Post: #1

Talking to one of my OKCupid contacts online seemed to go really well, so I decided to ask for her # to set something up. She agrees and I call her that night and we spend a little time chatting.

We seem to get along fine on the phone, but says she's going to be on vacation next week but wants to set a meet up ASAP afterwards. As we talk, I notice she eventually starts trying to direct the conversation more towards travel and the trip she's taking, and trips she'd like to do in the future. That she'd like to visit Indonesia someday and so on. She really didn't offer much information about her own life except for her job, and I felt like while she was laughing at my jokes and talking about trivia some and playing along, it was me who was doing much of the serious talking about my own life.

It kind of set off alarm bells and I remember saying something like "yea I used to be scared of flying, maybe not anymore but I haven't done it much lately" and you could tell she really pulled back. We talked a little while longer and she asked me to call her again the next day before she leaves.

I try to contact her again the next day and I'm blocked on everything - I was actually a bit surprised at how quickly the block went down. She seemed very much like the "sweet" type who would tell a guy "you know you sound cool but I don't think we'll work out" maybe. She's obviously done this many times before.

Maybe something to be aware of. She was definitely an 7-8, so somewhat disappointed here. Post game analysis: she's in her late 20s and works a shitty job and hasn't had a chance to get the exotic selfies everyone else has. Or maybe she just didn't like the sound of my voice. But I guarantee the trip she had coming up was with another dude.

However, in future it's likely a good idea to pass on the profile of any woman of her age group that has a lot of travel pictures or talks about travel a lot and doesn't seem financially secure.

Post: #2

You're overthinking this. There's too many possibilities of why that happened, and you're unable to verify any facts.

Post: #3

(06-12-2015 01:54 PM)Surreyman Wrote:  You're overthinking this. There's too many possibilities of why that happened, and you're unable to verify any facts.

Probably so. Thanks.

Post: #4

(06-12-2015 01:54 PM)Surreyman Wrote:  You're overthinking this. There's too many possibilities of why that happened, and you're unable to verify any facts.

Agree, you are thinking with a focused lens on yourself only. Remember, this chick is on OKC and has many dudes sending her messages daily. She could have picked up on another guy, or has a boyfriend and got caught on okc, or got back together with her boyfriend, or was just attention whoring because she got in a fight with her boyfriend. etc. etc. there are too many avenues for explanation that don't involve your actions. Your focus should be the next girl.

Post: #5

(06-12-2015 02:14 PM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

(06-12-2015 01:54 PM)Surreyman Wrote:  You're overthinking this. There's too many possibilities of why that happened, and you're unable to verify any facts.

Agree, you are thinking with a focused lens on yourself only. Remember, this chick is on OKC and has many dudes sending her messages daily. She could have picked up on another guy, or has a boyfriend and got caught on okc, or got back together with her boyfriend, or was just attention whoring because she got in a fight with her boyfriend. etc. etc. there are too many avenues for explanation that don't involve your actions. Your focus should be the next girl.

Understood. Probably just trying to rationalize because I'm feeling bummed out because she seemed much more "into" me than some other girls, at least for a while, and she was by far the hottest one I was in contact with atm. I guess I should feel some consolation in the fact that my online "game" seems to be good enough that I do seem to be able to get the interest and #'s of the really hot ones, even if they flake in the end. With perseverance closing with one of them should be possible.

Post: #6

(06-12-2015 02:55 PM)XPQ21 Wrote:  

(06-12-2015 02:14 PM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

(06-12-2015 01:54 PM)Surreyman Wrote:  You're overthinking this. There's too many possibilities of why that happened, and you're unable to verify any facts.

Agree, you are thinking with a focused lens on yourself only. Remember, this chick is on OKC and has many dudes sending her messages daily. She could have picked up on another guy, or has a boyfriend and got caught on okc, or got back together with her boyfriend, or was just attention whoring because she got in a fight with her boyfriend. etc. etc. there are too many avenues for explanation that don't involve your actions. Your focus should be the next girl.

Understood. Probably just trying to rationalize because I'm feeling bummed out because she seemed much more "into" me than some other girls, at least for a while, and she was by far the hottest one I was in contact with atm. I guess I should feel some consolation in the fact that my online "game" seems to be good enough that I do seem to be able to get the interest and #'s of the really hot ones, even if they flake in the end. With perseverance closing with one of them should be possible.

Can't put her on the pedestal man, it was just some girl from online.

Onto the next one, girls arent rational, who knows why she blocked you.

Post: #7

(06-12-2015 05:30 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

(06-12-2015 02:55 PM)XPQ21 Wrote:  

(06-12-2015 02:14 PM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

(06-12-2015 01:54 PM)Surreyman Wrote:  You're overthinking this. There's too many possibilities of why that happened, and you're unable to verify any facts.

Agree, you are thinking with a focused lens on yourself only. Remember, this chick is on OKC and has many dudes sending her messages daily. She could have picked up on another guy, or has a boyfriend and got caught on okc, or got back together with her boyfriend, or was just attention whoring because she got in a fight with her boyfriend. etc. etc. there are too many avenues for explanation that don't involve your actions. Your focus should be the next girl.

Understood. Probably just trying to rationalize because I'm feeling bummed out because she seemed much more "into" me than some other girls, at least for a while, and she was by far the hottest one I was in contact with atm. I guess I should feel some consolation in the fact that my online "game" seems to be good enough that I do seem to be able to get the interest and #'s of the really hot ones, even if they flake in the end. With perseverance closing with one of them should be possible.

Can't put her on the pedestal man, it was just some girl from online.

Onto the next one, girls arent rational, who knows why she blocked you.

I'm trying to break my bad habits. TRYING. To not become easily attached doesn't come naturally to me, but unfortunately I understand the alternative is bitter tears.

Post: #8

I appreciate what everyone here said about overthinking being bad, and I've moved on. But I did a little more overthinking, and frankly I think I'm correct in this case. We'll have to agree to disagree on that, but I'm going to avoid this "I want to travel with you" type in the future on principle.

Post: #9

(06-14-2015 11:36 AM)XPQ21 Wrote:  I appreciate what everyone here said about overthinking being bad, and I've moved on. But I did a little more overthinking, and frankly I think I'm correct in this case. We'll have to agree to disagree on that, but I'm going to avoid this "I want to travel with you" type in the future on principle.

My experience has been whenever a girl I just met, or went on 1-2 dates with and haven't banged starts talking with me about weekend get away trips, etc.. even more extensive traveling, it always just falls off.

One such scenario, I met this 7.5 in college and reconnected with randomly 3-4 years later acting same way as you describe. She suggested a snowboarding trip. I was hyped cause I've only done it once, so served dual purpose for me, hit the slopes and maybe some ass... naturally as soon as I showed reciprocal interest and suggested we meet for a drink, she flaked, I deleted.

Post: #10

Flakes. If Jesus was a woman he would have flaked before the last supper.

Post: #11

(06-14-2015 05:17 PM)rpg Wrote:  Flakes. If Jesus was a woman he would have flaked before the last supper.

If Jesus was a woman, she would have given Pontius Pilate a BJ, and saved her life. And the 12 apostles would've been her 12 beta orbiters!