is using him as free child care while she's getting stuffed like a turkey across Brooklyn, it has everything to do with feminism. Feminism, as an ideology, means nothing more than allowing women to do whatever the hell they want without suffering any consequences for their actions. Feminism applauds any woman's decision, no matter how destructive or foolish. And, in this belief system, it is the role of men to accept and support whatever a woman chooses to do.

So if a sane man hears his wife's announcing that she's going to fuck whomever she wants, he'd kick her to the curb, where the garbage whore belongs. Instead, this guy, who's already emasculated, buys into it, because of feminism.

The choice is yours. You can be a feminist who supports his woman's decision to get fucked by half of Brooklyn, or you can be a patriarchal het-cis shitlord who keeps his hoes in check.

Post: #2

Everything new is old. Everything old is new.

This kind of thing was tried in the early '70s. Open marriages. Swinging. It was depicted in at least one movie, "The Ice Storm," but I'm sure there are books about it that are better than that Hollywood junk.

From what I've read in various magazines and heard from people who were adults then, it didn't work then either. Jealousy is a pretty basic human emotion and it reared its head at some point.

And as for the traditional gender roles and being liberated? When the women file for divorce you can bet all that shit goes out the window and they become helpless females again. Be forewarned if you plan on going this route. Feminism is only "nontraditional" so long as that suits women at that particular moment.

Post: #3

That was painful to read.

I'd love to know what they both look like.

Post: #4

Quote:This petty fear has led us as a culture to place judgments on the entire spectrum of female sexual expression: If a woman likes sex, she’s a whore and a slut; if she only likes sex with her husband or boyfriend, she’s boring and lame; if she doesn’t like sex at all, she’s frigid and unfeeling. Every option is a trap.

The fuck is this? The only gender I can see having this viewpoint are women!

Post: #5

This lady got the benefits of a carefree single mom while married! She is the definition of the cake phrase.

Post: #6

I was in a "open relationship" when I was younger. Never again. Enough said.

Post: #7

Male hamster on steroids in overdrive.

Post: #8

Is it just me or has there been a coordinated effort to push this open relationship bullshit in the last couple years?

Post: #9

Those poor children with an absent mother and a neutered father. This was a wretched read.

Post: #10

Seriously, the whole thing read as if he was re-programmed by some kind of alien. Before reading the article I expected the actions of the mother -- I did not expect that reaction from the 'father'. I use father in quotes because he's that by name only, and calling him a 'man' would be an insult to males everywhere.

Is this the future of males supporting 'feminism'? Male feminists like holding up signs saying, "I believe in female rights etc". Are future men going to be holding up a sign saying, "I believe all married women should fuck who they want outside of marriage"?

Obligatory

Post: #11

Why do these dipshits want to make it public. Can't anyone keep a secret? I get that if more people fucked up their lives he would feel better since misery loves company. At least he got one part right of feminism, the attention whoring part. Oh and giving up his testicles.

Post: #12

(07-17-2015 08:47 AM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  And as for the traditional gender roles and being liberated? When the women file for divorce you can bet all that shit goes out the window and they become helpless females again. Be forewarned if you plan on going this route. Feminism is only "nontraditional" so long as that suits women at that particular moment.

Sure, she'll put on an act. But if a divorce can't give this guy custody, child support, and at least temporary alimony, no male can get them in family court.

Post: #13

Is he getting any on the side too? I couldn't tell from reading the article.

Post: #14

you can't tell because he likely isn't.

Post: #15

(07-17-2015 09:18 AM)ColSpanker Wrote:  Is he getting any on the side too? I couldn't tell from reading the article.

Post: #16

He should divorce her , get alimony, get a loft in midtown, hit the gym, lease a sportscar, and fuck young hot chicks-then see how his wife(ex wife paying alimony) feels about that feminist equality. If I read that bullshit on The Onion it would be funny, I can no longer distinguish parody from reality...

Post: #17

I would bet money that this is fake, and was actually written by a feminist woman. The writing just sounds extremely non-masculine, even by the standards of an emasculated cuckold man. Look at most of the bolded excerpts that Bacchus quoted. That's just not how men write.

dog Wrote:Is it just me or has there been a coordinated effort to push this open relationship bullshit in the last couple years?

Yes. It's part of the spearhead pushing for polygamy/polyamory/"plural marriage". The goal is to destroy traditional marriage entirely.

Post: #18

She is shopping to find a new man. Trying on dicks like shoes. He is fucked. There is a way to come back from this but it isnt pretty.

Post: #19

The comments are all golden:

Quote:It taught him feminism was created to destroy male identity, while expanding female identity. What a poor sap

So it taught him to devalue and disrespect himself and internalize his wife's narcissism. Fantastic message. Represents feminism perfectly.

This husband is so supportive he'll probably be carrying her attorney's box of files up the steps to divorce court.

You think she loves you?
Love can't exist without respect, and she clearly doesn't respect you. She might love you like a pet goldfish, but she doesn't love you like a husband.

You are an absolutely pathetic excuse for a man.
You lost control of your wife, and you are no longer the head of your household, breadwinner, and protector. Instead you are a wimpy stay-at-home dad who has completely emasculated yourself and let your woman be used by men who probably have bigger balls than you could ever have.
Good luck with your life, you ridiculous unmanly failure.

Post: #20

This has got to be a parody, right?

Or maybe its just a subtle anti-feminist piece, illustrating what life for men will become in the future caused by unrestrained feminism.

Its hard to believe that a person would really be so stupid that they would legitimately hold these views.

Post: #21

Quote: It does work both ways and, yes, I too enjoy sexual carte blanche. I just don’t use mine as much as my wife uses hers. What’s important is equality of opportunity, not outcome.

Lol at this cuck. The reason she fucks a dozen guys a month and he's probably fucked a couple of 4's over the last two years is because he's an unattractive doormat that has no game. If he could fuck a dozen dime pieces a month he'd be doing just that.

She will eventually leave him because she has no respect for him. She might love him, but in the same way a woman loves her cat. She doesn't love him like a husband.

Post: #22

This dude is like a free, live-in baby sitter.

The worst part is, I bet the kids ain't really even his.

Go Feminism.

Post: #23

(07-17-2015 09:29 AM)scorpion Wrote:  I would bet money that this is fake, and was actually written by a feminist woman. The writing just sounds extremely non-masculine, even by the standards of an emasculated cuckold man. Look at most of the bolded excerpts that Bacchus quoted. That's just not how men write.

dog Wrote:Is it just me or has there been a coordinated effort to push this open relationship bullshit in the last couple years?

Yes. It's part of the spearhead pushing for polygamy/polyamory/"plural marriage". The goal is to destroy traditional marriage entirely.

You know, you might be onto something about this being fake. Excellent call. Alarm bells are now going off in my head about this.

I went and checked this writer's New York Magazine author's bio and it turns out this is "his" first and only story.

Also, the only references I can find on the Web regarding a "Michael Sonmore" relate to this story. There is no Facebook profile or anything like that. Most writers are huge attention-whores and are on FB.

Nor do I see any college info or race info when I reverse the last name to "sonmore michael" (you can usually tell people's backgrounds by seeing where they graduated or what races they've run).

This story doesn't say Michael Sonmore is a pseudonym. So with all this in mind, I'm saying Scorpion called this one and the magazine either got played by a fake writer or is playing the public with a fake story.

Post: #24

(07-17-2015 09:36 AM)CH-Toronto Wrote:  The comments are all golden:

Well, not all of them...

Quote:It's interesting the backlash to this article. the fear you can read in the reactions of other men. give it 10-20 years. it's the next wave.

possession is the last shoe to drop. people that can give up the idiotic binary arrangements of life are better positioned to be happier in a world where old tropes just don't seem worth the hassle.

you can't control someone else's desires. and no one is ever everything to someone. this couple at least has the courage to let go of the silly notion that those outward desires ....mean you're taking away from what you have.

Post: #25

Like Patrice O'neal used to say: The amount of time it takes for a woman to pussy you up, is usually the amount of time she'll stick around to enjoy you being a pussy. When she'll get sick of seeing him, she'll probably find a replacement. Ironically, his only hope is that she's addicted to Alpha cock so that way she stays and doesn't divorce him! How pathetic!!