Catch 22
Chubby Chaser
 
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Thoughts on Approach Tonight
I'm kinda kinda new to this, so I'd appreciate any thoughts.
I was at Continental in Arlington (DC/VA) tonight, not the best venue but a 7.5 caught my attention. She was with a 5 and a guy. The guy seemed to be focusing more on the 5 (weird) more and the 7.5 looked bored, so I figured it was a decent chance to approach. So when my friends left, I was in dolo mode with a pretty full drink left, so I walked up and opened with Roosh's standby "You guys look you're having the most fun out of everybody here." That seemed to go ok and they brought me into the group - and I managed to tease the 7.5 a little and work in a disqualifier about how we'd never work. But admittedly I was hardly in control of the conversation. Turns out the girls were friends and the guy had approached them before me.
I've had a few approaches lately where I let them get away without even a number close, but later regretted it. So when they said they had to leave, I went for an admittedly desperation number close. She said earlier that she was getting her Master's Degree in a couple days, so I said "I normally don't date girls without Master's Degrees, but once you get yours we should go grab a drink." She said she had a boyfriend.
I seem to be getting the "I have a boyfriend" response more than I would have expected. Do you think I happen to just be picking women that have boyfriends? Or is this just a line meaning "you didn't impress me quickly enough"?
Any thoughts, mistakes, or tips on what I could have done better? At this point, I'm just pleased I approached, but I'd like to step it up here pretty soon.
I'm pretty f'ing picky, which is a problem (for now, but could be an asset later). I went up to a big group after this and got some obvious IOI's from a 5/6 (multiple arm touches within minutes when I spat zero game and she asked my name), but I just wasn't that interested. Can't seem to get myself to ladder up from the easy to land 6s yet. It's been tough when I'm only interested in 7+s but my game isn't back there yet (spent 7 years with a LTR).
(This post was last modified: 05-04-2011 11:05 PM by Catch 22.)
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| 05-04-2011 11:03 PM |
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Tuthmosis
Innovative Casanova
      
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RE: Thoughts on Approach Tonight
(05-04-2011 11:03 PM)Catch 22 Wrote: I seem to be getting the "I have a boyfriend" response more than I would have expected. Do you think I happen to just be picking women that have boyfriends? Or is this just a line meaning "you didn't impress me quickly enough"?
I've definitely noticed a marked spike it its use. It seems the "I have a boyfriend" line has become fashionable again with the bitches. That's my humble conclusion, anyway, based on my observations and the word on the street. I think it's a cyclical thing, or they meet at an annual convention and discuss this shit.
We should probably innovate some new ways to handle it (apart from ignoring it and just barreling through it, which is what I've been doing since this latest re-emergence).
The old stand-bys are tired as shit:
Girl: "Sorry, I have a boyfriend."
Player:
1. "I just met you and are you're already telling me your problems."
2. "So what." a.k.a. "I don't care."
3. "Where is he tonight?" [supposed to create doubt in her mind; complete bullshit that never worked]
4. "Me too!" [supposed to be funny/disarming]
Tuthmosis Twitter | IRT Twitter
(This post was last modified: 05-04-2011 11:31 PM by Tuthmosis.)
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| 05-04-2011 11:16 PM |
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gringochileno
Alpha Male
   
Posts: 1,255
Joined: Mar 2011
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RE: Thoughts on Approach Tonight
(05-04-2011 11:16 PM)Tuthmosis Wrote: (05-04-2011 11:03 PM)Catch 22 Wrote: I seem to be getting the "I have a boyfriend" response more than I would have expected. Do you think I happen to just be picking women that have boyfriends? Or is this just a line meaning "you didn't impress me quickly enough"?
I've definitely noticed a marked spike it its use. It seems the "I have a boyfriend" line has become fashionable again with the bitches. That's my humble conclusion, anyway, based on my observations and the word on the street. I think it's a cyclical thing or they meet an annual convention and discuss this shit.
We should probably innovate some new ways to handle it (apart from ignoring it and just barreling through it, which is what I've been doing since this latest re-emergence).
The old stand-bys are tired as shit:
Girl: "Sorry, I have a boyfriend."
Player:
1. "I just met you, and are you're already telling me your problems."
2. "So what." a.k.a. "I don't care."
3. "Where is he tonight?" [supposed to create doubt in her mind; complete bullshit that never worked]
4. "Me too!" [supposed to be funny/disarming]
I'm not convinced every girl has heard those stock answers a million times, you'd be surprised how many guys will just shut down, take the girl at her word, and assume they have no chance instead of continuing to spit game. However, I'm down to get some more solid responses out there. What do you think of these?
"So does my girlfriend."
Or:
Player: "I have a goldfish."
Girl: "Huh?"
Player: "I thought we were talking about shit that doesn't matter."
Or:
"Cool, I bet he's awesome. He can totally do the dishes and take care of the dog while we're getting drinks."
Or:
"Do you always flirt with guys when he's not around?"
(This post was last modified: 05-04-2011 11:40 PM by gringochileno.)
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| 05-04-2011 11:34 PM |
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Gmac
Innovative Casanova
      
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RE: Thoughts on Approach Tonight
(05-05-2011 10:38 AM)gringochileno Wrote: (05-05-2011 10:25 AM)Roosh Wrote: Quote:"I normally don't date girls without Master's Degrees, but once you get yours we should go grab a drink.
Needy close line... you just asked her to date you. You might as well ask her to be your girlfriend.
Next time just ask if she wants to grab a drink.
Your goal seems to be numbers... therefore you will not be getting more than numbers. Unless you kiss a girl, number is close to worthless, especially these days.
Roosh, what do you mean by this exactly? When I only get a phone number with no kiss, I've actually been getting the girl out on a date a reasonable proportion of the time, between 1 out of every 3 and and 1 out of 2. Obviously it's better to try and bang on the same night, but these numbers still don't seem "close to worthless" to me. Are you saying something different, like that it takes more work to convert that date into a notch when you haven't already kissed the girl?
Absolutely, its more work. You're starting out with less attraction and comfort built. Numbers without a kiss are fairly meaningless for night game.
Vice-Captain - #TeamWaitAndSee
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| 05-05-2011 11:41 AM |
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gringochileno
Alpha Male
   
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RE: Thoughts on Approach Tonight
(05-05-2011 11:41 AM)Gmac Wrote: (05-05-2011 10:38 AM)gringochileno Wrote: (05-05-2011 10:25 AM)Roosh Wrote: Quote:"I normally don't date girls without Master's Degrees, but once you get yours we should go grab a drink.
Needy close line... you just asked her to date you. You might as well ask her to be your girlfriend.
Next time just ask if she wants to grab a drink.
Your goal seems to be numbers... therefore you will not be getting more than numbers. Unless you kiss a girl, number is close to worthless, especially these days.
Roosh, what do you mean by this exactly? When I only get a phone number with no kiss, I've actually been getting the girl out on a date a reasonable proportion of the time, between 1 out of every 3 and and 1 out of 2. Obviously it's better to try and bang on the same night, but these numbers still don't seem "close to worthless" to me. Are you saying something different, like that it takes more work to convert that date into a notch when you haven't already kissed the girl?
Absolutely, its more work. You're starting out with less attraction and comfort built. Numbers without a kiss are fairly meaningless for night game.
I agree, but that still means that maybe I make out on date 1 and bang on date 2 or 3 instead of getting the notch on the first date. For me at least, that's still far from worthless. I'm wondering if Roosh has a different experience than this or if he meant something different from what I'm interpreting his statement to mean.
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| 05-05-2011 01:48 PM |
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Catch 22
Chubby Chaser
 
Posts: 348
Joined: Mar 2011
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RE: Thoughts on Approach Tonight
(05-05-2011 10:25 AM)Roosh Wrote: Next time just ask if she wants to grab a drink.
Shit, that would be a lot easier. Why's that the way to go?
Agreed though, number close was just a last resort because they were leaving and I didn't have a chance to isolate. Wouldn't have been surprised if she flaked and wasn't that surprised by the bf comment. The best I came up with in response, unfortunately, was "He wouldn't be ok with that?"
So gmac, I like the idea of ignoring the shit test and continuing gaming. So what would that mean in this situation? Just repeat the question?
Tuthmosis, we gotta send some moles in and fix that convention.
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| 05-05-2011 11:36 PM |
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CJ
Alpha Male
   
Posts: 1,303
Joined: Aug 2009
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RE: Thoughts on Approach Tonight
(05-05-2011 10:25 AM)Roosh Wrote: Quote:"I normally don't date girls without Master's Degrees, but once you get yours we should go grab a drink.
Needy close line... you just asked her to date you. You might as well ask her to be your girlfriend.
Next time just ask if she wants to grab a drink.
Your goal seems to be numbers... therefore you will not be getting more than numbers. Unless you kiss a girl, number is close to worthless, especially these days.
Most of those lines came off as kind of amateur to me, except maybe the Goldfish one.
As for going 75% direct, it varies, but that sounds about right. Every situation is different though, so you need to know how to flip quickly between direct and indirect at times. Only way to get good is practice, practice, practice.
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| 05-06-2011 05:19 PM |
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