Post: #1

Couldn't find this via Forum search.

Quote:(CNSNews.com) – Seventy percent of American males between the ages of 20 and 34 are not married, and many live in a state of “perpetual adolescence” with ominous consequences for the nation’s future, says Janice Shaw Crouse, author of “Marriage Matters.”

“Far too many young men have failed to make a normal progression into adult roles of responsibility and self-sufficiency, roles generally associated with marriage and fatherhood,” Crouse, the former executive director of the Beverly LaHaye Institute, wrote in a recent Washington Times oped.

The high percentage of bachelors means bleak prospects for millions of young women who dream about a wedding day that may never come. “It’s very, very depressing,” Crouse told CNSNews.com. “They’re not understanding how important it is for the culture, for society, for the strength of the nation to have strong families.”

She pointed out that there’s “no data” to back up the common assertion that a lack of jobs during and after the Great Recession is the primary reason so many young men have been reluctant to tie the knot. “The problem with marriage was long before that,” she pointed out.



Unmarried males

After decades of feminism, Crouse noted that young men are now the ones who set the parameters for intimate relationships, and those increasingly do not include a wedding ring.

“And I know the feminists just yell and scream if you say anything like this, but time was, girls set the cultural morays, the standards, the parameters for intimate activity. The girls were the ones that set those boundaries. And now it’s the guys who do,” Crouse told CNSNews.com.

“And it’s doubly terrible because the colleges now are predominantly female. So you have some – up to 60 percent of the student bodies are female. And almost all of them are more than 50 percent female. And so the ratio [of] male/female is out of sync.

“And that means the girls have to live by the guys’ demands. And that means less romance. They don’t date. The girls, I have talked to numerous young women, lament the fact that they don’t have the opportunity to dress up and go out for an event.”

Young women who adhere to a moral code and refuse to participate in the “hook up” culture are now considered social misfits, Crouse pointed out. And they face even more daunting odds of finding a husband than their promiscuous sisters.

“It’s really interesting, because Mark Regnerus and Jeremy Uecker wrote their book, “Premarital Sex in America,” what, three, four years ago. And even then, they were very concerned about the fact that young women today are not as likely to get married. And their prospects, if they are not sexually promiscuous, are really low because the guys, if they can sleep around, they’re not interested in going with the girls who don’t put out.

“The ones who are very serious get married early. And that leaves the majority of the girls, then, by the time they’re 25 and into their first jobs, the pickings are very, very slim for them. And Mark Regnerus was very, very clear that the quote ‘good girls’ are the ones who are at risk now in terms of not being able to get married.”

According to 2014 data from the U.S. Census Bureau, 7.9 million opposite sex couples in the U.S. live together but are not married. A 2014 study by Johns Hopkins University also found that 57 percent of children born to women aged 26 to 31 are out of wedlock.

Crouse says the decline in marriage and a corresponding rise in cohabitation is happening despite at least a decade of research demonstrating the societal benefits of two-parent families.

“Even researchers from the left are coming out very strongly for the family and for marriage, and saying the two-parent family is necessary for children to do their best," she told CNSNews.com. "It’s not just good for them, it’s the very best. It’s the gold standard. It’s essential for children to reach their potential. And that has to be communicated in the popular culture."

According to “projections based on census data, when today’s young adults reach their mid-40s to mid-50s, a record high share (25%) is likely to have never been married,” Pew Research noted in a 2014 study documenting the decline of marriage in the U.S.

But men are not entirely to blame for the steep decline in marriage, Crouse pointed out. “A lot of women fear marriage. While feminism is a spent force, the ultimate consequences of that philosophy is a whole generation of women who don’t want any man to tell them what to do, and don’t really understand the give and take that is necessary for a marriage relationship.”

However, the box office success of movies like American Sniper, which features a very masculine Navy SEAL, is an indication that women still respond to strong men, she said.

CNSNews.com asked Crouse if that means the cultural pendulum has finally swung back in the male direction after decades of feminism.

“That’s not certain yet,” she replied. “There’ still a lot of anti-male stuff out there.”

Feminism has largely achieved its goal of equality in the workplace, so the movement has “lost relevance” for young women who are now earning more college and professional degrees than men, she pointed out. However, feminism’s effects on the culture – including the historically low marriage rate - will linger for some time to come, she noted.

“Feminism was supposed to bring women happiness,” Crouse said. “But the research shows that women today are much more unhappy then they have been in the past. They’ve ended up with far more opportunities, but their personal happiness is way down.”

Post: #2

It´s actually very easy , it´s all about incentives. What are the incentives for a young man to get married nowadays? Endure the headaches from a bitchy wife? Getting divorce-raped in court? Having your offspring taken away from you? Loosing half your assets? Geez, I wonder why marriage rates are declining?

Thanks feminism!

Post: #3

Most are probably divorced.

Post: #4

Guys are finally starting to wake up. I couldn't be happier to be part of that 70%. This push towards a feminist utopia is backfiring.

Post: #5

Interesting article, but from some angles it seems to still be blaming the men.

It's real simple - most women in the US aren't marriage material at all as they are childish narcissists who have no skills but think that they can do no wrong, sleep around for years and then have kids well outside the prime age to give birth (which is 16-25) and thus make poor mothers & spouses. Since so many are fat or obese or medicated they are also unhealthy.

Divorce laws are horribly skewed against men so why work and risk your earnings or, worse, going to prison for missing an alimony payment or having a "domestic violence" incident. It's a raw deal.

Case closed.

Post: #6

(03-12-2015 07:39 AM)not-a-pua Wrote:  CNSNews.com asked Crouse if that means the cultural pendulum has finally swung back in the male direction after decades of feminism.

“That’s not certain yet,” she replied. “There’ still a lot of anti-male stuff out there.”

Hhahahahaha. If the success of one movie means that feminism is "over" in America - I don't believe it.

I see it will take 30 years from now for recovery. In the next 10 years it WILL get worse, but the question is if the next 20 will be used to 'rebuild' or just say "fuck it" and accept it.

Post: #7

Quasi-dupe:

/thread-9856-p...#pid975944

Post: #8

It's times like this when I wish I had the intelligence (or a "sharp shiv") to really break down my feelings on how silly articles like these are. All I can say is, it is truly amazing that the point rests somewhere in far away galaxies while their heads sit buried deep in the ground. Though it is ultimately an indictment on them that they are willing to do all this research, yet cannot go a little bit further and find that tiny red pill truth inside all these numbers.

Post: #9

I'm 30 and only a couple of my friends from HS are married. Many have kids and long term girlfriends, but don't seem to be in a hurry to get married.

I'd say most guys from HS don't have particularly well paying jobs, even the college educated ones. Most don't own homes and mostly seem to living paycheck to paycheck.

Now, most of us come from lower-middle class families whose parents struggled their whole lives also. So there isn't much family money or connections. The ones I see doing best career wise seem to be firefighters. They make decent cash, but throw in a wife, baby and mortgage and they are basically living paycheck to paycheck also I think.

From what I see, it seems more difficult for people now to get a job that pays enough to live that American dream that leads to marriage, having kids, buying homes, etc.

My grandpa is 76. He got out of the army, went to work for PG&E for 30 years, got married, raised a family, bought a home, and got a very good retirement. Maybe it's just the area I'm from, but I don't really see that happening much anymore.

Combine all of that with divorce and custody laws and I think men my age just don't want to get married. I also think they see how miserable their parents are and don't want to repeat the same mistakes.

Post: #10

The very same thing happens, no matter where in the world, when this liberal feminist crap is pushed.

It is both a good, though in reality expected thing, but also a bad thing. If the USA goes the way of Europe the world will be much more violent and unpredictable than it already is.

Post: #11

Article is mostly blaming men but i see a bit of the cracks forming in feminisms armor. As long as more and more men keep realizing that marriage is a shit deal then were on the right track to making things in our favor.

Post: #12

Where are all the good women

Post: #13

Imagine the next generation we will have kids who were never raised in a married household, do you think they are going to get married? Its going to start to snowball, just like the fat epidemic were now you have grown up fat kids raising fat kids.

Post: #14

Incomes are down. College grads have debt. Women want careers not families. There are a whole host of reasons why marriage is being postponed. But it isn't because of guys fearing divorce rape. The average young man still lives in a world where he thinks his sweetie is different and would never do that to him.
I also agree that many of them are divorced. At least the ones at the older end of the spectrum.

Post: #15

We all need to do our part; I talk down marriage every chance I get.

I view this as a positive development. If younger men were buying into the current system which is so heavily rigged against them, there would be no hope for change

Post: #16

The only thing that's going to come from this are more co-habitation=marriage laws and other bullshit designed to part men from their money.

Post: #17

It will continue to rise too. I don't see marriage ever becoming as commonplace as it was decades ago.

Post: #18

(03-12-2015 08:34 AM)RioNomad Wrote:  I'm 30 and only a couple of my friends from HS are married. Many have kids and long term girlfriends, but don't seem to be in a hurry to get married.

I'd say most guys from HS don't have particularly well paying jobs, even the college educated ones. Most don't own homes and mostly seem to living paycheck to paycheck.

Now, most of us come from lower-middle class families whose parents struggled their whole lives also. So there isn't much family money or connections. The ones I see doing best career wise seem to be firefighters. They make decent cash, but throw in a wife, baby and mortgage and they are basically living paycheck to paycheck also I think.

From what I see, it seems more difficult for people now to get a job that pays enough to live that American dream that leads to marriage, having kids, buying homes, etc.

My grandpa is 76. He got out of the army, went to work for PG&E for 30 years, got married, raised a family, bought a home, and got a very good retirement. Maybe it's just the area I'm from, but I don't really see that happening much anymore.

Combine all of that with divorce and custody laws and I think men my age just don't want to get married. I also think they see how miserable their parents are and don't want to repeat the same mistakes.

I'm the same age basically and of the people I know from HS who got married, most are divorced. Hell, a few are on their second or third marriage but most didn't seem to marry. Of course, a huge percentage of these people grew up in some sort of single mother household. Of the ones with kids, most aren't married or still with their kids parents.

Even before finding the manosphere and before anyone was talking about the recession, most people I knew understood that they would be lucky to be married by 30.

The two big reasons are money and expectations/priorities. It was pretty much drilled in my head since elementary school that if you didn't go to college then you would end up flipping burgers your whole life. So, while many in my parents generation married their HS sweethearts or their college gfs, we all understood that those relationships were somewhat transitory. Of the people who got together in a LTR in college or HS, they understood that it wasn't going to lead to marriage because they would be moving off for college, grad school, or their first 'real' job. So, compared to the boomer generation, and even the gen-xers, it wasn't expected that you would really even start seriously looking for a future wife/husband until your mid 20s at the earliest and more likely your late 20s. That's because you have to get the degree, and now that everyone has a degree you need a masters it seems, and then you have to get the job and make the money, and of course everyone wants to travel and live life and this is all before the expectation of being able to afford a house before the wedding ring.

When my mom graduated HS my grandmother told her that she could either by her a used car or pay for college. Today you would be lucky to get three or four semesters worth of book and non-tuition fees for the price of a cheap used car and that is with in-state tuition. The housing market is another beast all together.

Add on top of all that that statistically a little more than half of our generation grew up in a divorced or single mother household and that in and of itself makes marriage somewhat bleak. Dalrock had a post a long time ago about the number of boomer parents being discarded by their children. I have seen a lot of that with guys and girls in my age range. The general thinking was that if you weren't there for me as a child, then fuck you I won't be there for you as an adult. I think we will see a lot more of that in the future too.

Post: #19

I'll be 30 this July and will be attending my friends' wedding from college this May. He will be the first of my close friends to get married (he's 30 as well). I have a cousin who lives in Vegas who has seem to have done it right; he knocked up his girfriend at 33 with his career in tow and now has a kid with whom they split custody with. He couldn't be happier to be a father, takes care of the child (he is no deadbeat by any means), and is on good terms with the mother while never fearing divorce rape. This may be the future for a lot of men, the white picket fence married-couple with children and a dog might go the way of the dinosaur.

Post: #20

(03-12-2015 08:30 AM)TheWastelander Wrote:  Quasi-dupe:

/thread-9856-p...#pid975944

Interesting, I used the forum search and searched for "Bachelor Nation". It did found the thread, but honestly, I didn't have the time to go through 562 pages. How did you find it so fast?

Post: #21

Of course the article is blaming men, but we know how to read it correctly.
The article is full of gold.
Like this one:

Quote:“The ones who are very serious get married early. And that leaves the majority of the girls, then, by the time they’re 25 and into their first jobs, the pickings are very, very slim for them. And Mark Regnerus was very, very clear that the quote ‘good girls’ are the ones who are at risk now in terms of not being able to get married.”

Too old at 25. It's over for women at 25. Hahaha.

Post: #22

(03-12-2015 09:44 AM)not-a-pua Wrote:  

(03-12-2015 08:30 AM)TheWastelander Wrote:  Quasi-dupe:

/thread-9856-p...#pid975944

Interesting, I used the forum search and searched for "Bachelor Nation". It did found the thread, but honestly, I didn't have the time to go through 562 pages. How did you find it so fast?

I read it not long after it was originally posted.

Post: #23

(03-12-2015 08:34 AM)RioNomad Wrote:  I'm 30 and only a couple of my friends from HS are married. Many have kids and long term girlfriends, but don't seem to be in a hurry to get married.

I'd say most guys from HS don't have particularly well paying jobs, even the college educated ones. Most don't own homes and mostly seem to living paycheck to paycheck.

Now, most of us come from lower-middle class families whose parents struggled their whole lives also. So there isn't much family money or connections. The ones I see doing best career wise seem to be firefighters. They make decent cash, but throw in a wife, baby and mortgage and they are basically living paycheck to paycheck also I think.

From what I see, it seems more difficult for people now to get a job that pays enough to live that American dream that leads to marriage, having kids, buying homes, etc.

My grandpa is 76. He got out of the army, went to work for PG&E for 30 years, got married, raised a family, bought a home, and got a very good retirement. Maybe it's just the area I'm from, but I don't really see that happening much anymore.

Combine all of that with divorce and custody laws and I think men my age just don't want to get married. I also think they see how miserable their parents are and don't want to repeat the same mistakes.

I'm guessing you are originally from the US. I have observed the same thing in the UK.

Basically, a typical family, with one wage, used to be able to save for a mortgage, and buy a house. When the parents got older, they could sell their house, buy a smaller one, and live comfortably on the remaining money. That is not possible now. In the UK, most people who want to get on the property ladder will have to have to wages coming in. That is not good for developing a family and suits the feminist agenda.

So what we've observed is more of a socio-economic change, than a cultural change(ie: influenced by feminism), but it is a change that suits the feminist agenda(no social stigma for women who chose to not be mothers at home etc).

Post: #24

We are in the midst of the biggest hook-up culture the world has ever seen, in past generations there were actually men who got married to have access to steady sex

It is now 2015 and contrary to some of the threads being started on here, pussy has never been easier to get

The avg 20-something is thinking why buy the cow when I can get the chocolate milk for free

Post: #25

I love how it still blames the men. But the whining and hand-wringing honestly makes me grin. Society may be suffering from this but society is going to have to sweeten the pot if they want us to even think about marriage again. Fuck 'em.