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How to Answer: "How Are You?"
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tboz Offline
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Post: #1
How to Answer: "How Are You?"
I know this sounds like a dumb question, but how do I answer a girl's question when she asks, "How are you doing?" I usually answer, "I'm good, working and partying hard..." But to me, this feels boring and generic. I'd like to give a more exciting answer.. Let me know what you suggest. Thanks, guys.
10-29-2014 12:00 AM
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Veloce Offline
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Post: #2
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
My first reaction to this thread is that you're way overthinking things.

But then I thought about it, and some women really are terrible conversationalists. Sometimes "How are you?" is all they can come up with.

To answer your question, I think the emphasis should be less on coming up with an exciting answer, and focusing on answers that build interest.

Trying to sound exciting might come off as try-hard. The last thing you want to do is say shit like, "Oh man I'm just so busy, I've been partying every night and doing the daily hustle on top of it." I hear people say shit like that at work and it makes me cringe.

Think about interesting aspects of your life and develop conversation around that.

"How are you?"

"I'm good, just planning this trip that's coming up"
"I'm good, just recovering from this trip I just got back from."
"I'm sore, I was rock climbing/squatting/hiking all day yesterday"
"I'm tired, me and a friend did an impromptu road trip yesterday"
"I'm great, just bought tickets to go see (insert your favorite band/team/comedian)"

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

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10-29-2014 12:36 AM
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bojangles Offline
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Post: #3
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
I agree with Veloce. One thing though, don't reply in negative way and tell her all your worries and woes.

For eg.

"I'm sore" as Veloce put could be negative but he follows it up with a fun activity as being the reason.

You are overthinking this, it's just simple basic human conversation

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10-29-2014 07:20 AM
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Isaac Jordan Offline
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Post: #4
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
It depends on if she's genuinely asking (like if you just picked her up for a date), or if she's using the phrase as fluff (maybe she's a waitress or cashier and says that to everyone).

For the first scenario, go with what Veloce wrote. Use your response as an opportunity to describe your exciting life and pique her interest (Roosh describes this as "dropping bait"). Dangle an interesting piece of information in front of her, and aim to turn it into a conversation.

The latter scenario is easier, because 99% of the time, when people ask the question out of politeness the conversation goes like this:

Her: How are you?
You: I'm fine, you?
Her: I'm great, thanks.

So all you have to do is to stay away from the polite, courteous fluff-talk and you'll immediately stand out from the crowd.

I like to say something along the lines of "My day is a 9 out of 10 so far, how about yourself?"

This snaps her out of auto-response mode, forces her to focus on your conversation, and gives you several options depending on the response.

Sometimes, she'll ask why your day is going so well. Boom, conversational ball in your hands. Play on.

If she gives you a low number, make fun of her for being a Debbie Downer. Tell her she should grab a drink with you later to cheer up.

If she gives you a high number, high-five her. Get in a little kino and amp the energy up. Make up a crazy story about how you two should rent a limo and hit the town to "celebrate your good fortunes".

Either way, it's all about standing out from the norm. Get away from generic "I'm good, thanks"-type answers and you won't go wrong.
10-29-2014 09:58 AM
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tboz Offline
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Post: #5
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
(10-29-2014 12:36 AM)Veloce Wrote:  To answer your question, I think the emphasis should be less on coming up with an exciting answer, and focusing on answers that build interest.

Trying to sound exciting might come off as try-hard. The last thing you want to do is say shit like, "Oh man I'm just so busy, I've been partying every night and doing the daily hustle on top of it." I hear people say shit like that at work and it makes me cringe.

Think about interesting aspects of your life and develop conversation around that.

"I'm good, just planning this trip that's coming up"
"I'm good, just recovering from this trip I just got back from."
"I'm sore, I was rock climbing/squatting/hiking all day yesterday"
"I'm tired, me and a friend did an impromptu road trip yesterday"
"I'm great, just bought tickets to go see (insert your favorite band/team/comedian)"

Hi, Veloce.. Wow! That's very good! I'm definintely going to try these. I get the gist of it. Thanks man!

(10-29-2014 09:58 AM)Isaac Jordan Wrote:  For the first scenario, go with what Veloce wrote. Use your response as an opportunity to describe your exciting life and pique her interest (Roosh describes this as "dropping bait"). Dangle an interesting piece of information in front of her, and aim to turn it into a conversation.

I like to say something along the lines of "My day is a 9 out of 10 so far, how about yourself?"

If she gives you a low number, make fun of her for being a Debbie Downer. Tell her she should grab a drink with you later to cheer up.

If she gives you a high number, high-five her. Get in a little kino and amp the energy up. Make up a crazy story about how you two should rent a limo and hit the town to "celebrate your good fortunes".

Either way, it's all about standing out from the norm. Get away from generic "I'm good, thanks"-type answers and you won't go wrong.

Hey, Isaac Jordan.. Just to let you know, I meant that girls ask me this question over text. I appreciate your response and others here as well. Thanks guys.
10-30-2014 12:16 AM
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Gorgiass Offline
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Post: #6
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
Believe it was Juggler or Thundercat who came up with

How are you doing?
Awesome! How are you?
Good.
Damn, I was hoping to find somebody who was doing bad so I could cheer them up.

Breaks state, gets a laugh, sets you apart and buys a moment to find something situational you can riff on.
10-30-2014 12:45 AM
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h3ltrsk3ltr Offline
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Post: #7
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
I think if you're texting brevity is your friend. A simple "good" without punctuation has given me the best results. If you don't try very hard to keep the conversation going, she'll feel like she has to fill the void herself, allowing you to hold control over the frame of the conversation.

In person the innuendo of tone and body language is what seems to keep the average girl interested. I think that's best achieved by just being an interesting guy. If you have interesting shit going on in your life you'll be more naturally laid back, mysterious and confident.

"Brevity is the soul of wit. And tediousness the limbs and outer flourishes." -Shakespeare

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10-30-2014 12:18 PM
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Sturmgeist Offline
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Post: #8
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
"How are you?"

"I'm doing fucking awesome, how about yourself?"
10-30-2014 03:48 PM
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tboz Offline
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Post: #9
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
(10-30-2014 12:18 PM)h3ltrsk3ltr Wrote:  I think if you're texting brevity is your friend. A simple "good" without punctuation has given me the best results. If you don't try very hard to keep the conversation going, she'll feel like she has to fill the void herself, allowing you to hold control over the frame of the conversation.

Yes that's true. But it also depends on the type of female, how attracted she is, how much of an advantage you hvae over her, etc. I mean, not all females will tend to respond like that. But I wish they all would. Thanks.
10-30-2014 06:17 PM
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Blue Streak Offline
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Post: #10
RE: How to Answer: "How Are You?"
(10-30-2014 12:18 PM)h3ltrsk3ltr Wrote:  I think if you're texting brevity is your friend. A simple "good" without punctuation has given me the best results. If you don't try very hard to keep the conversation going, she'll feel like she has to fill the void herself, allowing you to hold control over the frame of the conversation.

[...]

"Brevity is the soul of wit. And tediousness the limbs and outer flourishes." -Shakespeare

The problem with a response like "good" is that you are not leading the conversation anywhere. I agree that your response should be brief, but it should direct the flow of conversation, not obstruct it. Something like "tired from going on a roadtrip yesterday" is brief but also demonstrates leading and an interesting life.
10-31-2014 12:29 AM
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