Post: #26

She has a giant ego and believes she's above societal norms like friendly conversation. Talking is for plebs. She's an 8 online, so depending on your city, that's a unicorn. She treats dudes like shit because every thirsty mofo allows it.

There are two ways to counteract this, one by putting her in her place verbally, or giving a strong IDGAF vibe. The absolute last resort, for me, would be to take her to a salsa club. I have a particular spot on lock down where girls approach me to dance nearly every damn song. I go mostly for fun. She can either hang with me or watch me get approached all night long. As much people watching as she'd like.

More realistically... just next her.

Post: #27

"not-a-pua [2]
Could be Aspergers. Rare in girls.
Try to approach with logic. Be very clear what you want.
PM Quote"

I agree, she could be a rare female Aspie.

Either next her or send her a text " I've enjoyed the first two dates, for the 3rd date you will come to my apartment to have sex". Then if she replies set the date for the bang.

Post: #28

Update

Texted her and asked her to hang out, she replied with busy(bs) then i said later and teased her about not being able to look at me or talk the entire date last time

She replied with upset eyes to the side/unamused face emoji and I'm the worst person in the world why do you wanna hang out with me

I'm not sure what to reply...is she being sarcastic at me making fun of her or serious

Post: #29

Valhalla,

Did she freak out to let you hug her or have any type of physical contact?

Have you tried to invite her to a more private place where it's just you and her?

Your story does remind me of a girl I went out with.. She would freak out when I made eyes contact. She would freak out if I were to have any type of physical contact... I slowly gained her trust by running some methodologies... It was crazy. On our first date I was aggressive and she freak out inside the car.. Then I understood what I was dealing with and I would have to tell her "I'm going to grab your hands now OK?"; "trust me, I won't hurt you, how does that feel?; "let me kiss you now" and so on..

I would also engage her mind to run the same tasks.. Like, hold my hand, approach me for a kiss, look me in the eyes... I helped her improve a lot....


Back to the thread..
In my opinion, I would not waste my time with the girl you described.. It looks like she is gaming you...

Post: #30

You should take her out again and treat her like dirt only if you are up for some fun and won't let it affect you emotionally. If her behaviour affects your self esteem NEXT her. But if you want to mess around do 1 more date

This bs she is giving you is ridiculous. Act like she is the most annoying person on the planet, like she is some girl you are being forced to hNg out with. Go somewhere you want, do what you want to do and if she complains tell her to stfu. If she says why are you acting like this tell her because you are a charitable dude.

It'll end up with you having your way or never seeing her again. I get the feeling it will end with you having a crazy psycho in your hands who was good for 1 bang.

Remember to keep escalating lol. Don't know why that made me laugh.

Post: #31

I once made an experimental POF profile of a hot girl with an outlandishly vile personality. Predictably, it didn't stop the hoards of thirsty dudes from messaging her and even pedestalizing her in some cases (e.g. "it sounds like you're frustrated, I'm sorry you've had bad experiences in the past"). And here we have the OP chasing after a girl who makes me suspicious that she's also part of some sociological experiment in men's reaction to an awful personality, claiming he "likes this girl and feels there's something there."

Need we wonder any further why so many cute girls have such shitty personalities?

Post: #32

Valhalla

You may be dealing with an extreme introvert. Cuddle game works well with them. Don't game her just yet. She won't talk much or be physically receptive to much until being around you doesn't stress her out. Do some digging on the intent to find out more about her. An introvert would enjoy sitting on the couch reading a book while you watch the game. That's how they bond. Then she will slowly open up. Then or if the blue she will completely open up. Then you can do some gaming. I got an introvert to cuddle after watching a movie late at night at her place. At first she was scared and nervous but after a few mins she felt the safety of being wrapped up in my arms afterthat i was able to do what i wanted. She even took some initiative.

Post: #33

(02-27-2015 08:18 PM)Valhalla Wrote:  I'm not sure what to reply...is she being sarcastic at me making fun of her or serious

Change the subject. Simple. Just keep it fun and light.

She seems like a crazy bitch and personally I wouldnt waste my time with her. (Been there done that)

But...... it sounds like you could learn a lot about where you are in your game by hanging out with her one more time and employing more of a DGAF attitude.

Crazy bitches like her will throw out those emotional shit tests to try to pull you into their frame. It's fuckin hard to try and keep grounded with these types of chicks. My last LTR threw out a lot of emotional back and forths and yeh it was stupid to hang around but sometimes you know if you can keep on your game with these types of crazy bitches you can stay on point with the more normal ones.

As a result my last LTR said that one of the things she really liked about me was that I was grounded when she was going off the fuckin chart.

Post: #34

Get the fuck out of there, she sounds like a basket case

Post: #35

(02-22-2015 04:45 AM)Valhalla Wrote:  I met up with her and try to talk a little and she's just quiet. Which isn't a big deal for me because I'm very good with these types and can ramble on.

But this girl is different, I find her incredibly difficult to engage. Even simple questions results in a "no" and "I'm not telling you that" She avoids eye contact with me the entire time, and looks away or forward. Any question I ask results in a one word answer. Any sort of open ended question I ask results in, "whatever" "maybe" "everything" "I don't know". I take her to the bar thinking, maybe she will lose some of her anxiety. She baby sits one beer. She spends the entire time people watching, looking at the tv, and trying to tell me not to look at her, or avoiding eye contact with me, she occasionally looks at my eyes and when I catch her she says "stoooop." and "this is why I don't like at you"

We eventually get somewhere dark and quiet where we make out a little, she doesn't let me go any further and I let it go and don't act too aggressive about it because she seems timid and I don't wanna scare the cat.

At this point I think, I actually like this girl and feel there's something there

When I came across that line I scrolled back up to check your name and join date to see if you might be trolling. You probably just like her because she's cute. Other than that, from what you wrote, she basically just sat there like a blow-up doll. Actually, I would want to go out with her because psycho girls excite me and I would enjoy trying all kinds of moves to open her up (maybe just physically - nomsayin?)

Good luck and don't get yourself killed (after the lay - sleep with one eye open - or both )

Post: #36

(02-22-2015 12:05 PM)LINUX Wrote:  Rule 1 : never fuck a girl that is crazier than you are.

That would equal lifelong celibacy.

Post: #37

Post: #38

I've worked in the past with high functioning autistic young adults to help them get ready for entering the work force without professional supervision.

The description you give conforms strongly with High Function Autism (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/High-functioning_autism) more then Asperger's. For one, there are more women with HFA. In addition, HFA young adults are much more likely to be curious about the world and other people while still having significant socialization deficits. Young adults with Asperger's usually have their fixations cemented and are very difficult to convince to go out and participate in activities not related to their fixations.

It's also possible she has AS and has fixated on the night club business and entertainment business generally the way young men with AS fixate on trains and minecraft.

I would probably just straight up ask if she is autistic or not.

Post: #39

This is very likely the case that she is AS or HFA. I'm particularly interested in this thread because I myself struggled with social interactions as a child and a young man. I had to work very hard at consciously developing my social skills in my 20's. It took me till my 40's and by chance getting to know a few mental health professionals to learn that my problems are most likely mild undiagnosed HFA or AS. I certainly have a lot of the AS traits which I've worked hard on hiding or overcoming in order to be more social and better with women.

I think there is a type of man interested in game as a means to overcome these issues to some extent, they may focus on game to the extent of becoming an expert player. Tyler Durden springs to mind as a PUA who believes he may be a mild Asperger.

Post: #40

And the motivation to overcome these issues just may not be as necessary for a slim attractive woman. She will have men after her regardless of the Autistic traits. Whereas these traits, even to a mild extent can be quite debilitating to a male trying to pull women.

Post: #41

I disagree with everyone in this thread.

What you're dealing with is an extremely shy and introverted woman.

They can be a little crazy and stuck in their own world. They can be a hassle to figure out at first. And they're often not worth it if you're looking for a short fling. But they actually make really good girlfriends - if you're looking for something more old-fashioned, shy women are the way to go.

And an introvert can sometimes offer a good balance to an extrovert, helping you slow down a tad and appreciate things in the moment, your immediate surroundings, and more genuine connections with people.

They may not be as much fun. They may not be able to work the crowd with you at a party; all your friends and family won't get attached to them the way they will with an extroverted girl. And they may not keep up with your constant thirst to go out (though she might just to marvel at the zoo that is the club/bar scene).

But such woman are (usually) more faithful, less tainted, and more loyal. They'll have your back when shit hits the fan. They'll be less hung up on what their girlfriends are thinking and doing, if they have many at all.

Someone who is introverted to an extreme can get obnoxious sometimes. It's not all roses, but in some ways such a person has a lot of value, and the advantages will be exaggerated too.

Of course, most guys here aren't looking for a relationship, but you did say you genuinely liked her. On the other hand, you may only think you like her because you can't figure her out. Lots to think about.

Or not. You could just move on and find someone else if you're not looking to get seriously involved with someone right now. It just depends on what you want for your life.

If you've got solid leadership qualities, she'll likely come out of her shell a bit after you spend some time together. Never fully but a bit.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #42

^ Very salient points BB.

It’s also worth mentioning that introversion/extroversion should be viewed as a spectrum – each person sitting anywhere in between the far extremes. She may be an example of an extreme introvert, with no other detrimental underlying issues as what’s been alluded to.

An extreme extrovert will help break her out of her shell, but there’ll more than likely be a disingenuous connection (resulting in a lacklustre vibe), since they’re literally polar opposites, almost as if they are two different species.

A “reformed” introvert (or mild extrovert), that has the ability and the social awareness to focus their energy on the task at hand will do well in this situation, for they have a modicum of insight into the mind of such a chick.

The key here being persistence, and maintaining frame, since the lack of effective feedback from an introverted chick such as this can adversely affect even the most hardened of players, resulting in an abortive move to protect one’s ego.

Post: #43

First of all you don't take a girl out to entertain her. You're there to entertain yourself. She's just there for the free* ride. If she's having a good time that's your cue to escalate. Pour a couple shots down her throat. Get her all warm and fuzzy and work the kino. The more she lets you escalate the better time you let her have. As in drinks and attention. She's paying for her free* night out with poosy.

You can tell within the first drink or two if you have a cold fish on your hands. I wouldn't invest much more in her and bail.

Post: #44

You're missing the point about extreme introversion. This is in effect a social skill disability and does by definition put an extreme introvert somewhere on the very mild end of the Autism scale. That does not mean she cannot come out of her shell and develop better social skills with much time and effort applied.

It just may be too much hard work for a player looking for a pump n dump or an addition to his harem.

Post: #45

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the...and-autism

"In her master's thesis (read it here (link is external)) Grimes posits that introversion is not the opposite of extroversion, but that they are two different traits altogether. And she proposes something that has come up here from time to time: That introversion actually is on the autism scale."

Post: #46

(03-11-2015 10:48 AM)Guitarman Wrote:  You're missing the point about extreme introversion. This is in effect a social skill disability and does by definition put an extreme introvert somewhere on the very mild end of the Autism scale. That does not mean she cannot come out of her shell and develop better social skills with much time and effort applied.

It just may be too much hard work for a player looking for a pump n dump or an addition to his harem.

^I assume you're talking to me since you drew a term from my post.

I don't think I'm missing the point at all. i specifically said that it's often not worth it for a short fling (aka pump and dump). This is just common sense; extroverted women are the easy ones to get in bed, and that's precisely my point.

But the OP did say he "genuinely liked" her (or thought he did); perhaps, I read that wrong, but to me that insinuates he might consider her for more than a fling if she wasn't acting so strange.

Regarding social disabilities, that doesn't bother me so much - for relationships. I've dated some extremely social women - in fact, I am dating one now - and I have fun with them. But I've also dated extreme introverts, and they have their strengths and advantages. They dig their heels in and get shit done. They're great at turning a house into a home and aren't so worried about what's going on beyond the walls.

Girls who are extroverted have more sexual partners, are more likely to cheat, are more likely to get divorced, and are more likely to be influenced by cultural norms or shit outside the relationship rather than follow your lead.

When I'm with an introverted woman, my own social presence seems to be enough to carry us through, and she typically gets a lot more social when she's around me, as I became a source of strength and stability for her (a lot of introverted women really admire an extroverted partner's social abilities). Once they know you're in their corner, they're able to gather more strength when out and about just by you being there.

Also, not all extreme introverts are Autistic - people are making that assumption about this one, but I don't think there's enough here to make a solid conclusion. There are a lot of things to be weirded out and overwhelmed about regarding society. Introverted people actually experience a hyper-exaggerated version of the world - and their senses are more easily overwhelmed. This isn't rhetoric; it is scientifically proven. They also tend to be more sensitive, both emotionally and physically. More on this can be found in this book here. http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introv...B004J4WNL2

Once you understand them a bit, they're worldview isn't so off-base. Just exxaggerated - depending on your own life paradigms, I guess. I know men who would look at the average club girl and cringe in disgust. She may be borderline Autistic, but it's hardly a given - you can't diagnose that from one post about her on a forum.

EDIT: I just caught your link about the autism scale. Doesn't really change any of my opinion. If all introverts fall somewhere on the autism scale, that kind of dilutes the meaning of the word to begin with doesn't it? They make up far too much of the population to write them off as dating material on that basis, and they still are preferable to extroverts as wives or girlfriends in a lot of ways.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #47

She has some serious issues - my bet is on high functioning autism - and your game is not fit to plow through to this girl- I know that because you said that you felt like shit after the last date. If I were you I'd next her asap and find one that isn't as broken. It will make you happier on the long run, I promise you that.

Post: #48

text her this "we have already been out twice, for the third date, just come over" or something to that effect. escalate and try to bang.

Post: #49

Give us an update OP