Post: #1

I decided to take a bit of a dating sabbatical to get my shit together in regards to dating. I stopped posting on RVF and made a plan to get my shit together (get in shape, get a better job, move to a better city).

My journey in a nutshell: I moved to Tampa to get my feet wet in my journey to become a player.

/thread-13218.html

I have since moved to Orlando

/thread-32274.htmld

Had some struggles with low paying jobs, got a bad girlfriend, ended up tossing the chessboard off the table and started over again six months ago.

I now live in a college town (I’m about two miles from the University of Central Florida, second largest campus in the country in terms of enrollment). I got a nice job making decent pay and got a place on the east side.

I ironed out most of my issues. I feel 95% of the reason why I struggle with women is become of inner game. Off the top of my head.

1.) I still struggle with approach anxiety.

2.) I am too introverted. It is far easier for me to sit at home and catch up on Sons Of Anarchy than go out and chase girls.

3.) I have negative beliefs lingering in my brain, a lot of it is being too damn self conscious.

4.) I don’t escalate.

5.) I still struggle with believing I can get the girl, even when she is all over me.

I can see that my lack of success in the past is affecting my present.

As time goes on (I’m 31) I am starting to feel that pain of regret, something that comes naturally with aging. I see now that the world is no longer my oyster (or at least I don’t have that feeling). I want to get a move on in dealing with this issue, once and for all.

My plan is to start going out, minimum, two nights a week, and once during the day. Being that I live in a college town, or at least an area where there is a large campus, there quite a few spots where young women frequent-from local bars to Walmart. I am guaranteed to see a hot chick when I go to Publix, Walmart, hell, Dunkin Fucking Doughnuts has cute chicks here. Tailgating on Saturdays brings tons of young hotties out. I think Orlando has a lot of potential for a up and coming player looking to do damage.

The mental roadblocks are a pain though. I feel like I’m stuck in a cage with a lion when I see a girl I want to approach or when it is time to kiss. At times I push through it, but it does fuck up some for sure bangs.

Also, as much as I “don’t give a fuck.” I get annoyed every time I tell a coworker that I’m hitting a bar to swoop some college chicks and he/she says that I’m too old to be dating young girls. One coworker, in his 40s, really made an issue of it “What do you have to say to an eighteen year old?” And called me a pervert. *sigh* I should have known better. The guy has three daughters.

But again, inner game. My belief is that there are plenty of young women who would LOVE to be with me. Let the losers worry about losing. I’m going forward with what I want out of life.

Shout out to El Mechanico, Giovinny, Moma, OGNORTHCAL, iknowexactly, oldnemesis (r.i.p), and all the other players that helped me get to this point. I finally (finally), feel ready to tackle this endeavor once and for all.

I’m going out tonight to see what damage I can do. I’ll will be posting my journey here.

Post: #2

Great bro and good luck. I also have this roadblock in my head that i am dealing with let me know how you deal with it

Post: #3

Out of curiosity, what made you leave Tampa? I left a couple months ago as well and I don't regret it.

There's a lot of chatter on RVF about why Tampa is a goldmine for women. Tampa women ARE hot, but they're pretty dumb and living in Tampa is a pretty unfulfilling experience if you've lived in another big city with more culture.

Post: #4

(09-24-2014 05:20 PM)apoclater Wrote:  Out of curiosity, what made you leave Tampa? I left a couple months ago as well and I don't regret it.

There's a lot of chatter on RVF about why Tampa is a goldmine for women. Tampa women ARE hot, but they're pretty dumb and living in Tampa is a pretty unfulfilling experience if you've lived in another big city with more culture.

I liked Tampa for about three months and then I grew tired of it.

For one, it is still a retirement community, or it largely caters towards that demographic. Concerts tended to have older musicians, the hang outs I went to had older crowds, and most of my friends in Tampa were in their 40s or above. I met some cool cats out there but I needed to be around Generation Y to be happier.

I did get a glimpse of what life is like after 40+ and I am glad to see that the game aint over. My wing man there was an Asian dude three years shy of 50 and he was smashing FSU chicks up to 50 year old catcher's mitts. I'd imagine if I was five years from 50 and I haven't left the USA I'd relocate to Tampa.

There are pockets of youth in North Tampa (USF), South Tampa (South Howard), and Ybor (awesome night life spot, real eclectic mix), but you will get over that fast if you hit the town three nights a week. You run into the same girl a lot in the clubs/bars, and that is in all mentioned areas. There isn't as much club/night life diversity like Miami or Orlando. They do have some nice clubs/bars though (PRANA, CZARS, MacDintons)

And yeah, Tampa is a culturally unfullfilling, but I gave up trying to recreate my Atlanta/New York City intellectual life a long time ago. Most people here think NPR is a drug. The beaches are nice but I got over that a while ago.

Women there, eh, yes, some of them are hot in surprisingly odd areas (I met a lot of really sexy white trash chicks in Clearwater/St. Pete. I never knew that category existed). South Tampa has your "dolled up , 40k a year millionaire blondes." Ybor keeps them young. hipster, and tattooed. I think if you like 5-6s-7-8s then you are good to go. You may catch a 9 but chances are she is on a rich dude's arm at the Blue Martini.

I prefer younger women with a deeper ethnic mix (especially Puerto Rican, Eastern European, and Brazilian), and who are more down to earth so moving to Orlando was a no brainer.

Post: #5

Hey brother. I am new to the game but much older than you but I am learning. Sounds like you dont live too far from where I do.

I travel for work quite a bit and I have spent some time in Tampa. Interesting to hear your take on things. Florida is a strange place. I am from Fla. But it seems no one else is.

We need to meet up some time for a drink.

Post: #6

(09-24-2014 10:27 PM)Captain Ahab Wrote:  

(09-24-2014 05:20 PM)apoclater Wrote:  Out of curiosity, what made you leave Tampa? I left a couple months ago as well and I don't regret it.

There's a lot of chatter on RVF about why Tampa is a goldmine for women. Tampa women ARE hot, but they're pretty dumb and living in Tampa is a pretty unfulfilling experience if you've lived in another big city with more culture.

I liked Tampa for about three months and then I grew tired of it.

For one, it is still a retirement community, or it largely caters towards that demographic. Concerts tended to have older musicians, the hang outs I went to had older crowds, and most of my friends in Tampa were in their 40s or above. I met some cool cats out there but I needed to be around Generation Y to be happier.

I did get a glimpse of what life is like after 40+ and I am glad to see that the game aint over. My wing man there was an Asian dude three years shy of 50 and he was smashing FSU chicks up to 50 year old catcher's mitts. I'd imagine if I was five years from 50 and I haven't left the USA I'd relocate to Tampa.

There are pockets of youth in North Tampa (USF), South Tampa (South Howard), and Ybor (awesome night life spot, real eclectic mix), but you will get over that fast if you hit the town three nights a week. You run into the same girl a lot in the clubs/bars, and that is in all mentioned areas. There isn't as much club/night life diversity like Miami or Orlando. They do have some nice clubs/bars though (PRANA, CZARS, MacDintons)

And yeah, Tampa is a culturally unfullfilling, but I gave up trying to recreate my Atlanta/New York City intellectual life a long time ago. Most people here think NPR is a drug. The beaches are nice but I got over that a while ago.

Women there, eh, yes, some of them are hot in surprisingly odd areas (I met a lot of really sexy white trash chicks in Clearwater/St. Pete. I never knew that category existed). South Tampa has your "dolled up , 40k a year millionaire blondes." Ybor keeps them young. hipster, and tattooed. I think if you like 5-6s-7-8s then you are good to go. You may catch a 9 but chances are she is on a rich dude's arm at the Blue Martini.

I prefer younger women with a deeper ethnic mix (especially Puerto Rican, Eastern European, and Brazilian), and who are more down to earth so moving to Orlando was a no brainer.

This is pretty spot-on from the three years I was there, I can relate. Biggest thing I also noticed is that South Howard/Ybor nightlife requires a tight social circle game. If you don't know people, good luck breaking in.

Post: #7

(09-25-2014 10:34 PM)apoclater Wrote:  

(09-24-2014 10:27 PM)Captain Ahab Wrote:  

(09-24-2014 05:20 PM)apoclater Wrote:  Out of curiosity, what made you leave Tampa? I left a couple months ago as well and I don't regret it.

There's a lot of chatter on RVF about why Tampa is a goldmine for women. Tampa women ARE hot, but they're pretty dumb and living in Tampa is a pretty unfulfilling experience if you've lived in another big city with more culture.

I liked Tampa for about three months and then I grew tired of it.

For one, it is still a retirement community, or it largely caters towards that demographic. Concerts tended to have older musicians, the hang outs I went to had older crowds, and most of my friends in Tampa were in their 40s or above. I met some cool cats out there but I needed to be around Generation Y to be happier.

I did get a glimpse of what life is like after 40+ and I am glad to see that the game aint over. My wing man there was an Asian dude three years shy of 50 and he was smashing FSU chicks up to 50 year old catcher's mitts. I'd imagine if I was five years from 50 and I haven't left the USA I'd relocate to Tampa.

There are pockets of youth in North Tampa (USF), South Tampa (South Howard), and Ybor (awesome night life spot, real eclectic mix), but you will get over that fast if you hit the town three nights a week. You run into the same girl a lot in the clubs/bars, and that is in all mentioned areas. There isn't as much club/night life diversity like Miami or Orlando. They do have some nice clubs/bars though (PRANA, CZARS, MacDintons)

And yeah, Tampa is a culturally unfullfilling, but I gave up trying to recreate my Atlanta/New York City intellectual life a long time ago. Most people here think NPR is a drug. The beaches are nice but I got over that a while ago.

Women there, eh, yes, some of them are hot in surprisingly odd areas (I met a lot of really sexy white trash chicks in Clearwater/St. Pete. I never knew that category existed). South Tampa has your "dolled up , 40k a year millionaire blondes." Ybor keeps them young. hipster, and tattooed. I think if you like 5-6s-7-8s then you are good to go. You may catch a 9 but chances are she is on a rich dude's arm at the Blue Martini.

I prefer younger women with a deeper ethnic mix (especially Puerto Rican, Eastern European, and Brazilian), and who are more down to earth so moving to Orlando was a no brainer.

This is pretty spot-on from the three years I was there, I can relate. Biggest thing I also noticed is that South Howard/Ybor nightlife requires a tight social circle game. If you don't know people, good luck breaking in.

Yep, it got pretty annoying trying to make friends there. I tried to break in, especially with the girls, but the other Alpha males weren't having it. Getting cock blocked was routine.

I did have some good times though. I prefer visiting the Bay then living there. I love blondes and Tampa has plenty of that. Gasparillia and Guavaween are must sees, first friday in St. Pete. Nice times.

Post: #8

(09-25-2014 01:06 PM)reco2100 Wrote:  Hey brother. I am new to the game but much older than you but I am learning. Sounds like you dont live too far from where I do.

I travel for work quite a bit and I have spent some time in Tampa. Interesting to hear your take on things. Florida is a strange place. I am from Fla. But it seems no one else is.

We need to meet up some time for a drink.

Sure thing. I'm from Florida as well, though I don't reflect the culture here much. PM me if you are ever in Orlando.

Post: #9

Great job on keeping yourself motivated. Also, I have lived in Tampa, Orlando and now Miami. If you have any questions, feel free to PM me.

Please keep us updated on your progress mang!

Post: #10

(09-26-2014 09:24 AM)Kaii Wrote:  Great job on keeping yourself motivated. Also, I have lived in Tampa, Orlando and now Miami. If you have any questions, feel free to PM me.

Please keep us updated on your progress mang!

Thanks. Glad to be back in the game. I'm glad to see Florida players are live and active in the RVF.

Post: #11

A little update.

I have been putting OT to cover some upcoming car repairs that will happen by the first week of November. Sadly, this has put some breaks on my player ambitions in terms of going out. That said, I still manage to go out once a week which is fine as I feel I don't mind doing a little warm up (I'll start going "all out" in January).

For now my goals are to work through my inner game material, stay in shape, stay away from the bad food, work a lot of OT to stack up some money (fix up my car, buy some decent clothes, save up for tuition next year for a class), and go out atleast once a week. My downtown adventures can be put on hold until my car is fixed up. For now, I'll focus on picking up girls around East Orlando.

I went out to a party Friday night at the invitation of my coworker. I introduced myself to almost all of the women at the party. One of them freaked out and ran off, but most were nice-easy conversation. I manged to get the number of an ethnic jewish girl. She is actually my home girls roommate (didn't know at the time). She was into me, laughing at my jokes, flirting. I like this prospect so I will hit her up sometime, definitely by next week.

I plan on going out Saturday so we will see how that takes me. There are plenty of bars I can hit up. I need to get over my insecurity about going to a college themed bars. Granted I'm older, but I don't look old. I like young college girls so I might as well get over my mental hang ups about my age and chasing younger women. Luckily, I will be signing up for a class next year to start my pre-occupational therapy work so essentially I am a college student again.

One thing I noticed about myself is that I am pretty superficial, in that a portion of my confidence is based on how I look and the things I buy. I am not sure why this is and honestly, I wish I didn't have this trait but it is there. I think working OT would be a good thing as it would give me more money to spend on decent clothes, and a better laptop. I feel better about myself when I have a macbook that is for sure.

Oh well, maybe I should iron out that "weakness" or perhaps embrace it. There are guys who have 90 bucks to their name that are getting laid left and right. I should be more like them.

Post: #12

(09-24-2014 10:10 AM)Captain Ahab Wrote:  Also, as much as I “don’t give a fuck.” I get annoyed every time I tell a coworker that I’m hitting a bar to swoop some college chicks and he/she says that I’m too old to be dating young girls. One coworker, in his 40s, really made an issue of it “What do you have to say to an eighteen year old?” And called me a pervert. *sigh* I should have known better. The guy has three daughters.

But again, inner game. My belief is that there are plenty of young women who would LOVE to be with me. Let the losers worry about losing. I’m going forward with what I want out of life.

Shout out to El Mechanico, Giovinny, Moma, OGNORTHCAL, iknowexactly, oldnemesis (r.i.p), and all the other players that helped me get to this point. I finally (finally), feel ready to tackle this endeavor once and for all.

I’m going out tonight to see what damage I can do. I’ll will be posting my journey here.

Haha thanks for the shout out Captain Ahab, good to see you posting on here again. I think I can relate to you a lot since we are about the same age, and I have dealt with all of your issues, to the point where it's kind of uncanny because I feel like I am reading something I wrote about myself in your posts.

I'm pretty sure before I have given you the same advice, (good advice that's a million X easier said than done), you need to start to work on and learn how to NOT GIVE A FUCK!!

I know when you have extreme anxiety issues or are very introverted, this can be a tough thing to actually do and live, but what you got to realize is that you cock block yourself mentally by letting your issues get the best of you, and you have nothing to lose by going out there and trying.

Mystery used to tell his students, "so what you get rejected by a girl, what's the big deal, what really bad is going to happen to you... Nothing. You aren't going to be physically harmed, you aren't going to lose your house, your car, your job, you're not going to die."

Being rejected sucks, no one likes the feeling, it can sting for sure, but in all reality it's pretty insignificant occurrance, and while in your head you might make it out to be a big deal it's really not. No one is paying attention and seeing or caring if you bombed with a chick, everyone is in their own worlds.

As far as what you wrote about your co-worker hating on you for trying to mack on college girls, that dude is just jealous and hating, because he's married to some women who probably isn't attractive and gives him a ton of shit, and he secretly desires hot young college girls, but knows he will never get them. Don't pay attention to people like this, even if they make up much of mainstream society. Mainstream society is lame, and you don't want to be anything like them.

From what people wrote before you are a good looking guy and in good shape, you're obviously very intelligent, you just need a bit more self confidence, you need to let go of your inhibitions, and just overcome your anxieties and fears. Just remember, you have nothing to lose, so what if some 22 year old 7 at the bar rejects you, she's just one of hundreds of girls and multiple bars that you could hit up that night. She's nothing, she's insignificant, she's just one of many bees, buzzing around the bee hive. Your job is not let the sting of a couple rejections, prevent you from getting the honey.

Post: #13

(10-06-2014 12:40 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

(09-24-2014 10:10 AM)Captain Ahab Wrote:  Also, as much as I “don’t give a fuck.” I get annoyed every time I tell a coworker that I’m hitting a bar to swoop some college chicks and he/she says that I’m too old to be dating young girls. One coworker, in his 40s, really made an issue of it “What do you have to say to an eighteen year old?” And called me a pervert. *sigh* I should have known better. The guy has three daughters.

But again, inner game. My belief is that there are plenty of young women who would LOVE to be with me. Let the losers worry about losing. I’m going forward with what I want out of life.

Shout out to El Mechanico, Giovinny, Moma, OGNORTHCAL, iknowexactly, oldnemesis (r.i.p), and all the other players that helped me get to this point. I finally (finally), feel ready to tackle this endeavor once and for all.

I’m going out tonight to see what damage I can do. I’ll will be posting my journey here.

Haha thanks for the shout out Captain Ahab, good to see you posting on here again. I think I can relate to you a lot since we are about the same age, and I have dealt with all of your issues, to the point where it's kind of uncanny because I feel like I am reading something I wrote about myself in your posts.

I'm pretty sure before I have given you the same advice, (good advice that's a million X easier said than done), you need to start to work on and learn how to NOT GIVE A FUCK!!

I know when you have extreme anxiety issues or are very introverted, this can be a tough thing to actually do and live, but what you got to realize is that you cock block yourself mentally by letting your issues get the best of you, and you have nothing to lose by going out there and trying.

Mystery used to tell his students, "so what you get rejected by a girl, what's the big deal, what really bad is going to happen to you... Nothing. You aren't going to be physically harmed, you aren't going to lose your house, your car, your job, you're not going to die."

Being rejected sucks, no one likes the feeling, it can sting for sure, but in all reality it's pretty insignificant occurrance, and while in your head you might make it out to be a big deal it's really not. No one is paying attention and seeing or caring if you bombed with a chick, everyone is in their own worlds.

As far as what you wrote about your co-worker hating on you for trying to mack on college girls, that dude is just jealous and hating, because he's married to some women who probably isn't attractive and gives him a ton of shit, and he secretly desires hot young college girls, but knows he will never get them. Don't pay attention to people like this, even if they make up much of mainstream society. Mainstream society is lame, and you don't want to be anything like them.

From what people wrote before you are a good looking guy and in good shape, you're obviously very intelligent, you just need a bit more self confidence, you need to let go of your inhibitions, and just overcome your anxieties and fears. Just remember, you have nothing to lose, so what if some 22 year old 7 at the bar rejects you, she's just one of hundreds of girls and multiple bars that you could hit up that night. She's nothing, she's insignificant, she's just one of many bees, buzzing around the bee hive. Your job is not let the sting of a couple rejections, prevent you from getting the honey.

Hey, OG is still alive. Glad to see some of the old guard is still around.

Are you still in the bay area? How are things in your neck of the woods?

I am glad you chimed in since we have similar backgrounds. You tend to be an intellectual man with a taste of urban. You can understand where I am coming from.

I agree with everything you said, especially in regards to learning not to give a "fuck." I am totally out of the mainstream. The American model isn't applicable to me, that is for sure.

I will focus on seeing what I like and making an opportunity to go after it. I have to get over my rejection issues and there is no way of doing it better than putting myself head on, feet to the fire.

The first lesson I want to internalize is NEVER BE AFRAID TO CRASH AND BURN! Much easier said than done but it is a priority, almost the cornerstone of having success with picking up women.

I agree that I don't need much more-I got a job, looks, good physique. Plenty of guys have less and do far more.

Make a plan and execute. I'm going out this Saturday to a party at the University of Florida-EDM rave event. I need to make something happen, even if I get a bunch of nos. I can't let life keep on slipping by.

Hope all is well on your end.