Post: #1

Trying to get her attention, do you tap a chick on the shoulder to start your rap?

WIA

Post: #2

Only in this circumstance but quite often...

I'm standing to the right or left of a girl in a crowded venue. Say we are at the bar and I'm standing slightly behind her. Being In her blind spot I tap the opposite shoulder, causing hee to loom away from me. Upon seeing that no one wants her attention she looks in the other direction. Where I am. I'm looking forward but when I see her look my way, I look her way and <insert opener here>.

This also works well as a deliberate trick if you have positive eye contact from the friend she is facing/speaking to. Before hand, you can even throw a finger to your lip like a 'shhh' so only the friend sees and them initiate the false tap.

Whatever you open with has to be said in a playful tone, otherwise its clearly try hard.

Post: #3

I think I've done it once or twice, usually I use a loud boisterous voice (I have a deep voice) to get a woman's attention or I'll say "hey" loud in a wtf way with a smirk.

Post: #4

"hey"

"hey"

"HEY!"

Post: #5

No, I touch (not tap) the side of her upper arm

Post: #6

(11-14-2014 06:40 PM)StrikeBack Wrote:  No, I touch (not tap) the side of her upper arm

For the purpose of this poll, that's semantics

But I see what you're saying. The side touch is less intrusive than the shoulder tap.

WIA

Post: #7

Grade School fun.

WIA

(11-14-2014 05:11 PM)jayyrod1 Wrote:  Only in this circumstance but quite often...

I'm standing to the right or left of a girl in a crowded venue. Say we are at the bar and I'm standing slightly behind her. Being In her blind spot I tap the opposite shoulder, causing hee to loom away from me. Upon seeing that no one wants her attention she looks in the other direction. Where I am. I'm looking forward but when I see her look my way, I look her way and <insert opener here>.

This also works well as a deliberate trick if you have positive eye contact from the friend she is facing/speaking to. Before hand, you can even throw a finger to your lip like a 'shhh' so only the friend sees and them initiate the false tap.

Whatever you open with has to be said in a playful tone, otherwise its clearly try hard.

Post: #8

Haha. I find this thread ironic because today there was a chick who was walking ahead of me and I attempted to stop her by tapping her on the shoulder, but she just sucked her teeth and kept moving - I didn't even get a word in.

Anyways, the lesson I learned: Don't tap a girl on the shoulder if she's on the move. It might work sometimes, sure, but most of the time it won't. I think it's best to do it when she's stationary -ahead of you in the grocery line, for example - because more than likely she's bored out of her mind and won't mind a little chit chat.

Post: #9

(11-14-2014 07:19 PM)game_ethic Wrote:  Haha. I find this thread ironic because today there was a chick who was walking ahead of me and I attempted to stop her by tapping her on the shoulder, but she just sucked her teeth and kept moving - I didn't even get a word in.

Anyways, the lesson I learned: Don't tap a girl on the shoulder if she's on the move. It might work sometimes, sure, but most of the time it won't. I think it's best to do it when she's stationary -ahead of you in the grocery line, for example - because more than likely she's bored out of her mind and won't mind a little chit chat.

There's not really enough data in your sample set to make that conclusion.

But I'm not a shoulder tapper in the 99% of situations.

WIA

Post: #10

Sometimes
But speaking gets a better response.

Especially with a stranger and you can catch someone off guard with the tap.

It depends though.

Post: #11

I do it but I don't tap. Tapping makes me think of spastic behavior and it makes me feel awkward just thinking about it. Hand contact on back.

Post: #12

Almost never. If Im on the dance floor I put my hand on her side a little above the ass and wait for the affirmative. If I am approaching a two set in a bar I usually walk close enough to make my intention known to the girl facing my direction and wait for her to signal the girl with her back to me that I am there.

I have always thought it was fascinating that even if my intended target has her back to me, I can tell how the interaction with her is going to go based on the way the girl facing me signals the target girl. If the girl facing me smiles to indicate my approach the girl with her back to me almost always follows suit when she turns around. If the girl watching me approach seems annoyed or hesitant when I approach then target girl will react the same way.

Post: #13

Touch her upper arm with the back of your fingers, the way you would get a friend's attention.

Post: #14

(11-15-2014 09:59 PM)polymath Wrote:  Touch her upper arm with the back of your fingers, the way you would get a friend's attention.

So you do this 100% of the time?

WIA

Post: #15

WestIndianArchie Wrote:Trying to get her attention, do you tap a chick on the shoulder to start your rap?

WIA

typically I start with
"yo....YOOOO!!! Pass me the mic!! PASS ME THE MIC!!!"

but real talk I think the few times I've tapped a chick on the shoulder it went like:
Me: "YOURE NOT GOING TO SAY HI?!?"
Her: "What?"
Me: "Youre [bullshit name] right?"
Her: blah blah gives me her name
Me: "oh youre much cuter im [me]"
both: small talk

Obviously could have played out better but that was the age of blue pill me and a total lack of game. For of the few times I've done some shit like this the women have been very open and not bitchy at all--Ive only done it in bars/clubs and never in sober environments.

Post: #16

Yeah

Why are you asking this question

Post: #17

(11-17-2014 02:05 PM)civpro Wrote:  Yeah

Why are you asking this question

It's a mental offshoot of the RSD controversy.

I forget which video it is, but it's about approaching or about the whole thing from meet to bang. It's mentioned but not discussed. It's just part of the approach process.

As a student of the game
- I know where newbs are coming from
- I know what social mores are being violated. And touching a stranger, a tap on the shoulder, fingertips on the back, "the claw", gorilla pimping grabs - all of that breaks unspoken rules.

You can get crazy hostile reactions from a tap, nudge, touch - and it will fuck up your approach before it even starts.

But the dude, wasn't Julien, mentioned it like you say mince the garlic and add to a hot pan with oil.

I don't know if that's ineptitude, lack of social grace, frame control, alpha mindset - but not talking about it does people a disservice.

And if body language is 90% of the game like some Gurus claim, the "laying of the hands" needs explanation.

Why are you asking me why I'm asking a question though?

WIA

Post: #18

No, and I think it's a bad idea unless you're in a highly social setting.

I just go up to girls and open them. With dominant body language and voice tones, they will usually stop.

Post: #19

If she's facing fully away from you, three calm taps on her shoulder.

Post: #20

(11-17-2014 02:22 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  - I know what social mores are being violated. And touching a stranger, a tap on the shoulder, fingertips on the back, "the claw", gorilla pimping grabs - all of that breaks unspoken rules.

You can get crazy hostile reactions from a tap, nudge, touch - and it will fuck up your approach before it even starts.

N.B. This is all based on my experience with Canadian culture.

I think it depends on the context. I almost never touch girls during the day because it violates their bubble, as you say. But say a girl is standing facing away from me on the bus, I'll tap her on the shoulder to get her to turn around, then open.

I'm quite new to night game so I can't say what's more effective. But I don't think one's breaking "rules" by touching a girl when one opens her in a bar or club. It's pretty normal to touch someone on the shoulder to get their attention in a loud environment. In crowded clubs people's bubbles become almost nonexistent as one has to push through the crowd/brush by others just to walk around. The other night what I'd often do is approach a girl from the side and put my hand on her shoulder to get her to look toward me, then open her. In the many approaches I did, I didn't receive any hostile reactions to this.

There are a number of studies that suggest that people actually have more positive reactions toward strangers who touch them, see points 1-4: http://www.spring.org.uk/2011/04/10-psyc...-touch.php

Both the bus and the club are loud, crowded environments where it's more difficult to pick out an initial address from someone, and the quantity of personal personal space expected is reduced. In these kinds of environments, touching strangers to get their attention is more socially acceptable. I certainly wouldn't do this in a coffee shop or grocery store.