Post: #1

Okay, there's this girl I've known for a couple of years. Since we first met I always expressed a romantic interest in her even though she was way "out of my league". I wasn't into game then so I made every mistake you could imagine.

Well last night she suddenly sends me a message expressing a desire to have sex with me. This is despite her being in a serious relationship. I just can't figure out how or why she suddenly went from being completely disinterested to being completely up for it. It's not like I just won the lottery or something.

I did mention to her that I almost slept with a mutual friend of ours but changed my mind (which was true), but as much as I know that women are attracted to men who can get other women, such a simple thing SURELY couldn't have caused her to do such a drastic u-turn and be willing to risk her current long term relationship for me.

Do you guys have any idea what could be going on here?

Post: #2

She wants to know if she can have you, or it's her boyfriend trying to trap you. Tread carefully playa.

Post: #3

(12-11-2014 06:09 AM)peterthephoenix Wrote:  She wants to know if she can have you, or it's her boyfriend trying to trap you. Tread carefully playa.

Yeah the latter is the first thing I thought too, but it's definitely her and for real. Maybe I shouldn't be questioning it, but I don't know, seems almost too good to be true.

Post: #4

Sounds like she is angry at or bored with her bf and wants an easy lay to make herself feel better. If you want to bang her, jump on this opportunity but don't expect anything consistent or for her to leave her LTR.

Post: #5

Strike whilst the iron is hot.

Post: #6

Play stupid.

1. Act surprised that she said this like "geez, that would be a big risk to our friendship...I wouldn't want things to be weird"
2. Follow up with a way to isolate "We should hang out sometime soon though, its been a while, you should swing by X day"

Once isolated/alone with her ply her with booze and kino like you would if you were picking up any other girl with the following differences:

1. Say NOTHING about her message - she has already put it out there and she knows it. It will create this crazy tension of you escalating but not acknowledging what shes said.
2. Talk about your friendship and how she 'gets' you, reminisce about any good times/inside jokes/secrets you two already share
3. Talk about how her friend hit on you but nothing happened.

All of these things will escalate a Taboo vibe that will make her start thinking about how wrong it is to bang you, but in a good way. If you SAY anything about it, it will be in her conscious, and then just wrong in a wrong wall...it will kill the vibe and she will bail.

I've banged too many married women or girl 'friends' this way.

Post: #7

what exactly did the message say

Post: #8

Do what Dr Howard said

Post: #9

(12-11-2014 06:06 AM)Celt Wrote:  Okay, there's this girl I've known for a couple of years. Since we first met I always expressed a romantic interest in her even though she was way "out of my league". I wasn't into game then so I made every mistake you could imagine.

Well last night she suddenly sends me a message expressing a desire to have sex with me. This is despite her being in a serious relationship. I just can't figure out how or why she suddenly went from being completely disinterested to being completely up for it. It's not like I just won the lottery or something.

I did mention to her that I almost slept with a mutual friend of ours but changed my mind (which was true), but as much as I know that women are attracted to men who can get other women, such a simple thing SURELY couldn't have caused her to do such a drastic u-turn and be willing to risk her current long term relationship for me.

Do you guys have any idea what could be going on here?

NO IDEA what's going on but you shouldn't care in the first place! It's one girl among what roughly 3.5 BILLION on this planet?

This is what you do: NOTHING. You can respond but be evasive and don't give her a clear answer. Say something along the lines that we can 'hang' later in the week or next week.

That's going to drive her bonkers. Why? Because she basically offered you sex and although she may not have been sincere about it she (as a woman) expects validation. She expects you to jump on it. By doing the exact opposite you now have an opportunity to elevate your station PLUS you can figure out her true motivations.

Act like a man - not like a little sex starved pussy. Dr. Howard pretty much nailed it although he's more of a player it seems (nothing wrong with that). I personally enjoy letting them squirm - once you get them questioning their value/station they become butter in you hands.

Post: #10

Thanks for the help, guys. Bit of an update. Things are progressing well. She's coming to see me in two weeks time and has already sent me a nude photo of herself which is something she'd never even have considered doing previously.

I've just got to play it cool until the time comes and I'm kind of struggling. I've wanted her for so long that I could easily come across as too desperate in trying to guarantee the bang. I even made the massive mistake of asking her why she was doing this behind the back of a guy she says she is madly in love with and has great sex with (still trying to make sense of the u-turn). But I managed to recover from that and we're still on track.

She always asks me about the other women I'm currently sleeping and/or flirting with and I make sure to spare her no details. That seems to make her more eager to get here. She lives a short distance away and is just coming up for the festive season without her boyfriend, which is when I'll get my chance.

Just got to play it cool. It isn't easy, even with all of this forum's advice in my head.

Post: #11

(12-12-2014 09:08 PM)Celt Wrote:  Thanks for the help, guys. Bit of an update. Things are progressing well. She's coming to see me in two weeks time and has already sent me a nude photo of herself which is something she'd never even have considered doing previously.

I've just got to play it cool until the time comes and I'm kind of struggling. I've wanted her for so long that I could easily come across as too desperate in trying to guarantee the bang. I even made the massive mistake of asking her why she was doing this behind the back of a guy she says she is madly in love with and has great sex with (still trying to make sense of the u-turn). But I managed to recover from that and we're still on track.

She always asks me about the other women I'm currently sleeping and/or flirting with and I make sure to spare her no details. That seems to make her more eager to get here. She lives a short distance away and is just coming up for the festive season without her boyfriend, which is when I'll get my chance.

Just got to play it cool. It isn't easy, even with all of this forum's advice in my head.

Fuck up avoidance game from here on out! When in doubt, don't say shit, let her talk. At this point she has a fantasy/script in her head and you just have to not interrupt.

Find a project/hobby/distraction to keep yourself busy for the next two weeks that is away from a computer or phone.

Post: #12

Just hope she won't change her mind during those 2 weeks.
Hamsters spin very fast: if you can, make it happen now.

Post: #13

Yeah she does seem to be growing a bit cold. Advice for keeping her with the idea would be appreciated.

Post: #14

Paint some images in her head of what you'll do. I like using long game stories like the ones Krauser has posted on his blog.

Post: #15

I'm fucking this up spectacularly. I got a gift from her through the post completely unexpectedly and it touched me deeply leading me to express the fact that I have feelings for her. She already knew this of course because I liked her since we first met. Truth is that even though I've had my heart broken more than once and I do try to be cold and cool as this forum prescribes, it's not really who I am. I do feel deeply and I want to say so. Once again got to pull this back. This story might end up being a lesson in how to screw up.

Post: #16

Let this mistake be a reminder for us all.
Never stop to game, whatever feeling you may be experimenting.
Good luck for the next ones.

Post: #17

Well things have taken another weird turn, one which might explain why she did this 180 in the first place. So obviously because I liked her for a long time but had given up long ago, I have her on Facebook. This forum taught me to never have love interests on Facebook, but since I never expected anything from her, I didn't think it mattered.

Well yesterday I happened to tag her in a post. Something I've done a million times in the past. But this time I get an annoyed message from her saying that it was stupid of me to do that because her boyfriend can see it. But wait a minute: this has never been an issue in the past. The only reason it would be now is if her boyfriend had some reason to be suspect of me. This made me wonder if she has been dropping him little clues about things warming up between us. In other words, I'm wondering whether her 180 was purely to make him jealous.

But rather than, say, come and kick my head in (which he could easily do), he instead went into a massive sulk and stopped speaking to her, which hasn't helped his cause because she sees it as being pathetic.

This situation is getting pretty messy. I'm almost past caring.

Post: #18

^But you do care and it's obvious.

Cell you're putting too much effort into just one girl. You're headed on the path of "oneitis" whether she comes to your side or not. This can be such a major issue that it affects other parts of your life. Based on the focused detail in your post regarding your affection, I can already tell it's happening.

Best remedy is to cold approach other girls and start getting other dates. Once you're indifferent, I'm sure your bang likelihood with this girl will go significantly higher than it is now.

It's up to you if you want to put in the work and get out of your comfort zone or not.

Post: #19

Yeah, you're right. I made clear that I wasn't happy with her complaining about what I did. I haven't contacted her since then and at this point I have no desire to. I'm sure I will soon, but I'm going to try and just let it lie. Maybe that will get her contacting me, maybe it won't. Not much else for it at this point.

Post: #20

Luckily this is the newbie sub forum so I won't flip out too much but it is clear what has happened.

You have scared the cat.

Fuck up avoidance means that you shut the fuck up and just nod your head in agreement. She had constructed a fantasy in her head of sneaking out and banging you, she was acting on it herself with the gift etc. Your job was to be silent and just let her spin her hamster in a positive direction.

It is clear that she does not like her boyfriend anymore either, based on what you shared. So what's going to happen next?

She has chaos at home now/boyfriend front and you have fucked up her cheating fantasy so she's likely all stressed out...if she's under 30 she's likely going to do what any stressed out girl in a downhill relationship looking for an escape is going to do...go and party, get blackout drunk and One night stand a random dude. You are not going to be that dude.

Post: #21

(12-16-2014 09:50 AM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

Luckily this is the newbie sub forum so I won't flip out too much but it is clear what has happened.

You have scared the cat.

Fuck up avoidance means that you shut the fuck up and just nod your head in agreement. She had constructed a fantasy in her head of sneaking out and banging you, she was acting on it herself with the gift etc. Your job was to be silent and just let her spin her hamster in a positive direction.

It is clear that she does not like her boyfriend anymore either, based on what you shared. So what's going to happen next?

She has chaos at home now/boyfriend front and you have fucked up her cheating fantasy so she's likely all stressed out...if she's under 30 she's likely going to do what any stressed out girl in a downhill relationship looking for an escape is going to do...go and party, get blackout drunk and One night stand a random dude. You are not going to be that dude.

Newbs have to touch the burner before they learn not to.

Celt, you better soak up what the good doctor here has said so you don't make the same mistake twice.

Post: #22

It's good. I came here exactly for this kind of advice. I still have weeks before she comes up here. Any chance I can bring this back?

Post: #23

Celt, when you felt that moment of "but I DO feel for her, the gift makes me want to tell her!" -- that's the test!

You are no less authentic or "kind" by delaying telling her some gush. That's what she wants. Playing it cool right there was the prime opportunity to get some more RPM out of the hamster (as Dr. Howard pointed out).

I just want to make the point that you wouldn't have been dishonest or inauthentic to WAIT to express the feelings. You could have simply told her when she got to you in person (after the bang, worded non-gushily), because that's even more "real".

A big part of red pill is realizing that when you do something counterintuitive that your previous "nice" self wouldn't have, it doesn't mean you're now "mean" or something.

Post: #24

(12-16-2014 10:08 AM)Celt Wrote:  It's good. I came here exactly for this kind of advice. I still have weeks before she comes up here. Any chance I can bring this back?

She is still coming to see you for sure?

Give us some info

Post: #25

No sweat there Celt. Some of the best players are born out of oneitis.

That said trying to dig any deeper into this situation will be like digging for your grave. Analysis paralysis reinforces needinees and neediness belies disaster. You wont be able to think clearly because you are already emotionally invested in the situation, despite the tactically sound advice you are receiving here.

It's your feelings for her that are killing your game





For experience's sake you could just go ahead and see this to the end which can be messy, but you will get some good experience from which you will become much wiser. Else go out approaching and try to get some more dates.

You should get some distance between you and her when this is done by the way. Having a girl that makes your hamster spin close by is horrible for self-development.